Latest / Neighbourly: Real Stories of Care and Community / Differently Wired | Embracing Discomfort in Community With Tracy Upham
Transcript
- 0:02What does loving your neighbor actually look like? This
- 0:06is Journey with Care, where curious Canadians get inspired to
- 0:10love others well through real life stories and honest
- 0:13conversations.
- 0:20Hey, it's Johan. Before we get into this interview, I just wanted to let you
- 0:23know that we've had some technical issues with this interview.
- 0:27The Internet was cutting out. So there might be parts of this
- 0:31interview that feel a little bit choppy, but the content was really
- 0:35good. So I encourage you just to look past that and listen to our
- 0:39guest's story. Now onto our conversation with Tracy.
- 0:42Welcome, fellow sojourners, to another curious episode of
- 0:45Journey with Care. I'm on with our co host Wendi
- 0:50Park. Hey, everyone. We are in the midst of our series differently wired in
- 0:53community, and we have another special guest on today. But before we
- 0:57get to that, I wanna remind you that we have another podcast called Journey
- 1:01with Prayer. You can find it now on your favorite podcast player
- 1:04or get early episodes on our website journey with care dot
- 1:08c a slash podcast. You can find it all there. I encourage you to
- 1:12subscribe. And, again, make sure you're sharing this series with friends,
- 1:16family, church members, people in your small groups. These are such
- 1:19important conversations that we believe will bless the body of
- 1:23Christ. Yeah. I've heard so many things, Johan, from people that have been
- 1:26listening and following along with our differently wired and community
- 1:30series that it's easy to share with people, having
- 1:33those conversations, hearing from people that have come through these experience,
- 1:37that are living in these experiences, and it's an easy way
- 1:41to generate conversations, healthy conversations in their
- 1:44communities, in their families, in their threads. I've
- 1:48been seeing that being shared, which is really lovely,
- 1:52and we just want to help people understand
- 1:56neurodiversities, disabilities, mental illness. This series
- 1:59isn't a clinical, place where we're diagnosing
- 2:03people, putting labels, but we're inviting people to share their stories. So
- 2:06for those of you who have been following, you will know that we've been talking
- 2:10about navigating neurodiversities and exceptionalities within
- 2:14the church and community. And how do we do that? How do we really care
- 2:17and create inclusivity and belonging for everyone? We've been
- 2:21talking about autism, bipolar, ADHD. There's so many
- 2:25things there that I know listeners have been
- 2:29blessed by, and we are not disappointing
- 2:32today because today in studio, we have Tracy
- 2:36Upham. She's actually one of our trainers, our trauma trainers on
- 2:40inner team coming from the Hamilton area. And so,
- 2:43Tracy, welcome to the podcast. Hi. Well, we love
- 2:47having our conversations with you, and I'm so excited to share your
- 2:51voice and your experience kids
- 2:56with
- 3:00kids with exceptionalities, living with kids, parenting,
- 3:04ministering to people with exceptionalities. Can you tell us a little bit
- 3:08about yourself and what ties you into this topic of
- 3:11differently wired in community? Sure. For the last about
- 3:1513 years, my husband and I have been foster parents. And
- 3:19the last 6 or 7 years of that,
- 3:23specifically have had kids placed in our home who have had
- 3:26significant challenges, intellectual disabilities, fetal
- 3:30alcohol spectrum disorder. We've done some relief for kiddos who have autism. And
- 3:34so just kind of as our journey has
- 3:37progressed, we have kind of
- 3:41unintentionally found ourselves in
- 3:44this place where we are often caring for kids who have special needs.
- 3:49Yeah. It's interesting. We often don't necessarily know what we don't know,
- 3:52and yet when we find ourselves in situations, we have to get curious.
- 3:56Right? When those those kids came into your life, you
- 4:00needed to educate yourself. They were educating you on the things
- 4:04you didn't know. You didn't find that in a parenting how to
- 4:08book, did you? Definitely not. Definitely not. And I can
- 4:12look back now and see the ways that
- 4:15I think God has both gifted and prepared
- 4:19Keith, my husband, and I for what happens in our
- 4:22house. But I don't know that I always felt
- 4:26that in the moment that those experiences were
- 4:30happening. But, yeah, I I mean, I think as a foster parent,
- 4:34even for our kiddos who come into our homes who don't
- 4:37necessarily have a diagnosed neurodiversity
- 4:40that you could, you know, put a label on, even
- 4:44just the experience of attachment disruption
- 4:48and and trauma, those already kind of create sort
- 4:52of like a a I mean, I kind of talk about how I think all
- 4:55kids who are part of the child welfare system probably fit into that
- 4:59special needs population because they do need to be
- 5:02parented in a different way. They do have experiences Right. That
- 5:06have possibly made it so that traditional parenting is not
- 5:10going to be effective or going to be as helpful.
- 5:14Specifically, the last couple of years, seeing how intellectual
- 5:18disabilities or executive functioning challenges in, you know, fetal alcohol
- 5:21spectrum or something like that mesh with that
- 5:25trauma experience or that attachment disruption can
- 5:29be really interesting and can create some
- 5:33real complexities. I find that sometimes
- 5:36the information that you're getting from a population of,
- 5:40you know, parents who are caring for a child who has
- 5:44autism, let's say, or Down syndrome or some sort of intellectual disability who
- 5:48they have raised since birth and there hasn't been any attachment difficulty.
- 5:52Sometimes that advice doesn't quite fit, but then also sometimes some of the
- 5:55trauma stuff doesn't quite fit either because not only are they
- 5:59experiencing trauma, but they also then have these intellectual
- 6:03challenges or these executive functioning challenges that
- 6:06can make that part really tricky. And so we're always trying to kind of
- 6:10figure out, okay, what's the best way for us to meet these
- 6:14kids where they where they are, and who has
- 6:17God made them, and how can we look to him
- 6:21to kind of figure out, okay. God, how would you have us lead these kids?
- 6:24How would you have us love them? How would you have us care for them?
- 6:26What does it look like? What's the best thing for them? And that
- 6:30has not always been the same. And so there's been a lot of learning to
- 6:33to be flexible and a lot of learning to to be flexible and a lot
- 6:35of learning to to ask for wisdom. But I do think that we've also, throughout
- 6:39the last, you know, 13 years, I think that we have also picked up some
- 6:43skills and hopefully are a little bit better at what we do than we were,
- 6:46you know, 13 years ago. That's my hope by least. Well, you've said a lot
- 6:49of good things there, and and children are often the best
- 6:53educators Wendi we listen and we lean in. How do we connect?
- 6:57And you raised something interesting, not only the intellectual disabilities
- 7:01or or the challenges and the complexities, but the trauma piece,
- 7:05it does change the biology and the neurology of the brain. Right?
- 7:09And so then how do we work with those wirings if there's there's
- 7:12levels of healing that can be found? But I love that you
- 7:16bring your experience into our trauma care training,
- 7:20and helping people connect well with people that
- 7:24are differently wired based on trauma. When something
- 7:28triggers them, how do we deescalate the brain so you can have that
- 7:31connection? You've had a lot of experience. You also came in with experience
- 7:35from a ministry perspective. Right? Through a church ministry,
- 7:39pastoral staff role with children. Can you tell me a
- 7:43little bit how that has informed some of your perspective
- 7:46on neurodiversities, intellectual disabilities within the
- 7:50church setting. Yeah. I don't think there's a time in my
- 7:54life, at least prior to maybe 10 years old, that I
- 7:57haven't been involved in taking care of kids
- 8:01or working with kids or whatever. Like, that that's been a given
- 8:04from a very, very young age. But, yeah, through university, I moved to
- 8:08Hamilton because that's not where I'm from originally, and I worked, at
- 8:12the church that we still attend as their children family
- 8:15minister. And it is a church that is in kind of a higher
- 8:19needs area of the city. We had a lot of
- 8:23kiddos who just life was hard. There was a lot
- 8:26of of toxic stress, a lot of uncertainty. So
- 8:30this the church story that we are at, there is a school
- 8:34directly behind it. And so it was becoming really important to the congregation
- 8:38that they engage with this school, this, you know, 800
- 8:41plus kids, because this is not a small school, it's a very large school.
- 8:45How do we engage with this, you know, 800 plus group of kids?
- 8:49So very early on, one of the things that we saw was as we started
- 8:52to engage with kids, they would show up on Sunday morning,
- 8:56but they had no concept of what a Sunday morning church
- 9:00experience would look like. And so sometimes, they would bring families with
- 9:04them, but sometimes, they would just kind of show up. And so I think that
- 9:07our congregation had to kind of learn pretty quickly
- 9:12how to be welcoming to disruption,
- 9:15how to be okay with explaining to this child in the
- 9:19middle of the service, like why we were taking communion
- 9:22or why people are raising their hands while they're
- 9:25singing or all of these different pieces. And so, I
- 9:29mean, we did have a Sunday school program that they would go to for part
- 9:32of the time. But still today, our kids start
- 9:36their their Sunday with us in the service, and we worship together.
- 9:40And so that was kind of an introduction to our church
- 9:44to kind of be a little bit to be a little bit okay with
- 9:48being maybe uncomfortable with things not looking the way that
- 9:52maybe always had looked or people kind of thought that they they looked.
- 9:55And there were challenges with that for sure.
- 9:59But I look back now, well, almost 20 years
- 10:03ago, and I really think that
- 10:07those kids kind of broke us in, in a
- 10:10lot of ways to being a lot
- 10:14more comfortable with taking ourselves less
- 10:18seriously, not having this really, like, formalized idea of you need
- 10:21to be quiet, and you need to sit in this place, and don't speak. And
- 10:25I see that now because now our congregation has such
- 10:29an interesting population of
- 10:32adults who have, developmental disabilities, or we have a
- 10:36young man who has autism that worships
- 10:42with us, and they are beautiful. They are sometimes hilarious. You know,
- 10:46sometimes they'll make comments or they'll kind of
- 10:50shout something out in the middle of service, and it's normally
- 10:53fantastic. It's normally the thing that everybody is thinking and nobody wants to
- 10:56say. Yeah. And they have been such a blessing
- 11:00to us. Well, that is really neat to hear, Tracy,
- 11:04because not only have children impacted how you parent and
- 11:07interact with children, but it sounds like as your
- 11:11church welcomed and created space and colored outside the lines a
- 11:15bit in creating space for for children with
- 11:18exceptionalities and differences that it has
- 11:22taught the church. It has influenced the church in how
- 11:26you all operate together, how you function and create space for
- 11:30each other. What do you think have been some of
- 11:33those key things that have created that safety for children to be
- 11:37children, for adults with exceptionalities to
- 11:41to just be their whole selves with you. What are some of
- 11:45those things that have created that ability
- 11:49to be themselves within a a diverse
- 11:52congregation? I should say to start that our church is a
- 11:56pretty small group. So we're probably about 60
- 11:59people maybe on a Sunday morning, and I think that that
- 12:04matters in that there's kind of an
- 12:07expectation if you're around for
- 12:12more than a couple weeks, you are going to know
- 12:16several people. Right? Like, it's not the type of place that's huge, and
- 12:20so you can show up for a couple weeks without really meeting a lot of
- 12:24people. You're gonna meet someone very quickly within
- 12:27coming through the door. And if you're there for more than, you know, 1 or
- 12:312 weeks, you're going to meet even more people. And so I think that that's
- 12:35part of it is just the the commitment to
- 12:39welcoming one another, to touching base with new faces. And because we're small,
- 12:42we can see those new faces very, very easily. Yeah. I think for
- 12:46a long time, our church has kind of represented
- 12:50our neighborhood in that there's a very
- 12:54diverse group of people already, so
- 12:58a very diverse group in terms of socioeconomic status for
- 13:01sure. And that has been decades that that has been the
- 13:05case. And so I I think that there's already this sense
- 13:09of people from different places that other than the
- 13:12church wouldn't really come together, and
- 13:16already kind of journeying together and being like, oh, you
- 13:20have something to bring to the table. And so I think as that
- 13:23has grown to include more recently
- 13:28kids and adults who have developmental disabilities or,
- 13:32you know, whatever kind of special needs. I think that that has laid
- 13:36a good foundation. We also have some really lovely
- 13:40parents, and, I mean, we do have some child like childcare
- 13:43providers, EAs, teachers who have a really good head on
- 13:47their shoulders around kids development, but
- 13:51also just, like, how important it is for kids to be able to
- 13:55be kids and for kids to be celebrated. And even some of
- 13:59our older members who aren't raising children
- 14:02anymore, but have this real
- 14:06commitment to our kids,
- 14:09especially, and wanting them to know Jesus, but
- 14:13wanting them to know Jesus in a way that works for them and not re
- 14:17like, recognizing that they're not necessarily going to just sit in one
- 14:21place quietly and, you know, receive.
- 14:24So it's not uncommon in our church to kind of see
- 14:28different kids dancing in the aisles or, you know,
- 14:32there are kids that are helping do actions for songs or singing songs.
- 14:36It's not uncommon for kids to kind of
- 14:40come and, like, go throughout even the first part of the
- 14:44service while they're together. And so that's kind of just
- 14:48created an environment of, okay, this is a place where I can bring my
- 14:51kids who might struggle with a sense of, oh, you need to sit
- 14:55still and you need to listen and you can't speak and you
- 14:59can't ever smile. I don't I don't know. That's probably a
- 15:02terrible example of what church looks like anywhere. But I think
- 15:06sometimes we get these ideas of, like, the
- 15:09perfect Christian kid is this, like, such a
- 15:13heavily behaviorist model. And and not only that, but the
- 15:17parents too, that we have this perfect image of how a
- 15:20good parent raises their children and you all sit still and be a
- 15:24Pinterest family down the pew. Right? Where those
- 15:28pressures come from, who knows? But I I like what you
- 15:31said, though. Like, I think that that rings true for all humanity.
- 15:35When I see somebody else bear their whole self in
- 15:39front of others and be accepted and welcomed and
- 15:43treated with love and dignity, I'm more likely
- 15:47to drop my mask and say, you know what? When you ask me
- 15:50how am I doing and I say I'm struggling right now, I'm gonna be more
- 15:54vulnerable, feel more safe to be my authentic self
- 15:58or to share, like, I like to do this quirky thing. You know?
- 16:01I believe that we might all come in with different exceptionalities
- 16:05or different circumstances. But when we see that emulated,
- 16:09when a person with Down syndrome is dancing in the front
- 16:13or somebody with FASD is is
- 16:17helping with the children, But when I see those things incorporated,
- 16:21then I think, well, maybe my children with these exceptionalities
- 16:25or myself with these types of conditions can also be
- 16:29welcome. And so we can create that belonging without
- 16:32all having cookie cutter same circumstances because we're all
- 16:36different. Right? Yeah. There's one woman specifically that I'm thinking
- 16:40about. I mean, I don't know if she has a specific diagnosis or whatever, but
- 16:43I know there's definitely some sort of, I don't know if it's, like,
- 16:47a mild intellectual disability or or what. And she will every
- 16:51week, she will offer you a mint, and she will ask you, like, how are
- 16:54you doing? And she she does. She wants a real answer,
- 16:58and she will immediately ask if she can pray for you.
- 17:02And then she will remind you of the things that are true about
- 17:06God. And so she will give you a hug, and she will tell you God
- 17:09loves you. God is with you. You need to trust him. Like,
- 17:12all of these things that sounds like potentially
- 17:16simple things because I make Christianity really
- 17:20complicated in my head. So, Tracy, how
- 17:24have these experiences with this woman that has
- 17:27a woman that has blessed you, with your children,
- 17:31the the people that you have been working with in your congregation in
- 17:35a pastoral role. But now as a congregation member coming with your
- 17:38family, how has the how have
- 17:42these experiences impacted your own faith and
- 17:46understanding of God? You you've mentioned that it simplified
- 17:50your theology in in some ways of of not making
- 17:54it so complicated. What other ways have you been
- 17:58impacted? Yeah. God has definitely used the
- 18:01example of both adults and kiddos who
- 18:05maybe have different, neurodiversities or
- 18:08special needs to teach me a lot about places
- 18:12where I was believing things that weren't true. Or even
- 18:16if I said out loud, oh, yeah. Like, I believe that God
- 18:20loves me and that God, isn't waiting for me to, like, have
- 18:23everything figured out. But the way that I was living was still very
- 18:27much a, oh, I need to have everything figured out. And so especially
- 18:30so we just recently, adopted 2 of the
- 18:34kiddos that we had been fostering. And so they lived with us for years,
- 18:38but they were just placed with us on adoption in March. And
- 18:42part of the last several years of
- 18:46just getting to know them and and love them, and especially as we kind
- 18:50of started to think about adoption and see them
- 18:53as part of our family, thinking about, okay, what does
- 18:57it look like to disciple these kiddos
- 19:01who, you know, don't necessarily always
- 19:05look like what comes to my mind maybe.
- 19:09And and I'm not saying that that's a good picture. I'm not saying that,
- 19:12yeah, I think that that is a poor picture that I have, and that's
- 19:16not not healthy. But, you know, my kiddos
- 19:20really struggle with impulse control. They really struggle with executive functioning. They
- 19:23struggle with emotional regulation. Mhmm. Sometimes when they get mad, the things that
- 19:27come out of their mouth are pretty ugly. Sometimes when I get mad, the things
- 19:30that come out of my mouth are pretty ugly, and that's not something that
- 19:34we normally talk about. And so having to sit and say,
- 19:38okay. God, if I believe that you
- 19:42made these kiddos, And, yeah, some things
- 19:45happened that were not in your original plan for the
- 19:49world, but I also have to believe that at this
- 19:53point in my kids' lives, this is how you've created
- 19:56them. And so what what does it mean for them to love and to
- 20:00follow you when they might struggle with all
- 20:04sorts of different behaviors as kiddos? But even as adults, like, looking for like, they're
- 20:07at risk for a lot of things that, you know,
- 20:11from your typical, like, Sunday school ideas are
- 20:14not what a Christian adult looks like. And that
- 20:18was challenging for me. But I think that God has used that
- 20:22to strip away all of the sense of presenting this
- 20:26this religious self and just saying, like, it is it is not about that. Like,
- 20:30it is about loving god. And and I see that in my
- 20:34kids. Even now, you know, they're 8 and they're 10. But, man, my 8 year
- 20:37old, she loves Jesus. And, yeah, like, there are
- 20:41things that she struggles with, and there's things where she'll say, oh,
- 20:45mommy, it's hard to follow Jesus. It
- 20:49sure is, girl. Amen. Amen. But, man,
- 20:52like, she she loves Jesus, and Yeah. And I can see
- 20:56it. And so I think that that has been such
- 20:59a gift, such a necessary work in me because God has used that
- 21:03stripping away to then say, okay, Trace. I'm not all that
- 21:07impressed or concerned. Like, I, you know, you've got all this stuff that you're trying
- 21:11to prove and you're doing and whatever and, like, cool. Yeah. That's
- 21:14not what it's about. And so would you let
- 21:18me love you? And would you, you know, take a breath for
- 21:22a minute? Yeah. That has been the biggest
- 21:26gift. It has not been comfortable, but it has
- 21:29been so good and such a shift
- 21:33in my understanding of Jesus. Well, I think that's so encouraging,
- 21:37Tracy, because I think that will bring bring a lot of,
- 21:41encouragement to other parents and other people, maybe
- 21:45even living with exceptionalities. And even
- 21:48when we love Jesus and your daughter
- 21:53expressing her love for Jesus, but that doesn't take
- 21:56away some of the intellectual disabilities
- 22:00or if there's FASD involved. There is changes within the
- 22:04brain, things that have happened or things that are part of their brain
- 22:07that doesn't take away those challenges.
- 22:11And I think there's something there that we need to to
- 22:15pay attention to in what you just said that though
- 22:19we struggle in this world, it doesn't take
- 22:23away from your daughter's value when
- 22:26impulse control is one of those things or outbursts or or
- 22:30or different challenges that she's facing. She can love Jesus and
- 22:34still be challenged there physiologically,
- 22:38and god doesn't see her as less than because she
- 22:41can't sit still. He says, let the children come and don't
- 22:45hinder, and you have been navigating. You said it's not easy,
- 22:49right, to not let those things hinder her from
- 22:52loving Jesus and feeling welcomed and included. I think
- 22:56there's there's a lot that we can learn in the church. And how have you
- 23:00navigated discomfort? You could have chosen
- 23:04not to raise these children. You could have chosen not to go forward with
- 23:07permanency and adoption. You could have chosen to go to a
- 23:11different church where it's neat and tidy and perfect, quote,
- 23:14unquote. Why have you chosen that difficult path?
- 23:18And help us understand what navigating
- 23:22difficulty looks like to be faithful. Yeah. I think
- 23:25it's been a a struggle for me because somewhere
- 23:29along the line, I picked up an idea
- 23:33that life should be relatively
- 23:37easy, and that things that were supposed to happen
- 23:41would, like, kind of happen, you know, naturally or without a
- 23:45lot of of effort. And I I don't really know where that necessarily
- 23:49comes from, but suffering and discomfort
- 23:53have been the main places where Jesus has met me. And so
- 23:57it kind of very quickly came to the point of like,
- 24:00well, this is uncomfortable, and I don't really like it.
- 24:04But I also cannot argue that these are the places where Jesus is
- 24:08showing up in my life. And, I mean, there have been times where I'm like,
- 24:10I don't wanna do this. I'm done. Like, I wanna cut myself
- 24:14off completely from all things. But I
- 24:17also am so aware that that would be not what
- 24:21Jesus has for me at all. And so I think
- 24:25a lot of the last 5 years, especially, have been
- 24:28learning again and again and again that
- 24:32life is not supposed to be easy, and that just because something's hard
- 24:36doesn't mean that it's bad. That often, the things that are
- 24:39most important to God require
- 24:43yeah. Like, intentionality, I guess I'll say, because that's the one that's doing
- 24:47the work, but we need to be intentional. And so I think that
- 24:50one of the things that, as a society, we're not necessarily great at is staying
- 24:54in those places of uncomfort or discomfort and of suffering. So, I
- 24:58mean, I think community has been a huge part of that. Like, we are very,
- 25:01very blessed to have, other Christian
- 25:05families around us who are living lives that look
- 25:09different than what they anticipated they would. I think that
- 25:13there has been a journey of having to grieve some of the
- 25:16things that I thought life would look like. And in that
- 25:20grief, God has allowed me to be a
- 25:24little bit more comfortable Johan in in some of those places where
- 25:27before I really wasn't. And I think just in the last
- 25:31couple of years, in my own personal life, looking at some spiritual
- 25:35disciplines that really set me in intentionally at looking at, okay,
- 25:39what is God doing? What has God done in the past? What has God done,
- 25:42you know, last week, and how am I seeing him at work? I think
- 25:46that those things have allowed me to stay in the discomfort
- 25:49because there is just no denying that it is the
- 25:53place which where Jesus is.
- 25:57Well and I can testify, Tracy, that I see Christ in
- 26:01you and you choosing discomfort, you choosing
- 26:04to work across your own comfort lines
- 26:08has made you into a better, more Jesus
- 26:12like person. And now not only are you
- 26:16being willing to be discomforted, you are being driven
- 26:19to into places that often churches find
- 26:23discomforting, and you are training up churches to enter into the
- 26:27people's distress in a in honoring and dignifying way.
- 26:30And I love that that not only God has been doing that in
- 26:34you and making you a wonderful person. I love having coffee with you when
- 26:38I Wendi I'm down in Ontario and just feeling
- 26:41that from you. But you are now in introducing that
- 26:45into churches, into camps, into ministries so that they
- 26:49too can enter in with a few skills and tools that you have picked up
- 26:52and our team has picked up along the way, and you are blessing
- 26:56many other people. So, Tracy, I was wondering if you
- 26:59could invite us, invite our listeners, invite
- 27:03me into what that process could look like to enter into
- 27:07discomfort. What can I be learning? Why should I do it?
- 27:10Tell me a little bit more about what we can be learning
- 27:14by being inclusive and embracing differences
- 27:18and getting out of our comfort. Well, I think one of the lessons
- 27:22that I kind of already, you know, alluded to was that Jesus
- 27:25is in the hard places. And so, yeah,
- 27:29I think being uncomfortable is often
- 27:33a part of the package. And
- 27:37so I think the church in North America
- 27:40kind of has picked up these different ideas that I'm not sure
- 27:44are actually kind of gospel truths.
- 27:48They're kind of more cultural. But we we live in a world that
- 27:52is so dressed about
- 27:55independence, about personal success, about
- 27:59doing everything and having everything and being
- 28:03everything. And I think the lesson is
- 28:06that we are called to be a community. We are not called to be
- 28:10individuals doing our own things on our own strength. Like, that was never
- 28:14the purpose. But whatever it is that you do,
- 28:18do it. Do it to please God and do it, to bring
- 28:22glory to him. And so I think that it gets us outside of kind of
- 28:26our, like, North American culture of this is the way life is
- 28:29supposed to look. So I think that that gives us an
- 28:33opportunity to live differently and to to be
- 28:36uncomfortable, for sure. Those are the places that I've met Jesus the most.
- 28:40And so I think that is the thing for the church, to be transformed by
- 28:44the Holy Spirit, to offer a different gospel to
- 28:48our culture as well because, you know, I don't think that those
- 28:52things are necessarily healthy for our culture all the time. And so what does
- 28:55the church have to offer to the world around us? A
- 28:59lot of what we have to offer are, are actually some of those lessons that
- 29:03I've been learning from my kids and from the adults at church
- 29:06who, you know, from the world's perspective, they don't really have anything
- 29:10to offer. Like they're kind of they they've kind of been shoved into a place
- 29:11of, well, they're receiving care from someone somewhere,
- 29:17but they're not expected to bring anything to the table. And I would say that
- 29:21the exact opposite is true. They bring so much to the table, and I've been
- 29:24so blessed, and so challenged in
- 29:28how I live out my own faith by their examples.
- 29:32Yeah. That is so powerful, Tracy. Yeah. And don't
- 29:35we all theologically, we should know this. But
- 29:39are we practicing? Don't we all need each other and need
- 29:43God To to learn from people who might
- 29:46be considered church projects or people to be cared
- 29:50for, but to be actually receiving lessons from
- 29:53God through individuals who understand their
- 29:57need for community, who want to contribute and be part of
- 30:01it, not based on intellectuality or or all these things that
- 30:04we might esteem in the world that kinda qualifies us in.
- 30:08But that we are all made in the image of God. We are all needing
- 30:12community, and God has value and
- 30:16purpose and plans for each one of us lived out in
- 30:19community. Tracy, this has been a wonderful conversation, and I'm so grateful that
- 30:23you were able to share your experiences, how God has
- 30:27been challenging you, and I I believe it's a challenge for each one of us.
- 30:31Is there any last comment that you would like to to put out there,
- 30:35before we conclude this episode? Yeah. I think I'd love to go in a
- 30:38slightly different direction, but speak to
- 30:43people who are parenting kiddos who have neurodiversities,
- 30:47because sometimes that can be a really
- 30:51challenging and a really lonely journey. And so I think I would
- 30:54just want to encourage them to keep
- 30:58looking for places where their family can be
- 31:02celebrated, to know that their kiddos are, are made in
- 31:05the image of God and to know that, man,
- 31:10hard stuff is often the places where Jesus meets
- 31:13us, that we can't do things on our own strength, but that
- 31:17God gives us the Holy Spirit. And yeah, to
- 31:21maybe be free to take off some of
- 31:24the mental baggage of what our kids should be able to do or
- 31:28what our kids should look like and to, to really
- 31:32see if we can look for,
- 31:36God, what is it that you are teaching me through these kids?
- 31:40Or, you know, what gift have you given them
- 31:43for the church or for our family or for
- 31:47our community? Because I I know that that can be
- 31:51a really hard road to to walk. That is so good. Thank
- 31:55you so much, Tracy, for coming on. Encouragement for our listeners,
- 31:58we've heard some great feedback on this series so far, and I encourage
- 32:02you to share it with others. Share it in your churches. Share
- 32:06it with your friends, small groups. These are important discussions
- 32:09that we really believe are important for the church
- 32:13to really rally around, and they make for great discussions with your friends and
- 32:17family around the table. We still have some more interviews for you, so
- 32:21keep following along with us. Thank you
- 32:24for joining another conversation on Journey with Care, where we
- 32:28inspire curious Canadians on their path of faith and living life
- 32:32with purpose in community. Journey with Care is an initiative of
- 32:36Care Impact, a Canadian charity dedicated to connecting and equipping
- 32:40the whole church to journey well in community. You can visit their
- 32:43website at careimpact. Ca, or visit journeywithcare. Ca to
- 32:47get more information on weekly episodes, Journey With and
- 32:51details about our upcoming events and meetups. You can also leave
- 32:55us a message, share your thoughts, and connect with like minded
- 32:58individuals who are on their own journeys of faith and purpose.
- 33:02Thank you for sharing this podcast and helping these stories reach the community.
- 33:06Together, we can explore ways to journey in a good way. And
- 33:09always remember to stay curious.