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Messy Advice... | Busy Hearts Need Rest Too · Neighbourly: Real Stories of Care and Community

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  This one's for anyone who's ever stared at an unread text notification and
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  thought, I'll love them tomorrow. Let's be
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  honest. There's a difference between caring deeply and being constantly
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  available, and a lot of us are confusing the two. We've
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  all had that day off, the one where we'd swore we'd rest
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  and then said yes to helping someone move, mediating a group chat
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  conflict, and dropping off a pie we didn't bake. Suddenly,
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  your soul care day or Sabbath looks suspiciously like another shift.
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  Welcome to Messy Advice for People Who Care, a summer series from
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  Journey with Care for anyone who loves deeply and occasionally fantasizes
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  about becoming unreachable. We're talking about caregiving,
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  boundaries, burnout, and the not so clear moments of loving it
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  as well, minus the formulas. This is
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  Johan on the edge of helpful, offering wisdom for when your soul needs
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  rest and your inbox needs deleting. Hey.
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  If you've ever wondered whether you're allowed to take a break from caring,
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  this one's for you. Here's the question we're gonna address today.
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  I love people, but I'm exhausted.
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  Does stepping back mean that I've stopped caring?
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  That's a brave question and, honestly, one I wish more of us
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  would ask before hitting our limit. According to a
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  2023 survey by the Canadian Center for Caregiving
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  Excellence, forty seven percent of caregivers reported
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  feeling tired, forty four percent felt worried or anxious,
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  and thirty seven percent felt overwhelmed due to their caregiving
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  responsibilities. So if you ever found yourself emotionally
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  drained just thinking about another quick favor, you're in
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  good company. It's not just you. It's a shared experience among
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  other caregivers. But you see, exhaustion isn't
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  failure. It's feedback. And let's talk about what
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  that feedback is trying to say. Just because you care
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  doesn't mean you're on call twenty four seven. That's not
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  compassion. That's customer service. Picture
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  this. You've got one quiet evening ahead,
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  a hot drink, a show you're looking to finish, then
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  the phone buzzes. Hey. Sorry. Last minute. I know, but
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  could you dot dot dot. Your brain screams
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  no, and your heart whispers maybe,
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  and your fingers type, of course.
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  And suddenly, you're back in the game, resentful,
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  tired, and still trying to be holy.
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  Let's take a look at this passage in Luke five fifteen
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  to 16. Let's get biblical.
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  Biblical. By this point in Luke's gospel, Jesus's
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  reputation is exploding. Crowds are
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  gathering. People are bringing their sick. They're hurting. They're desperate.
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  He's in high demand for healing, for teaching, for hope.
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  Like, back in the day, forget Taylor Swift. This is Jesus we're talking
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  about. And in verse 16, we get this little line that almost
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  feels like a whisper in scripture, But Jesus often
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  withdrew to lonely places and prayed. Not
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  once, not after he finished everything on his
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  list, but often. He didn't
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  vanish out of frustration. He didn't burn out and disappear.
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  He stepped away intentionally, prayerfully,
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  even while people were still waiting. And
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  that's huge because some of us feel like stepping
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  back is only allowed after everyone else is okay.
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  But Jesus showed us a different rhythm, one where rest
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  isn't earned. It's part of obedience, where love doesn't
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  mean endless access, and faithfulness includes quiet
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  places. Jesus didn't ghost people, and
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  he didn't let their needs dictate his life and calling either
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  because even perfect love had patterns of
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  pause to reconnect his soul with God,
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  to get that refueling. And if Jesus needed space to
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  breathe, pray, and be alone, we probably
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  do too. So if you're tired, maybe the most
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  faithful thing you could do is rest. Not because you don't
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  care, but because you do, Deep care without
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  rest eventually turns into resentment, and we don't want
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  that. So take a step back. Take a
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  breath. Love will still be there when you return.
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  And, hey, if this resonated with you, you're not the only one trying to love
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  without collapsing. Give yourself permission to
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  pause. And if you got a messy question about
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  caregiving, compassion fatigue, or your inner urge to
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  escape to the mountains, join us on our Care Impact
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  Facebook group, bunch of like minded individuals there. We're we're
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  asking the same questions. And until next time, keep loving,
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  keep laughing, and if you need to go off grid, at least charge your
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  phone first and stay curious.