Latest / Neighbourly: Real Stories of Care and Community / Summer Speedos | Field Notes: Empty Chair
Transcript
- 0:05Welcome to Summer Speedos from Neighborly, our short in between season
- 0:09series. While Shannon takes a break from her regular interviews. I'm
- 0:13Johan, the producer of the show. Some episodes are field notes recorded
- 0:17outside in ordinary places where care actually happens. Others
- 0:20are story field notes, more cinematic reflections that start with a story
- 0:24from history or real life. Either way, we're paying attention to the small,
- 0:28ordinary ways care, faith, courage and community show up around us.
- 0:32So grab a cold drink or head out on that bike ride, walk or hike.
- 0:36Enjoy this year's edition of Summer Speedos from Neighbourly.
- 0:43Hey everyone. Welcome to the Neighbourly Podcast, a podcast about ordinary
- 0:47people showing extraordinary care. I'm Johan, the producer
- 0:51of the show. This summer, while Shannon takes
- 0:55a break from our regular interviews, we're doing a few shorter episodes called
- 0:58Field Notes on Ordinary Care. I'll be recording some of these while
- 1:02taking walks through my neighborhood. Maybe some parks,
- 1:05trails and places where life is actually happening.
- 1:09Because we're going to talk about loving our neighbors, it's probably
- 1:13going to help to occasionally leave the studio and stand near
- 1:16some actual neighbors. Also, my studio is a
- 1:20windowless basement office, so this is partly a creative
- 1:24choice and partly a public health intervention. I need
- 1:27a little sunlight so I don't look quite so pasty, like printer
- 1:31paper with headphones. Here I am sitting
- 1:35on a park bench. Birds are tweeting after a
- 1:39nice rainfall we had earlier this morning. Trees are green and
- 1:43it's pretty quiet. Anyway, on my way here on my
- 1:47walk, I came upon a house that had an empty chair
- 1:50outside and I don't know why it stopped me, but I couldn't decide whether it
- 1:54means absolutely nothing or maybe a little too much.
- 1:58It was just a chair, faded, a little tired,
- 2:02the kind of outdoor chair that looks like it has survived many summers
- 2:07and at least one family member saying we should really throw
- 2:10that out. It might mean nothing. Someone went inside,
- 2:14someone is at work, someone forgot it there and has
- 2:18emotionally moved on. But empty chairs have a way of
- 2:21asking questions. Who used to sit there? Who used
- 2:25to show up? What kind of conversations might one have
- 2:29had sitting at the chair across from someone else who
- 2:32used to be part of the rhythm and is now not around so much?
- 2:37Every community has empty chairs, not always
- 2:40literal ones. There's the one person who used to stay after
- 2:44church and now leaves quickly. The neighbor who used to wave and
- 2:48now keeps their head down. The friend who used to text
- 2:52back right away and now replies three days later,
- 2:55sorry, things have been a lot. There's the
- 2:59volunteer who quietly stepped back the family you've not seen
- 3:03in a while. The person who did not announce a crisis. They just
- 3:06slowly disappeared from the pattern. That kind of
- 3:10absence is easy to miss because it doesn't make
- 3:14noise. A crisis announces itself.
- 3:18Absence just leaves a little space where someone used to be.
- 3:22And if we're busy enough, we digest without asking why.
- 3:26That's not because we're terrible. It's because life keeps moving.
- 3:30But neighbourly care pays attention to absence. It
- 3:34asks who is not here. Not in a suspicious
- 3:38way, not in a clipboard way, and please don't
- 3:41become the attendance police of human suffering, but in a
- 3:45loving way. The way a shepherd notices one sheep missing.
- 3:49That image from Jesus has become so familiar that we can
- 3:53forget how tender it is. The the one matters.
- 3:57The missing one matters. The person who is not
- 4:00visible still belongs. People should not have to
- 4:04disappear dramatically before someone checks in.
- 4:08And the check in doesn't need to be dramatic either.
- 4:11Sometimes it's as simple as. Hey, I noticed I've not seen you
- 4:15in a while. No pressure. I just wanted to check in.
- 4:19Or you. You came to mind today. I'm
- 4:23grateful for you. Or maybe if life has
- 4:27been heavy lately, you don't have to explain it at all. I just wanted you
- 4:30to know that you are not forgotten. You see, that kind of message
- 4:34doesn't fix everything, but it does something important.
- 4:39It tells the person their absence was noticed and their
- 4:43presence matters. So this week, maybe
- 4:46look for the empty chairs. Who used to be part of your
- 4:50rhythm, who has gone quiet, who might need
- 4:54a gentle check in before the gaps get wider. You
- 4:57don't need to make it dramatic. Just notice.
- 5:01Then reach out with care. That is the field
- 5:05note. Keep noticing.
- 5:20It.