Latest / The Bigger Stage w/ Matt Stone / Beyond Networking: Building Transformative Relationships
Transcript
- BBR Show Pre-Launch Convo - Arthi Rabikrisson === Matt Stone: [00:00:00] Welcome to the Building Business Relationships Show. I'm Matt Stone, and before we officially launch, we are exploring what matters most when it comes to relationships in business. These early episodes are about testing ideas, learning from guests, and hearing what you think belongs in the conversation. So please do listen or watch, share your thoughts and help shape what this show becomes. Matt Stone: And I'm so excited because today joining me is Arthi Rabikrisson. Matt Stone: Did I say that right? Arthi: Well done, Matt. Matt Stone: Yes, she is amazing. Um, but let me get into some details about why. She's a global award-winning leadership coach, keynote speaker, and thought leader who helps transform individuals and organizations for peak performance. As founder of the Prerna Advisory Firm dedicated to coaching, capital, raising alternative investments in strategic consulting, Arthi draws on intensive 16 year corporate legacy in the investments industry spanning [00:01:00] equity research, talent management, capital raising, portfolio leadership, business transformation, coaching and mentoring, and more. Arthi's unique value chain of expertise and wealth of unconventional insights, which we are excited about Matt Stone: today especially, in these environments, enable her to guide leaders and teams to unlock their talent potential. Matt Stone: Focusing on human-centered, ecosystem based approaches that deliver impact for people, planet, and Matt Stone: profit. Matt Stone: The three Ps. Arthi's approach is rooted in deep relational intelligence, global investor networks, and a structural mindset that fits companies and cultures across industries and geographies. Basically, she's an amazing badass woman of the world, helping tons of people and companies, and now she's here with us today. Matt Stone: Thank you, Matt Stone: Arthi. Arthi: Matt, that was such a blush, blushing kind of terms of the introduction. Thank you so much. I'm so excited to be here today. Matt Stone: Awesome. Well now, as you know Arthi in this format, we dive Matt Stone: [00:02:00] right in. Looking back, what's a business relationship that's had a major impact on your career and or your life? Arthi: Matt. think there's several actually. And I think for many of us, if we think and reflect back, we'll realize there's been a few. if I have it down to Matt Stone: I. Arthi: I would say it was probably early in my career. Um, and it was, uh, a line manager of mine, who basically, you know, kind of said to me, Arthi, I can see you are very strategic. Arthi: I can see that you've got a very, very different pathway. And remember I was in a very technical role. I was junior, I was in a technical role. I was an equity analyst in the investments industry. And you know Matt, that pathway is like pretty set, right? You're gonna do particular studies, you're gonna do particular, courses you're gonna follow and become a senior analyst rated all of that good stuff. Arthi: So he basically said to me, Arthi, I can see you're something different here. And in effect, [00:03:00] what he did was he just opened up this pathway to something completely different. So what ended up happening was, and I like to call it almost a three dimensional view of, of where my career could go. He just put so much opportunity and trust in me, trust in the sense that, Arthi, you can do this, that it really shaped my trajectory. Suddenly, I was doing something outside of the norm from a study perspective. I was doing my MBA, instead of a CFA, and I was pretty young. I was suddenly sitting in these senior forums and they were asking for my voice, and I was like, whoa, this is amazing. Arthi: And I was also getting a chance to shape other people's trajectories as well. I was mentoring, I was doing a bit of coaching, so that ultimately and over the rest of my career basically ended up landing where I am today, doing what I'm doing in a beautiful introduction that you shared with everyone. Arthi: So that's really the one that stands out for me, I must [00:04:00] admit. Matt Stone: It's so amazing to me how critical it is to hear certain things from Matt Stone: other people in order to see ourselves, for what our real potential is. We can't see it clearly and someone says, you know, have you thought about this? You know, you're really great at XY and you're like, oh, my, your Matt Stone: whole world opens up and that it just catapults you. Arthi: It really does, and I think you know, it, it comes down to, you know what mark does that then leave for you, right? Because if that trust that, that I'm talking about that he gave in me, I mean in a way it almost gave me permission to sort of say, hey, you can think a bit bigger now. Arthi: Right? You can actually expand where you wanna go. You can try and fail. You can potentially even reciprocate what you are receiving from that person as well. So there's this big element of reciprocity, and I've noticed that that's something that I tend to do. Not only did I give back into that relationship, but I've given it [00:05:00] forward in other relationships too. Arthi: So imagine just that one can unlock so much exactly what you said. Matt Stone: You anticipated my next question so we could check that off. You work with so many different types of businesses and clients and across geographies even. What are some of the most common relational issues that you see pop up when you're working Matt Stone: with clients? Arthi: Oh, you know, I, I almost feel at the very, very heart of it. I mean, yes, we talk about conflict, communication, like these, these buzzwords that come in, right. Um, when somebody sits in a session with me. But Matt, ultimately what's underlying all of that is actually relational understanding, and building out that relationship capital. Arthi: And that's actually what I'm finding, right? So a lot of the time I'm working with senior leaders, middle managers, yeah, across the spectrum actually. But ultimately they're very technical. You know, I'm very strong in my skillset and my competencies. But man, [00:06:00] I'm really, really struggling when it comes to the people element. Arthi: And that's what I'm finding, that the ability to build a network and not just build a network, but to maintain a network, that's where the biggest emphasis and time has to be taken. Right? Um, for me, that's, that's the crux of it. So that's where I end up spending a lot of time helping, you know, across the spectrum, people to kind of identify, well, how do I stay real in my relationships? Arthi: And that's key, right? How do I be authentic? How do I ensure that I'm responding effectively? How am I, uh, aligning to others, but also showing up in a particular way? How do I lead them in this relationship too? So it's like all of these different elements that come in just to help build this kind of relational capital. Arthi: So yeah, these elements, that relationship aspect definitely underlies everything. And that's at the heart of what's going on here. People have forgotten how to invest in social capital. Matt Stone: Yeah. Or they never learned. um, fully. [00:07:00] Right? I don't even like the word networking much anymore, to be honest with you. 'cause it's like, it de dehumanizes the process. It's really about building trust with people and then you'll wanna, help them out and, and you'll wanna do it just out of the kindness of your heart and then have a good business, um, outcome. Arthi: Uh, you know, Matt Stone: Yeah. Arthi: again, it's like one of those words that has been so overdone and overused that people forget what it's actually meant to be. And it is actually the beautiful C word. Which is connection. Right? And, and, Matt Stone: Yeah. Arthi: that, again, that trust Matt Stone: Yeah, Arthi: element that if you get that right, oh my gosh, that connection element just becomes so strong. Arthi: Matt. I mean, you and I are almost testament Matt Stone: yeah. Arthi: of that, right? COVID was such a big Matt Stone: Yeah. Arthi: launchpad that we were able to form a relationship. And everyone, I hope I, I don't think you know this, but Matt and I, we only got a chance to meet once when I flew across the ocean, um, to New York. And that was an amazing, amazing get together. Arthi: But we had met prior to that only virtually. [00:08:00] Um, so, you know, that ability for us to have built that kind of rapport, that kind of connect, that kind of trust for us to share. I mean, Matt, we can't even put a price on that. Right? Um, so you're quite right. It's, Matt Stone: No. Arthi: element, it's the connection element, and it's, it's what comes after that. Arthi: Like I said, you know, how do I ensure that I am, doing some of the little things that show that I care about somebody, that show that I want to be a part of, you know who you are and how does that actually show up? You know, we talk about presence, we talk about Matt Stone: Yeah. Arthi: um, being real. We talk about showing our vulnerabilities because people see that human side of us and we connect. Arthi: But yeah, true connection. It takes work. You just don't connect like Matt Stone: Yeah, Arthi: plugging in a USB point and that kind of connection, actually have to keep it going everybody. So yeah, absolutely. Spot on. Matt Stone: You gotta feed it, nurture it. Yeah. Water it like a garden. Yeah. And also I think what you're saying in different words is something I Matt Stone: really believe in, which is, building [00:09:00] trust for trust's sake, not for what you're Matt Stone: gonna get out of it. Just build the trust for trust's sake, and the rest then becomes natural and easy. Matt Stone: Then you're not worried about it. But unfortunately, what I've noticed with a lot of networking groups is because of the format and the way that Matt Stone: they're formed, there's sort of this forced transactionalism that I think Matt Stone: runs, it's not intentionally done this way, but for me there's always this conflict of like. I have to be transactional with you because we're in Matt Stone: this group, but I would rather just learn about you and your family and get to know who you are as a person. 'cause that's what's gonna de decide whether or not I ever think of you when I'm referring, you know, is who would I Matt Stone: trust? Yeah. Arthi: my gosh. It's, uh, I don't know, you know, what's actually spurring that to become the norm now in terms of relationships Matt Stone: Hmm. Arthi: Look, maybe it's a couple of things. Maybe it's fear, you know, um, maybe it's fear of vulnerability even. Right? Um, Matt Stone: right. Arthi: Maybe it's this highly competitive nature [00:10:00] that we are in. Arthi: Um, where everyone feels well, to be honest, it's not just a feeling. If you think of, of the way organizations are set, are set up, it's very much I'm measuring success based on who I'm competing against, right? So this sense of, you know, let's actually connect and do things together and let's win together. Arthi: It's only like now that we're getting the surge of understanding that actually, you know what, you wanna go fast, go alone if you wanna go far go together. adage. Um, but I think it's all of these bits that kind of underlie why it's been pervading in this very transactional way in, if anything, Matt Stone: Hmm. Arthi: And I mean, if we think about over time, some of our biggest relationships that we've formed have been absolutely powerful and transformational, not transactional. Arthi: And I think that's probably the cue that we all need to consider. Like, am I investing in this relationship because it's transformative? Well, actually it's just transactional. I'm gonna get something out of it and I'm gonna walk [00:11:00] away. Yeah. We have to ask ourselves these things. Matt Stone: Yeah. And such a different energy, those two things, such a different energy. Matt Stone: Oh my goodness. Once again, you're already anticipating kind of where I'm going, let's pull on this thread just a little more. 'cause you know, as I was talking with you before we started recording, one of the big goals of these pre-launch conversations is to flush out topics that we should put on the table for our round tables. Matt Stone: And you gotta be a part of some of our round table discussions. By the way, I'm gonna be inviting you. Arthi: you. That would be amazing. Matt Stone: Because we want a global perspective. We want a perspective from all different backgrounds and, professional focuses, et cetera. So I think you'd be a great additional voice to some of these. One of them I want to talk about is networking. Uh, asking the question, do networking groups work? Um, you know, are is or is it broken? And really get into it and have a debate over that. Um, what are some other things, along those lines or other lines that come up for you that we're not talking about enough [00:12:00] in terms of relationships that we should be? Arthi: Such a great question, Matt. Um, and I would say, you know, if I, if, if I look at my experience and like what I'm involved in, and oftentimes I find we're doing one of two things, right? We're, kind of mentoring and paying it forward in that way, or even coaching as well, or we are needing to almost lead upwards, meaning that I'm needing to make my boss look really good. We are kind of doing this vertical pathway around relationship building. So I'm, I'm sharing my expertise down, but I'm also pushing up. And I think the thing that we don't talk about enough is actually horizontal relationships, right? Our peers, our friends, our colleagues, even our competitors where possible. Arthi: And the reason potentially why we are not talking about that is because the other type of relationship and networking, if you wanna call it management, is, um, very visible. Like if you're [00:13:00] mentoring somebody, people know about it. There's outcomes. Similarly, if you're pushing upward and you're making your boss look really good, of course he's tooting the horn and calling you out. Arthi: But, you know, if when you're looking at your colleague and you're offering, you know, wisdom or guidance or advice, it's done in these quiet corners. Nobody toots the horn of, Hey, you know, my colleague really, really helped me, unless they're very receptive to doing that, oftentimes it goes unnoticed. Arthi: And I believe, and I'm, I'm noticing in, in the African context, we're spending a lot more time now thinking about peer circles, and thinking about how we're leveraging that as an opportunity to actually grow relationships on that breadth spectrum, on that horizontal spectrum, and I think we need to be talking more about it because there's such beautiful energy, there's such beautiful solutioning that comes out of that. Arthi: There's almost an unmasking as well. Like [00:14:00] I can actually be myself with these people because we're at that level where we can do that. There's some really, really beautiful things that transpire out of it, and I would really love for us to think about deliberately what's holding people back from joining these types of things, right? Arthi: Maybe it is that transactional element and some of the other things I mentioned earlier as well, the competition, um, the vulnerability and all of that. But then if that's the case, how do we flip the switch on that and actually get a lot more of that going? I mean, I'm a firm believer that, if you are actually boosting the signal for everybody, everybody's gonna download success. Arthi: Let's do that. Right? Let's do that. So yeah, I think that's an area to consider potentially. Matt Stone: Love it. And yeah, and getting out of the zero sum game kind of mentality that in order for me to win, someone else has to lose. Let's dive into peer circles, peer circles more, and I would just ask that you send me anything along the way as you're experiencing it in your region or [00:15:00] wherever. And let's cross-pollinate these ideas and put 'em on the table for discussion. So peer circles with Arthi. Okay. One final question. Now you know a bit more about the show than the average Joe, as we might say, or Josephina. So what excites you most about the launch of The Building Business Relationships Show? Arthi: think, I harkens Arthi: back to what said at the beginning of the show, Matt, the fact that we are focusing on relational capital in your show. Phenomenal. There's so many areas around this. You know, there's gonna be learning, there's gonna be guidance, you're gonna be hearing from the best voices in the business doing this. Arthi: Um, and what it really excites me is that we are actually gonna, and I know how you are Matt with this, we are gonna go under, under the surface. We are really gonna dig deep. Um, and I'm excited for that because I think the listeners, the subscribers to the podcast, are really gonna get that, you know, let's pull the wool off, let's actually get to the nitty gritty of [00:16:00] what's going on here. Arthi: And from that, how do we actually build and elevate and amplify the good that can come from actually building that relational capital? So that's what really excites me. We are gonna get to the heart and we are gonna make it bigger, make it bigger, extend the circle Matt Stone: Yes, I love it and hear from all voices. And, um, you know, different strokes for different folks too. I mean, there's, you know, there's different ways of approaching these things depending on where you are and cultural differences, and I want to get all that out there. So, um, oh my goodness. Matt Stone: What a pleasure. What a joy. Matt Stone: Our time has come to an end for today on this, but thank you so much for just being you and being so generous with your thoughts and ideas and sharing. Arthi: Thank you so much, Matt. It's been an absolute, absolute pleasure. The time has gone so quickly, and everyone, if you have not hit subscribe, please do right now. I mean, this is gonna be the show you want to be listening to. Thanks, Matt. It's been a great chatting. Matt Stone: Yes, thank you. I'm gonna pick up on that. Please be an early adopter [00:17:00] and don't be shy about sharing ideas for the show. The best feedback we can get is about what kind of topics and the more controversial, the better. What are we not talking about? This show needs to push boundaries and that's why we're also gonna have a healthy dose of comedy in the show because comedy is a great way to keep it entertaining and break the norm while we talk about things that might be uncomfortable too. Matt Stone: So, we're going to be doing that. And with that, thanks for listening to the Building Business Relationships Show. This pre-launch phase is all about discovery. So if something sparked your interest, we'd love to hear from you. Matt Stone: Share your thoughts, ideas or guest suggestions and help us shape the conversations to come. And of course, subscribe and like these videos, uh, especially on YouTube, but also on other formats. Uh, so you'll be the first to know when we officially launch, and in the meantime when new content drops. Thanks again for listening and watching. Matt Stone: We'll see you next time. [00:18:00]