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Church Complaints, Comedy Roulette, JAB Special, Too Much TV and more. · The Steve Harvey Morning Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Today's show is pre recorded. Y'all know what y'all don't know?
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Y'all all giving them like the mozing bu bu things
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: not good. Steve har Steve, I don't join. You gotta
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: turn you turn to turn them out. Turn got the
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: turnmout to turn the water the water. Come come on
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: your back, huh. I show will a good morning everybody.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: You're listening to the voice I said, come on now,
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: I dig me to one. It only Steve Harvey got
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: a radio show. Okay, Now, I'm gonna be really honest
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: with you this morning. I really don't know what to say.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: I really don't. I was sitting here and I was thinking,
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: what do I say today? I do know that I
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: want to be encouraging, uplifting and inspirational in some way
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: to affect somebody today. Oftentimes, these conversations that I have
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: in the mornings, they're designed with me because I am.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: I needed myself, y'all, to be honest with you. I mean,
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: you know who makes the comedian laugh? I used to
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: say all the time, And even though what we talk
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: about in the morning is not a laughing matter, it
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: kind of like it's where I am today. You know,
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: I need motivation in my life sometimes myself. I think
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: when I get in moments like this, I often resort
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: back to the same thing over and over and over.
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: And when I find myself in certain predicaments, I could
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: always fall back on the same thing over and over.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: So while I'm sitting here trying to figure out what
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: to say to you, the one thing that I did
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: do this morning that I find to be very consistent
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: in me is that I find myself grateful. I'm ever
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: grateful for the things that God has done for me.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: I may not always know what to say, but I
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: know how to say thank you. I do. I know
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: how to remember and reflect back on where I come from.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: I know how to realize where all my blessings come from.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: I'm very very conscious of my journey that I've been on,
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: the the one that was from then until now, that
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: journey right there is it's been. It's been. It's been.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: It's been difficult, man, it really really has. I ain't
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: gonna lie to you, um me, becoming successful was very difficult.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: But as hard as this is to say, I really
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: really mean this. I wouldn't change nothing about the trip
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: I've been on. Number One, because I can't change anything
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: about it. So I never lived my life and regret.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: But the main thing is was I discovered along the
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: way now, not doing the process. When you're going through
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: rough moments today, you can't hardly see the good in it.
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: At the time. It's just rough for you and it
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: seems unexplainable, and oftentimes I thought it was unfair. But
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: as I am now, I needed every single thing that
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: happened to me, that happened to me to happen to me.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: I hope that makes sense to you. I needed everything
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: to happen in the exact order and the exact way
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: that it happened in order for me to be the
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: person that I've become. And that right there, man, is
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: just very comforting to me. Mister Jakes told me one time,
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: he said, the closer you get to God, the more
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: friendly you all become, the more He will reveal to
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: you the how it comes and the what fays of
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: a lot of things has happened to you. Because a
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: lot of times what troubles us is we just can't
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: understand why we lost that love one back then. We
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: just can't understand why we didn't get what we wanted
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: back then. We just don't understand how come our plan
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: didn't work out and we had to fail so miserably
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: back then, we don't understand the answers to these things. Well,
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: the closer I've gotten to God, the more of those
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: explanations have become crystal clear to me. And See, the
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: one thing that I came to the realization everybody is
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: that the things that was happening to me, they wasn't
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: really all bad. They really wasn't that they didn't taste
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: good when it was happening, I didn't enjoy what I
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: was going through. But as I look back on him
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: and reflect now, it wasn't all bad. Some of those
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: things was so necessary for me to get the information
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: because say, I don't know about you, but I'm kind
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: of hard headed and stubborn. I said, I don't know
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: about you, but I'm kind of hard headed and stubborn.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: I kind of like to think that I know something
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: about some things every now and then, and the things
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: I am convinced about it. I don't really really care
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: for people trying to talk me off mine. So I
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: can be stubborn and hard headed. Sometimes God knows that
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: about me. So I think to get some of the
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: messages crystal clear through to me that I needed to learn.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: That was this process I had to go through. That
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: process was my journey, It was my trip. It was
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: my WOA, my pain. Say, everybody got them different, It
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: don't matter what it is. Everybody got a WOA, everybody
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: got a pain, everybody got a trial, everybody got some tribulations,
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: everybody got some challenge. I don't care who you are, Duce,
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: quit looking at me thinking that I got it going
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: own so tough man ready. If it's Steve, Yeah, it's
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: easy for you to say that, but you ain't here.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: You don't know. Wow. Man, if you would stop hanging
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: yourself up on your pass worried about your woes and
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: your troubles and the situation you in, and start praying
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: and start asking God to get you through it. See
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: a lot of times you messed it. You messed a
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: message up yourself, because when you're going through some stuff,
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: you ask God to remove it and take it away.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: That ain't the lesson. You got to learn your lesson
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: sometimes it's it's gotta be how to be strong, how
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: to see it through, how to bear under it, how
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: to carry that weight long distances for long periods of time.
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: That's how you get strong The lesson is to make
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: you stronger. But to make you stronger, you got to
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: carry the weight. You can't get stronger, you're gonna go
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: to gym or you're gonna do something at your house
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: to lift your own body weight. See, a lot of
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: people can't even do push ups. Then they can't get down,
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: And then the course of a day, give you a
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: hundred push ups because they ain't. They ain't, they ain't.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: Never try to anybody. They get you twenty and that
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: you shake it so bad they stop. WHOA, that's too
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: much for me. Well, let me tell you something. So
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: I learned to quit praying to take stuff away. My
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: prayer became to give me the strength to handle it.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: People oftentimes ask me, how do you do all that
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: you do in the course of the day. I don't
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: really know. I just know I can because I know
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: God don't put more on you than you can bath.
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: So when you ask me how you do all of
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: what you do in the course of the day, I
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: got God. God is good. He'll get you through whatever
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: it is you're going through. So when you're tripping and
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: you don't know what to say, reflect and be grateful
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: for all you reflect on. Think about God's goodness and
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: watch what he do for you. That's the cold part. Okay,
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: you're listening morning show, ladies and gentlemen, Boys and girls,
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: this is not quiet story. This is Steve Harder reserving
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: his voice because it's leaving him and overworked, and have
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: decided that I've got to slow it down. To ladies
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: and gentlemen, this show will be ran today by two foods,
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: and I want to apologize for anything happening. And Shirley
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: and uh, Carla, I want to say good luck to
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: both of you because you are going to have a
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: tough time controlling two foods. We normally being you know,
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: just ignorant. Am here to provide some type of stability,
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: but I won't be able to to my boys, Carl
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: don't don't, don't. Don't backtalk me unless you want these
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: knuckles on your list. So, ladies and gentlemen, Shirley Strawberry,
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: good morning, Hey, no, no, good morning. You ain't got
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: to get a stoney Steve, good morning, good morning, good morning, Hey,
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: good morning. You've been tell me Junior morning, I ain't changed. Yeah,
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: you can't. Jay watch your damner, Steve who that's after birthday? Voice?
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: Birthday still how birthday? Happy belated birthday again forty two
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: years old. Stop that last. I'm going with um. I'm
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: going with eighty three, eighty three. And see when you
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: tell people you eighty three day, go no you look
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: so good, Well, y'all go ahead and take it over. No,
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: you gotta help out? What yeah? Yeah, yeah, but see
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: still everybody go down. Sometimes it's all right. I gotta
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: protect my voice, and that shows to do today, tomorrow,
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: this weekend. I don't get another half day for a minute,
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: So you need waiting on an assistant who posted been
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: here with some damn throat coat, but his ass ain't here. Well,
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: you know what, I ain't gonna be saying his ass
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: ain't here. Too many motames. Did you speak to the nephew,
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: because one time it's gonna be his ass ain't here.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: No more, you didn't speak to the nephew. I really
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: didn't think it was necessary. Didn't come more. I got you,
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: I got you. Your over worked. Well, let's be real
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: about it. You're not underpaid. We got you're not underpaid,
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: but represent we got you today. Let your throat down
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: and set your throat right over there. You want to
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: you want to take it out, run bag right here.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: We got you years ago. We were on the radio
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: just in La and Steve fell out to take your
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: throat out and look at wow. Coming up at thirty
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: two minutes after the hour, we're gonna run that prank
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: back with the nephew right after this. You're listening to
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: show right now. It is Monday. Reverend Motown, Deacon death
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: Jam are here with church complaints. Let's go m We
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: were here tod Yes, Monty Galbert was symbolized detriputedly, I
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: said detroputedly, Hey, revelized, that's rend here on big Word Monday. Oh.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: I've been talking with the congregation and my old lady
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: friend and wants me to increase marvel vocabulary. So all
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: my responses will be given in big word Monday fashion.
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: Go ahead, d right. I don't have any big words,
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: but I do have complaints. Now. As you know, Pastor,
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: we're excited to be approaching resurrection Sunday. The congregation is
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: asking amen. The congregation is asking that we're not the
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: not so smart kids not recite they Easter speech on Sunday.
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: They're at least fifteen of them that we that I
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: that we're concerned about. But of course, sister what is that?
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: LaDonna Davis wants DeAndre to do his as you know,
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: he's feel teen and still in the fourth grade, but
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: she definitely wants him to do his speak. Well, we're
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: going to how many is it, Deacon? If fifteen we
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: worried about, we're going to accept five of them, this
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: five of the nights, so smart ones because we can't
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: sit through fifteen. Well, tell sister love Donna. The last
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: ship it was die polo cololess. Oh, not a big
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: words dial polocolosis. Oh everyone di dial like dial like
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: you and do lea oka do pollo poly mean five
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: di po wow dire pollock. Do you remember what kids
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: you forgot? You forgot the apologists, the thin diapolitologists, dire politologists,
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: diatologists photologists or form of a doctor that them five
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: bars and died need a medical assistance dia polodologists. You
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: changed it to go with what I knew, big word
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: Monday gonna be hard on me. Go ahead, all right,
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: I don't think I don't think any more responses will
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: be with big words because the go ahead, the Eastern
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Egg Hunt Committee has a major problem. As you know,
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: brother Thaddius Radcliffe, who worked at the veterinary clinic, browed
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: eggs from his job and they are now mixed up
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: with the regular eggs. So he brought snake eggs, alligator eggs,
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: I think eggs, and supposed to be fifteen penguin eggs.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: How do you want to handle this past for the
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: East egg Well, I said, go ahead and let him.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: Don't say nothing to the kids, but I'll tell you
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: who hut though you can't a mags only and you
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: don't eat them all today, be surprised for you somewhere
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: in the week you're gonna look up and be Aguada
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: walking around your house. You ain't gonna like it him. So, uh,
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: you know, I don't know whether what you can't do
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: un telling you black people that could be a potential
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: lizard in the house or snake that you can't do.
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: So just let it. Let let let sleeping dogs lie
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: deacon and deal with it as it comes. Get get
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: a pet a pet retrieval service number. Really, I don't
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: you know how you call? Like the people that handle
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: snakes and everything that ain't gonna bother it's a snake.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: They're gonna get loosing black peo. Thats what you need?
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: Whatever that people and people ain't got no speed and
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: can't have the good. Yeah, don't worry about the snake.
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: Can't get snake and lizard in the black people housing
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: will my body will have a bank robble with a
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: gun sing and yeah, alright, moving along path. We have
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: a big issue with Big Red cos we agreed that
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: he would play Christ in the church play. But the
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: cross keep breaking due to his weight. He can't we
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: can't keep him on the cross path the eye and
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: how default say they don't have any wood that can
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: hold it? What did you want to deal? Just let
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: everybody walk up to the front and look down on
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: him and do their lines from there. Yeah, because he
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: ain't Christ nowhere, we ain't fit to look up to
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: it was gonna look it ain't high looking, It ain't
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: who who won't about down in front of big big
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: a redell he gonna be the Christ? Then you know
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: we're gonna do. We're gonna do it all. I'll tell
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: you what we'll do. We're gonna do, uh carry on
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: the resurrection scene after we're gonna just do add on
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: it and then take Dale off the cross down there,
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: get him out there. Yeah, just did you do it
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: like that? Because he he't who he don't look a
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: like who I think he isn't. All right, I'm sorry,
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: right well, I'm just saying redel ain't fit to play here.
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: We don't like people playing the role. Yea, that is.
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: But you the one came in here went to complaint.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: I'm just trying to work it. All right, We're more brutiful,
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: brutiful you all right, We'll be back with more of
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: the Steam Harvey Morning Show right after you're listening to show.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: All right, guys, time for the clo the Chief Love Officer.
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: It's a close calls you all right, you heard him,
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: He's ready. This one is from John, a podcast listener.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: John says, I've been listening to your Strawberry letters on
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: the podcast, and I didn't need to write a whole letter.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: Thank you John for doing that. But I hope you
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: can give me some real advice. I'm a thirty two
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: year old single male and the women I meet are
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: around my age and experienced in the bedroom. I try
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: to warn women up front that I'm a big boy,
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: but even the most experienced women run away from it
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: and me. For some men this would be a good thing,
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: but it's been a problem for me since high school.
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: What can I do different to keep a woman? Well, well,
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: what I did, dog, was I just you know you
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: gotta you know, you gotta, I mean, you know, I
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: just you know. It was good? I mean good question.
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: You know, I don't understand you know you what you
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: gotta see? You ain't. You ain't handling it right. First
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: of all, quit talking about it. That's what starters, you know,
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: because now mentally, and then what you do is after
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: that when it gets to the point of the actual
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: act occurring. Dog, you ain't got nothing to prove. Stop
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: trying to prove stuff. You know? Easy? Easy, easy? You
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: know you know all this, you know all talk. You
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: be here, I'm going to do this. I'm going to
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: do that now. You're not easy, So you can keep somebody.
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: It's gonna happen for you regardless. What you don't want
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: to do is ruin it for the second time. Take
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: your time, easy to keep the light out. I'm easy, Well,
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: keeping the light out, don't really work time it because
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: I'm telling you, because it ain't got nothing to do
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: with darkness. So you just want him to surprise the ladies. Yeah,
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: but go ahead, but easy. You know you ain't women
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: have babies. You ain't that dig now, just slow down.
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: You ain't all that now. I appreciate your right knee
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: and try to make it sound like you all that,
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: but you ain't. Just slow down. Maybe you know I
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: used to feel that way too, but I'd ran up
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: in the sue stuff in my life. Boy, well, I
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: was just just just over that. Who are you what
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: you're doing? Moving on? Jay folding in hand. Destiny in
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: Toledo as we move on says I'm having a surprise
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: forty of birthday party for my boyfriend and I'm only
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: inviting ten people because of COVID. A random female called
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: me and asked for my address because she was paid
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: to dance at the party as a surprise. I told her, no,
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: thank you. My boyfriend's brother called and told me he
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: already paid the stripper, and he demanded that I either
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: give him his money back or let the girl dance.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: Should I mess up the surprise and tell my man
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: to handle his brother, or should I curse him out myself? Hey?
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: Wait a minute, this dude got to be kid. You
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: can't handle nobody can't get a dancer for your brother.
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: And he got a wife, yeah girlfriend, their boyfriend girlfriend.
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: But yeah, no, you can't do that. You can't do that. No,
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: you ain't gotta lit your brother handle. Hey, here's what
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: you do. I think you need to end this surprise
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: they before everybody gets surprised. So I think, really what
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: you ought to do is I think you ought to
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: just tell her tell a boyfriend. Ain't no, ain't no,
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: ain't no stripper coming in this house right here, and
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: if he want to give them money back and let
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: him give it back. But it's it's impossible. You can't
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: do that hand no stripper dancing? How they say he forty,
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah he's turning forty. Got to be joking, man, what funny?
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: Your what? You can't do that? All right? Thank you?
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: Cielo Yolande and Raleigh says, I'm a sixty year old
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: engaged woman. I've been engaged for four years and I
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: can't get my fiance to marry me. We've got a
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: lot in common, but lately he's been using that against me.
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: If we're watching sports or out hunting together, he comments said,
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: I'm cool, just like one of the boys. I rarely
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: wear makeup and dress up and dress up because I'm
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: always at home. Should I take his comments as an
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: negative thing. Is acting like one of the boys ever
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: a good thing? No? Not to me. I've never wanted
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: my woman to act like one of the boys. And what,
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: oh wait, and what do you mean by we be
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: out hunting? Hunting together? They ain't hunting, y'alls. You know
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: rabbits of snow shot hunting. Oh oh, you mean hunting? Oh?
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: I thought you meant like swingers. Okay, hunting? No, no, no,
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: you need to stay your ass at home, dress up sometime,
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: put something on. Stop looking like a hunter. Hell yeah,
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: which I was out in the clubs hunting. I was
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: going down. What literally, so I'm going to be gonna
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: you're hunting? What kind of message this? But I see
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: why y'all ain't married hey, or have him too money?
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: But you're hunting. You're sitting up in the tree and
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: the blind, you're in the bushes with him. Damn, stay
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: your ass on, quit hunting. Yeah, yeah, dress up? Yeah,
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: that ain't sexy right there when he comes surprised him sometimes, Yeah,
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: you're here the men, ma'am, you're Londa and nobody Lyne
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: with me hunting Jack and walking in the house with
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: it dead duck in her hand. He said it did
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: so dressed up, put on some heels, put on some lipsticks.
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: Sometimes every yeah, every nine and then. You ain't gonna
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: do it every day, but every now and then, you know. Okay,
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: all right? Uh check you have a question as we
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: go out. We got like thirty seconds. Oh, I have
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: a question. Seconds? No, do you want to go? You
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: want to go? I can't believe you thought it was
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: a swingers term. So you come once a weekend stand.
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: You don't have a coution where you all right, more
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: of this crazy ignorant show. Steve Harvey Morning Show. Right
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: after this you're listening Morning show, all right, Steve, Steve.
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: This one for you, Jay, Tommy Junior. This segment is
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: for the ladies. Thank you, guys. This is called Jay
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: Ways to get a man to stop hollering at you? Okay,
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: because it right? Oh yeah ye. The way the things
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: you can do, things you can do you say, Holida,
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: you know, just aggravating you Raya, Yeah, all that out
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: your life. Ways to get that done for coughing uncontrolled
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: off the real I'm talking about Ada. Don't get us
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: to walk alm. Yeah, I got one. Come on, tell
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: them you don't go nowhere without your grand mama. You'll
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: deceige grandmama. And that's grandmama, grandmama. Think you cut right
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: that with you right at all time, at all time.
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what. When did
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: you get the mac in real hard? You said, you
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: know what, I gotta go get some depends real quick.
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: I'd be right. I hope they got my size still
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: in right. I'm taking note that this this is for
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: the ladies. The guys are telling us ways that we
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: can get men to stop hollering at us. Okay, steve
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: a fake test result on your chest that says you
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: have VD right away? Do you call it what you
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: want to way back in the day, if you guys, yes, yeah, yeah,
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: you get it. You you you you, you'll understand, you
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: know you got it. Act glad you're talking on the
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: phone and say, hey, don't make me shoot you again. Okay,
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: just these are ways for the ladies to get men
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: to stop trying to holler at them. Leave you alone. Yeah,
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: don't let them get two in. Don't let them get
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: two hollows in starts scratching right up under your or
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: you start leaving streets makes me, yeah, just start scratch.
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: He don't know what that scratching about. Stop talking. I
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: come on, nephew, go in the closet and get butt
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: naked and sit Indian style and burn some incense. Ye
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: him killing right there. I promise you to run his
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: ass straight on. Yeah, yeah, come on, seeing help the ladies.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: He walk up to your start talking to you. Say. Look, look,
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: he ain't gonna do nothing, but my exits crossed the
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: street watching. He ain't gonna do that. Watch like you see.
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: Get them off right up? Yeah, come on, waste to
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: get him in. Tell him you got seven kids and
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: the two oldest is still standing at the house when
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: he started talking. Listen, I need a character with it
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: when you come to court with me. I need somebody
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: to tend when you come to court. Right there, I'm
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: sorry before before you ask me anything, Can you help
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: me lift my car from my hug? What happened? Don't
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: worry about I just need to help get him my mother.
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: I got one looking right now. You better step back.
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: My girlfriend's very jealous. Like a more physical approach and
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: they started talking to you because I know something that
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: just turned me off. If you see him and he
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: starts talking to you, hawk and spit that, I get
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: all of it. In the first it was coughing. Now
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: this hey baby, and make you right right back, he go,
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: he gonna walked right away. These are you want to
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: stop talking to you? Yes, thank you guys for your help.
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: These are ways that men we can do these things
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: and make men leave us alone and stopt trying to
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: holler at us. What you got dad? All just stand
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: there and look at it and start peeing right, Just
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: pee right there and just look at so you know
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: where that happens in continent. Yes, just your Oh he's
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: so gone. Oh, I can't believe this is happening again.
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: Draw this from your own experiences, that's what I okay, yeah,
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: that's what it sounds, all right, Come on, Yeah, this
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: is easy. This is simplest radis this one right here.
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: If you don't have the courage for a lot of
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: stuff and you just want to finally just get this
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: dude out your face, here's one simple way to do it.
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: Develop bad bro, yeah, oh oh yeah. Coffee coffee onion.
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: All right, we'll have more of the Steve Harvey Morning
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: Show coming up right after this. You're listening to show?
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: All right, guys, it is time to play around up.
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: Would you rather here we go? Would you rather get
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: away with any lie you tell? Any lie you tell
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: you can get away with it? Or would you rather hey,
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: my whole life goal right there? Baby age? I don't
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: because I want aga. This is for you, junior. Or
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: would you rather detect any lie you here? So? Would
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: you rather be able to get away with one or
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: be able to tell him? Yeah? All day a day?
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: Don't you care if someone's lying to you? I care?
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: I would lie back. Dam Just two liars talking, that's
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: a good conversation to wave? What el ball should do? That?
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: What day we should lie to each other on a
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: cold dog? Just the whole damn thing. I just want
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: to be all mine, be believable. Yeah, my whole goal
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: in life anyway, man, Lord, thank you Jesus. I can't
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: say this, and she fuln't believe it. Yes, she's paid
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: to lighting you too. I don't, but damn I've been
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: lied too before. I can handle it, y'all. One can't
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: handle it. I want the truth. I want to know
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: the truth. Now I want what sound good? I love it.
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: I love you too, Thank you baby? Seeing them all
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: okay't can't wait, okay, ain't no problems problem, ain't no problem?
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: Lie to me? Yeah, oh my god. Oh you're the
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: best to out a head. Thank you, baby, best to
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: out of head? Too? Cool? Great line. Ya, Yeah, I
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: love it. I'm telling you absolutely. Letna tell you why?
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: Surely because men's research department ain't good at all. We
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: ain't research and nothing to find out. It's the truth. No, it'
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: be true. I don't care. There's a lot of a
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: lot of whatever. All right, Well, here's another one. Would
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: you rather never pay for taxes? He never pay for gads?
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: You were gonna say that. Yeah, yeah, I'm about to
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: hell out this gas. Hey. Hey, you know, hey, I
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: don't give a damn of gas. It's thirty dollars a gallon.
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: If I could just get out of a yeah, all right.
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: Would you rather be a star of a small movie
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: or be an extra in a really big movie like
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: Top Gun, Maverick or something extra? Walking around? Ain't got
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: no man, Hey, it's gonna be a small last line.
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: You're on the floor, you're part all right? One last
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: one if we have time, would you rather German chocolate
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: cake or cherry hey hey? Or cherry pie? Because you
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: know why? Because it's hard to find a good cherry path.
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: Oh because I know that anybody know he's sliding my
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: DM to some I don't know. Why are you saying?
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: All right? All right, that's today's round. If would you rather? Thanks?
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: Guys you're listening to now. There is science that supports
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: that kids with older parents, older parents, now, especially fathers,
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: especially the dads, might be a little more socially awkward
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: than kids with younger fathers. All right, I can see.
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: So here's the question. Uh, did you guys have parents
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: that were much older than your friend's parents? Oh? Yeah,
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: and if you did, and if you did, Steve says
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: you did, So how does that affect you? Steve? Growing
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: up abouse a lot of fights about it? Really, What
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: do you mean you got teased about it? Oh? Yeah,
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: you know I went to publish school. Uh with Poe kids. Yeah?
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: Oh grandmama that hey man, I've told you. I've told
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: you twice. Asked you one more town with grandmama and
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: mother and my damn MoMA though no Grandma, I'm explained
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: in nineteen sixty seven, I didn't totally dude, uh huh.
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: In nineteen sixty eight, another dude asked me school, grandmama,
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: up is here to school? That was the day after
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: Man Luther king funeral on TV. I jumped dead on
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: his age. Forget all that piece of love stuff, ain't
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: marm Luke King? Did? I don't want to hear nothing
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: about this? Yeah? I had old parents. Wow, No, my
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: mom never had me when they were forty two. So
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: oh okay, So do you think age matters when it
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: comes to parenting? Then hell you Yeah, you ain't got
• 38:38
  Speaker 1: nothing to talk about. What you're gonna talk about you
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: should happen when you're younger. You think, yeah, recommend that
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: you can have them. Yeah, well, yeah, you don't have
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: nothing to talk about. Well, I mean the things that
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: you want to relate to each the older parents they're
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: much older, you know, the millennials and younger want to
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: talk about tech stuff and h yeah. Well I give
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: you an example. Okay, I don't care for I love
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: the grandkids. When they come over you're running the office.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: Papa hugged me, climb up on me, kiss me on
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: the cheek. I love that man and then get out
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: of here. But wait a minute, Steve, Okay, that would
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: work if you were a much older grandparent, but you're
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: a normal age for a grand Yes, what are you
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: talking about if I want his life? I don't say
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: I was that old. I'm just saying I don't at
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: this age. I don't care for my grandkids a bit.
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: I'm the hell I look like with a baby on
• 39:39
  Speaker 1: my own and case in the ass home. You can
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: only bring one at a time in my damn house,
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: one at a time. You can't. How many grandkids do
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: you have? I got eleven, and then you have you
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: have a favorite and everyone else and you make no
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: b yes, and all the other grandkids know that, oh
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: they know, they know how this go an' even lying
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: because they know how to go and acknowledge your favorite
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: grandkids in front of the run that this this cuts
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: out all the mess. If everybody gets and well, who's
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: your favorite? Now they know? Well, day, do is that
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: called a problem in the family? Or everybody know that
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: a kire is the favorite the rest of them? Maybe
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: you'll get it, maybe you won't, but a car can
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: get it anything, won't She's my favorite? Is she your
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: first grandkid? Is that why your first grandchild. It's a
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: long story, but I picked her as a favorite, and
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: we just roll with that and we don't get into
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: fights about it. You pick a favor, a favorite, how's
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: your favorite? Yes? How did you do that? Look? My
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: sister was the favorite of my mom. My mom didn't
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: speak to me to us thirteen years old. I have
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: a favorite grandchild too. You're not gonna do it. I
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: know it is, But no, don't have a favorite grand child?
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: Is Ezra? Uh oh, that's the baby that can't tell
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: because he don't know me. Yeah, he can't. He don't know.
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: You can't. He don't know me. He don't wan't none.
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: He don't talk back all the time and try to
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: hold his big ass head off. He looked at me
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: like he never seen me. He smiled, and he just
• 41:32
  Speaker 1: slobbed them. As soon as he see a bottle, his
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: whole body goes into a convulsion. It just straightened up
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: and stiff it out when he see a bottle. He
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: didn't get He just lock them all right. Coming up next,
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: it is the nephew, your favorite nephew. Steve would run
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: that prank back right after this. You're listening, all right? Nephew,
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: what you got time for the prank phone call Shirley.
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: It's time to baptize some people. It's called mobile baptismal pool.
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: Mobile baptisma. We come to you and you ignorant, You
• 42:15
  Speaker 1: come to your house and baptize. That's what we do. Hello. Hello,
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to reach a mister Wilson. How are you doing?
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: My name is brother springwater Man. Listen. We uh, we
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: we got paid to actually come by and do some
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: services to for for you by some friends of yours,
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: and we wanted to actually call and see about scheduling
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: and see what you had available. Uh, some services. What
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: y'all plan on Clenson Grass? What I do? What kind
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: of services you had? Actually, Sir, you've got some friends
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: that have actually spent a great amount of money on you.
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: And what we do is UM We have a baptismal
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: on Wheels servy and what we do is we go
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: and we um we baptize people at their home. And
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: Baptismal Wheels has been it's a new UM company, but
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: we've we've baptized over a thousand people. Now we have
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: a truck which actually has a baptismal pool on the back.
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: Of it, and we actually come to your home and
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: we will baptize you in your driveway and and make
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: you hold again. So we hostess here, brother water, brother
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: friend m again, I'm sorry, I springwater, springwater, ain't what
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: you wanted to come to my house and give me
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: a baptism in my front yard. We want to baptize
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: you right there in your drive where your friends are
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: paid for the services. And my friend, what friend will
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: pay for me to get baptized? Man, I've think baptized
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: are already well from our understanding, sir that, but then
• 43:45
  Speaker 1: that you you had some some bumps and bruises and
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: and and they seem to believe that you need to
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: be Washington coming again. I mean, that's all good, that's all,
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: that's all. It's all good. But I mean things are
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: I mean think that bad that it made? Man? I mean,
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: I've been baptize, I go to church. You know, me
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: and the Lord don't have no problems. I mean, we
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: all have setbacks. But for you to pull up with
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: your pool in front of my house to say you've
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: been a baptize me that that doesn't make any sense
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: to me. Doc. I mean, s Sometimes when some people
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: are not able to go to the house of the
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: Lord and get baptized. You know, we're making a lot
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: more convenient for you, but we can actually need no convenience.
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: I don't need no convenience. What I need convenience for
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: you asking me to come to my house on a
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: Tuesday to baptize me in my driveway? Does that make
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: any sense to you? Brother water? I mean, come on,
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: if you really sit back and think about it, does
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: that make any sense to you? Further? First of all,
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: so that that's brother spring water. But what I'm trying
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: to what I'm trying to see the water is holy water,
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: spring water. It doesn't make no difference to me. You
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: can't come to my neighborhood and baptize me in front
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: of my house. Sir? What is all that this is?
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: This is what your friends are talking about that don't
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: give it them what my players are telling you, man
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: and anybody which which one of my friends don't recommend
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: you to come to my damn out. So I'm and
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: I don't let's make that. You don't even make any
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: sense to me, you understand, So I'm not I'm not
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: at any liberty to tell you who actually importuning the
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: Liberty because of my damn house that baptized me. But
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: you can't tell me who the hell I'm gonna see you?
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: But you're not there? What's man? Come all? You don't
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: even call that makes sense for you? Dot come on?
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: That doesn't make any no where any world. I'm gonna
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: allow you to come and bring your poom in front
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: of my house. If baptize me, then I'm asking you
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: ask and you you supposed to be a pastor, you
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: supposed to be back tied, and I'm asking you, okay,
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: what's a friend of mine is sending you to you know,
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: letting you know I need to be done here at
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: Liberty to all I want to know basically you I've
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: already been paid. I'm coming. I don't take it to
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: a chair. I'm baptizing me. I baptime. I'm going to
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: baptize you. I'm Tuesday in your driveway hot tell you
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: as you come to the hot house and front of
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: my driver, you better bring the old obligation you understand.
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: You better bring the dependence the brothers, the sisters and
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: everybody heads as you think how many you got ties of?
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: This is a problem. This is what your friends are
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: talking about. This is why you need to be baptized
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: and cleansed again and washed in the blood of the lamp.
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: This is what's wrong. You need to be cleans That's
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: what's wrong with you, mister Wilton. What's problems means now,
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: what's wrong with you is called in the little my hot.
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: They're telling me I need to be back tied in
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: front of my house. If I need to be backtip,
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: don't get some oni water, I go down to the church.
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: I don't need you come in front of my house
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: looking old churkers. We are afraid of some white sheeps
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: talking about to win back athlete. That from my understands.
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: From my understanding. From my understanding, mister Wilson, you missed
• 46:45
  Speaker 1: two sound is already this month sund This so lad,
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: I can't go anywhere and get the water. I don't
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: need you coming head because you're telling how I missed
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: two dam Sundays. I don't miss this funny too, because
• 46:56
  Speaker 1: the fun out ain't coming off, sir. All I know
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: is I've been paid to do it job. I will
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: be there Tuesday morning at seven o'clock and we will
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: baptize you before you go to work on two more
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: you would I tell you what you curing my seven
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: o'clock in Lord, I swear on your Lord, I'm gonna
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: bust you. You understand me. You would not come house
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: telling me you would have backtip. Now. I don't give
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: a dam who paid you. You understand I was trying
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: your awards matter. Step down from you, your teachers, everybody else.
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: We're gonna have wool crot you. That you understand. I'm
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: a man, I'm time. All of this anger and all
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: of this, these problems you have within you. We are
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: going to burge your body and get it out your system.
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: I want your tea. I tell you what I told
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: you what Without the swing one brother, rain water, you
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: gonna get baptized on Tuesday morning. I'm gonna give a
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: dam who pays you, who called you bringing your I'm
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: gonna I can it kill you. I'm gonna trying, y'all side.
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: I got one more thing I want to say to you.
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: When you listening to God that matter, I'm busy. You
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: ain't got to say me. I gotta go understand you
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: ain't at little man. I want to say to you,
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: is you listening to me? What this is? Nephew Timmy
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: from the Steve Harby Morning Show. You just got pranked
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: by your boy Mason. Hello, man, let me check y'all something. Man,
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: Let me share you something boy, y'all, y'all was about
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: bridle man, I said, head man, I was about to
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: ask a fool on y'all because y'all would have showed
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: him by crib. You're standing me what time? Y'all ain't
• 48:33
  Speaker 1: got just better to do. Didn't sit around here and
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: just with people during their day. Man. I ain't never
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: thought y'all could give me with this They who the
• 48:45
  Speaker 1: hell goes around betide of people? All? That's like middles
• 48:49
  Speaker 1: on whill y'all baptized people with a pool on the
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: back fifty will I gotta ask you something, What is
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: the baddest radio show in the lane? Man? You know
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: it's the Steve Harvey Morning the Show. See, that's how
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: you baptize somebody forgetting going to the church now exactly
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: when they don't make it to the church. You know,
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: we bring the baptismal to you right out. Actually a
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: good idea, man, Yeah, we'll baptize you go to work
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: in the morning, yeah, and get your get your save on.
• 49:26
  Speaker 1: We get to save on right there, We cleanse you
• 49:29
  Speaker 1: right there. We won't you do it? He will and will,
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: he won't. Thank you, nep you Coming up next. Strawberry Letter.
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: My man says, I went from whop to hop. We'll
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: get into it right after this. You're listening to Steve
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. Time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and listen.
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: If you need advice on sex, on dating, on parenting, relationships, whatever,
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: write us okay and more. Submit your strawberry letter to
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: Steve Harvey FM and click submit Strawberry Letter. We'll try
• 50:08
  Speaker 1: to help you if we can. We can't help everybody.
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: If we can, we'll try, and we could be reading
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: your life like we're gonna read this one right here,
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: right now. Buggle up, hold on tight. We got it
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: for you here. It is to scroll every letter subject.
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: My man says, I went from whop to hop. All right,
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm a thirty year old mother with
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: three children. My children's father and I have been together
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: over ten years. So let me say this before you
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: bash me. He has asked me to marry him several times,
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: and I respectfully declined because we need to go to
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: therapy before we get married. Here's why my confidence is
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: at an all time low because my children's father has
• 50:55
  Speaker 1: cheated many times. Whenever I confront him, his exact words are,
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: your sex is very boring and you complain too much.
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: When the new Mega Stallion and Cardi B song came out,
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: he even joked that I've gone from walk to hop,
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: meaning I have horrible ap My response was, well, I
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: was what you said in the letter was horrible ass
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: You didn't want to say as you got to read
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: the letter like we wrote the letter out of me.
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: You didn't write. You didn't write the letter ike anyways,
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: all right, you guys got the message. My response was, well,
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't complain as much and would do a better
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: job in the bedroom if you were half the man
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: you used to be. I'm often tired from work and
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: running around with three children, so he blames me for
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: our lackluster sex life and not u ever being in
• 51:54
  Speaker 1: the mood. I've obliged him many nights and would just
• 51:57
  Speaker 1: lie there trying not to fall asleep until the sex
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: was over. But now years later and after all the cheating,
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: it has affected my ability to perform in the bedroom.
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: I've heard it's a mental thing. But I'm not sure
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: why I can't get excited or in the mood. I
• 52:12
  Speaker 1: know that if I can't please him, he's going to
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: get it somewhere else. Just recently, we got into a
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: big argument and he yelled out that I have some
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: whack a kitty. He apologized a few minutes later, But
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: this is affecting my confidence. He refuses to go to therapy,
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: So should I take my three children and leave him? Okay, listen,
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: you don't need therapy. You've mentioned therapy a few times
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: in this letter. You need a new man, that's what
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: you need. He's not deserving of you. I mean, what
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: does he do besides put you down and cheat? Ten
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: years of this, ten years of this you've been going through.
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: It has to be enough, that you know, just say enough.
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: This has to be enough for even the strongest and
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: the most confident woman wouldn't be able to deal with
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: this all the time. And here you are doing what
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: so many women do, blaming yourself. I mean, I just say,
• 53:07
  Speaker 1: life happens. Three kids in a full time job that's
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: not easy for anyone, and then he expects you to
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: perform and all of this and blah, blah blah. When
• 53:15
  Speaker 1: your man is not right, sex is the last thing
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: on your mind. Let me tell you that the only
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: thing that you're to blame for in this is staying
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: with him, in my opinion, for ten years, and for
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: taking him back repeatedly when he cheats on you. So
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: you don't give him an incentive to stop cheating or
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: anything like that. So I say to you, first things first,
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: don't worry about from whop to hop and all of
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: that right now, forget all that you can get that back.
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: He doesn't appreciate it or deserve it anyway. It's just
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: time to get back to yourself. I think you should
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: do you boo right now. Start building up, Start restoring
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: what you have allowed him to tear down in all
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: these years. Fall in love with yourself again. Start putting
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: yourself first. Okay, yourself first, and watch him take notice.
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: If not, don't be afraid to get the kids and
• 54:07
  Speaker 1: move on or put his trifling behind out. Steve, you
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: know surely I agree with every single thing you've said.
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: Great advice to this woman. Of course, my angle, it's
• 54:21
  Speaker 1: gonna be a little bit different. See, I know how
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: men operate, and what he's doing is the atypical thing
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: when a man get busted or something. Here comes the
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: reverse psychology. Yeah, here comes the why I did it?
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: You know now? Its thirty year old mother three been
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: together ten years. He's asking a marry but she's declined,
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: respectfully because she feels like they need to go to
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: counseling before they get married, because my confidence is at
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: all time low because he's cheated on her many times.
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: Wait a minute, cheated on you many times? Why are
• 55:00
  Speaker 1: you still in the relationship? The marriage part, this ain't
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: even a discussion. If a man ain't gonna act right
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: before you get married, what makes you think? What thing
• 55:14
  Speaker 1: happens that makes you think that he gonna change after
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: you getting married? Remember, like I said on this show
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: several times, a minister told me one time, when a
• 55:25
  Speaker 1: man gets married, the only thing that changes the day
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: after the wedding is the appearance of his left hand
• 55:32
  Speaker 1: third finger. That's if he is what he was before
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: you got married. Marriage doesn't change anything. Now, if a
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: person or you either practice being married or you don't.
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: You either getting ready used to cut and cut your
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: little strings out there or you a little wild old sewan.
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: Get that out the way for you get married. That's
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: how you get married. You can't be cheating on this
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: woman repeatedly, steady asking her to marry you. Marry you
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: for what? Man, are you kidding me? And then every
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: time you bust him, his exact words are, your sex
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: is very boring and you complain too much. Wait a minute,
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: that's not why you're cheating on me. You're cheating on
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: me because your ass is a low life. That's why
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: you doing it. Man. Now, when we come back, I
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: have my weight that you should handle this. All right.
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: Coming up, we'll have Parson you staying okay, oh okay.
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: At twenty three after the hour, subject of my Strawberry
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: letter for today is my man says I went from
• 56:38
  Speaker 1: wap to hop. We'll get back into it right after this.
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: You're listening show, all right, Steve, come on, let's recap
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: today's Strawberry letter. Subject my man says, I went from
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: wap to hop. This letter right here kind of hurts.
• 56:55
  Speaker 1: So Shirley gave this woman some spot on advice that
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: I agree with. Thousand per said thirty year old woman,
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: three children have been together with her man ten years,
• 57:05
  Speaker 1: and she's asked he's asked her to marry him several times,
• 57:08
  Speaker 1: but she's respectfully declined. Why you did it respectfully? I
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: don't know because I found out he wasn't treating you
• 57:14
  Speaker 1: with no respect at all. But you respectfully decline because
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: you say you need to go to therapy before you
• 57:19
  Speaker 1: getting married, because your confidence as an all time low,
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: because he has cheated on you many times. Now here's
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: the thing. When you confront him, his exact words are,
• 57:32
  Speaker 1: your sex is very boring and you complain too much.
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: Wait a minute, that's why he's cheated on you many times.
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: But he stayed with you for ten years, made three kids,
• 57:50
  Speaker 1: and he's telling you that your sex is very boring.
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: He showed keep coming over there a lot for this
• 57:57
  Speaker 1: boring sex, three kids. It's now. When the new Mad
• 58:03
  Speaker 1: Stallion and Cardi B song came out, he joked that
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: I've gone from whop to a hop hap and in
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: the words of his letter meaning I have a horrible lass.
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: P okay, not dog. Really, this is mental abuse. I
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: understand the woman's confidence being shattered. I understand that, but dog,
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: So you're gonna use reverse psychology. So you're telling this
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: woman the reason you cheat because she got bad sex.
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: Wait a minute, and then lady, Now, now you got close. Lady,
• 58:39
  Speaker 1: here's why I started to have hope for you. My
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: response was, well, I wouldn't complain as much and would
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: do a better job in the bedroom if you were
• 58:48
  Speaker 1: half the man you used to be. Na, that's why
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: I want to get that in this latter See. Oh,
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: you stinging me talking about it. I got a horrible P.
• 58:59
  Speaker 1: Let's talk about choke pe. See right now, See, if
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: you're gonna talk about my pe, then we need to
• 59:05
  Speaker 1: talk about choke pe. See. I might have a hop
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: or horrible ass P. But but you got something wrong
• 59:13
  Speaker 1: with you too, because you just saying he has to
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: man he used to be. That's a lot smaller. You're
• 59:19
  Speaker 1: scaring me. Stick. So now you gotta lap. See you
• 59:23
  Speaker 1: gotta hap. You got a horrible ass P, and he
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: gotta lap. He got a little last pe. See what
• 59:28
  Speaker 1: I mean? Then what we got to do? We were
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: we're doing initials. Now, Oh I gotta have you gotta lap,
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: you gotta no, we're here talking about each other. Pe.
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: Let's spread the pee round, make my funk the pe funk.
• 59:44
  Speaker 1: I want to get funked up. I want the bomb,
• 59:48
  Speaker 1: I want the pe funk. I want my funk funked up.
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: Make my funk the p funk. I want you to
• 59:55
  Speaker 1: get funked up. That's what you want to play the
• 59:57
  Speaker 1: next time, y'all, head to the bathroom, head to the bedroom.
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 1: I want something to happen to me. But you ain't
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: half the man you used to be, cause you the shrunk. Oh,
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: your fat ass stomach is leaning over your belt. I
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: can't find it. You can't find it now you're over
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 1: here talking about mind horrible. It's cause you little. Now
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 1: we're doing all. You can go or you can go lp.
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: You got a livesy old poker. See your poker is lousy.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: All you can be a lap You gotta you gotta
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 1: limp ass poker. See you can use We can dose
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 1: initials all day. See one thing about it, ladies. You
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: can bruise your man's ego, or were in the ego
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 1: bruising business. Yeah, you ain't as exciting in the bedroom
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 1: no more, sister, because he don't excite you. No. Yeah,
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 1: you don't need it. You need Yeah, you need to
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 1: give it to a like he giving it to you.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: It ain't what it was because you ain't what you was.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 1: You don't know what color shoes you got on? What
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: color yo shoes? You look straight down? What color your shoes?
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: You don't even know. I went through that when I
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 1: was pregnant. See you don't know that. See. But men,
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: see it's okay for a woman to do that when
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: she's pregnant. Y'all have a baby in there. But some
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 1: of us can't look down because we ain't even got
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: no baby. We just look like we're in our second
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: tribal mess. See, you got to bring this up to him.
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: You ain't got to be the only one take a shot.
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: And now, years later, after all the cheating, it's affected
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: your ability to perform in the bedroom. I've heard it's
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: a mental thing, but I'm not sure why I can't
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: get excited or in the mood. Well, let me help you.
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 1: You can't get excited because he ain't exciting you. He
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: ain't doing nothing. And when he gets there, you're about
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: to fall asleep. Now or these his kids, yeah, the
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: ain't his kids. Then it must have been good at
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: some point, That's what I said. That's what I said.
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 1: You know, and they all live kids because he because
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: he looked and he made little kids. All his kids
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 1: real little under side down there at the school. That's
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: why I ain't none on them playing basketball, none of this. See,
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 1: y'all gonna understand his ass. Now, y'all got the big
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: ass argument. Recently he yelled out that he got some
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: whack ass kitty. Then he gonna apologize a few minutes later.
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: Well you well, well you got a whack ass Well
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 1: we can't cook. No, I just said it. Well, yours
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 1: is whacked too, So we just in here, just both
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 1: serving up just bad sex. Now where you're going, You
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 1: gotta keep cheating because every time you cheat with somebody,
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 1: they don't want it no more. So you gotta go
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 1: get somebody else to cheat with. Everybody to found out
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: what I know today Strawberry Letter and Steve Harvey feminine
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 1: intagramming Facebook. Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand too.
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: You're listening, all right, Steve, introduce your friend. It's time,
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: ladies and gentlemen. Uh I just you know he's here.
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 1: No very rare I say that, but he's here. J
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 1: Anthony Brown, I'm here. I'm here, and I'm overwhelmed and
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 1: I'm fed up. Somebody given another word for climp? Is
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: that a word it's just too much for me. Yeah,
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: you ain't got no schooling for all that for clamp. Okay,
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: this shows you how serious my problem is. And the
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: problem is it's too much damn TV. I can't keep
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 1: up with all the damn shows. I don't have all
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: the cables. When I want to see something, I got
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 1: to buy something else. I thought I could see it,
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 1: But in order to see it, I got to buy
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: something I thought already bought. Again. If there's something I've
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 1: seen before and I want to see that, why I
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 1: gotta pay for it again. I saw it one time
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 1: for free. Now it costs me two damned dollars to
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 1: see that again. I've seen that, Yeah, I have that.
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 1: I've seen I've seen it. Okay, and not only that,
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 1: forget that. There's another problem. I'm recording way too much.
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: I'm DVR and I'm paying some stuff to watch later.
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 1: I'm overwhelmed. It's just too much. I have a recorder.
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: They have a brand new recorder on the market and
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 1: I'm not making it up. It records a thousand hours
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: of TV. Yeah, I'm full. I'm a full of shows
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 1: that I'm gonna have to hire somebody to come in
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 1: and watch some of the stuff so I don't get
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 1: caught up because I'm as day are watching things that
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 1: I They're watching stuff that I didn't even know it all,
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 1: and I don't. I didn't know wh Where is that?
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 1: Where is the one night in Miami? I'm in la.
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: I don't know what he me. I'm recording. I'm pushing record, record, record,
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: and it is constantly blanking. Uh. So that anybody out
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 1: there looking for a job that will watch TV for Jay,
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: that's gonna be your titling to watch shows for me,
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 1: because I'm just I'm tired. I'm tired, and I can't
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 1: watch nothing that ain't that has episodes. I can't do
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 1: it no more. I can't do episode of stuff. All right, Jake,
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 1: thank you? All right? Aun least you're giving back. Un
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 1: least you're giving back. You know you're listening morning show.
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: All right, guys, it's time for comedy roulette. Jay you
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 1: were here, please quickly set it up for us. It's
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 1: very simple. You take some subjects, put them on the wheel,
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: spun the wheel around where the wheels stop. Stop. After
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: it spuns around where it stop, we'll do the damn
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 1: thing because we just that good. Put them up. Spun
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 1: it all right? All right, ready for today's categories. Yeah yeah,
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: we're ready. All right. Here we go on number one,
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 1: Crazy stuff you might yell out during sex? Number two.
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 1: Remember we're on the air live, guys. Remember that you
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 1: want what were you allowed on that? What things you
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 1: say to bad cooks? Number three things you say? Remember? Yeah?
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 1: Number three things you say to old people to keep
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: from cursing them out? Oh my god? Oh wow, okay,
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 1: you got it three three, three times. Let's go. Let's
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 1: spin it. But my biggest fear crazy things you might
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 1: yell out during sex. Here we go. Here we go,
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 1: coming to that crazy thing you might yell out doing sex.
• 1:07:25
  Speaker 1: Gonna stop, please stop. I gotta give me some ice
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 1: water and come back. Go ahead on that, I go ahead,
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 1: crazy crazy thing we are doing sex? Oh my god,
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 1: I can't feel my eyes. Well look who's here? Look
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 1: who just showed up? Work yell that out, junior. Crazy
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 1: things you yell out doing sex? Girl? You know what
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 1: I'm I'm girl. I'm gonna miss run and buy you
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: some money. I ain't. This is too good, right you girl,
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 1: I'm a buy you some money. Ain't. Come on, Steve,
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 1: Crazy stuff is crazy stuff you might yell out drink sex,
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 1: bite me on my front end. We're playing comedy Roulette.
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 1: The subject crazy stuff you might yell out drink sex?
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 1: Come on, Jay, crazy thing you might girl? That part
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 1: is numb. Okay, it's numb. That's crazy. Crazy things you
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: might yell out say, I'm gonna vote for you. What
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 1: is like playing the things you might yell out doing sex? Oh?
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 1: Oh oh, what is your name? What is your name?
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 1: I forgot what? Tell me again? What is your name? Crazy?
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 1: Crazy stuff you might yell out during sex? Steve, I
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 1: want Corona. It's crazy that it's crazy, all right? Coming
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 1: crazy things you might yell out doing. Say what are
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 1: you planning to put that? We not over here? Ain't
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 1: crazy things you yell out to six? Oh my god,
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 1: I'm about to go to jail. What crazy thing? Crazy
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 1: things you let you yell out in the middle of sex. Uh, listen,
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 1: I'm almost at the finished land. You need to herry
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 1: up if you're trying to beat me there, I'm just
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 1: telling I'm almost I've been telling you. It's my mom
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 1: almost all right. It's comedy roulette. Crazy things you might
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 1: get out doing sexty. Just close it out. Yes, take
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 1: it out. Take it out, Betty. Black lives matter, all right.
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 1: On that note, we'll have more of the Steve Harvey
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 1: Morning Show coming up in twenty minutes right after this.
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 1: You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show. A thirty
• 1:10:49
  Speaker 1: four year old businessman from Fort Myers, Florida, was arrested
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 1: on his wedding night, On his wedding night now, for
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 1: soliciting a prostitute. He and his wife honeymooned in Tampa, Florida,
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: and just six hours, six hours after his wedding, while
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 1: his wife was asleep, he looked online for sex and
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 1: he arranged to meet a prostitute at a Tampa hotel.
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 1: When he got to the hotel, he was arrested by
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 1: an undercover detective who would post as a prostitute online.
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 1: The groom, Yes, the groom was one of one hundred
• 1:11:24
  Speaker 1: and seventy six men arrested that night in the sting.
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 1: Is that crazy? He spent his wedding night in jail
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 1: because he tried to, because he was happening on a
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 1: lot of wedding nights. The woman be so tired and
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 1: exhausted from the events. Yeah, and the planning and it
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 1: don't be the night that everybody think it's gonna be.
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 1: And so he got up and went on down there
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 1: and tried to get himself tightened up. And then that
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 1: when he got caught, what he tried to say was
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: he was a part of the sting and went down
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 1: there to show him how how people do you know?
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 1: I'm just down here trying to show him. Look y'all
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 1: to start looking out for this stuff, because this is
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 1: how easy it can happen. I am. Are you trying
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 1: to head cut me? Take your hands off for me?
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 1: I was just down he knew who this was, just
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 1: trying to help y'all. But do you think he's still
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 1: married Steve? He's in trouble because he can't get out
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 1: of this one. Now, we'll have more of the Steve
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show coming up in thirty three minutes after
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 1: we'll play a round. Would you rather right after this
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 1: you're listening to show? All right, guys, it is time
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 1: to play around of would you rather here we go?
• 1:12:39
  Speaker 1: Would you rather get away with any lie you tell?
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 1: Any lie you tell you can get away with it?
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 1: Or would you rather Hey, my whole life goal right there? Baby,
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 1: I don't I want are this is for you, junior?
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 1: Or would you rather detect any lie you here that?
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: Would you rather be able to get away with one
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 1: or be able to tell as we need them? Yeah?
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 1: All day? But don't you care someone's lying to you?
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 1: Though I can't, I would lie back, damn. Just two
• 1:13:23
  Speaker 1: liars talking. That's a good conversation to what el ball day?
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 1: We should lie to each other on a coon do
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 1: just the whole damn thing. I just want to be
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: all mine, be believable. Yeah, my whole goal in life anyway,
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 1: land Lord, thank you Jesus. I say this and she
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: fln't believe it. Yes, ray to lighting you too. I
• 1:13:49
  Speaker 1: don't give a damn. I've been lied to you before.
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 1: I can't handle it, y'all. One can't hand it. I
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 1: want the truth. I want to know the truth now.
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 1: I want what sound good? I love me? I love
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 1: you too, Thank you, baby? See them all okay' can't wait? Okay,
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 1: ain't no problem, ain't no problem? Lie to me? Yeah,
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 1: Oh my god. Oh you're the best out of head.
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 1: Thank you, baby, best out of head too? Cool? Great line. Yeah,
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 1: I love it. I'm telling you the same way. Absolutely.
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 1: Letna tell you why I surely, because men's research department
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 1: ain't good at all. We ain't research and nothing to
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 1: find out if it's the truth, No, it's true. I
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 1: don't care. Get a lot of a lot of now, okay, whatever,
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 1: all right, Well here's another one. Would you rather never
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 1: pay for taxes? Would never pay for gas? Hey? You
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 1: were gonna say that, Yeah, yeah, I'm about to hell
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 1: out this gas. Hey, hey, hey, I don't give a
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 1: damn of gas. It's thirty dollars a gallon. If I
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 1: could just get out of a yeah, all right? Would
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 1: you rather be a star of a small movie or
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 1: be an extra in a really big movie like Top Gun,
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 1: Maverick or something? Walking around? Ain't got no man, but
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 1: it's Top Gun with top crew. A small last line?
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 1: You're on the floor, you're part all right, one last
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 1: one if we have time. Would you rather German chocolate
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 1: cake or cherry hey hey, or cherry pie? Because you
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 1: know why? Because it's hard to find a good cherry path. Oh,
• 1:15:35
  Speaker 1: because I know that's what anybody know. He's slide in
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 1: my dms. Are you saying all right? All right? That's
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 1: today's rounded? Would you rather? Thanks? Guys? Coming up at
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 1: forty nine minutes after the hour, our last break of
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 1: the day and some closing remarks from the one in
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 1: at least Steve Harvey. Right after this, you're listening to
• 1:15:56
  Speaker 1: morning show Steve Harvey. You've brought your fabulous, uh very insightful,
• 1:16:01
  Speaker 1: very informal, very motivating closing remarks. Back is something that
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 1: you started years ago when you first started the Steve
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show, and people have grown to love them
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 1: and you know to live by them and be inspired
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: by them. So what do you have for us here today?
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 1: A real good piece of motivation and makes your quest
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 1: to become successful a little bit simpler. You know, oftentimes
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 1: people are stuck in a rut because they can't think
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 1: they way clear to see the end result. What I
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 1: mean by is, some people make such lofty goals and
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 1: then they sit there without a plan of attack to
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 1: achieve that lofty goal until they've created a goal that
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 1: seems so daunting that they don't even start the process
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 1: of a trying to accomplish it. For example, And this
• 1:16:51
  Speaker 1: doesn't have to be the case. I'm just using this
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 1: as an example. Let's say you want to be a
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 1: millionaire and you say, wow, I want to make a
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 1: million dollars, and then you start thinking of how to
• 1:17:02
  Speaker 1: make the million dollars, and because you can't, it becomes
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 1: so daunting. Making a million dollars is difficult. If it
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 1: were easy, wouldn't you do it by Friday? Wouldn't you?
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 1: Of course you would. But it's a little more difficult
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 1: than that. So here's what I had to learn in
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 1: my life. Everybody listening to this was born with a gift.
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 1: It's inside of you. Because God is very fair, he
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 1: didn't put it on a mountaintop, he didn't hide it
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 1: under a rock. It's in you. And your gift is
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 1: the thing that you do to absolute best with the
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 1: least amount of effort. In that lies your greatest chance
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 1: for success. There's a scripture that says your gift will
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 1: make room for you and put you in the presence
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 1: of great men. Let's just look at the first part
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 1: of that, your gift will make room for you. My
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 1: interpretation of that has meant what my gift has done
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 1: for me. It has allowed me to spread out, it
• 1:18:05
  Speaker 1: has taken me places I never dreamed at. Goal your
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 1: gift will do the same thing for you. So now
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 1: let's just talk about your ability to get to the million.
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 1: I think it's what your gift, because if that's what
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 1: that he gave you and instill that you at birth,
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 1: was to make room for you, here's your chance. Now
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 1: how do I do that? Steve? I call it to
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 1: maximize your effort by ten theory. It's just something I
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 1: came up with driving when I was home listening, coming
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 1: up with how to make it, and I discovered something.
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 1: All of you have something that some would pay you
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 1: ten dollars to do. Some of you paint, some of
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 1: you teach, some of you babysit tutors. Some of you
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 1: work with your hands. Some of you can sing, some
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 1: of you can choreograph. Some of you it's so many things.
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 1: Cut grass, play the pianos, some of you do something.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 1: Some of y'all work on cars, some of y'all drive.
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 1: But all of you have something that you will do
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 1: that someone will give you ten dollars to do. All
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 1: of you have something that someone will pay you ten
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 1: dollars to because you do something that someone else can't do.
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 1: So now all you gotta do instead of trying to
• 1:19:17
  Speaker 1: figure out how to make a million dollars, it's go
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 1: make the ten dollars that you're able to make. Once
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 1: you make that ten dollars, I want you to do
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 1: it ten more times. When you do it ten more times,
• 1:19:26
  Speaker 1: you now have one hundred dollars. Once you have a
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 1: hundred dollars, it's very simple. Do the same thing you
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 1: did to make thee hundred dollars ten more times. You
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 1: now have one thousand dollars. See, you don't have to
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 1: keep thinking of something else to do. Just keep doing
• 1:19:39
  Speaker 1: the same thing that you've been doing. Just do it.
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 1: Multiply the effort. It's the effort that maximizes and brings
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 1: about the fruition of what your life can be. So,
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 1: if you make a thousand dollars and you do that
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 1: ten more times, I have news for you. Now have
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 1: ten thousand dollars. Now Now, in order to make a
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 1: one hundred thousand, you might need a little bit of help.
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 1: You might need a high somebody that help you do
• 1:20:01
  Speaker 1: the thing that you do. But if you make ten
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 1: thousand dollars and you do what you did to make
• 1:20:05
  Speaker 1: ten thousand dollars, which is the same thing you did
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 1: to make ten dollars, if you do it ten more times,
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 1: you now have a hundred thousand dollars. Now, listen to me,
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 1: my friends. Once you have one hundred thousand dollars, I
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 1: could assure you you are going to need help because
• 1:20:20
  Speaker 1: in order to maximize one hundred thousand dollars, you have
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 1: to have some like minded people around you. Nobody gets
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 1: to the top alone. Nobody becomes successful and wealthy by themselves.
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 1: They form partnerships, relationships, they get employees. But once you
• 1:20:34
  Speaker 1: make a hundred thousand dollars doing the same thing you
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 1: did to make ten dollars, if you do it ten
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 1: more times, I have news for you, my friends. Congratulations,
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 1: you have just made one million dollars with a ten
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 1: dollar idea. Stop trying to figure out how to make
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 1: the million. What all you gotta do is take your
• 1:20:51
  Speaker 1: ten dollars gift that God has put in you. It's
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 1: a million dollars gift that you have. You just haven't
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 1: broken it down inch by inch. Anything's a sinch, and
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 1: maximize the efforts. That's how you become successful. These jokes
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 1: that pay me what I make now, it's the same
• 1:21:06
  Speaker 1: jokes that pay me twenty five dollars a night. They're
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 1: the same jokes. It's all English. This is not in
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 1: another language. I don't know no more words now than
• 1:21:17
  Speaker 1: I knew then. I've taken these twenty five dollars jokes
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 1: and I maximize them over and over and over and
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 1: over and over and over and over. It's the same
• 1:21:29
  Speaker 1: jokes I was telling babysitters who charge fifty dollars to
• 1:21:34
  Speaker 1: watch kids. Babysitters end up opening up daycare centers. Daycare
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 1: centers turned into franchises, crim Dela, crim Monastory schools. These
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 1: are national franchises. Somebody was just babysitting. My partner used
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 1: to cut grass. First three dollars in the front, three
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 1: dollars in the back. He got a landscape, come to Cleveland.
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 1: He made four million dolls a year. You know what
• 1:22:01
  Speaker 1: he do? He cut grass, same six dollar grass cutn't
• 1:22:04
  Speaker 1: he been doing? You? Check out some trucks. Now, what
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 1: is it that you do that somebody will pay you
• 1:22:10
  Speaker 1: ten dollars that you can maximize your effort for and
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 1: turn it into your million. But trying to figure out
• 1:22:15
  Speaker 1: how to make the million, take your ten dollars skills
• 1:22:18
  Speaker 1: set and start hammering it and beating it and working
• 1:22:22
  Speaker 1: it and grinding and hustling and multiplying and magnifying it
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 1: and you will make a million dollars. That's my closing remarks.
• 1:22:29
  Speaker 1: Thank y'all very much. Thanks all right now For all
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 1: Steve Harvey contests, no purchase necessary, void ware prohibited. Participants
• 1:22:48
  Speaker 1: must be legal US residents at least eighteen years old,
• 1:22:51
  Speaker 1: unless otherwise stated. For complete contest rules, visit Steve Harvey
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 1: fm dot com. You're listening to show