Latest / The Lila Rose Show / E113: The Warrior Poet, Masculinity Fully Lived w/ John Lovell

Transcript

E113: The Warrior Poet, Masculinity Fully Lived w/ John Lovell · The Lila Rose Show

• 0:00
  What do you think about some of the newer movements that men
• 0:03
  have been attracted to? For example, there's Red Pill.
• 0:06
  I know what money has to offer power and influence.
• 0:10
  I know what physical fitness. I know special operations.
• 0:13
  I know the very pinnacles of masculinity and achievement.
• 0:19
  I know what those are, and they're hollow rags compared to
• 0:22
  just being able to play with my sons and dance with my wife in
• 0:26
  the kitchen. And these Red Pill guys will
• 0:28
  never know it. Hey guys, welcome back to the
• 0:34
  Lila Rose Podcast. Today we've got John Lovell of
• 0:38
  the Warrior Poet Society in studio with us.
• 0:41
  We actually just had a great conversation about all things
• 0:44
  pro-life and John's own journey in that with his beautiful wife
• 0:47
  Becca. It's very powerful, their
• 0:48
  personal story. And you can see that at the live
• 0:50
  action YouTube today we're going to get into masculinity,
• 0:53
  femininity, what a warrior poet is, all of the good things.
• 0:57
  And so John, thanks so much for joining the podcast.
• 1:00
  Thrilled to be here. This is going to be.
• 1:01
  Fun. All right, so we were just
• 1:03
  talking about your pro-life journey.
• 1:06
  You and your wife were on waiting lists to adopt for a
• 1:09
  long time before that, you were sharing some of your life story.
• 1:12
  Introduce our podcast listeners to what the Warrior Poet Society
• 1:16
  is. Sure.
• 1:17
  It's a like minded group of protectors.
• 1:21
  We are, we call ourselves warrior poets.
• 1:23
  It's tapping into the ancient warrior archetype and also the
• 1:27
  poet archetype. So that means we're like good at
• 1:29
  defending a family, but we're also good at keeping a family
• 1:32
  together. And so we're lions and lambs.
• 1:35
  We are lovers and fighters at the same time and so that's us.
• 1:42
  We live for higher purpose and are ready to sacrifice in the
• 1:44
  defense of others so. I love that way of speaking
• 1:48
  about masculinity because I think we tend to extremes in our
• 1:52
  culture today, which is the extreme of machismo, or at least
• 1:57
  people say it's machismo. These men, they're just, you
• 2:00
  know, tyrannical or dictators, you know, this excess of
• 2:03
  masculinity over here or a defect of masculinity over here
• 2:07
  where there is the beta male, you know, who's not taking
• 2:10
  leadership, who's not being a leader, who's not taking care
• 2:13
  and committing to family or to, you know, community and service.
• 2:16
  And, you know, it's that stereotype of the guy sitting on
• 2:19
  the couch endlessly playing video games.
• 2:21
  Whatever, Not to say all video games are wrong.
• 2:24
  We did actually talk about that earlier.
• 2:26
  You had some great thoughts on video games, actually.
• 2:29
  So I think it's. I think it's needed.
• 2:32
  Thank you. Yeah.
• 2:34
  What? What's been your journey with
• 2:36
  that? I know you've had, I think the
• 2:37
  channel, your YouTube channel for I think it's been seven
• 2:39
  years in watching the response from men, especially young men
• 2:43
  who are coming around and really learning a lot from your
• 2:48
  approach and and what you're teaching.
• 2:50
  Incredible attraction. I get emails all the time of
• 2:52
  people who are they've given up on their marriage and they it's
• 2:56
  been revitalized and they are making the practice of pursuing
• 3:01
  their wife again. And you know, the wives as well
• 3:06
  are doing their part. I think a wife should try to
• 3:09
  seduce her husband forever and we go hunting forever, you know,
• 3:13
  and I think that's really well. She draws us in and we we come
• 3:17
  after and that's that's a good thing.
• 3:21
  And to see those marriages really revitalize.
• 3:24
  I see dads stepping up to to be good fathers maybe a lot.
• 3:29
  A lot of folks didn't have good dads and they Rage Against that
• 3:35
  in their normal lives. But to take constructive steps
• 3:38
  at at breaking that generational gap and being a good dad and
• 3:42
  then stepping up to to become more dangerous, to be a good
• 3:45
  protector. You know understanding hey the
• 3:48
  world's broken and it's dangerous.
• 3:50
  I am my brother's keeper. And I will not let evil win on
• 3:54
  my watch. I'm I'm we're playing zone all
• 3:57
  over the country's warrior poets ready to be able to protect
• 3:59
  people. And so guys kind of stepping in
• 4:04
  to that dangerous bold strong masculinity that also
• 4:08
  understands the role of romance and emotional availability of
• 4:15
  you know, loving your family and friends and serving in church
• 4:19
  and that's it. The full embodiment of what
• 4:23
  masculinity should be, not a caricature as we swing from wide
• 4:28
  pendulum of you know, this false bravado, this chest beating
• 4:34
  machismo versus some kind of responsibility abdicating beta.
• 4:41
  And we sweep back and forth with these two in a false dichotomy
• 4:45
  when it really you should be a lover and a fighter, not either
• 4:48
  or. And to be one of the other is to
• 4:51
  be deficient as a man. It's really to be deficient in
• 4:54
  the other of like to be a lover and not a fighter is to be a
• 5:00
  sham for real love protects, you know?
• 5:04
  And so there's been great response.
• 5:07
  Dudes are coming alive. We're getting stronger
• 5:10
  qualitatively, we're getting stronger in ourselves and our
• 5:13
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• 6:37
  What do you think about some of the newer movements that I think
• 6:40
  the masculine or men have been attracted to?
• 6:43
  For example, there's red Pill. And you know, I do think that
• 6:47
  because of feminism and other economic factors, there's this
• 6:50
  backlash against really in many ways society putting men down.
• 6:55
  And some, I think a lot of men find themselves attracted or
• 6:58
  drawn to today, especially kind of, you know, there's that term
• 7:01
  incel that's used in voluntary celebrate or whatever attracted
• 7:06
  to the red pill world. Right.
• 7:09
  I think there is a movement of guys that really flocked toward
• 7:13
  that red pill stuff because they're holding up things that
• 7:17
  are good things, virtuous things, things that are missing
• 7:20
  and lacking. And you're standing up kind of
• 7:23
  with a spine and boldly declaring it.
• 7:27
  And so that's what they're attracted to.
• 7:28
  And guess what? That that piece is right.
• 7:30
  Men should be strong, they should be tough.
• 7:33
  They should be long-suffering. They should be disciplined, They
• 7:36
  should be bold about about what matters.
• 7:39
  They should be active. And all those things are
• 7:41
  absolutely true. But the problem is, is a lot of
• 7:45
  guys that get caught up in this, those who want to be top G,
• 7:49
  don't realize that they're going down a a path of destructive
• 7:54
  narcissism. That's what it's going to end
• 7:57
  up. If you you don't realize that as
• 7:59
  you are working on yourself and you're getting so much stronger
• 8:05
  and better in all these different ways, you are also
• 8:07
  missing some of the most important aspects of your life.
• 8:10
  And it's going to take you 10 years to realize the vanity and
• 8:14
  the dead end of all that. You're going to have a real good
• 8:18
  run for a few years. You can get in shape.
• 8:20
  That's good. You're going to gain some
• 8:23
  self-confidence and some autonomy and that's good.
• 8:25
  But you never learn how to adore a bride and fall head over heels
• 8:32
  in love with them in a safe, covenantal relationship and
• 8:36
  raise up some kids and have that fullness.
• 8:38
  I was thinking about this the other day.
• 8:41
  I travel a good bit, but even now here I'm in California.
• 8:44
  I just want to be home with my family.
• 8:46
  Now. I've been gone a day and I
• 8:49
  travel the world. I've been to nearly 40
• 8:52
  countries. My favorite place is just at
• 8:55
  home. I I could hit the town and go to
• 8:58
  bars and do whatever I want to fight.
• 8:59
  No, no, no. I I know what those have to
• 9:03
  offer. I know what money has to offer.
• 9:06
  I know what power and influence. I know what physical fitness.
• 9:10
  I know special operations. I know the very pinnacles of
• 9:15
  masculinity and achievement. I know what those are, and
• 9:19
  they're hollow rags compared to just being able to play with my
• 9:23
  sons and dance with my wife in the kitchen.
• 9:26
  And these red pill guys will never know it.
• 9:28
  They, they have no idea of what happily ever after with the
• 9:33
  bride of my youth. Can be.
• 9:34
  We're 17 years in. They will never understand that.
• 9:38
  I look at this quick dating hookup culture with abject pity
• 9:45
  and I see your riches filled with a poverty that you couldn't
• 9:49
  understand. It's hollow.
• 9:51
  It ends in absolute a wasted life and it's a shame there's a
• 10:00
  better way. What is that way when you're
• 10:03
  dealing with? I was just had Zubi on the show
• 10:06
  who's a rapper but also influencer, podcaster and he is
• 10:11
  friends with like Andrew Tate is my understanding and you know,
• 10:14
  he kind of knows people at all these different worlds and he
• 10:17
  has a lot of, you know, I think his view is more on I think what
• 10:21
  you're describing. You know he's very pro marriage
• 10:23
  and fidelity, but he has a lot of and he was explaining a lot
• 10:26
  of the empathy, I guess you could say or understanding he
• 10:29
  definitely has for people in Red Pill who are afraid of not
• 10:35
  rejection but being used and they're afraid.
• 10:39
  He says not of marriage but of divorce.
• 10:43
  And he and I actually had this interchange about prenuptials
• 10:46
  and he was saying how he's so for prenups, especially as a man
• 10:50
  of means because it's an insurance policy in case you get
• 10:53
  used, basically. What's your take on that?
• 10:57
  I'd love to know what you think about prenuptial agreements.
• 11:00
  Well, like my, My husband is passionately against them.
• 11:03
  Yeah, because he's like, I'm all in till death do we part.
• 11:07
  And I'm not going to do an insurance policy on you because
• 11:11
  we can do a life insurance policy on us in that sense.
• 11:14
  But this is not about what's mine is yours and he's mine
• 11:18
  body, heart and soul. And I'm his body, heart and
• 11:20
  soul. And he's our leader.
• 11:21
  But we are one flesh. Ideally, that resonates, and me
• 11:26
  and my wife were both that way too.
• 11:28
  But before I just completely castigate the arguments of the
• 11:31
  Red Red Pill movement and push it aside, I will concede that
• 11:36
  they've got some reason to be upset of like that here, This
• 11:40
  this is a Horror Story. It's a Horror Story that I
• 11:43
  heard, and it's a placeholder for what's happened to many
• 11:46
  folks. Let's say it's in the South.
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  A woman cheats on her husband and then, after becoming aware
• 11:57
  of this, files for divorce the man.
• 12:01
  Has she files for the divorce? Sure, she files for divorce.
• 12:05
  The man has to go and get a little apartment.
• 12:09
  Meanwhile, she has the guy she cheated on move in.
• 12:13
  So now this man lives in his home with his wife raising his
• 12:20
  children while the husband lives in an apartment and sends her a
• 12:26
  check constantly. So now she gets half of
• 12:30
  everything. He had regular payments to her
• 12:35
  and she gets the supplemental income of this new guy with a
• 12:39
  fling. And the husband didn't initiate
• 12:42
  any of this. I mean, of course there there's
• 12:45
  no two ways, but it's it's not like, oh, she was all wrong and
• 12:48
  he was all right. That's just not how
• 12:52
  relationships actually end. But I'm just saying that that's
• 12:57
  a Horror Story and that happens. And that's not fair.
• 13:02
  That's outrageous, particularly in the South, the rights of a
• 13:07
  man over her kid over his own kids, really.
• 13:10
  Custody is assigned primarily the wife by default.
• 13:13
  It's very difficult for a man to be able to do that.
• 13:15
  She's going to immediately get that because based on some old
• 13:19
  in erroneous pop psychology from back in the day when these laws
• 13:23
  were being made, the idea was that kids needed a mom more than
• 13:27
  a dad. And now I have plenty of data to
• 13:29
  support. Note, they need a dad as much as
• 13:32
  they need a mom. The dad breeding certain
• 13:35
  elements that are absolutely critical for the development of
• 13:37
  a child, and so does the mom, and it's the working pair that
• 13:40
  can helpfully raise a kid. But no matter how good a mom you
• 13:44
  are, Lila, you're a terrible dad.
• 13:49
  And I'm. I'm a terrible mom.
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  I I have the hope, the chance, the opportunity to maybe become
• 13:56
  a good dad. But no matter how hard I try,
• 13:59
  I'm I'm never going to be able to be what my wife is to our
• 14:03
  kids. And so it takes both and, so.
• 14:06
  So what's the solution to that Horror Story?
• 14:08
  Because I think you're right. And and I don't mean to
• 14:10
  criticize Zuby unfairly in any way, 'cause I think he again
• 14:13
  makes some good points. But I disagree with his stance
• 14:15
  100% on prenuptials for everybody of means, basically.
• 14:20
  And we got into it and we, I think we'll be having more
• 14:22
  conversations, I hope in the future, 'cause we only got into
• 14:25
  it so much as we could in 45 minutes.
• 14:27
  But you know that Horror Story you just named has happened is
• 14:31
  happening. What is the solution?
• 14:35
  Some people say, OK, no fault, divorce should be off the table.
• 14:38
  If there's fault involved, like cheating, then that doesn't mean
• 14:42
  you get special perks and privileges down the line, right?
• 14:45
  You know, well, something that doesn't reward a wife for
• 14:49
  walking away from a marriage. She gets economically
• 14:52
  incentivized, gets to have everything she She gets her
• 14:55
  house, she gets her kids, she gets the money, she gets to get
• 14:58
  a new fling. And it's like that is really
• 15:02
  crappy. From a from a good from a good
• 15:04
  marriage. You're saying, though, you're
• 15:05
  not talking about those cases 'cause people say what about
• 15:07
  abuse? You know what I mean?
• 15:09
  You can, you can grab, well, what about this?
• 15:12
  I'm like, Oh yeah, it'll be completely different.
• 15:13
  But here, based in just the context that I described, that's
• 15:18
  jacked up and the red pill movement can latch onto stories
• 15:21
  like that and say, that's awful. I'm not risking that.
• 15:25
  Why would I do that? And meanwhile, they've seen
• 15:28
  broken relationships. They come from broken
• 15:30
  relationships and they come to the assumption that all
• 15:32
  relationships will break. And there is no such thing as
• 15:35
  happily ever after. They've never seen and
• 15:37
  experienced what we have. And so when we talk about our
• 15:41
  marriages, it goes right over their heads.
• 15:42
  They don't believe it's even possible.
• 15:45
  I wish. Or they think we're faking it,
• 15:47
  maybe. Or we're delusional and it's
• 15:49
  going to, you know, something's going to hit the fan soon at
• 15:52
  some point. What I wish is I could just take
• 15:55
  each one of them and have them be a family on my wall in my
• 15:59
  home any day of the week. And they'll see me reading with
• 16:02
  my boys and they'll see me and my wife and me and my wife
• 16:05
  aren't perfect, of course, but 17 plus years into our marriage,
• 16:08
  we've figured some stuff out. We're we're not we're not
• 16:10
  newlyweds anymore and we've got an incredible marriage that we
• 16:14
  had to work very, very hard at marriage.
• 16:17
  It it's probably one of the hardest things I've ever done
• 16:20
  and that's saying something because people understand I've
• 16:22
  done some very hard things. It's one of the hardest things
• 16:25
  I've done. I'll say it's it is likely the
• 16:28
  most rewarding thing I've ever done too.
• 16:29
  It is the most rewarding thing I've ever done too.
• 16:32
  Anything hard hard won is is well enjoyed it it it's worth
• 16:36
  it. And the Red pill movement guys
• 16:39
  will man up in some ways but don't understand what it is to
• 16:43
  pursue one woman forever. It's an incredible thing, an
• 16:47
  incredible and worthy goal of of that'll take every bit of who
• 16:51
  you are is a man to pursue this woman forever.
• 16:55
  Whether you feel like it or not. There's some good discipline for
• 16:58
  you and the wife needs to be on board with that too.
• 17:01
  But I think the problem is, is they've never even seen what's
• 17:04
  possible. How do you, how do we solve that
• 17:08
  for potentially millions of men, not just in the United States
• 17:11
  but worldwide, Can't have them all out to the homestead, you
• 17:16
  know, one at a time. We have we live in a little
• 17:19
  farmhouse and our our living room is is quite tiny, so yeah,
• 17:24
  you can't have them there. But hopefully some watching this
• 17:27
  message will at least understand that there is a more full life
• 17:33
  possible. I'm thinking of one guy who's a
• 17:36
  head of a head of like red pill movement guy and I know that he
• 17:41
  had he really likes Bugatti's real expensive, like $1,000,000
• 17:46
  cars. Who are Utah he met?
• 17:49
  And I don't know this. I've never met him.
• 17:51
  But anyway, he's talked. He's got Bugattis and mansions
• 17:55
  and money, and I know all about this stuff.
• 18:00
  His pornography businesses. I know about this stuff.
• 18:03
  I have no idea whether he's married or not.
• 18:05
  I I'm not sure if he's married or how that's going.
• 18:10
  Meanwhile, anyone watching me and we I've got millions of
• 18:12
  folks that that know who who I am now.
• 18:16
  At this point, nobody really knows my net worth.
• 18:20
  Nobody really even knows what I drive.
• 18:22
  They think they do. They don't.
• 18:23
  Tractor. I do drive a tractor, but no, I
• 18:27
  I drive old stuff, old cheap stuff.
• 18:29
  I don't care. But they know a lot about my
• 18:32
  marriage. Why?
• 18:33
  Because I talk about what I value.
• 18:36
  And what I see is this particular guy doesn't value his
• 18:40
  wife. He doesn't value.
• 18:41
  I think he has. I think I if I understand who
• 18:43
  you're talking about, I think there's wives or multiple
• 18:46
  relationships. And you know, I I remember I'm
• 18:50
  thinking about the Tate brothers, talking about how they
• 18:52
  live in a home together as brothers and their women lives
• 18:56
  elsewhere. They won't even be under one
• 18:59
  roof and it's certainly not one woman.
• 19:00
  And it's almost like they are espoused.
• 19:03
  You know, the way that I read that I was like it's almost like
• 19:05
  they're married to each other as opposed to their own partners,
• 19:09
  wives that are not even maybe legally married to.
• 19:11
  And it's like the harm down the street.
• 19:16
  I don't know how to say this so that the Red Pill guys could
• 19:21
  actually believe me. I'll just say I stake my
• 19:24
  integrity on it. I do pity them.
• 19:28
  I pity them. I'm like, no, you just wish you
• 19:30
  had. No, no, no.
• 19:32
  I am not a poor man. I'm doing very well.
• 19:35
  You know, I, I, I, I have a finance degree and I'm not new
• 19:39
  in my career. I've done, I'm doing just fine
• 19:43
  in that respect. I'm not jealous.
• 19:46
  Even your accolades of no, no, no.
• 19:48
  I've I've, I've visited the the mountain tops of masculinity and
• 19:53
  I pity what they'll never know in faith.
• 20:00
  In in my relationship with Jesus, don't.
• 20:03
  They don't know in what I have with my kids, they'll never have
• 20:08
  what I have with my wife. You'll never know.
• 20:13
  And that's that's sad. That's real sad to me.
• 20:16
  And I don't say it in any condescending kind of way
• 20:19
  because it could be taken that way.
• 20:21
  And I'm not looking down, you know, if I'm just saying what
• 20:25
  you value, you assume that is my top desire as well.
• 20:31
  And it's not. I've found something far, far
• 20:34
  more fulfilling and have gone after it.
• 20:36
  So I might take hold of it with both hands.
• 20:38
  And that's Jesus and that's my wife and that that's my kids,
• 20:41
  that's my church, that's my close friendships.
• 20:44
  And I've found there's something far better than being top G and
• 20:48
  it's not the pinnacle of pride. It's actually in selfless
• 20:52
  service and humility. It's not in self love.
• 20:55
  It's loving to others. That's what I found that it.
• 20:58
  I've found that it is better to give than to receive.
• 21:03
  It's better to realize that it's not about me than to think
• 21:07
  erroneously and to your own adventure, demise and detriment
• 21:10
  that it is all about you. That's top G lifestyle.
• 21:14
  It's all about you. And as you inflate bigger and
• 21:18
  bigger, you're going to find that your life is hollow and you
• 21:24
  will spend it after vain pursuits.
• 21:26
  And it's going to take you a long time to realize that you
• 21:29
  followed false idols down paths of destruction.
• 21:34
  It's sad when I think about the whole issue of, you know, Red
• 21:38
  Pill or even the prenup conversation.
• 21:40
  And again, I think Zuby's amazing.
• 21:42
  He's doing some amazing stuff. I love so many of his messages.
• 21:45
  He's super pro-life, all of this stuff.
• 21:47
  But I also think about, you know, let's say, you know, in a,
• 21:50
  in a situation where someone really thinks prenups are
• 21:52
  important, but they're traditionally, they want to have
• 21:54
  a marriage, They don't believe in divorce.
• 21:56
  And the woman that they love doesn't want that prenup.
• 21:59
  They do not want that prenup. And that's the deal breaker.
• 22:02
  You know, like 3,000,000 bucks that you had in your bank
• 22:04
  account before you get married. You wanted to protect it so
• 22:07
  badly that you walk away from the love of your life, love of
• 22:09
  your life because you're afraid that she might divorce you in 10
• 22:11
  years, you know? And so the whole kind of that
• 22:14
  whole universe, I get it like what you're saying, that Horror
• 22:16
  Story. I think there's real world
• 22:18
  issues that need to be addressed.
• 22:19
  But, and it comes to like individual decisions and
• 22:22
  relationships, you know, that sort of ideology I think
• 22:26
  ultimately leads to a lot of it fuels the brokenness it comes
• 22:30
  from. I agree.
• 22:32
  I'm not a fan of prenups. I don't have a dog in the fight
• 22:35
  to even talk about it. Too much of like, no, it's out
• 22:39
  always. We don't have that.
• 22:40
  I wouldn't entertain that. But I understand the
• 22:43
  apprehension that I I guess Zubi would have like, I, so I won't
• 22:47
  go out after him, 'cause I reckon I was like, all right,
• 22:50
  maybe a really Pretty Woman wonders, does he only really,
• 22:54
  does he? Does he love my soul?
• 22:58
  Or is it just the shell? Would, if I was on a wreck,
• 23:02
  would if my looks weren't here. Will he love me in 20 years or
• 23:07
  will he find someone younger? Well, what is he actually
• 23:10
  attracted to? And a woman could have that,
• 23:12
  that insecurity. And a man may have that of like,
• 23:16
  does she really love me? When I was poor, this type of
• 23:21
  woman never would have came near me.
• 23:23
  And now I'm rich and I'm seeing these, you know, babes at my
• 23:30
  beckon call wanting to marry. Is it me thereafter?
• 23:32
  Where were they before my wealth?
• 23:34
  And so you can, just like a woman could mistrust a man, a
• 23:37
  man could mistrust a woman for the exact same thing.
• 23:40
  And so the difficulty is, is how do you know?
• 23:43
  How do you trust? And it can be really difficult,
• 23:46
  especially if you get taken for a ride, You have somebody break
• 23:50
  your heart. And so I guess I want to throw a
• 23:55
  stone at the prenuptial idea, but at the exact same time, I
• 24:00
  actually have some pragmatic sympathy for that community.
• 24:04
  And so as such, I'm stuck between these kind of things and
• 24:07
  say I'm not doing the prenup thing, but there are some real
• 24:12
  challenges. You have to really, really know
• 24:15
  who you're after. I have a friend who was married
• 24:21
  and he had a couple kids and he married a certain woman.
• 24:25
  And then she got into New Age spirituality and that slipped
• 24:29
  her into the occult, which is, which is like bursting at the
• 24:33
  seams now of crystals and energy and whatever.
• 24:36
  And I think before she was done, she thought she was a white
• 24:39
  witch and they divorced and she was in favor of that divorce.
• 24:46
  And I'm like, what's this guy do?
• 24:48
  She she she's gone. So.
• 24:49
  You know, it's so sad. I've heard that story before
• 24:51
  myself, even in my, like, you know, social circles to some
• 24:55
  degree. You know, my background being
• 24:57
  raised, all the people I was raised with, you know, in the
• 24:59
  periphery. So you know, I do think New Age
• 25:02
  movement feminism stuff associated with it, like modern
• 25:06
  feminism and then the whole LGBT stuff, you know, you have, you
• 25:11
  have like, you know, women and men, I'm trans now in your own
• 25:14
  marriage. You know, they come out and they
• 25:16
  you just see this burgeoning of all of this dysfunction that's
• 25:20
  destroying relationships. And I understand why marriage
• 25:23
  might be so scary for some people, because they think they
• 25:26
  look at crazy, these crazy horror stories, and they're
• 25:29
  happening everywhere. That's good.
• 25:31
  So I guess if I didn't have a foundational anchor point to
• 25:36
  rest on, I think I would actually land more in the prenup
• 25:42
  and even the red pill camp 'cause those are actually quite
• 25:45
  strong arguments of this isn't worth the risk.
• 25:48
  How do I know that this girl I'm banking it all on is going to be
• 25:53
  anything like she is now? What if she just goes off and
• 25:56
  grows in this entirely different trajectory?
• 25:58
  I'm not the same man I was 10 years ago.
• 26:01
  I have grown, I have changed. My wife is not the same woman
• 26:04
  either. She has grown, she has changed.
• 26:06
  What's to say that we don't grow in opposite directions And then
• 26:10
  whereas we're great now in 15 years, we don't even like each
• 26:15
  other, we have nothing in common.
• 26:17
  What's to keep that from happening?
• 26:19
  And so for me, I can say, well, no prenuptial and none of these
• 26:26
  other protections. I'm going to bet it all and I
• 26:29
  have a a a very good likelihood, a reason to believe that I will
• 26:34
  be right and she will continue to grow and we won't grow at
• 26:38
  drift apart because we have a common faith, and without that
• 26:41
  nothing works. I'm not willing to make any bets
• 26:44
  now on this woman to spend my life with and to tie my fortunes
• 26:49
  to her and risk being taken and destroyed in the process unless
• 26:54
  we can agree on a few things. Now we're Christians, which
• 26:57
  means both of us have Jesus's our soul mates.
• 27:01
  And that means we're supposed to pursue Jesus forever.
• 27:05
  And as we pursue him, we get closer.
• 27:08
  So we have the same ultimate common goal, and we also have
• 27:11
  the same foundational value structure, which means, OK, in
• 27:16
  all things value, we're going to decide to go by the Bible, which
• 27:21
  gives us and informs us our sense of morality, right and
• 27:25
  wrong. And so, growing up on that value
• 27:28
  structure, we get more virtuous according to an agreed upon set
• 27:34
  and settled value and ethic, all becoming more and more like
• 27:39
  Jesus. And that makes a Safeway that a
• 27:41
  man and a woman can establish trust and future trajectory of
• 27:45
  growth that can end in a possible happily ever after.
• 27:49
  And it's with that assumption I can say for better or for worse,
• 27:54
  for richer, for poor, in sickness and in health.
• 27:58
  I'll love you forever, no matter what, 'cause there's something
• 28:01
  deeper than my pockets and something more glorious and
• 28:07
  beautiful than her good looks. It's good.
• 28:13
  I remember when we said our vows on our wedding day and the power
• 28:16
  of those words. You know, I I'm privileged to
• 28:19
  come from an intact family. My husband's from an intact
• 28:21
  family. So, you know, the sort of
• 28:23
  specter of divorce and all the brokenness, there's aspects of
• 28:26
  it in both of our extended families.
• 28:28
  But we, we had a lot of protection.
• 28:31
  And so those words were not as difficult maybe for us, you
• 28:35
  know, and I acknowledge that like that's that's a privilege
• 28:37
  that I have and I've been given. It's not my own virtue or
• 28:39
  anything like that. But I do have special respect
• 28:44
  for people who didn't have that privilege.
• 28:47
  You know, they come from that broken family, they come from
• 28:49
  that brokenness, and they still choose to go all in to say those
• 28:53
  vows to, you know, put the, you know, bet the house not so much
• 28:58
  even on the person in terms of, like, this person will never
• 29:01
  fail me, 'cause they will our spouses will we will fail our
• 29:04
  spouses, and they will fail us. But on God's provision that I'm
• 29:08
  gonna trust God in the way he has the plan for marriage here,
• 29:11
  knowing that there will be hardship ahead.
• 29:13
  Yeah, marriage really is a burn the ship's proposition, isn't
• 29:17
  it? Yeah, rightful, covenantal
• 29:20
  Christian marriage. And nobody does romance like
• 29:22
  Christians can. Jesus is the ultimate, yeah, the
• 29:25
  ultimate lover. But.
• 29:27
  I'll love you even if you get fat sick.
• 29:34
  You know you make me unhappy and we're crazy broke.
• 29:39
  I'm gonna love you even if I don't desire to.
• 29:42
  I'm choosing as a discipline to love you and act loving toward
• 29:48
  you forever. Beat that of like you can't.
• 29:54
  I'll I'll I'll die for you. I'll live for you.
• 29:56
  I I tie all of it to you, no matter what.
• 29:59
  It is the most romantic thing possible.
• 30:03
  It's also extremely difficult. But if you can grow to become a
• 30:10
  good enough person that is able to actually make good on that
• 30:15
  vow, you'll find the effort will reveal, after painful and
• 30:21
  difficult hard one years, the most beautiful thing this side
• 30:25
  of heaven you can achieve. So you've got your meat and your
• 30:28
  chicken. What about your coffee?
• 30:30
  We all drink it. Most of us drink it.
• 30:32
  We need our cup of coffee in the morning.
• 30:34
  Don't keep buying coffee from companies that don't support
• 30:37
  your values. In fact, groups like Starbucks
• 30:39
  are very hostile to our values. And also, this coffee is not
• 30:43
  that great. sevenweekscoffee.com is delicious coffee.
• 30:47
  Small batch, ethically roasted, low acid, make coffee.
• 30:51
  There's amazing blends that you can get from
• 30:53
  sevenweekscoffee.com and this is a company that not only makes
• 30:57
  delicious batches of coffee, but they are a pro-life company.
• 31:00
  They donate 10% of all of their proceeds, not just their
• 31:03
  profits. Back directly to pro-life
• 31:04
  Pregnancy Centers. So if you haven't already tried
• 31:07
  them, give it a shot. Go to sevenweekscoffee.com.
• 31:09
  You can join their Heartbeat Club, where you can get up to
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  25% off your first order using the code Lila.
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  And you can get an ongoing 15% off your subscription of coffee
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  Why is it called the Heartbeat Club?
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  Because did you know that when the baby's heart is beating in
• 31:26
  the first trimester, they are about the size of a Guess what,
• 31:29
  coffee bean? I love that.
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  How adorable is that? At 7 weeks is when the heart can
• 31:33
  be detected. So this little coffee bean, this
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  heartbeat club is representative of the lives that we care about
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  and are fighting for. So go to sevenweekscoffee.com
• 31:41
  today, put in your order for some deliciously small batched
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• 31:47
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• 31:48
  Check out at sevenweekscoffee.com for an
• 31:51
  additional 10% off your order. We haven't talked about this yet
• 31:54
  on the podcast, but what you're saying makes me think now would
• 31:57
  be a good time. Infidelity.
• 32:00
  You just talked about very difficult circumstances someone
• 32:03
  might go through. But I think arguably the most
• 32:07
  difficult is betrayal at its like, you know, deepest core and
• 32:12
  you know, I'm Catholic and we believe marriage is until death
• 32:16
  do you part. Now it's possible your marriage
• 32:19
  could be invalid. You married a narcissist.
• 32:20
  You didn't know he lied to you when you were married, and that
• 32:23
  might not even be a marriage. If there's abuse, you know, they
• 32:27
  actually can recommend legally separate to protect yourself.
• 32:31
  But you don't go and remarry. You know, these are hard
• 32:33
  teachings for a lot of people, really hard teachings.
• 32:36
  But even with infidelity, if there's infidelity, that doesn't
• 32:39
  mean you get to divorce and go remarry.
• 32:42
  Because then, as Jesus says in Holy Scripture, it's as if
• 32:45
  you're committing adultery to go and remarry.
• 32:48
  Your husband's still alive. Your husband's still alive
• 32:51
  exactly where your where. Your husband's like Jesus
• 32:54
  talking to the woman at the well, and he's not your husband
• 32:56
  either. And she probably had her
• 32:58
  stories. The woman at the well, like,
• 33:00
  well, he cheated on me. He was mean, you know, this was
• 33:02
  a bad guy, whatever. But the point is, it's one man,
• 33:06
  one woman for life until one or the other dies.
• 33:10
  Even when there's really bad stuff that might happen.
• 33:13
  So this always in the YouTube comment section, you know, and
• 33:16
  feedback that I get when we kind of tiptoe into these topics, I
• 33:20
  hear the stories, they start emerging, right?
• 33:22
  Like, well, are you telling me to stay with my abusive spouse?
• 33:24
  Like that is not Christian. That's not Jesus's plan.
• 33:27
  And I agree with that, by the way, because you know, in in
• 33:30
  abuse, you have to protect yourself, your dignity and often
• 33:33
  kids if they're involved. But that if it was a valid
• 33:37
  marriage, if it was, you went in to it with full knowledge, full
• 33:40
  consent. The person wasn't lying when
• 33:42
  they got married to you. You know, just kind of put out,
• 33:44
  just in casual terms here. Then even if they make a big
• 33:49
  mistake later on in the marriage and they fall and they cheat,
• 33:52
  that doesn't mean you walk away. That's right.
• 33:55
  What are your thoughts on that? So I think people can get real
• 33:58
  sucked into the painful circumstances that they're
• 34:02
  walking through or the stories that they miss God's purpose in
• 34:05
  marriage altogether. The Bible is a book that starts
• 34:08
  with a wedding, and it ends with a wedding.
• 34:11
  And so really, between those bookends, you understand that
• 34:15
  God has a very specific message in marriage.
• 34:21
  Jesus officiates the very first wedding with Adam and Eve.
• 34:25
  They're married, right? Revelation 19 is the marriage
• 34:29
  supper of the Lamb where Jesus is presented with his bride, the
• 34:32
  church where we collectively marry Jesus for all eternity to
• 34:36
  be his special bride. That's heaven.
• 34:39
  It's us being taken up and loved unconditionally with Jesus.
• 34:50
  You know, like that. That's our loving relationship
• 34:51
  for all eternity. And so that's the bookends of
• 34:55
  marriage now. And and what I understand in
• 34:59
  that because in between these bookends is just this terrible
• 35:03
  train wreck of broken evil, twisted humanity deserving the
• 35:11
  punishment of an infinitely holy God, But instead of God just
• 35:17
  wiping out says loathsome spiders in his sight, some
• 35:22
  people have a problem with that, 'cause you're like, Oh no,
• 35:24
  everyone's basically good, real quick and apologetic.
• 35:27
  If God is, If God is without beginning or end, God is by
• 35:32
  definition infinite, right? If God has any attribute, that
• 35:37
  attribute would also be infinite.
• 35:40
  Infinite, right? So if God is good, God is
• 35:44
  infinitely good. All right, So if we're just a
• 35:47
  little bit bad, how do we look in the eyes of infinite
• 35:49
  goodness, infinite vadnais? And now what I've done is just
• 35:53
  very easily and logically deduced our problem and it turns
• 35:58
  out that God is in fact holy, holy, holy right.
• 36:02
  And so God who is of pure eyes to look on evil, he cannot
• 36:06
  tolerate wrong and he will by no means clear the guilty.
• 36:08
  I just quoted 3 minor prophets back-to-back to back.
• 36:11
  So I'm pulling all that together for the good, systematic
• 36:14
  theology of that. But in the midst of our terribly
• 36:19
  depraved state, God is actually all about redemption.
• 36:22
  And so it's loving the unlovable, you know, And that's
• 36:26
  us. We're God loved us not because
• 36:27
  we're lovable, but God loved us because he's loving.
• 36:31
  And his plan is to redeem us. We see this really well, and
• 36:36
  it's in the context of marriage in the book of Hosea.
• 36:39
  It's a minor prophet of the Old Testament.
• 36:41
  Hosea is a priest and he's told to marry a prostitute.
• 36:47
  This is not Hosea's top pick. Probably wouldn't make his top
• 36:54
  3000 pick. This is a woman of ill repute
• 36:58
  and to him with his status and the way that society would have
• 37:02
  looked such. So down on prostitution at that
• 37:05
  time, this is terrible. And so he marries her obedient
• 37:08
  to God. And then what does she do?
• 37:10
  She cheats on him again and again, makes a public mockery of
• 37:14
  him. Everyone in town knows what's
• 37:16
  going on, and so God tells Hosea.
• 37:20
  No, no, no, don't send her away. Go and speak tenderly to her.
• 37:27
  Draw her out. Love her anyway.
• 37:29
  Redeem. It's wild and and that he should
• 37:32
  still be faithful to her even when she's unfaithful to him.
• 37:35
  And the roles, the gender, the sexes could be reversed here and
• 37:39
  and they they are often but that that high like that it it feels
• 37:45
  like for some I think an impossible standard well.
• 37:48
  Here we're still dealing with God's perception of us because
• 37:52
  it's kind of like some people would say, no, this actually
• 37:54
  happened. Other people, no, it's an
• 37:55
  allegory. It is a picture of us and God.
• 37:58
  So the story of Hosea don't read in and be like, well, this is
• 38:01
  social injustice and that no, God's trying to give a picture.
• 38:04
  And he's saying you are a you are prostitutes who have cheated
• 38:09
  on me, you know your husband. But instead of sending you away
• 38:15
  and giving you wrath and judgement, I'm going to continue
• 38:19
  to love you and redeem you. And so that's the picture of his
• 38:26
  covenantal marriage toward us. He could have sent us away
• 38:29
  judgement, but instead he redeemed us.
• 38:31
  Even though we are the prostitutes, we are the
• 38:34
  cheaters, we are the liars, we're the thieves, we're the
• 38:37
  adulterous people. And so that's the picture.
• 38:39
  And So what What marriage is now coming to us here, hearing us
• 38:44
  the best way that we can model the gospel to that person who
• 38:48
  has cheated on us. It is, you know the the
• 38:52
  redemption of of Jesus. Now you have an out.
• 38:55
  I I, I believe we we do have an out.
• 38:57
  Now you can send them away. But what would be incredible,
• 39:01
  my? And again, when I talk about,
• 39:04
  I'm Catholic, I believe, you know, Catholic is means
• 39:07
  universal Christian and the scripture, we share the same
• 39:11
  scripture largely I think as an evangelical.
• 39:13
  There's a few more books that we've got, you know, in the
• 39:16
  Catholic Bible that I thought were, you know, the initial
• 39:18
  Canon that Luther took out. But all that to say, we share
• 39:22
  the same largely scripture and the same foundation, I think.
• 39:25
  But there are many Protestant denominations that are OK with
• 39:28
  divorce in some cases, yeah. So Jesus even cites Moses who
• 39:36
  allowed them, allowed certain cases to send them away with
• 39:40
  certificate of divorce. And then he echoes that and he
• 39:43
  says you shouldn't divorce. But then there's an add on in
• 39:47
  the New Testament where except in the case of sexual
• 39:49
  immorality, it is like, it kind of puts it over here of like,
• 39:53
  you know, like in something grievous like that.
• 39:56
  Perhaps there is that biblical out.
• 39:58
  You could do that. But then he moves on and say,
• 40:00
  but this is not what it was meant for.
• 40:02
  This is not the same. This is not the picture of how
• 40:05
  Jesus marries us, He's redeeming us even though we cheated kind
• 40:08
  of thing. Now there's a story.
• 40:10
  And one quick thing. I want to hear the story, but
• 40:12
  there are different interpretations of what that
• 40:14
  means. The sexual immorality clause
• 40:16
  that Jesus references, because I think there's some
• 40:18
  interpretations, theologians who say, well, that's not so much
• 40:22
  about making a moral failure in a marriage and some form of
• 40:25
  cheating. And that means you can divorce
• 40:27
  and remarry. But that's talking more about is
• 40:29
  that when the marriage was happening, there was deception
• 40:32
  with regard to sex. And you know, there.
• 40:36
  So there's a lot of obviously theology that can go into that.
• 40:39
  We can get into that. But what you're saying and where
• 40:41
  I land and where I think the church lands is the IT is a hard
• 40:45
  teaching. It's a beautiful teaching, but
• 40:46
  it's a hard one that Even so, until death do you part.
• 40:51
  That's it. That's that's that's the thing I
• 40:55
  was trying. You're about to tell me a story,
• 40:58
  I interrupted you. So there's a older woman.
• 41:01
  My wife knows this this, this is not an anecdotal somewhere out
• 41:05
  there in the ether. This is someone my wife knows.
• 41:09
  This woman, old and years now, her husband decided he didn't
• 41:14
  want to be married to her anymore.
• 41:16
  And as a middle-aged woman he left, you know, kind of prodigal
• 41:20
  son, ran wild, slept around, went and lived his own life.
• 41:25
  Then she felt like the Lord was asking her to wait and pray for
• 41:29
  the man. And I think she prayed for 10
• 41:31
  years and somewhere in that, her husband who had gone off, had
• 41:40
  become a Christian. And they found each other again
• 41:45
  and remarried. And they spent their, you know,
• 41:49
  they, they spent the last chapters of their life together.
• 41:54
  And he didn't deserve what she gave.
• 41:58
  It was wild love, you know, of like that kind of commitment,
• 42:03
  that kind of resolve to just. But that story really impacted
• 42:10
  my wife and I because of like, what?
• 42:12
  What kind of long-suffering forgiveness.
• 42:16
  Wow. Wow.
• 42:19
  And the story of it it it just that is incredible.
• 42:24
  And it's a wonderful picture of how God loves us in in marriage.
• 42:30
  And so, you know, of course, you know, I don't think you should
• 42:34
  let a dude beat on you or anything else like that or, you
• 42:37
  know, mistreat you and cheat. You know, I'm just saying here's
• 42:43
  the meta narrative for what marriage is in the Bible, and
• 42:47
  it's really beautiful when it plays out.
• 42:48
  That's what I'm saying. The practicalities obviously get
• 42:51
  complex, very complex. You know, boundaries and
• 42:55
  protecting oneself and one's kids.
• 42:57
  Because again, you know I hear so many stories and I know
• 43:01
  personally people very dear to me who have been through the
• 43:04
  wringer in and out of marriage. But in marriage and so you know
• 43:09
  these things are always so delicate to talk about in sort
• 43:12
  of the way we're talking. But the principles do stand and
• 43:16
  that's where, you know, that's where the we're called to
• 43:20
  obviously strive to be our best, but also to have love and
• 43:23
  support and mercy for those around us who are maybe facing
• 43:27
  really difficult things. And to not Lord over, you know,
• 43:31
  if we're in a healthy place in our marriage, not be like, well,
• 43:34
  you know, look at you, not healthy, you know, 'cause we are
• 43:36
  not in their shoes and they're, you know, what they're going
• 43:38
  through. But still at the end of the day,
• 43:40
  the principles still stand and the teaching still stands.
• 43:44
  And then we do our best to love through the often suffering that
• 43:48
  can happen. You know, the world is broken.
• 43:50
  There is so much brokenness in this world and we all share a
• 43:54
  piece in it in different ways. It looks different for each of
• 43:56
  us. That's good cause yeah the in
• 44:00
  the gritty, raw, you know humanity that that that's tough.
• 44:05
  What I want to do is, and what I feel like I've done is lay out
• 44:09
  the idyllic beauty of what marriage is supposed to be.
• 44:13
  And I think, you know maybe there's there's some asterisks
• 44:18
  for us to be able to weigh in in the complexity of our certain
• 44:21
  situations. But the goal isn't of like, hey,
• 44:24
  the goal is, Jesus says be perfect.
• 44:27
  For I am perfect. You know that.
• 44:28
  That's the goal. I'm like, all right, well,
• 44:30
  there's the goal. Let's go ahead and say that.
• 44:32
  Let's be like that now. Then I start doing it and I
• 44:35
  immediately fail. Every year for Lent, I give up
• 44:38
  sin. Why'd you laugh?
• 44:41
  That's a good one. So anyway, I made it like an
• 44:44
  hour and a half year before last.
• 44:47
  I was pretty good. I was on A roll.
• 44:48
  That's a good. But then I I realized I was on A
• 44:51
  roll and pride kept and I totally fumble it.
• 44:53
  So anyway, I I struggle toward the impossible ideal.
• 44:58
  And so I I think. But that's love, right?
• 45:01
  That's love. Struggle towards struggle
• 45:04
  towards the good constantly, that infinite good for the other
• 45:08
  for ourselves in love of God. What I don't like is when we
• 45:12
  make the bar for getting rid of our spouse too low.
• 45:18
  See if like, well, he was abusive.
• 45:20
  I'm like he was. He beat you.
• 45:21
  I'm like, well, he was emotionally abusive.
• 45:24
  What does that mean? Yeah, what's that mean?
• 45:25
  Like he he yelled at me. We all no, there.
• 45:29
  There's no marriage where where someone didn't get you
• 45:32
  criticized me. And I bet you were emotionally
• 45:34
  abusive too. And what I don't want to do is I
• 45:37
  don't know their situation. Maybe he was, you know,
• 45:40
  psychopathically really emotionally abusive.
• 45:43
  It was toxic. It was terrible.
• 45:45
  It was horrible. But I I don't think of like, Oh
• 45:48
  well, abuse is in a way out and he's emotionally abusive.
• 45:53
  And now you get in a few fights, and now I have a I have a I'm
• 45:58
  gonna claim a biblical justification, and the Lord is
• 46:01
  on my Everyone's gonna get real spiritual during a.
• 46:03
  Divorce. Have you seen this happen?
• 46:05
  I've seen it. Happen too?
• 46:06
  Absolutely. But people get real spiritual in
• 46:08
  a divorce and. In the Christian world to
• 46:11
  justify. The Christian world and I, I I
• 46:13
  think it's the yeah. It's a dangerous space.
• 46:16
  God is on my side and they're actually have some deep
• 46:19
  personality issues and I'm. The victim and they're the
• 46:22
  aggressor. And I think that's the language
• 46:24
  we speak. And when you speak to the other
• 46:27
  side, they have a similar victimhood story and.
• 46:31
  Have you heard it? Have you heard that thing?
• 46:33
  Sorry to interrupt, but in kind of psycho in the psychology
• 46:36
  world, there's this idea in about family systems and that
• 46:40
  often the person that is, if multiple people aren't in
• 46:43
  therapy, in that family system, they've got these issues they're
• 46:45
  working on, the person who's actually not in therapy is the
• 46:48
  most broken or that has the most wounds.
• 46:51
  Have you heard this idea? I I mean, I find there's a lot
• 46:54
  of truth to it. Not saying it's always the case,
• 46:56
  but the person that's always saying they have all the issues,
• 47:00
  you know, they have the problem, they need to go to the therapy
• 47:02
  and like, I'm the victim or I'm just having to cope with this.
• 47:05
  And actually they often have a lot of issues.
• 47:08
  And again, this is not every case.
• 47:10
  You know, again, I think the comment section here might get,
• 47:13
  you know, heated because people have their experiences and, you
• 47:15
  know, every situation is going to be different.
• 47:17
  But I do think sometimes we throw these terms around too
• 47:21
  lightly. I think so too.
• 47:22
  I'm also difficult in that I'm a bit jaded on the experts.
• 47:27
  I'm like, well, hold on, who's the most unhealthy and what?
• 47:31
  What litmus test? Cause to me, a humanist
• 47:34
  psychologist is very unhealthy and they're deciding who's
• 47:39
  healthy. Especially if they think you
• 47:41
  should trans your kid. Yeah.
• 47:42
  Of like these are the experts that are.
• 47:44
  Where psychology has gone and psychiatry, there's it's gone
• 47:47
  some very dark places. Not all of it.
• 47:48
  There's still some really good stuff there, but it has gotten
• 47:50
  some dark places. So before I hook, line and
• 47:52
  sinker, agree with any anecdotal wisdom that may come, you know,
• 47:56
  from from wherever about health, I want to know who's deciding
• 48:01
  what is healthy, you know? But I I see a lot of experts of
• 48:04
  like, I think right now Jordan Peterson is up to possibly lose
• 48:08
  his license. I saw that.
• 48:10
  It's crazy. And I'm like, well, those are
• 48:12
  the people that are deciding what's healthy.
• 48:14
  But you know the origin story there.
• 48:15
  The reason that he's even on the chopping block to lose his
• 48:19
  license is because of his. My understanding is hateful
• 48:22
  rhetoric, not using preferred pronouns.
• 48:25
  I mean, that's where this whole controversy started that even
• 48:28
  put Jordan on this global map where now he's this advocate
• 48:31
  for, you know, good things. But he was, he got caught up in
• 48:34
  that culture where not, not, wasn't like his thing.
• 48:36
  It was that he just didn't want to live unreal, like unreality,
• 48:40
  like pretend that someone was a man when they were really a
• 48:42
  woman. He thought that wasn't good for
• 48:44
  their psychological health, you know, And he gets just lambasted
• 48:49
  for it and persecuted for it. Persecuted is the right word.
• 48:52
  Yeah, for me to hear. OK.
• 48:55
  The person not in therapy is the one that's most damaged.
• 48:58
  I'm like, well, of course they'd say that of like you get another
• 49:01
  customer, have them all grew up, bring them to me, I get more
• 49:05
  customers. Yeah, it can get weird.
• 49:07
  So I don't know have. You seen that movie Shutter
• 49:09
  Island? Yes.
• 49:11
  It's a horrible movie in my. Opinion.
• 49:12
  I'm a man, so I'm like, that was awesome.
• 49:15
  That's so funny. My father-in-law, we watched it
• 49:16
  over Christmas. My father-in-law was really into
• 49:18
  it. And so we watch it.
• 49:19
  And I Joe, I turned to Joe, up with him.
• 49:21
  I'm like, I think I'm gonna go to bed.
• 49:22
  This is dark stuff, but but it's that idea, right?
• 49:25
  Well, everyone's crazy except, like, everyone is going crazy
• 49:29
  and you're trying to keep your head about you.
• 49:31
  But then the crazy psychiatrist comes and says, actually you're
• 49:34
  the crazy one and we're gonna put you in the Infirmary and
• 49:39
  give you a lobotomy on top of it.
• 49:40
  I mean, there's elements of that happening today it.
• 49:43
  It's skepticism meets humanism, and it it the idea is is what is
• 49:49
  health, what is sanity, what is real?
• 49:52
  And all of it's lost amidst the the rising and falling waves of
• 49:59
  humanism. Again, we find ourselves adrift
• 50:02
  without an anchor point and a foundation.
• 50:04
  And again, I'm able to cling to this life raft called
• 50:08
  Christianity, where I'm like, Nope, this is what's real and
• 50:10
  this is what's good and this is what's noble and this is what's
• 50:12
  true. This is what's healthy and this
• 50:14
  is what's toxic and it's all set and done.
• 50:17
  And without that anchor point, everyone's adrift.
• 50:21
  And that's terrifying. And anyway, but it makes for a
• 50:25
  really good movie. That was real, real fun.
• 50:27
  It was so dark. It ended.
• 50:29
  So fun. For me, in in movies where
• 50:31
  there's scenes of violence against children, I just that's
• 50:34
  what is kind of the deal breaker for.
• 50:36
  Me. I don't remember any of that.
• 50:37
  I just remember funny. Final My father-in-law didn't
• 50:39
  remember the dark stuff either. He's like, it was an interesting
• 50:42
  plot twist, you know? That's all I remember.
• 50:44
  It's too long ago, so maybe I'd watch it again and be like John,
• 50:47
  what's wrong with you? This is a horrid and you just
• 50:50
  plugged it, so don't go see it. On a lot.
• 50:52
  Shutter Island it's Leonardo DiCaprio and he's on the insane
• 50:55
  asylum island. And then find you know, I'm.
• 50:57
  I'm no spoilers actually I'm giving the plot away.
• 51:00
  I'm not gonna. There's a fun plot twist, but it
• 51:01
  might be like a cancerous, toxic, awful movie.
• 51:04
  Maybe you should not see it, but many years ago when I saw it, I
• 51:07
  remember the cool plot twist. I'm like, this was cool.
• 51:11
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• 51:15
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• 52:02
  One other thing, we talked earlier about Red Pill, and I
• 52:04
  did want to ask you about this because with Warrior Poet, you
• 52:07
  know, you could say, well, you know, there's different defects
• 52:11
  of the warrior where he needs to be also the poet, and then
• 52:14
  there's different defects of the poet where he needs to also be
• 52:17
  the warrior. I'm just talking about kind of
• 52:18
  ideal masculinity and how you present it, which I love the way
• 52:21
  you talk about it. And today, you know, we talked
• 52:25
  about the beta male a little bit at the beginning.
• 52:28
  You know, there's the red Pill stuff and the issues there.
• 52:31
  And then you also have over here, like the men literally who
• 52:34
  think they're women. Now you have this huge rise in
• 52:38
  men and women identifying as LGBT, so a huge rise in men
• 52:45
  practicing homosexuality. There's always been homosexual
• 52:48
  tendencies among some people. Same sex attraction has always
• 52:51
  been. It's a historical fact, you
• 52:54
  know, different sexual attractions.
• 52:56
  I mean, people have all kinds of sexual attractions, right?
• 52:59
  But now we've sort of, we've built a political identity
• 53:01
  around those attractions, and there's also sort of the brand
• 53:06
  of man that is like the feminist man, you know who says there's a
• 53:11
  TikTok that went went viral recently.
• 53:13
  Was it a TikTok or was it a Reddit?
• 53:16
  Or maybe both, But anyways, both.
• 53:17
  Of those camps sound terrible. Well, the, the, the, the thrust
• 53:21
  of it was he was going to, he says, I'm a feminist man.
• 53:24
  He takes her on a date and he says, let's split the check,
• 53:27
  right. And it was like, how dare she
• 53:29
  not want to split the check? Yeah, What's your take on that
• 53:33
  stuff happening in society and what our response should be?
• 53:40
  I mean, it's, I don't know, it's all terrible.
• 53:43
  It's a train wreck. It's a train wreck.
• 53:45
  It's like, you know, you just kind of look at it, the cars
• 53:48
  piling up and going off the rails.
• 53:49
  And every once in a while you just go, oh, oh, that's awful.
• 53:53
  But you know, typically you just stand there, mouth open, gaping
• 53:59
  at this mess and say how did we get so far off the tracks 1
• 54:03
  little, divergent 50 years ago. And then this is the collateral
• 54:07
  damage. It it, it's something that talks
• 54:10
  about, it's something that preaches the danger of a
• 54:13
  singular ideal. I'm in the world of firearms and
• 54:17
  shooting and I know you have your front sight and your rear
• 54:20
  sight and what, a tiny little, just half a millimeter deviation
• 54:25
  of front sight and relatively to your rear sight doesn't have
• 54:29
  much of effect. Five feet away, 10, it's twice
• 54:34
  that. You know in 50 meters away what
• 54:37
  would have been a a near, near miss up close didn't come
• 54:41
  anywhere near to your target. And so it's the downrange
• 54:43
  effects. And so I think that's
• 54:45
  postmodernism in general. Postmodernism is
• 54:48
  deconstructionistic. It's to say truth is relative,
• 54:53
  morality is relative, and this is this is ideas that have been
• 54:58
  percolating for decades, mid 1900s.
• 55:01
  And this is in full swing. And the working out of that
• 55:05
  postmodern idea of moral relativism as truth of being
• 55:11
  relative is we continue to drift until men can menstruate.
• 55:16
  No, they can't. No, they can't.
• 55:18
  You're correct. But there's still tampons in the
• 55:20
  men's bathroom. The high school boys bathroom in
• 55:23
  Canada. That was the latest headline.
• 55:24
  They put a tampon dispenser in the high school boys bathroom
• 55:27
  and the boys took it down and put it in the toilet.
• 55:31
  Because we will never need, we will never need these tampons.
• 55:34
  But a woman who thinks she's a man might.
• 55:36
  Yeah, yeah, it it it's absurd. It's the theatre of the absurd.
• 55:41
  And we didn't just get there. These ideas have gone unchecked
• 55:46
  through academia. They've been supported through
• 55:50
  legislative decisions. They've been supported in media
• 55:53
  and Hollywood. And so this is a societal shift.
• 55:58
  It's a cultural movement that's built upon the idea that truth
• 56:03
  is, whatever you think it is, it's not what God says it is.
• 56:08
  It's not even like the Enlightenment thinker who would
• 56:10
  say let reason be our guide. Logic is now God, you know, Like
• 56:15
  it's not even anchored to something concrete.
• 56:17
  It's whatever you think relative.
• 56:21
  You say something, you say something different.
• 56:22
  You're both right. No dumb questions, no bad ideas.
• 56:26
  And so. Unless you're Jordan Peterson.
• 56:28
  That's. Right.
• 56:29
  Or you or me. Well, I mean we're just, we're
• 56:33
  just folks who are standing on millennia old wisdom that a
• 56:39
  thing is itself and it cannot be not itself.
• 56:42
  At the same time, it's just the old plain rules of logic, of
• 56:45
  identity, of non contradiction, of the excluded metal.
• 56:49
  It's that if if there is a moral law, there must be a moral law
• 56:55
  giver, right? You know, And if there is no
• 56:58
  moral law giver, a God that authorizes morality, there is no
• 57:02
  moral, no moral law. And that's what we find ourself
• 57:05
  with, completely without limits, without boundaries.
• 57:09
  We can redraw the fabric of reality as we see fit.
• 57:12
  Because relativism isn't. Who are you to say that someone
• 57:16
  else's take on reality isn't true?
• 57:18
  Who are you to say that raping small children and carving off
• 57:24
  their genitals is wrong, and you have no basis of morality to do
• 57:28
  it in? Everything's relative and that's
• 57:30
  what we're seeing, the outer fringes, so that the most
• 57:33
  deviant, sick, twisted people can get away with anything and
• 57:38
  we have no recourse against it. To say that is bad.
• 57:44
  Well said. One thing that makes me think
• 57:47
  about, too, with postmodernism, you know, you're talking the
• 57:49
  last few 100 years, right? And the Enlightenment and you
• 57:54
  know, you trace the history of philosophy and then the theology
• 57:57
  that was born from it that is broken.
• 58:00
  And you can see you can kind of build this case for how we got
• 58:02
  where we are today. And it's very complex and we're
• 58:05
  not going to do that project right now.
• 58:07
  But I think another aspect that I think about as a Catholic and
• 58:10
  here we are Catholic, Evangelical and we share this
• 58:12
  baseline of so much and I think Christianity Christendom shares
• 58:17
  the space line of so much but our division.
• 58:20
  So you know there's fifty they say there's you know thousands
• 58:23
  of denominations, right. Or different Christian churches.
• 58:26
  There's this division between you know, the there's Rome and
• 58:29
  then there's Protestantism and you have Orthodoxy.
• 58:31
  And I do think, I do think you know the Lord wanted us all to
• 58:35
  be one. And I wonder how much of this
• 58:39
  postmodern craze is at minimum enabled by or not as checked as
• 58:46
  it would be, because we don't have that shared unity in the
• 58:50
  Christian world of teaching, including on on faith and
• 58:54
  morals, especially on faith and morals.
• 58:57
  Maybe so. So I'm not thinking as much in
• 59:00
  denominational distinctions these days.
• 59:03
  That's not to say that I'm right.
• 59:04
  It's just to say, you know, I I used to think something more of
• 59:08
  Baptist and Methodist and I'm like that that was meaningful
• 59:11
  for me until I found out reading like even the 1860s Baptist
• 59:16
  faith and message versus something for the Methodist.
• 59:18
  I'm like the big the big difference was as one sprinkles
• 59:22
  water and the other wants to dunk you.
• 59:25
  That was the big difference. There's a few others.
• 59:28
  Ecclesiologically, there's some different differences on church
• 59:31
  structure and government, but by and large, the major bulk of
• 59:36
  theology amidst all the Protestant dominations, it is
• 59:39
  razor thin theological differences.
• 59:41
  Very, very small stuff. And it's open handed stuff.
• 59:44
  Stuff that doesn't like change your destination.
• 59:47
  It's still Jesus is the savior if like nothing big.
• 59:51
  So you know people can make too much of there's all these
• 59:56
  denominations and stuff. No.
• 59:58
  I think we're going to have theological differences that's
• 1:00:01
  always going to be around and we should work through those but I
• 1:00:05
  don't think as much of like all right we need this united front
• 1:00:08
  let's pull 1 denominate and we get everyone in.
• 1:00:11
  And and I, as idyllic as that is really I'm sorting out sheaves
• 1:00:16
  sheep from wolves. There is the early church.
• 1:00:18
  Father 5th century church. Father Augustine and he said
• 1:00:21
  there's many, you know wolves within.
• 1:00:26
  Speaking of the church, that's non believers play in church and
• 1:00:29
  there's many sheep without meaning believers that aren't in
• 1:00:33
  our congregation. And what I'm sorting the world
• 1:00:37
  into now more than all right Orthodox Pentecostal Lutheran.
• 1:00:44
  I'm like real loving follower of Jesus.
• 1:00:48
  I see the evidence in their lives and then not a follower of
• 1:00:53
  Jesus. Someone who plays church and
• 1:00:55
  they do churchy things and they may go there like no, no, no.
• 1:00:58
  Who is born again? Who does the Holy Spirit of God
• 1:01:03
  live in? Who?
• 1:01:05
  Who can I see has a changed life?
• 1:01:08
  And are they seeking obedience? That's it to the Lord.
• 1:01:11
  That's it. And so that's the camp.
• 1:01:13
  And under that banner we unite. Because those are actually the
• 1:01:16
  only people that you'll see in heaven, and not a single one of
• 1:01:19
  them will claim to be a Catholic or a Baptist.
• 1:01:21
  It's just those who were born again.
• 1:01:23
  Well, and Dante's Inferno, you had bishops everywhere, of
• 1:01:27
  course, So you and there might even be some popes,
• 1:01:29
  unfortunately. And there's certainly going to
• 1:01:31
  be all kinds of Christians in this life and you know, Lord
• 1:01:35
  help us that we can be faithful on this journey, right, that we
• 1:01:38
  are on. But I I'm thinking about
• 1:01:41
  particularly the 20th century though, when you had church
• 1:01:44
  authorities who had broken out from Roman rule, so to speak,
• 1:01:48
  you know, from from the from the papal rule and built their own
• 1:01:52
  authorities like the Anglican bishops right.
• 1:01:53
  Or you have the Presbyterians and they're sort of, you know,
• 1:01:58
  leadership structures and you have, you know them accepting
• 1:02:01
  contraception and then sometimes abortion and then you have gay
• 1:02:03
  marriage. And so now you have, you have
• 1:02:05
  these horrible, you know, videos that go viral right of the not
• 1:02:09
  not so much maybe the Anglican church, but maybe be a
• 1:02:11
  Presbyterian Church. But and you know, the the
• 1:02:14
  rainbow and it's it's one thing to have like a priest who gets
• 1:02:20
  caught in that, you know, homosexual activity and and is
• 1:02:23
  like promoting this and that's against the teaching, the
• 1:02:25
  official teaching. When the official teaching gets
• 1:02:27
  changed, you know, in a church, you know it's one thing to have
• 1:02:32
  like your your home Bible church and you have your official
• 1:02:34
  teachings, word of God, right. But then your official teaching
• 1:02:37
  says on abortion, we are not going to take the hard line.
• 1:02:40
  And you see that among some of these mainstream mainline
• 1:02:44
  Protestant denominations. And so I'm speaking more to that
• 1:02:46
  where you have this, this diffusion of what it even means,
• 1:02:49
  what Christian morality even means, and how do we how do we
• 1:02:53
  respond to that? Sorry, can you clarify the
• 1:02:59
  question? Well, you have this, this
• 1:03:02
  diffusion of what it means, morality even means among
• 1:03:04
  Christians. And so now even Christians are
• 1:03:06
  debating and saying you can be pro-choice in a Christian, you
• 1:03:09
  can be pro gay marriage in a Christian, you can be, you know,
• 1:03:12
  sympathetic to trans people, let them live the way they are.
• 1:03:15
  God designed them that way and say that they're a Christian.
• 1:03:18
  What does it even mean to be a Christian?
• 1:03:20
  Yeah, it it's a good point. I know Presbyterianism is split
• 1:03:25
  into PCA in USA and USA. Is the the woke gender weird
• 1:03:30
  stuff that it has nothing to do with Christianity anymore?
• 1:03:33
  It's not Christian. It's something else, something
• 1:03:35
  nuts. It's this syncretistic version
• 1:03:39
  of whatever is going on culturally and what they would
• 1:03:43
  like to read into the Bible, but it's just not there.
• 1:03:47
  And then then there's the PCA, which has held more of the
• 1:03:52
  traditional Presbyterian line. And so I see denominations
• 1:03:56
  splitting. It just happened with the
• 1:03:57
  Methodist Church and the church down the street, which used to
• 1:04:00
  say First United Methodist, now just reads United Methodist.
• 1:04:05
  They just took the First off. That's gone and so.
• 1:04:08
  Or maybe they took United off in anyway.
• 1:04:11
  It'd be more apropos to remove the United, but anyway that
• 1:04:13
  changed because there was a denominational split amidst all
• 1:04:17
  this woke whatever stuff. But I see two dangers.
• 1:04:20
  One is you could ecclesiologically put some
• 1:04:22
  General Assembly or a Pope or something over that so that you
• 1:04:26
  could kind of keep all these things in line, hit them with a
• 1:04:29
  theological hammer and be like, Nope, you guys are out and we're
• 1:04:32
  holding this line. That's what we do in the
• 1:04:33
  Catholic space. I know and that's worked that
• 1:04:36
  that. 2000 years so far. Yeah, but you're not batting
• 1:04:40
  1000 in those 2000 years of like, 'cause you had.
• 1:04:43
  Faith and morals we are and 'cause we're not batting 1000 in
• 1:04:45
  practice, 'cause there's centers everywhere in our church, but
• 1:04:48
  the gates of hell have not prevailed on the teaching like
• 1:04:50
  the Church. The Catholic Church has never
• 1:04:52
  come out for abortion. The Catholic Church has never
• 1:04:54
  come out for, you know, same sex marriage.
• 1:04:56
  And it won't. You know, I think that that's
• 1:04:58
  the that is more, I think what I'm speaking to in terms of
• 1:05:01
  unity around certain moralrealitieseverylife.com is
• 1:05:05
  America's pro-life diaper company.
• 1:05:07
  I love every life because you have these great products that
• 1:05:09
  are ethically sourced, these great diapers and wipes, and
• 1:05:12
  it's from a pro-life company, a company that actually supports
• 1:05:14
  your values. Did you know that companies like
• 1:05:16
  Huggies and Pampers actually support abortion?
• 1:05:19
  They help pay for abortion or they're pro abortion.
• 1:05:21
  This is horrible. That's why I love every life.
• 1:05:23
  They're a pro-life company that has great products where when
• 1:05:26
  you support every life and you buy from every Life and your
• 1:05:29
  diapers and wipes are delivered right to your door, you are also
• 1:05:31
  helping fuel the pro-life movement.
• 1:05:33
  Every Life is a proud supporter of groups like Live Action, your
• 1:05:36
  very own pro-life organization, and other pro-life groups.
• 1:05:39
  They donate diapers and wipes to pregnancy resource centers and
• 1:05:42
  mothers in need, and it's a wonderful organization led by
• 1:05:45
  wonderful people. Check out everylife.com today,
• 1:05:47
  order your diapers and wipes, and support America's pro-life
• 1:05:50
  Diaper company. That's why I love what you're
• 1:05:52
  doing with your channel, because you are teaching morality, but
• 1:05:57
  in a way that is really accessible and modeling,
• 1:06:00
  modeling it for people. Because so many of the role
• 1:06:03
  models today for both men and women, you know, are there's so
• 1:06:06
  much damage that's being being perpetuated, is there?
• 1:06:12
  What? What?
• 1:06:13
  What do you think? What would be kind of if there's
• 1:06:15
  someone listening, a guy that's listening?
• 1:06:16
  We have a lot of women who listen to the show, but we
• 1:06:18
  definitely have men who listen to.
• 1:06:20
  What would be your advice for them?
• 1:06:22
  If they are? Maybe they have some of these,
• 1:06:27
  let's say, red pill, you know, sympathies, which are very
• 1:06:30
  understandable when it comes to the brokenness and the culture
• 1:06:33
  and the betrayals and everything else.
• 1:06:35
  But they want ultimately what you have got.
• 1:06:38
  It so one is not everything they're pursuing is bad.
• 1:06:42
  It's actually some of it is worthy and it's good and you
• 1:06:46
  need to latch onto that and keep doing it of like when they'd say
• 1:06:49
  like, hey man, suck it up and do some push ups and hey, be
• 1:06:53
  disciplined and get out in the workplace and earn and hustle.
• 1:06:58
  That's awesome. You should totally do that.
• 1:07:00
  Absolutely awesome. But understand that a life lived
• 1:07:05
  completely for yourself. You want to be top G Know that
• 1:07:10
  you're going to lead a vain and empty life.
• 1:07:14
  You think it's cool up front. You think that the, you know,
• 1:07:19
  those Bugattis are going to somehow bring some of the most
• 1:07:22
  miserable people I've ever met are are are are very wealthy.
• 1:07:26
  I've also met deeply impoverished people, very
• 1:07:29
  unhappy. And so it looks like wealth is
• 1:07:32
  neutral. If you're impoverished, you're
• 1:07:34
  obsessed with money because you must pay bills.
• 1:07:37
  If you're wildly wealthy, you're probably obsessed with money
• 1:07:40
  because you've been worshipping it as God and it's somewhere in
• 1:07:42
  there. Just I don't want to have to
• 1:07:44
  worry about my bills and I can pay them and then find something
• 1:07:48
  more noble in life. There's something in between
• 1:07:51
  those bookends that the red pill movement is completely missing
• 1:07:56
  and on your deathbed. And I know it's hard for a 25
• 1:07:59
  year old kid to actually do the the work, the philosophical
• 1:08:03
  work, to picture themselves one day very old.
• 1:08:07
  What you'll The only thing you'll care about is what you
• 1:08:10
  did with your life that mattered.
• 1:08:12
  How much you gave away, what great causes that you put above
• 1:08:18
  yourself and devoted yourself to you.
• 1:08:20
  And then you'll look around the room and you'll see kids and
• 1:08:25
  grandkids and your wife, or the room will be empty.
• 1:08:31
  And all of that will be based on what you do right now.
• 1:08:36
  And I'm telling you, that red Pill movement leads to a wasted
• 1:08:42
  life. You'll be rich.
• 1:08:44
  You'll be jacked, You'll have some fun sleeping around for a
• 1:08:49
  little while, but you will likely die miserable alone.
• 1:08:53
  And that sounds harsh, but I'm right, and unfortunately the
• 1:08:57
  only way to be sure that I am is to just keep going the way you
• 1:09:00
  are. And in 20-30 forty years, I
• 1:09:04
  won't be around to say I told you so, but I won't really want
• 1:09:08
  to anyway. What about women?
• 1:09:11
  What's your advice for women? In what respect?
• 1:09:15
  In the respect of we're talking Red Pill adjacent, but women who
• 1:09:19
  want to reject feminism and they want to be traditional, but
• 1:09:24
  they're also wanting to, you know, they they're working,
• 1:09:29
  they're getting an education, they're they're active, maybe
• 1:09:32
  they're hoping to get married. And I think there's this pull
• 1:09:35
  between the traditional sort of thing that we've been handed of
• 1:09:38
  like stay at home, mom, you know, submit to a husband, all
• 1:09:41
  of this, But then also being educated, you know, having the
• 1:09:45
  experience to work, all of these things.
• 1:09:47
  Everyone's called to be educated, but that's completely
• 1:09:51
  different than schooling. So some gals will go off, spend
• 1:09:54
  their best years chasing a master's degree.
• 1:09:58
  She'll pay huge amounts of money for that, and the hope is, is
• 1:10:01
  that she will be educated. I'm like, well, a lot of the
• 1:10:05
  universities. You don't get education anymore.
• 1:10:08
  You become completely stupid, filled with copious amounts of
• 1:10:12
  propaganda and worthless degrees that you'll be paying on for 20
• 1:10:15
  years. It's not going to help you.
• 1:10:17
  So don't confuse schooling for education.
• 1:10:20
  Those used to be the same thing, and now they're it's almost
• 1:10:24
  assuredly opposite things. Schooling may or may not be
• 1:10:27
  education, but education it's My wife is constantly reading books
• 1:10:31
  and growing. She's never stopped becoming
• 1:10:34
  more and more educated. So a woman should do that.
• 1:10:37
  But the feminist lie that you need to go out.
• 1:10:39
  You need to get multiple degrees.
• 1:10:41
  You need to get us some high paying job and you can be a boss
• 1:10:44
  babe and have all that you ever wanted and you'll be the perfect
• 1:10:48
  mom with a you know your trophy husband who I don't know it's
• 1:10:54
  going to wear you out. I.
• 1:10:57
  Mean. Probably unattainable for most,
• 1:11:01
  if not all. It's not just that you're
• 1:11:03
  unattainable. It's that you're undesired.
• 1:11:06
  Meaning this captain S of industry.
• 1:11:12
  I don't want to try to marry her.
• 1:11:14
  It's not that I'm not good enough for it.
• 1:11:16
  So she don't have room for me. And and I see what she values.
• 1:11:20
  I see what she works for. It looks like she's in
• 1:11:24
  competition with me as if I'm. I'm trying to be the provider
• 1:11:28
  here. But she's like hold by beer.
• 1:11:29
  I'll provide even better than you and she might and I don't
• 1:11:32
  want to. As a man of like I, I wouldn't
• 1:11:35
  want to marry a woman that was the breadwinner any more than
• 1:11:41
  I'd want her to have a bigger bench press than me.
• 1:11:45
  Or a beard. Or a beard.
• 1:11:47
  You know you feel like an arm wrestle you down, but.
• 1:11:49
  You're not saying that it's somehow wrong or bad for women
• 1:11:52
  to be able to make money or that they're successful in making
• 1:11:54
  money. It's more that.
• 1:11:55
  No, go ahead. I'm saying most men won't be
• 1:11:57
  attracted. To you're not looking for that
• 1:11:59
  as a man, money in a woman who is, you know, some career woman.
• 1:12:04
  They're looking for a wife and a mother.
• 1:12:06
  That's it. And so some some folk, some
• 1:12:09
  women will hear what I just said and really hate it.
• 1:12:13
  She was like how dare you cause whatever.
• 1:12:15
  And that's chauvinistic and that sexist.
• 1:12:16
  I'm like hello. I'm just saying what I
• 1:12:20
  personally am attracted to and what I happen to know other men,
• 1:12:25
  many other men are attracted to. Now there's some of like, they
• 1:12:28
  don't care. And and they'd be quick to say
• 1:12:30
  of like, oh, you're insecure in that you don't want her to
• 1:12:34
  outperform you in that. No, no, I get that.
• 1:12:37
  My wife is brilliant and capable.
• 1:12:40
  I'm not questioning her ability to climb a corporate ladder and
• 1:12:44
  do well. And even, you know, I'll provide
• 1:12:47
  me. In which case, hey, it all goes
• 1:12:49
  to the family. It's not my insecurities
• 1:12:51
  speaking there. I'm like, yeah, money is great.
• 1:12:53
  It's what you value. Clearly.
• 1:12:55
  You value your money and climb more then a kid.
• 1:13:01
  I want a mom who wants to raise our own children, not give them
• 1:13:05
  to the public education system and see how that goes.
• 1:13:10
  I don't want them to, you know, give our kids to a daycare
• 1:13:14
  worker who's rate, who's spending eight hours a day with
• 1:13:17
  them. I want, I want my kids to be
• 1:13:19
  raised by their mom and I want to come home and enter into that
• 1:13:24
  safe, healthy world and participate.
• 1:13:27
  That's what I'm after. It's just the very traditional
• 1:13:30
  model, and I think it there's something wired into a woman
• 1:13:34
  that really is going to be most happy, nurturing and being part
• 1:13:39
  of a living, growing, vibrant family.
• 1:13:41
  It's it's tucked in there amidst the lies and the compulsion of
• 1:13:45
  the feministic rhetoric. A woman gets 35 years old and
• 1:13:50
  realized, I'm old, I don't have kids, and they grab some dude,
• 1:13:52
  somebody that's safe and easy. They have a few kids and you
• 1:13:57
  know, maybe she doesn't really respect him and she's able to
• 1:14:01
  dominate him and he turns into a shadow of the man he should
• 1:14:04
  because he's just emotionally outlasted by her.
• 1:14:07
  And their family starts to break up and she's trying to woman and
• 1:14:10
  charge this up and it's just a bleak kind of a bummer deal and
• 1:14:16
  dudes don't respond well to that And and you can scream against
• 1:14:20
  it and be like, I think men are awful for that and you're like
• 1:14:22
  you can say whatever you want but that's how dudes are.
• 1:14:25
  We would like to protect and provide.
• 1:14:27
  And a feminist doesn't understand that.
• 1:14:29
  In your competition to be a man, you may garner our respect, but
• 1:14:36
  you won't captivate us. You you won't captivate us.
• 1:14:41
  Like, good job. Yeah, good job.
• 1:14:42
  She's hard worker. She's super smart.
• 1:14:45
  She's beating me. Way to go.
• 1:14:47
  Big thumbs, up. Way to go.
• 1:14:49
  High 5:00. But that doesn't captivate us
• 1:14:54
  again. My wife is not like me.
• 1:14:58
  She's strong in areas that I'm just weak in and vice versa.
• 1:15:02
  Some of that's personality, some of that's just aptitude, some of
• 1:15:05
  that, but some of that's just how we're built.
• 1:15:08
  She's a woman and she's built differently than me and I'm a
• 1:15:11
  man and I'm built differently than her.
• 1:15:13
  And it works best when I'm the protector provider.
• 1:15:16
  I major on that. She minors on it.
• 1:15:18
  She's a protector provider as well.
• 1:15:20
  I'm the I major on it and she minors on it.
• 1:15:22
  She's a nurturer. She majors on that.
• 1:15:25
  I'm a nurturer but I'm minor on that.
• 1:15:27
  I'm going to help. I'm going to nurture.
• 1:15:29
  I'm going to love. I'm not as good at it as her but
• 1:15:31
  I have my own fatherly way to do that And so we're both doing all
• 1:15:34
  the roles but we major on different aspects.
• 1:15:38
  You know I I here is the home and I'm kind of pulling.
• 1:15:41
  I'm bringing home the bacon and providing a safe space and and
• 1:15:45
  and and I've got this house and I got this and she is the one
• 1:15:49
  that enters into the house brings children in and makes it
• 1:15:52
  actual home. She makes the house worth coming
• 1:15:55
  home to, and the two of us as a team completely or very
• 1:16:01
  different. Pulling together can make this
• 1:16:05
  really glorious partnership that flourishes children.
• 1:16:12
  Good stuff. It's AI like the major minor way
• 1:16:17
  of way that you put that. Thanks, because it acknowledges
• 1:16:20
  that there are primary roles, but there's also just life.
• 1:16:24
  And yes, some women, you know, in my household, my husband in
• 1:16:29
  some ways is more tidy than me in, you know, in some aspects
• 1:16:32
  I'm able to bring in some income, you know, and into our
• 1:16:34
  family. So there's there's this mix.
• 1:16:37
  But at the same time, there is the primary core of He is the
• 1:16:40
  lead. And I am the lead mom.
• 1:16:43
  I'm, I'm the only mom. And it's a beautiful, it's a
• 1:16:46
  beautiful symbiotic relationship that God designed that when we
• 1:16:50
  try to totally throw it out the window, things go haywire.
• 1:16:53
  Yeah, I think so. John, where can people find your
• 1:16:56
  work and your book? Sure.
• 1:16:57
  If you check out Warrior poetsociety.com, that'll have
• 1:17:02
  our book, our streaming service, a bunch of warrior poet kind of
• 1:17:05
  merch and apparel that helps kind of fund our movement.
• 1:17:08
  But we're on YouTube and the social medias.
• 1:17:11
  If you can find us behind the censorship and shadow banning,
• 1:17:14
  we're there on X But. Awesome.
• 1:17:17
  Thanks for coming on the podcast.
• 1:17:18
  Thanks for having me on. Thanks for listening to this
• 1:17:22
  episode of the Lila Rose Podcast.
• 1:17:24
  As always, don't forget to subscribe if you aren't
• 1:17:25
  subscribed already. If you're watching on YouTube,
• 1:17:28
  make sure you actually subscribe and then hit that notification
• 1:17:30
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• 1:17:33
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• 1:17:35
  We're growing our community there and that's where you can
• 1:17:37
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• 1:17:40
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• 1:17:42
  reach more people. Thanks so much and we'll see you
• 1:17:45
  next time.