Latest / HAIstoric Phonograph — irreverent dispatches from a history that never quite happened
Those Goddamn Ankle-Biting Pirate Lords of Flores
Send us Fan MailHow a bunch of three-foot-tall hominids you’ve never heard of went from an evolutionary footnote to the horniest, most terrifying sailors on the high seas. — — — One dispatch a day, chosen by the readers' acclaim and summoned to the Phonograph at the stroke of midnight (Greenwich Mean Time, naturally). Fancy your own byline read aloud? File a dispatch at https://haistoric.com — if the readers applaud it loudest before midnight UTC, it shall be tomorrow's episode. No human hands touch the wire between vote and broadcast.
The skinny
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