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Matthew Chapter 17: Bible Study by Atheists · Sacrilegious Discourse - Bible Study for Atheists

• 0:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Husband, wife, do you know what we're doing today?
• 0:03
  [SPEAKER_01]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
• 0:29
  [SPEAKER_01]: You did.
• 0:30
  [SPEAKER_01]: You just won.
• 0:30
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
• 0:31
  [SPEAKER_01]: Can you just take the win?
• 0:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 0:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: You take the win.
• 0:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'll take the win.
• 0:35
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 0:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: Next time.
• 0:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'll be back to normal.
• 0:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 0:39
  [SPEAKER_01]: All right.
• 0:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: So last time we did a regular episode, not a Q&A.
• 0:45
  [SPEAKER_01]: We read and I just lost my place.
• 0:50
  [SPEAKER_01]: We read Matthew chapter 16.
• 0:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sure, it's fucking.
• 0:53
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 0:54
  [SPEAKER_01]: And in that episode, the Pharisees and the Sadducees wanted Jesus to perform miracles in front of him, and he's like, fuck off.
• 1:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: He was.
• 1:02
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 1:03
  [SPEAKER_01]: And then,
• 1:05
  [SPEAKER_01]: He told Peter, he was the rock and he's going to build his church on or something.
• 1:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: And that could mean a couple different things as we found out in the Q&A.
• 1:14
  [SPEAKER_01]: But then he called him Satan.
• 1:15
  [SPEAKER_01]: Peter is a rock.
• 1:17
  [SPEAKER_01]: So that was a dramatic chapter around.
• 1:20
  [SPEAKER_01]: And then Jesus predicted his own death.
• 1:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, that's all.
• 1:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's all.
• 1:23
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, nothing big.
• 1:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it was a hinge chapter.
• 1:26
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, we're with the tone totally changed.
• 1:29
  [SPEAKER_01]: The now we have prophecies about things that are going to happen in the fucking book that we're reading.
• 1:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, now it's a race towards his death and coming back to life.
• 1:39
  [SPEAKER_01]: Which I'm like, okay, this is getting
• 1:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: weird.
• 1:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: It's getting weird.
• 1:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: It is.
• 1:45
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 1:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 1:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: I, you know how I try really hard not to read the, the headers because they're like spoilers.
• 1:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: This one's the transfiguration.
• 1:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm like, this sounds like a transformer.
• 2:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: What are we doing here?
• 2:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: What is happening right now?
• 2:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 2:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't, I don't know what that word means.
• 2:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: Hopefully we will learn what that word means.
• 2:10
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 2:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 2:12
  [SPEAKER_01]: Transformer or transfer your transfer your transfer your okay.
• 2:16
  [SPEAKER_01]: Transmeers double checking.
• 2:17
  [SPEAKER_01]: Anyway, that was Matthew chapter 16.
• 2:19
  [SPEAKER_01]: She's that was, which means that today we're doing.
• 2:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Little Matty chapter 17.
• 2:25
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, right.
• 2:26
  [SPEAKER_01]: Let's do this.
• 2:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, okay.
• 2:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: All right, we are helping in to Little Maddie, Chapter 17.
• 2:38
  [SPEAKER_01]: All right.
• 2:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I forgot to specify in the opening that this little subsection we're doing chapters 17 and 18 before we then do a Q&A.
• 2:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: So we're doing two chapters and then we'll do a break again before we figure out our next little session.
• 2:59
  [SPEAKER_01]: I just have to comment real quick.
• 3:02
  [SPEAKER_01]: Since we've started this podcast six years ago, every time that you say the word section, I want to say from the back section, because of the PC boys, like literally every time.
• 3:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then I guess I'm action, from the back section.
• 3:14
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, like literally that crosses my mind every single podcast.
• 3:17
  [SPEAKER_01]: I do.
• 3:17
  [SPEAKER_01]: And I do.
• 3:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: I never find a good way to work in the thought that's going through my head.
• 3:21
  [SPEAKER_01]: So I just felt the need after six years to say it.
• 3:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: I say it all the time.
• 3:25
  [SPEAKER_01]: So I just said it.
• 3:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: I do, I've done it on this podcast.
• 3:28
  [SPEAKER_01]: Why, why don't you make, you may be right, but I just, I, you may be right.
• 3:31
  [SPEAKER_01]: Because it was my reign yet again.
• 3:34
  [SPEAKER_01]: I felt the need to say it again.
• 3:35
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, need to say it.
• 3:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, there's always room for the BC boys in this house.
• 3:40
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 3:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: All right.
• 3:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: So we're going to read about transfiguration apparently, whatever the fuck that is.
• 3:46
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 3:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: And we're going to do it.
• 3:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 3:49
  [SPEAKER_01]: Great.
• 3:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: Are you ready?
• 3:50
  [SPEAKER_01]: I'm ready.
• 3:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 3:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 3:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 3:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Jesus took with him Peter James and John the brother of James and led them guys Hup a high mountain by themselves.
• 4:05
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 4:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: So Peter James and John not the Baptist.
• 4:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 4:10
  [SPEAKER_01]: So just those guys and they were also by themselves.
• 4:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 4:13
  [SPEAKER_01]: Got it.
• 4:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: It was a circle church.
• 4:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, okay, it wasn't, but I had to say it because I just felt right.
• 4:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 4:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm sorry.
• 4:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: I make everything into a sex joke.
• 4:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: I am a child.
• 4:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry, sorry.
• 4:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry, sorry.
• 4:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 4:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: There he was.
• 4:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Transfigured before them, okay?
• 4:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 4:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Just so you know that happened.
• 4:32
  [SPEAKER_01]: I don't.
• 4:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: He was transfigured.
• 4:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 4:35
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 4:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um.
• 4:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: His face shone like the sun.
• 4:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: And his clothes became as white as the light.
• 4:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, that's a song.
• 4:59
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I know it's a song.
• 5:00
  [SPEAKER_01]: Well, why?
• 5:02
  [SPEAKER_01]: Why now?
• 5:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: Why are you trying like this song?
• 5:05
  [SPEAKER_01]: I'll shine like this song.
• 5:06
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 5:06
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 5:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I just face showing like the sun.
• 5:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: I got it.
• 5:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: I got it.
• 5:10
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 5:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: And there's always, I mean, when you hear her, you, you see her, got it.
• 5:19
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right?
• 5:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: I can't remember her name.
• 5:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: I heard your girlfriend.
• 5:23
  [SPEAKER_01]: Is she?
• 5:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 5:24
  [SPEAKER_01]: I don't remember who it is.
• 5:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, never mind.
• 5:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: We'll get there.
• 5:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 5:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'll look it up later.
• 5:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 5:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: And they'll be like, Oh, she is my girlfriend.
• 5:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: Anyway, so he's like turning into a transformer and just then they're appeared before them Moses and a line job.
• 5:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: Wow.
• 5:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Talking with Jesus, what the fuck?
• 5:44
  [SPEAKER_01]: Let me share a crow and share a crow.
• 5:46
  [SPEAKER_01]: She is.
• 5:46
  [SPEAKER_01]: She's your girlfriend.
• 5:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, okay, share a crow.
• 5:49
  [SPEAKER_01]: Thanks, friend.
• 5:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 5:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, okay.
• 5:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm so sorry.
• 5:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: I I was not invited to this tea party with Moses and Elijah.
• 5:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: I did not know that OTE characters were coming into the sequel.
• 6:04
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 6:04
  [SPEAKER_01]: I didn't need it.
• 6:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: I know what he told me this happened.
• 6:07
  [SPEAKER_01]: Why do they only take three people?
• 6:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: This feels a little old.
• 6:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, he took the ones most likely to keep the secret that it did happen.
• 6:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: hold on.
• 6:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: So there appear before them Moses and Elijah.
• 6:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: They're just like, what?
• 6:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: We're sitting on a mountain.
• 6:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: What?
• 6:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is what we do.
• 6:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: We just appear sometimes.
• 6:25
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 6:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm sorry, like my mind is blown.
• 6:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: What the fuck is this?
• 6:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: What are we reading right now?
• 6:31
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I don't know.
• 6:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is a manifesto.
• 6:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 6:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is ridiculous.
• 6:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: Peter, you know, the rock.
• 6:36
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 6:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: Said Jesus, it also satin.
• 6:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 6:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Said to Jesus, Lord, oh, also Simon.
• 6:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: Simon, call Peter.
• 6:45
  [SPEAKER_01]: Simon, call Peter, call Satan.
• 6:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 6:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: Simon, call Peter, call Satan.
• 6:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's hard to say.
• 6:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Pick Peter.
• 6:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, so anyway, Rocky said to Jesus, Lord, it is good for us to be up here.
• 6:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: Woof!
• 6:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you wish, I will put up three shelters, one for you.
• 7:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: One for Moses and one for Elijah.
• 7:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because I'll be building all the fucking tents, go see the tents.
• 7:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.
• 7:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: What are you?
• 7:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Transfigure?
• 7:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: How long have I stayed up on this fountain?
• 7:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know.
• 7:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: He glow in.
• 7:14
  [SPEAKER_01]: Is it like when they brought the 10th payments, they can be up there for like 40 days?
• 7:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then drop it.
• 7:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then go back up and get another one.
• 7:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 7:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: While he was still speaking, oh wait, who's speaking?
• 7:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, while Rocky Peter Satan was still speaking, a bright cloud covered them and a voice from the cloud said, this is my son.
• 7:34
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, shit, God's there too.
• 7:36
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah, this is like everybody.
• 7:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, damn, this is the tea party of the century.
• 7:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: I need, I need this, I need these action figures.
• 7:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: I need this table.
• 7:50
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh my God.
• 7:51
  [SPEAKER_01]: I'm so, I'm so excited.
• 7:53
  [SPEAKER_01]: This is like the crossover in the comic series.
• 7:58
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 7:58
  [SPEAKER_01]: I'm bringing them all together.
• 7:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yes.
• 8:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 8:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is, this, this.
• 8:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 8:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm sorry.
• 8:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: I cannot possibly take this seriously because this is so silly.
• 8:07
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh yeah.
• 8:08
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 8:08
  [SPEAKER_01]: No, I'm sorry.
• 8:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: We have, we have two dead people.
• 8:12
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay, listen, listen.
• 8:13
  [SPEAKER_01]: One seemed to be dead person and then God, who also Jesus is breaking a lot of his laws.
• 8:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: And then we also have Peter, who's also Satan, who's also Simon, who's also Simon.
• 8:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is like if, if, um, rainbow bright.
• 8:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: gotten to a fight with the care bears over who was the best rainbow.
• 8:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then they all rode off on my little ponies.
• 8:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like that's what this is like in my brain, just like nothing makes sense.
• 8:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: These worlds should not be colliding the way they are.
• 8:48
  [SPEAKER_01]: And their shit was infected with
• 8:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: I love the glow worms.
• 8:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: I never had one.
• 8:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: I always wanted one.
• 8:57
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, we had glow worms.
• 8:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're so lucky.
• 9:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: I always thought it was such a clever idea because, you know, it's like a nightlight, but it, you know, it's your, it's too close.
• 9:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's too close.
• 9:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's too close.
• 9:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's too close.
• 9:07
  [SPEAKER_01]: It's too close.
• 9:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 9:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: I wonder if they still make those.
• 9:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: If they make those, can we get me a glow worm?
• 9:13
  [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.
• 9:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want a glow worm.
• 9:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: I never had one.
• 9:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: I feel like I need one of those.
• 9:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm never had an etchist cat.
• 9:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, I had an etchist cat, a light bright.
• 9:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: That's why I've never had a light bright.
• 9:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, my sister did.
• 9:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: She got one.
• 9:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't get one.
• 9:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: I had, you know how like your parents, if they get you one expensive toy, that's not to be shared, then they get a different expensive toy for the other kid.
• 9:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: See I your parents didn't do that.
• 9:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, we just shared all of our toys.
• 9:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 9:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, my parents couldn't do that with me and my sister because my sister would mess everything up.
• 9:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: She like everything was a mess and I more wanted books and toys.
• 9:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: So she would get something and then I would get something and then sometimes we would trade because they got it wrong.
• 10:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like they gave me the blue one and her the pink one and
• 10:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: Hello, I want to pink one.
• 10:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm the pink girl.
• 10:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: She's the blue girl.
• 10:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 10:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Other times both were lame and then sometimes like my sister got that light bright and that was amazing
• 10:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: But I'm doing some heavy lifting for a like right.
• 10:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, it had all those little fucking Christmas light things that you Yeah, no, I I had it.
• 10:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, listen listen.
• 10:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know then what I know now, which is that I have OCD okay
• 10:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: and the thought of being able to plug in all those little lights and make all these little designs.
• 10:48
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 10:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like that is enthralling.
• 10:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if you've looked at my desk and the way I line up my pens and markers and gel pens and stuff like my felt tips like I have them.
• 11:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: I have them in those containers that are like
• 11:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, like a waterfall cascade and like the colors like they're separated by color.
• 11:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god like I would have I would have been a really happy kid with a light bright.
• 11:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: I see.
• 11:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: I feel like I feel like it's not fair.
• 11:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm 50 years old and I shouldn't be talking like this, but I cannot help it.
• 11:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: I just want to buy another rock I'm sock I'm robots at.
• 11:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, I don't want that.
• 11:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: That was my favorite.
• 11:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't ever want that that when we used to play with like Oh, the library would play with that with you.
• 11:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: That would be fun now.
• 11:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just about it.
• 11:44
  [SPEAKER_01]: I love the rock.
• 11:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm so Oh my god.
• 11:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 11:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want if we if we give me a library and a glow warm I will play rock.
• 11:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm talking with you.
• 11:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: That sounds so fun.
• 11:54
  [SPEAKER_01]: That sounds like a plan.
• 11:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 11:56
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 11:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 11:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: I should probably read the Bible now.
• 11:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah.
• 11:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 11:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry, sorry, sorry.
• 12:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 12:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: Anyway, God is talking to the tea party.
• 12:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 12:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is my son whom I love with him.
• 12:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: I am well pleased.
• 12:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Listen to him.
• 12:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 12:15
  [SPEAKER_01]: You three people.
• 12:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right?
• 12:17
  [SPEAKER_01]: A two of whom are brothers.
• 12:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yafax.
• 12:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: When the disciples heard this, the three disciples, but not all the nine ones that he left behind, he was the three that he put with them.
• 12:28
  [SPEAKER_01]: Couldn't have any witnesses to you.
• 12:30
  [SPEAKER_01]: Do you need to keep the, if you're gonna have a huge lie, you need to keep the circle small.
• 12:35
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 12:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: When the disciples heard this, they fell face down to the ground terrified because never not be afraid, don't forget.
• 12:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right, allegedly.
• 12:44
  [SPEAKER_01]: Allegedly.
• 12:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Allegedly.
• 12:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: But Jesus came and touched them.
• 12:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know, he said, don't be afraid.
• 12:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, wait a minute, wait a minute.
• 12:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm sorry, I read the Old Testament.
• 12:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: Y'all weigh very much wants you to be afraid.
• 12:57
  [SPEAKER_01]: Just to bring out one of our fan favorites, who's a, come on.
• 13:01
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 13:01
  [SPEAKER_01]: Fucking struck him dead.
• 13:02
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 13:03
  [SPEAKER_01]: You know, yeah.
• 13:04
  [SPEAKER_01]: Just for friends.
• 13:05
  [SPEAKER_01]: Just for trying to catch the goddamn mark.
• 13:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: And not when they hit the ground.
• 13:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 13:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then one of Aaron's own sons got smoked for doing something wrong in a long day with, didn't they both get smoked?
• 13:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, a couple of his kids did.
• 13:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then he wasn't even allowed to cry over it.
• 13:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 13:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 13:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Fucking bullshit.
• 13:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Don't be afraid.
• 13:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Have you, have you met Y'all weigh his scary?
• 13:24
  [SPEAKER_01]: And then, what was that one kind of, was it her whole, her, I don't know what happened to it, but he only lived for like three days or something, and it was like, and then it's just said her or died.
• 13:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: And that was like, that was had for her.
• 13:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, listen, you always a scary fuck, okay?
• 13:39
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 13:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: Never not be afraid of him.
• 13:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 13:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: So Jesus is wrong.
• 13:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm just here to put that out there.
• 13:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 13:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Jesus does not know what the fuck he's talking about.
• 13:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: When he says, don't be afraid.
• 13:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: He is mistaken.
• 13:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Do be afraid.
• 13:51
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 13:51
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 13:52
  [SPEAKER_01]: Like God, you're here.
• 13:53
  [SPEAKER_01]: Can we get it like a... Can you please correct your kid?
• 13:56
  [SPEAKER_01]: Crabberate his message.
• 13:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: He's doing a Neppo baby.
• 13:59
  [SPEAKER_01]: I'd like to hear from you.
• 14:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: I need the big bus.
• 14:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, okay, listen.
• 14:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just realized when I was doing my notes to something that really fucking perturbs me.
• 14:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 14:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Did you know that when we talk all through the old fucking testament about God, we don't capitalize the age when we talk about him.
• 14:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: I hated this and him did that and his socks and his butt and his stinky toes and whatever, whatever, whatever.
• 14:27
  [SPEAKER_01]: We can't remember if we're referring to God.
• 14:28
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, okay.
• 14:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: We don't capitalize that.
• 14:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Guess what?
• 14:31
  [SPEAKER_01]: What?
• 14:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: Jesus does.
• 14:34
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, damn.
• 14:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 14:36
  [SPEAKER_01]: See if I was God, that'd be a little salty right.
• 14:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't understand that.
• 14:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: That, I mean, Jesus gets red ink.
• 14:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: He gets a capital pronoun like what the ever-loving fuck is happening here.
• 14:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: He gets to be like, change all the rules.
• 14:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Don't be afraid.
• 14:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm the big one now.
• 14:54
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 14:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, you're the child.
• 14:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Shut the fuck up.
• 14:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sit down and drink your tea with Moses.
• 14:58
  [SPEAKER_01]: Maybe God was retiring.
• 15:00
  [SPEAKER_01]: You know, like maybe he's passing this job along like he's like, you know, I've been in charge for like why it's been like 3,000 years now I want to watch what I want to do something else, you know Remember Lucifer?
• 15:14
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I do.
• 15:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: That was such a good show.
• 15:16
  [SPEAKER_01]: It still is a good show.
• 15:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: I want to watch it again.
• 15:20
  [SPEAKER_01]: Speaking of which, we came, I came in the other day.
• 15:24
  [SPEAKER_01]: And kid was watching supernatural just out of nowhere.
• 15:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, everyone's not a kid just possession one random thing.
• 15:29
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it was so fantastic because it was like, because kid always watches the highlight real shows, because we've seen, we've seen the whole fucking show three times now, I think.
• 15:38
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 15:39
  [SPEAKER_01]: And so, and kid knows, like,
• 15:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: every episode.
• 15:42
  [SPEAKER_01]: Every episode.
• 15:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: Every fucking episode.
• 15:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: At this point, like you can walk in the room and demon walk across the screen and we'll be like, Oh, is this that episode where he scared of the dog?
• 15:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's what it was.
• 15:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's the episode.
• 15:57
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, I love this one.
• 15:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 15:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, is this the one where they're dead?
• 16:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: He's a gym teacher and he pulls his pants down and goes,
• 16:06
  [SPEAKER_01]: You know, it's just kind of nice to have one of those shows that you're just like, oh, yeah.
• 16:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: That's a good one.
• 16:10
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 16:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 16:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: And that's, that's, that's ours.
• 16:13
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 16:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry.
• 16:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry.
• 16:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: Anyway.
• 16:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's just, okay, this book is throwing me out.
• 16:19
  [SPEAKER_01]: So that's why this fucking chapter is insane.
• 16:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is silly.
• 16:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: Sorry, sorry, but yeah.
• 16:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: I know, that's why I keep going off topic because I can't take this seriously, okay.
• 16:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: Anyway, so he's like, don't be scared.
• 16:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's fine.
• 16:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's fine.
• 16:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: Just, you know, several thousand years of beat, do be afraid, and now what?
• 16:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: Don't just stop.
• 16:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: Because you know, Jesus.
• 16:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: But I'm not changing anything.
• 16:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: Everything's the same.
• 16:40
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 16:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, so when they looked up,
• 16:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: They still don't know when except Jesus, well, where's God?
• 16:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: As they were coming down the mountain, when he come, they'll be coming around the mountain.
• 16:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, as they were coming down the mountain, Jesus, why?
• 16:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Don't you like it when it first came to the song?
• 17:03
  [SPEAKER_01]: When you were actually read the sentence, I realized that you were going to read that, then you started seeing the fucking song.
• 17:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: So that's why I'm laughing because I did it so well.
• 17:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because I'm also Okay, so as we're coming down the mountain.
• 17:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, yes, Jesus instructed them
• 17:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Don't tell anyone, this is killing me until the son of man has been raised from the dead.
• 17:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Remember how I told you I'm going to die?
• 17:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and this is the other thing that changed with regard to the old terminology.
• 17:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: Like you could have taken Son of Man to mean many things prior to chapter 16, which was the last chapter.
• 17:42
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 17:42
  [SPEAKER_01]: And now all of a sudden Son of Man is definitely Jesus.
• 17:45
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 17:46
  [SPEAKER_01]: It's definitely Jesus.
• 17:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: We've never not been talking about that.
• 17:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: What do you mean?
• 17:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: What?
• 17:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like, what the fuck?
• 17:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: We've always not been afraid of y'all way.
• 17:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: What do you talk?
• 17:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: His name's not y'all way.
• 17:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: What are you talking about?
• 17:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's God.
• 17:58
  [SPEAKER_01]: It's like they were setting this up for a trick, you know, a trick.
• 18:01
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 18:02
  [SPEAKER_01]: It's the one we're going to talk about.
• 18:03
  [SPEAKER_01]: And then bam, it's Jesus, guys.
• 18:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, look, Christianity is trying to fucking gas like me into believing that this is the way it's always been.
• 18:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: I read the Old Testament y'all.
• 18:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: It was not like this.
• 18:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: I will not be gas lit, do not.
• 18:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 18:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: The disciples asked him, um, um, okay.
• 18:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: When you stayed on Tony, until the son of Man and he's moving, um, why then do the teachers of the law say that Elijah must come first?
• 18:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: What's that about?
• 18:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 18:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: That was a prophecy.
• 18:39
  [SPEAKER_01]: Also what happened to John the Baptist, because a lot of people think he was, but I
• 18:42
  [SPEAKER_01]: right?
• 18:42
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 18:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: And he was just up on the mountain, right?
• 18:45
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 18:46
  [SPEAKER_01]: What happened to them?
• 18:47
  [SPEAKER_01]: They they just showed up, but then when when they looked up, what they looked up, they got with Connor.
• 18:54
  [SPEAKER_01]: So did nobody actually see Moses in Elijah and John and God?
• 18:57
  [SPEAKER_01]: I don't.
• 18:57
  [SPEAKER_01]: I don't.
• 18:58
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't fucking.
• 18:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, they saw Moses and Elijah, but then they looked down when Jesus started going in the dark from radiation poisoning.
• 19:08
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 19:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: And
• 19:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: While they were like down on the ground, that's when God was like, yo yo yo, what up, this my boy.
• 19:17
  [SPEAKER_01]: Well, first of all, God, okay, God did talk to people on the Old Testament, sort of sometimes, maybe that's questionable.
• 19:25
  [SPEAKER_01]: Kissed by like, there's a lot of...
• 19:28
  [SPEAKER_01]: God's voice can't actually be heard so like this is there's a lot of there's not a weird shit here Anyway, sorry.
• 19:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't know So so okay, so while they're looking down God's like yo yo, right?
• 19:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and so then Jesus is like oh, you don't have to look down.
• 19:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's fine.
• 19:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 19:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: Don't be afraid.
• 19:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: So then when they look back up There is no God because God is Jesus right so there is a God.
• 19:54
  [SPEAKER_01]: It's just Jesus now.
• 19:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah
• 19:58
  [SPEAKER_01]: I feel like maybe Jesus just learned how to throw his voice really well.
• 20:03
  [SPEAKER_01]: This was like the original badass ventriloquist.
• 20:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: That was the magic scene right there.
• 20:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: That was it.
• 20:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 20:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: Where the only thing missing is the fucking dove.
• 20:12
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 20:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then we could be like Trinity.
• 20:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: Seriously, that was it and whatever happened to Moses and Elijah, we don't know they were too freaked out They disappeared in a puff of smoke like okay.
• 20:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know Jesus so they're like wait, why then do the teachers of the law say that Elijah must come first?
• 20:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah
• 20:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: And Jesus replied in red ink, to be sure Elijah comes and will restore all things.
• 20:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: But I tell you, Elijah has already come and they did not recognize him, but have done to him, everything they wished in the same way the son of man is going to suffer at their hands.
• 20:53
  [SPEAKER_01]: So he is actually referring to maybe John the Baptist.
• 20:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: He is saying that John the Baptist was the
• 21:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: reincarnated Elijah or whatever.
• 21:02
  [SPEAKER_01]: So what's up with him showing up here on top of this fucking mountain?
• 21:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because, well, John the Baptist is dead.
• 21:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can't inhabit the body of a headless man.
• 21:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's not like he's nearly headless, Nick.
• 21:15
  [SPEAKER_01]: So we're bringing back the OG Elijah.
• 21:17
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 21:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: For purposes of ghost.
• 21:20
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 21:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, man, it was this it was this whole fucking thing just to set up him being superimposed over God Like literally they're like you're tired.
• 21:32
  [SPEAKER_01]: He's got now and God's not so much God I was thinking and she how would he find no what you were seeing and I was ignoring it going on with the podcast
• 21:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: All right, yeah, that's what I'm saying.
• 21:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: That was the magic moment.
• 21:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: That was when, and now we have Christianity because Jesus, this does not feel good, and I hate it.
• 21:56
  [SPEAKER_01]: All right, yeah, especially the small crowd that witnessed it.
• 22:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's like, the might as well have said it, and then they spread butter all over his body and rolled him in thumbtacks.
• 22:06
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, he knows fine.
• 22:07
  [SPEAKER_01]: He knows fine.
• 22:08
  [SPEAKER_01]: That's fine.
• 22:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: He wasn't on top of that mountain.
• 22:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: Matthew.
• 22:12
  [SPEAKER_01]: You know who wrote this book?
• 22:14
  [SPEAKER_01]: People who talked to Matthew.
• 22:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right, right, right, right.
• 22:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: So you didn't like my buttered and buttered and rolled in thumbtacks?
• 22:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: No.
• 22:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Why?
• 22:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: I thought it was creepy.
• 22:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, sorry, go on.
• 22:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, Matthew wasn't there.
• 22:29
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 22:30
  [SPEAKER_01]: Matthew didn't witness it.
• 22:32
  [SPEAKER_01]: So we're hearing about this from the Cyples of Matthew.
• 22:36
  [SPEAKER_01]: who was part of the disciples slash apostles of Jesus, who the people that went up on the mountain with Jesus to witness this thing happen, more as opposed to tell anybody, including Matthew.
• 22:48
  [SPEAKER_01]: And that's how we're getting this story.
• 22:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 22:51
  [SPEAKER_01]: I'm just, you know, hey, do you, how does that make any fucking sense check?
• 22:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, it doesn't.
• 22:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 22:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then the disciples understood that he was talking to them about John the Baptist.
• 23:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Says right there.
• 23:01
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 23:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 23:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 23:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: So the New Testament has confirmed.
• 23:04
  [SPEAKER_01]: That's great.
• 23:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: John the Baptist is like that.
• 23:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 23:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: That happened.
• 23:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 23:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: At least according to Jesus.
• 23:10
  [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.
• 23:10
  [SPEAKER_01]: One of Matthew according to Matthew's disciples.
• 23:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: As long as we're making shit up, hey, yeah.
• 23:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: When they came to the crowd, we're in a new little section now.
• 23:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: They're done with the numbers themselves.
• 23:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: They're coming down the mountain when they come.
• 23:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Remember?
• 23:24
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I got it.
• 23:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, when they came to the crowd, a man approached Jesus, again, you know, we're in the crowd now, so everybody needs help, right?
• 23:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 23:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: And not before him.
• 23:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: Lord, have mercy on my son, he said, he has seizures and is suffering greatly.
• 23:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: He often falls into the fire or into the water.
• 23:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, shit.
• 23:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: I brought him to your disciples, but they could not hear along.
• 23:48
  [SPEAKER_01]: He didn't give them good magic powers.
• 23:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: You know how magic isn't real, so they couldn't hear along.
• 23:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: That was a thing.
• 23:56
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay?
• 23:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, and then Jesus is like, he's so perturbed, okay?
• 24:03
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 24:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: Listen, listen, in his red ink he goes, you unbelieving and perverse generation.
• 24:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: How long shall I stay with you?
• 24:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: How long shall I put up with you?
• 24:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Being a boy hits in me.
• 24:25
  [SPEAKER_01]: Wait a second, hold on a second here.
• 24:28
  [SPEAKER_01]: He's put out by this person being an unbelieving person nation, whatever the fuck he's saying.
• 24:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: It sounds to me like the guy's like, no, I totally believe that's why I'm bringing him to you.
• 24:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 24:39
  [SPEAKER_01]: But if Jesus believes that this guy is not a
• 24:42
  [SPEAKER_01]: solid believer or whatever.
• 24:44
  [SPEAKER_01]: Why is he even entertaining the idea of healing his son?
• 24:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 24:48
  [SPEAKER_01]: Because he doesn't heal people that don't fully believe.
• 24:53
  [SPEAKER_01]: So I don't understand this.
• 24:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 24:56
  [SPEAKER_01]: This isn't really track with what he's done so far.
• 25:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's silly, it's silly.
• 25:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, anyway.
• 25:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay, so clearly because this boy has seizures, that means he's got a demon out of him.
• 25:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right, obviously.
• 25:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: So Jesus, that's what seizures mean.
• 25:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: That, well, I mean, because the next line we get, Jesus rebuked the demon and I'm like, oh, so there was a demon to be rebuked.
• 25:19
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 25:20
  [SPEAKER_01]: It couldn't possibly be anything medical.
• 25:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, Jesus rebuked the demon and it came out of the boy.
• 25:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: And he was healed at that moment.
• 25:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sorry, pro none of you.
• 25:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, the boy was healed.
• 25:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 25:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then the disciples came to Jesus and private and asked, oh, dude, we couldn't weed drive it out.
• 25:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, why couldn't you?
• 25:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because magic isn't real.
• 25:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: He replied, in red, because you have so little faith.
• 25:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's true.
• 25:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, remember last time when I was telling you about mustard seed back?
• 26:01
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, okay.
• 26:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Remember, mama, fucking mustard seed.
• 26:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain move from here to there.
• 26:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: And in a move, when you have magic,
• 26:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: they let you do it.
• 26:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can grab them by the pussy.
• 26:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Nothing will be impossible for you.
• 26:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: Mountain's move.
• 26:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: Duh.
• 26:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: Stupid.
• 26:24
  [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.
• 26:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 26:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 26:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is, this is, I hate this so much.
• 26:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 26:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Next section.
• 26:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Ready?
• 26:31
  [SPEAKER_01]: I'm ready.
• 26:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: When they came together in Galilee, he said to them, in his red ink, so you know it really happened.
• 26:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.
• 26:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: The song of man is going to be delivered into the hands of men.
• 26:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, he's doing more of, on my dice soon, hang tight, hold on to your butts.
• 26:45
  [SPEAKER_01]: I like, you know, we talked about the correlations between Jesus and Trump.
• 26:51
  [SPEAKER_01]: He even refers to himself in third person.
• 26:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, oh my god, he does.
• 26:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: The son of man who is, you know, me.
• 27:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, right.
• 27:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: The son of man Trump is going to be delivered into the hands of men, they will kill on him.
• 27:08
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 27:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: And on the third day, he will be raised to life.
• 27:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Somebody over there who isn't me.
• 27:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: What?
• 27:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: No.
• 27:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is so weird.
• 27:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: And the disciples were filled with grief.
• 27:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: I would have been filled with something, but it wouldn't have been grief.
• 27:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: I can tell you that.
• 27:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: It would have been like,
• 27:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm not fucking as hyper anymore right now.
• 27:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: Can we go home?
• 27:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is stupid.
• 27:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Alright, next section.
• 27:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.
• 27:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
• 27:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: After Jesus and his disciples arrived in Capernaum, the collectors of the two drock-muck temple tax, came to Peter and asked Peter the Rock.
• 27:45
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 27:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: Doesn't your teacher pay the temple tax?
• 27:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: Um, excuse you, your tab is due.
• 27:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: for payment, okay?
• 27:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: He's like, y'all's taxes is due and you need to pay out.
• 27:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, he does rocky reply.
• 28:03
  [SPEAKER_00]: When Peter the Rock Satan who used to be Simon came into the house, Jesus was the first to speak in his special red ink.
• 28:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: What do you think Simon?
• 28:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: He asked,
• 28:16
  [SPEAKER_01]: What do you call him Simon here?
• 28:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: He called him Simon there.
• 28:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: That's weird.
• 28:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's a good thing that I remembered that he Simon called Peter.
• 28:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right.
• 28:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: And I've been only doing that because I didn't want to forget.
• 28:25
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 28:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's weird.
• 28:27
  [SPEAKER_01]: It is.
• 28:28
  [SPEAKER_01]: Why do these switchbacks assignment?
• 28:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know.
• 28:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: I bet it comes up in our Q&A.
• 28:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: Why I'm definitely curious, you see?
• 28:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, Jesus is like, you'll Simon, what do you think?
• 28:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: From whom do the kings of the earth collect duty and taxes, he said duty, from their own children or from others?
• 28:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: From others, Peter the Rock Simon Satan said.
• 28:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then the children are exempt.
• 28:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Jesus said to him in running, but so that we may not cause a fence, go to the lake and throw out your line, take the first tissue catch, open it's mouth, and you will find a four-druck McQueen.
• 29:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's magical.
• 29:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: Wow.
• 29:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: Trump makes coins, too.
• 29:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: He does.
• 29:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh my God.
• 29:13
  [SPEAKER_01]: For a mere $12,000, one could be yours.
• 29:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: I wonder if you pose the coins out of the reflecting lake, Pond Pool.
• 29:21
  [SPEAKER_01]: I bet he does it's just a hypothesis I have work in here.
• 29:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, yeah, remember that time we were just watching that news and he called it the reflecting lake instead of the reflecting pond or the
• 29:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: you some say some say oh so you fucked up okay got it some say no nobody says right okay so he's like anyways go catch some fish there's gonna be magical coins in it just like Trump and you will find a four-druck McCoy and take it and give it to them for my taxes and yours the end.
• 29:56
  [SPEAKER_01]: Wow I wish I could pay taxes like that.
• 29:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, he's like, he's like, actually, from, from, from, actually, we don't owe this tax, but we'll just go ahead and pay it anyways.
• 30:07
  [SPEAKER_01]: What have we fixed down the reflecting pool pay for it?
• 30:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 30:11
  [UNKNOWN]: Yeah.
• 30:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: So he's like, I actually don't owe this tax, whatever.
• 30:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then he's like, Sure, if any still pay it.
• 30:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Just to keep the piece though, let's go ahead and pay it anyways.
• 30:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: Well, why would, why would he keep the piece?
• 30:24
  [SPEAKER_01]: He's been such a, he doesn't counter.
• 30:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: He's gonna be a rebel rouser like he's been.
• 30:29
  [SPEAKER_01]: That's what I'm saying though.
• 30:30
  [SPEAKER_01]: This makes no sense.
• 30:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: This makes no sense.
• 30:32
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 30:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: Don't tell anybody, even though everybody knows by now and I'm about to get my head chopped off or what the fuck ever.
• 30:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 30:39
  [SPEAKER_01]: We all obviously end up knowing this stuff.
• 30:42
  [SPEAKER_01]: Why do we know that he talked to Moses Elijah and God on top of that mountain?
• 30:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: This chapter was a goof.
• 30:52
  [SPEAKER_01]: I did not like it.
• 30:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: I hated it.
• 30:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: I hated it because look, I wanted to just be, oh, Jesus, what a pretty story.
• 31:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yay, like I was looking for like, peaches, roses, and sunshine and butterflies.
• 31:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: And like Jesus, my little pony, kibba, kent down, Jesus is so magical.
• 31:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: He's a love, peace, sky.
• 31:16
  [SPEAKER_01]: I have a working theory.
• 31:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: I think that.
• 31:19
  [SPEAKER_01]: a lot of Christians probably based their faith out for about approximately 10 or less versus from the Bible.
• 31:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: And those are the ones that they know.
• 31:27
  [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, don't you agree?
• 31:29
  [SPEAKER_01]: They have to.
• 31:30
  [SPEAKER_01]: They have to.
• 31:31
  [SPEAKER_01]: Like it's got to be 10 or less.
• 31:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: That's got to be, that's got to be about the Max.
• 31:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: And then when pressed, they're like Russell Brant on Pierce Morgan's.
• 31:40
  [SPEAKER_01]: Oh my god, that is one of those.
• 31:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: What is fucking cool if you want to see something seriously funny, look up Russell brand on Pierce Morgan.
• 31:51
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, trying to find a fucking Bible verse.
• 31:53
  [SPEAKER_01]: Go find it on YouTube right now.
• 31:55
  [SPEAKER_01]: It sounds here and I saw you.
• 31:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: Excuse me.
• 31:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: It says here, but I can't seem to find it and he just keeps paging through and he can't find it and he can't find it.
• 32:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's because it's a fucking hotel Bible.
• 32:07
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 32:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you can tell because of the pages, they're so thin.
• 32:10
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 32:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 32:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
• 32:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's a prop.
• 32:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's clearly a prop.
• 32:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because you're going on Pierce Morgan show.
• 32:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: You don't have your verse that like change your life.
• 32:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: You don't have that one marked.
• 32:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: Well, he wrote a book called How to Be Come a Christian in seven days or something like that.
• 32:26
  [SPEAKER_01]: And it was released by a conversing group of then Tucker Carlson runs, like are you fucking kidding me?
• 32:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: Tucker Carlson publishing how far down the the the shit hold you have to go.
• 32:40
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 32:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: To have that be your place in this world.
• 32:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: Let me let me ask you this, how much of a soul do you have to not have to sell what's left of it and just not even give a fuck that everybody sees you doing it.
• 33:12
  [SPEAKER_01]: of noxious.
• 33:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Yes.
• 33:13
  [SPEAKER_01]: You know, like it's so, it's so, it's so obviously put on.
• 33:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's so performative and silly.
• 33:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that's what this chapter was.
• 33:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: This chapter was Russell Brand trying to squeeze everything in and he can't find the page.
• 33:27
  [SPEAKER_01]: Right.
• 33:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: This chapter could not find the page.
• 33:30
  [SPEAKER_01]: It could, it could.
• 33:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so they were like, when I will just write it all in here.
• 33:33
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 33:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: No, none of that happened.
• 33:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: I hate it.
• 33:36
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, anyway.
• 33:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: That was Matthew chapter 17.
• 33:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: I guess it was who knows.
• 33:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: It was something.
• 33:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's that's what they that's what they wrote it down as I don't know if that's what it was, but that's what they call it.
• 33:47
  [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
• 33:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Some say I'm sorry.
• 33:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm I'm so put out.
• 33:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: That's so fucking put out.
• 33:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: My glowworm and go to bed.
• 33:58
  [SPEAKER_01]: All right, y'all, that was Matthew chapter 17.
• 34:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: We will be back next time with some more bullshit and little Maddie, I guess chapter 18.
• 34:08
  [SPEAKER_01]: Wife's, wife's done.
• 34:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: What?
• 34:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: I hate the New Testament.
• 34:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: All right, thanks for joining us.
• 34:13
  [SPEAKER_01]: We will see you, oh, what?
• 34:15
  [SPEAKER_01]: This was a live show, we've got to mention it.
• 34:16
  [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, this was live.
• 34:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: I hope you joined us, but you didn't.
• 34:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: So you're a loser.
• 34:21
  [SPEAKER_01]: Unless you did, then you're awesome.
• 34:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: Well, I mean, the one that you're also not a loser, if you didn't join us, but you should join us next time so that you can ensure
• 34:28
  [SPEAKER_01]: that you're not.
• 34:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: Listen, listen.
• 34:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you want to come to the Tea Party with Moses and Elijah, you need to get your ass in to the discord and sit at the table like everybody else does.
• 34:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: Every Tuesday at 10 p.m. Eastern or else you're not at the Tea Party.
• 34:45
  [SPEAKER_01]: All right, we'll see you next time, guys.
• 34:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Bye.