Latest / No Latency / NL: SideQuest - Bubble Trouble - Pt3 Pop the Potty

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NL: SideQuest - Bubble Trouble - Pt3 Pop the Potty · No Latency

0:02
Last time on No Latency side quest, I floor it.
0:06
Oh my gosh, how exciting. Sandru Hello cutie Ultra K8
0:10
Assault Pistol. Just the cute ass.
0:13
It's so cute. That's Kawhi as hell.
0:15
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
0:16
Where that came from, punk. Hey, watch the paint job.
0:19
I just did that. Who hired you?
0:22
This is for Reeves. Where's Dean?
0:25
You're right. You're lucky.
0:26
It's gonna be another 6 seconds before I can beat your ass.
0:29
I have the best time with you to.
0:31
Get them alone. Chill ladies, I have found
0:34
something. I have a feeling I know who, but
0:36
maybe we could confirm it, Mr. Randy Chalet.
0:40
Don't drug people. But let's drug them.
0:43
We're not. We don't give up, so the.
0:46
Yeah, we do. We do whatever you want to the
0:48
office. All right, so we are gonna be
1:04
hot chicks showing up easy to take hot chicks at Randy
1:10
Chalets. So we act like we were.
1:14
Well, so we kind of had two ideas.
1:16
We either a act like we're going to.
1:19
Get rent the place. Rent the place.
1:22
Yeah, I think we. What if we do that?
1:27
And then as a backup, like, does anyone have, like, the police on
1:30
speed dial? You get them to talk about the
1:32
drugs and like, blackmail his ass.
1:36
Probably. I mean, BB's got a lot of
1:38
friends. Maybe she knows someone who'll
1:40
just like, cover for her and be like, yeah, I'm the cops, what
1:43
are you going to do about it? Who would be a good?
1:48
Fake NCPD is my question. Sawtooth Reeves.
1:59
OK, well, I'm. I think.
2:01
I think we should still go the fake detective route.
2:05
Personally. Don't worry guys, I got this and
2:09
I whip out some badges that I guess I already made, but we're
2:14
so we're we're not going to do the thing where we're like,
2:16
we're interested in. Our part Are we going to do all
2:19
of it? I just can.
2:20
Why? Or let's do it all.
2:22
It's a girls night. We can do whatever the fuck we
2:24
want, OK? I know.
2:26
I that's fine. I just wanted to clarify that
2:27
like we're going in first with the apartment thing, then
2:32
switching to the undercover costume.
2:33
We're going to be like, just kidding, We're the cops.
2:36
And then take him in for questioning to the no latency
2:42
bar. Or the Bubble Tea Cafe.
2:45
Or somewhere else, Yeah. Or you can certainly shoot him
2:49
in the head. And you arrive outside of Randy
2:52
Chalet properties do. Do going again a place to live
2:57
cuz we're homeless do to do. OK, so we go in.
3:03
They know somebody knows that there's some 3 smoke show babes
3:08
coming in because some doofuses that work there we're bringing
3:14
up. So that's our that's our thing.
3:16
Macy is the name of the right. We tell Macy like, yo, our new
3:23
friends told us about y'all and we're gonna we're here for yeah,
3:31
yeah. Apartment tour.
3:34
Hello. Hi.
3:36
Hi. Behind the desk is an incredibly
3:40
attractive one. She's got bright red hair and a
3:43
tech skin that has little lines of filament that glow whenever
3:48
she speaks. How?
3:50
Can I help you? Can I look at that vending,
3:54
Michelle? I mean, sure.
4:00
Cool. Thanks.
4:02
I immediately Amanda you guys and go look at this vending
4:05
machine. Hi.
4:09
Hey. You must be Macy.
4:12
Yes, We haven't been introduced. Do you have an appointment?
4:15
Yeah. Well, we kind of were given an
4:20
appointment from the guys back at the shipping containers.
4:23
They're two cute guys. And they told us to come here.
4:26
We're supposed to meet another guy here.
4:29
Oh, I. Stanley, do you know anything
4:31
about this? I know, yeah.
4:36
I talked to. Ah, yes.
4:37
You must be. Yeah, I'm a gardener.
4:44
Hi. What?
4:45
Stanley was your name. Yeah, yeah.
4:47
No, Yes. Yeah.
4:49
Well, my name is. Strong.
4:54
Vera. Yay.
4:57
And these are my, uh, my friends.
5:01
What's up? My name is Wolf Cut and this is
5:05
Tater Tot. Hey.
5:07
Tater Tot is her name. So like, yeah, we wanted to see
5:13
if, like, maybe we could, uh, meet with Randy.
5:17
We were kind of looking for a place.
5:19
Well, I I don't do appointments, it's all Macy.
5:21
But if you want to hang out after, maybe.
5:24
You could, uh. Hook us up, Macy.
5:27
You know, we make good friends with the guys here.
5:30
You can help us get an appointment with Randy.
5:33
You think I'm friends with the really honey guys that work
5:36
here? Or you could be friends with me.
5:38
I lowered the sheets. Whoa.
5:43
I mean, she was. So you want to hook us up with a
5:47
tour? Maybe meet the landlord and
5:51
scope the snitch. I mean, we've got some places
5:55
available all. Right.
5:57
OK. Yeah, that's cool.
5:59
Are you trying to do something because you have to.
6:02
No. If you want to do something.
6:03
All right, well, GABA ghee GABA ghoul.
6:06
I'll roll my fucking dice, GM. Cool.
6:11
It's persuasion for me. Persuasion for you, Anything for
6:16
you, for a cool 10. What did you roll in the dice?
6:19
A2A10. She rolled a nine, so that's
6:26
lucky. Fine.
6:29
I mean, he's got an opening right now.
6:32
He's in the back. Might be taking a phone call,
6:37
but I if you guys just wait a second on the sofa over there,
6:41
I'll let him know you're here and he'll come on get you.
6:43
Cool. Yeah, I go and sit.
6:47
If you need the bathroom or anything, it's over there.
6:51
The vending machine, that one's already found.
6:54
And that's yeah, this place is kind of.
6:58
Small. You're welcome.
7:00
Thank you. I would like to go to the rash
7:05
room and see what's along the path there.
7:09
Any naked I can do? Is there like a candy machine?
7:14
This is it. Likes to have expired.
7:17
This is the year 2000. I think that Jeb always does.
7:20
Any place we go, he'll always go to the bathroom and shut up.
7:24
So shut up, Jeb. We always have bathrooms at
7:28
every map. I like that.
7:31
It's cuz there should be a bathroom.
7:33
In every map. No, you're right, it's.
7:34
The real. I know that no latency pride for
7:37
self or realism, so I just. I appreciate the extra okay.
7:49
I thought I'd feel like down a hall or something.
7:50
It's literally right here. You've found yourself this cute
7:54
little bathroom. Uh huh.
7:55
It's lit with blue lights which look really good in the mirror.
8:00
It's very it's very becoming. The room has a bunch of stalls,
8:06
2 sinks, and a trash can. Role perception.
8:08
If you wanna see anything else. I sure do.
8:12
Almost really bad, but it was fine.
8:16
Aw, perception. Perception.
8:18
You are here 19. 19 Yes, that is enough.
8:24
You check each of the stools to see if anyone's in there and you
8:27
don't find anything except the 2nd stool from the door.
8:32
The wall behind it is black. All the others have a white
8:36
wall. May I investigate further?
8:39
I don't see why not. OK, What do I get?
8:46
Is there? There's not an investigation
8:48
would do. Maybe concealed review.
8:54
I have nothing in grooming. You're a bathroom.
9:01
That's my other. Corner here.
9:07
Oh man, Please be Good 15. 15 It is the back of some kind of
9:13
secure storage. As you lean towards it, you can
9:16
hear a fan running and it sounds like a computer of some
9:20
description, but there's like no way to move.
9:25
It's like a solid thing. Solid right?
9:27
Now you'd have to take your way through it, and it would, might
9:30
take some time. Got it.
9:32
And while you're checking this out outside in the lobby, as
9:36
Coyote and Vivi are chatting in this little waiting area and
9:39
Randy chalets the door to the office opens and Randy steps
9:44
out. Oh, hey.
9:47
Hi. How are you?
9:50
Hey, everyone, I'm Randy. It's great to see you.
9:55
Wow, really chewing on those words there.
9:58
Well, you know, when you've got money, you've got words.
10:01
Yeah, I hear you. Where did you leave the
10:04
apartment? Follow me into my office.
10:08
OK. Steps.
10:10
It's his office. I'm.
10:12
Just OK. Wow, nice.
10:15
Cozy. Please as.
10:19
As we're walking in, I'm gonna slip her the other ship.
10:23
Cook. Thanks.
10:25
Just in case. Hi so how may it be your
10:31
service? So we.
10:36
Are you in there as well, Coyote?
10:38
Me. Yes, I'm in.
10:40
Well, we were in. Me and my my girlies here.
10:45
We were interested in getting a place, maybe one of the nice
10:50
shipping containers. You have something that's nice
10:54
and spacious. Good for three.
10:58
OK and. Wow.
11:04
We heard that you own. Land.
11:07
Oh yeah, a Lord of the land. You will.
11:11
Yeah, cool. I love that.
11:16
I think that that's super chill, bro.
11:19
He's in love, you know. So we're we're looking for a
11:24
place and thought that you'd you'd be the fella to come to
11:29
us. Three young, attractive men just
11:33
looking. Yeah, she's in the bathroom.
11:36
She has. That's more than I needed to
11:40
know. Do you need a more powerful
11:43
toilet? Some of our properties use a
11:46
Porta potty outside for convenience and cost
11:50
effectiveness. That's pretty cool.
11:53
Not if you have IBS. Have you ever taken a long poo
11:58
inside of a porta potty? Cuz it's not good.
12:04
Cool. Upselling.
12:06
Yeah, yeah, maybe one with a built in toilet might be good.
12:13
Someone's getting fancy. Well, she's a career woman, so
12:18
yes, you know, she's got money to move in.
12:22
Oh, you've got money to spend. Throw everything around.
12:33
Sorry about that. I dropped some stuff on the
12:35
ground. It's so embarrassing.
12:37
He does drop some stuff on the ground.
12:39
Raw perception. What is it I want to know all
12:43
right in. The moment when he reaches under
12:45
the desk to grab his pen and a few papers, he drops, you have
12:48
an opportunity to look around this room without him really
12:50
noticing. 12 Phoebe 16 On the left hand side of the room from
12:57
where you're sitting, the north side, you can see a big metal
13:01
chest with with two big doors on it and it says PRIVATE.
13:04
Across the ground on the table, there is a series of papers
13:09
stacked on top of each other and a computer as well.
13:13
Behind you are a bunch of cabinets and they're full of
13:16
awards or the, say, Randy Chalet, landlord of the
13:19
whatever, OK. Wow, these are these are some
13:23
pretty cool awards. And I I walk over to them like
13:28
trying to get him to follow me and then I shoot a look at be be
13:31
like look around. That's what the look is saying
13:34
with my eyes. Great.
13:37
Yes, I am curious in this private cabinet here.
13:42
Is it locked if I if I kind of just like casually like stroll
13:46
over try to? It is.
13:49
It is not locked, but in order to be distracted, Coyote has to
13:53
roll for something. All right, OK.
13:56
We have perception. We have persuasion.
13:58
Persuasion would work. What would be a good one?
14:00
Persuasion is good. Acting would work, since you're
14:03
flirting, you know. Acting.
14:06
I am acting, that's for certain. Oh no, not that.
14:09
I think persuasion. You got it.
14:12
It's probably gonna be the 113. 13 Yeah, he's arrogant enough
14:19
for that DB to work. That feels valid.
14:22
Yeah, it's these awards I. Puts his arm against the one of
14:26
the cabinets like some douche bag in a bar.
14:29
Some of these awards I even made myself.
14:32
You know, my talents keep telling me I'm great and there
14:35
just aren't enough awards for all the hard work landlords do
14:39
all the time. That's very cool.
14:41
Did you sculpt them? You're like on your own.
14:45
Are you an artist? No, no.
14:47
I have money, so I pay someone else to do art.
14:50
Can you imagine doing your own art?
14:51
It would be so. Yeah, that would.
14:53
That would be so stupid. Now, Vivi, while they're having
14:56
this conversation. He is.
14:58
You lean against this cabinet and it.
15:02
It to open I'm. Going to try to open it very
15:04
slowly and gently. And you open it and just inside
15:07
the door there's a cage mesh with a little lock on it, but
15:11
you can see through it. And a few things that you see
15:14
are a bunch of tenancy documents, the lease for the
15:17
Bubble Cafe behind the fence. And there is one piece of paper
15:22
that with very little effort you could grab, and it just says
15:25
UP&S on it. I'm going to try to grab it.
15:28
All right, roll something to grab it.
15:31
Let's see what we can roll. 17 On stealth.
15:36
Yes, you managed to grab it, but in order to not be seen, you
15:39
sneak it into your pocket. You haven't looked at it yet.
15:42
On the other side of the wall in the bathroom, Teensy.
15:44
You can hear TV and Coyote's voice slightly muffled, but you
15:50
know that they're in there. Let's see, what do I have?
15:55
So I'm gonna bust out my tool hand and laser cut the back of
16:00
this. Take it from like a tech.
16:03
How are you gonna stop that from being loud?
16:06
Well, laser is silent, isn't it? You have to make part.
16:13
You have to do that. It's been set up.
16:15
You have IPS. Just do it.
16:17
I'm gonna shout. I'm sorry.
16:19
I was gonna be really loud and then I'm gonna turn my music
16:22
player on like ohh God, I'm so sorry.
16:28
I don't want you to hear this or.
16:30
The door opens and you hear Stanley.
16:32
You you OK? I'm gonna be fine.
16:35
You need help? No, no.
16:38
No, I'm not. God, I'm awful.
16:42
And he leaves the room and closes the door.
16:44
Oh. God, is there a lock on the
16:49
door? On the bathroom door.
16:51
Eight. Yes.
16:52
OK, I lock it. I lock my door.
16:55
Done. I turn the music on, right?
16:58
And I get to work. OK, you start working on that.
17:01
Do you communicate any of this to the other two people?
17:04
I don't know how I would. No need.
17:09
Well, I know, but I assume they're not looking at that.
17:13
They're agents. That's fine.
17:15
Okay. I'll send a quick text that says
17:19
getting down to work. Keep up the distract.
17:22
I sent a text back that took a colon, parentheses, so there's.
17:25
A smile and Vivi, as you're leaning into this cabinet, you
17:29
start to feel it, like, vibrant and it's making kind of a noise.
17:32
It's not too difficult. To hide.
17:35
But obviously it's. Vibrant.
17:38
And so the the chain fence on the inside is kind of throttling
17:41
just. To close it and slowly walk away
17:44
as it's happening. Yeah, so this one I got for for
17:48
renting out to someone who didn't have a home and then I
17:52
evicted them the next month and got this award for.
17:56
My you're like, I just yelled very loudly.
18:00
Tell us more. And.
18:03
I'm just Have you drunk? We might have had like a little
18:06
bit like before we came here. You want some?
18:10
You want a hit? It's we were.
18:12
Drinking in the apartment when you purchase it.
18:15
So were you only drinking an establishment?
18:19
Only if you want to come and hang out with.
18:23
Us. An invitation from all of the
18:26
people who love my work so much. That's great.
18:29
Yeah, well, I think we can. Set up a viewing.
18:32
You guys seem pretty cool. I'm going to roll a perception
18:35
check right now. That is a three, so I'm going to
18:44
say I've got a place coming up real soon.
18:47
It's only two shipping containers, but I'm pretty sure
18:49
you ladies could share the space.
18:52
One of my tenants recently broke some of the rules.
18:55
You're not rule Breakers. Sorry.
18:56
Of course you're not. That's great.
18:58
Awesome. Fantastic.
19:00
Oh, I have a meeting to go to. So we're going to have to wrap
19:05
this up something, something rotten, if you don't mind.
19:09
Actually, it's getting close to us having close down this place.
19:12
So tomorrow morning we can look at that shipping container.
19:15
I'll have the guys clean the, the, the place up so that you
19:20
have a clean place. Great.
19:23
Tintie it's it's about this moment that you you get a whole.
19:27
Into the back of this unit and there you can see a bunch of
19:29
tenancy pavers that are really interesting.
19:31
But you see the lease for the bubble cap there.
19:33
So I grab it and I flush it down.
19:36
I don't want to clog the toilet. I grab it and I rip it into tiny
19:43
pieces and I flush it down the toilet.
19:46
You flush the lease down the toilet.
19:48
This appears into the sewer system of that city.
19:50
Do you do anything about this hole in it?
19:54
Does my tool hand have a soldering iron on it?
20:00
Yes. And they solder it.
20:02
You solder it back together. Turning the music can be louder
20:06
cuz this is a louder process and Randy ushes you out of his
20:10
office. Yeah.
20:11
So tomorrow morning in the. Shipping container area.
20:16
I also have some apartments. I've got a penthouse somewhere
20:18
you might be interested in. It's expensive though.
20:21
I'm sure we could work something out my friend.
20:28
We can Vera has a lot of great qualities.
20:31
Vera. Who doesn't love people whose
20:34
name begins with V? Anyway, leave your references
20:40
with Macy at the front. I really genuinely have to go.
20:44
I've got some stuff to deal with.
20:49
It's great meeting you. Lovely to see you.
20:52
As he turns his back, I'm going to look over at Vivi and I'm
20:56
like in this audio podcast, I'm miming lots of things about
21:01
killing him. For the For the listeners at
21:03
home, Vivi Vivi kind of contemplates for a moment as
21:10
she's not sure what she wants to do.
21:12
She shakes her head. No.
21:14
No, Macy, I'll see you tomorrow morning.
21:16
Yeah, no, whatever she leaves. I'm sorry, guys.
21:20
I'm going to have to shut down the place.
21:21
Is your friend still in the bathroom?
21:23
Oh. Oh.
21:23
One second. I'm almost done, so sorry.
21:29
Completely. OK, I can you air freshener the
21:32
sum of the vending machine? I could buy it, you know.
21:34
So all right, Stanley walks across.
21:38
He buys an air freshener from the machine.
21:40
Accidentally buys 3 here. You go.
21:44
He hands a car air freshener to to Coyote and to be be.
21:49
Like a Christmas tree. I love this.
21:51
Yeah, I have. I got a Cool whip out back.
21:55
It could use this because I live in the van so.
22:01
I got the air freshener. Yeah, I quickly unlock it.
22:04
Like, open it, grab it, shut it. No, that would be cool.
22:14
So again, we we are closing, if you could leave.
22:19
I'll be right, I'll be right and I go to the farthest stall.
22:22
I use the farthest 1 so hopefully it doesn't spread and
22:26
I go to the farthest stall and hang it in the farthest stall
22:30
from the door. Very sneaky.
22:32
It'll take them a while to discover the damage you have
22:34
done to the store, because you've not had enough time to
22:37
really make that undetectable. Shall we say, Yeah.
22:40
Yeah. What do you mean?
22:43
Oh. Guys, I'm sorry.
22:48
Did we get that? Did you find a place?
22:50
I'm so sorry about that. Yeah, I think he's going to show
22:53
us the place tomorrow, so I'm excited.
22:58
It's like a two shipping container.
23:01
For us. Guys, I need to lock up and I'd
23:08
like to go the fuck home. Yeah, Yeah.
23:09
Yeah. That's fair.
23:10
And you step outside and Vivi, you pull this little note that
23:13
you pulled out of that box in your pocket.
23:18
Wow, UP&S. Ultimate packing and shipping.
23:24
We are sorry we missed you. Your items left unattended for
23:28
30 minutes and by request of the property owner were relocated to
23:33
Warehouse 25. Relocation cost is not included
23:38
in your 10. Tenancy fines.
23:39
Relocation fee 400 dam. She really nickel and Dimes for
23:43
everything. Oh wait, this is UPNS.
23:48
They also nick one time for everything.
23:49
OK? We have to go to Warehouse 25.
23:52
That's where the drugs probably are.
23:55
We got it, baby. Hey, guys.
23:58
So I found the the tenant form for the bubble cafe and I ripped
24:04
it up and pushed in the toilet. That's good.
24:06
Hell yeah, I had fiber. Yeah, but also probably.
24:12
They might realize it's us by tomorrow, so or that.
24:15
I mean, I should. Have killed them, I kind of
24:17
being. I made a hole in the back and.
24:20
That's OK We can kill him tomorrow, cuz we're meeting him
24:25
again in the morning. What if they're meeting?
24:27
Won't that be fun? What if?
24:29
What if they're having this meeting at Warehouse 25?
24:32
We should probably speed there then and get there before them.
24:38
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Driving ooh ooh that's Oh no. Is that exactly.
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Suck on that. I did too.
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For a 31, that's high. That's very high.
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That's high. Oh, I rolled a 32.
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Go fuck yourself. Fucking way well, Brandy's.
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Brandy's is an experienced landlord and you guys head
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You don't really see anyone else.
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There are a few cars parked on the street, but there's no real
26:40
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anything. But by parking around the side
26:48
of the building, you also see that there's a back entrance to
26:51
this building. Perhaps we tried the back
26:54
entrance. We could always set a fire.
26:57
Ooh, I like setting stuff on fire.
27:00
I I am a fan of fire. The only thing is if the drugs
27:05
are in here, that's all of the drugs for the bubble tea place.
27:10
It's true, we do need the drugs. In case the.
27:14
Version in here. I don't even know what's in here
27:16
honestly. VB role.
27:20
Yes, let's. Get.
27:23
Sneaky darn dash frog. You roll.
27:28
You roll so badly that you knock on the porta potty behind the
27:34
door of the warehouse and inside a voice return.
27:46
Yes. Do you an air freshener?
27:51
I have. It's for a car, just.
27:55
Leave me alone. I don't know what it's like we
27:58
are from, but I prefer. The person here could jump this
28:00
guy and if he works here, we could take his clothes and
28:03
pretend to. That's true.
28:05
We could actually kill him off the toilet like we did with the
28:09
other guys, but we didn't kill him off the toilet.
28:11
Do you want to do that? Hi, Do you work here?
28:14
Sorry, we're just looking for somebody who works here.
28:17
No, I worked for a long. I'm quite busy.
28:21
I don't really want to have a conversation while.
28:25
Having excrement. So if you don't mind, leave me
28:28
alone. I like that you call an
28:31
excrement. That's pretty funny.
28:32
Again, this wasn't an invitation.
28:34
Can you talking to me? I'm having.
28:40
It's not. Funny.
28:44
Ah yes, the side quest of poop jokes.
28:47
We love this. Hey man.
28:52
You guys put people in portapoties.
28:58
Leaned. I was going to leave it out, but
28:55
I was like, cool, I'll lean in. Double down.
29:00
Which? Ironically, is what he's doing.
29:07
Can I? Can I like keep?
29:09
Walking and looking for doors while they're torturing the man.
29:13
So there's a door that's locked next to the porta potty, and
29:16
also the porta potty itself is free, standing behind the.
29:21
That's what that is. OK.
29:22
Oh, he might have a key. Then again, you're good at lock
29:25
picking. Oh, that's true.
29:28
All right, TT. Hey, I'll.
29:31
Do your magic La La La La la heck, in the lock is that you're
29:38
picking locks on. Yeah, it is a 1515.
29:44
Yes, that's enough to unlock the door.
29:48
Quietly, I like open the door slowly.
29:51
I don't want to make and I want to squeeze.
29:53
Do I have WD40 with all my tools?
29:55
I have like all the kind of tool kits I have in my gear.
29:59
You do. And I'm going to tell you what
30:01
I'll give you plus one to a stealth roll on that, OK, I'll
30:05
I'll smart. I like.
30:06
Lubricate the hedges of the door so it doesn't tweak.
30:10
That's that's really smart. I like that.
30:13
And I slowly open the door. I peek in first to make sure
30:17
there's not just, like, people right inside the door.
30:20
Roll Stealth. Domestic explodes.
30:23
Yay. No way. 12 + 9 so 31 No, I can't
30:28
mask 2121, that's still very high.
30:31
Yes, you managed to open the door silently and you see into
30:36
this warehouse. It's dirty, but all the boxes
30:40
are fairly well organized, and there's a guard wearing exactly
30:44
the same outfit as you saw outside Dean's Place standing
30:48
next to a box. Hey, I like I like shut it
30:52
quietly. Hey guys, you think you can get
30:56
the guy in the porta potty to yell so loudly his friend comes
30:59
out to check on him? I mean, we can also just like
31:02
make a lot of noise out here. Yes, OK, sure.
31:04
Whatever, I I could only see one guy in there.
31:08
But there's there's probably more.
31:09
There's probably more. I I go to the whip and I turn up
31:12
the radio super fucking loud and I jump on top and I start.
31:17
Dancing and we, we and I should. Hide We hide, We hide behind the
31:22
porta potty. Yes.
31:24
Distraction. Let's go.
31:26
All right, roll something for how big this distraction is.
31:29
Roll something acting. Acting is good.
31:33
Persuasion is always going to be better than acting for me.
31:36
Roll for dance. Oh wait, I should roll for
31:40
dance. You should.
31:42
Roll for dance I did almost when I was deciding read a book, I'd
31:45
say did almost put it in dance and I decided for art instead.
31:49
But that ain't bad, chief. But that is an implosion that is
31:54
actually bad for. That bad dancing is in fact more
31:58
distracting than goodness. Yes, I suppose it is.
32:03
That's fine the the distraction is but a little too loud and
32:11
instead of just one guard coming to investigate, 2 guards.
32:18
What? The fuck are you doing?
32:23
What the? Fuck.
32:24
Is that on the side of your vehicle?
32:26
That is. It's a buff wizard riding a wolf
32:30
howling up the moon. No, this is so.
32:32
You don't have taste. This looks like.
32:34
Three women that were badly drawn.
32:36
Why I'm so bad? Because that's so.
32:40
Bad that. Aren't bad, isn't it?
32:41
Your voice really bad. It's incredibly shit odd.
32:44
I know you're trying to make me feel bad, but the joke's on you
32:48
because I'm so secure in myself and there's nothing to do about
32:54
that. Nerds, I'm gonna push the porta
32:58
potty. We're.
33:01
Gonna pause them. It's good.
33:11
This location should invest in indoor plumbing.
33:13
I don't know. Yeah, no more Porta Potties
33:16
roll. Yeah, roll rawling, both of you.
33:20
Well. VICE Do you have an inspiration?
33:26
I think I'm going to use it after two crip fails.
33:31
OK, that's better. 12, Good. And what did you get, Teensy?
33:35
I just I just found it. Oh, I'm going to say before you
33:39
tell me what you rolled. Yes.
33:41
You don't have to use brawling on this one.
33:43
You're a tech. You could do that technology to
33:47
learn it clearly. I wrote a 17 so I feel good.
33:52
Instead of creating some kind of cool contraption, you and VV
33:56
push this porta potty onto these two dudes.
34:00
It sounds fun. I would much rather help vv push
34:02
this thing over than create a. Something.
34:05
I rolled straight this time. Like the first form of
34:09
technology, right? Think about it.
34:11
I rolled an 8 for one of them and a three for the other.
34:15
One of them hears the noise and steps out of the well.
34:19
The other one gets crushed by the porta potty and the luckily
34:24
for you guys, large God, large man that is inside said porta
34:30
potty. The porta potty is made of solid
34:32
material and it starts to crush this man on the ground.
34:36
You also hear a very unfortunate, disgusting sloshing
34:40
noise as the man inside is covered.
34:52
Why are you talking so much? And you've crushed this guy.
35:05
The other guy looks at UVV and you, Teensy.
35:08
I was. Like, what the fuck no.
35:10
That's that's really shitty guys.
35:12
That's not OK And he pulls The first person to get initiative
35:21
is the guy inside the porta potty.
35:26
He just rolled a fucking tent and another 10 and A7 giving
35:32
plus 37 to him, bursting out of sideways toward the port
35:37
o'clock. He bursts out of it like a
35:40
Marvel villain bursts out of a pile of rubble, and he is
35:45
covered in hope. You fucks, What the fuck is
35:49
wrong with you? You don't know how many times
35:52
I've been pushed over at a port body.
35:54
Too many? Yes.
35:57
Maybe you didn't use? And this wasn't my first time.
36:01
And you know what? I'm fucking sick of it.
36:04
Oh geez. And he pulls out with heavy
36:06
pistol. He shoots at teensy odds or
36:09
evens. Evens.
36:10
Yep, shoots vv Oh no, 20 hitting VV for 12 damage VV.
36:15
Question is your reflex above. Eight it is not above 8.
36:19
I do not have the matrix. Yeah, well, you get hit for 12
36:23
damage. OK, I have to do some math.
36:27
Ow odds he takes his second shot at Teensy.
36:32
And you? Well, I hurt your hands 19
36:36
hitting you for 15 damage, but that's all he can do.
36:42
He's now standing in the Porta potty with the door facing
36:46
upwards. The guy who was missed by the
36:50
Porta potty is next, and he takes out his gun and shoots it
36:55
at Coyote Missing as the bullet flies past you, just missing the
37:02
van. That's I do it dab.
37:07
Very frustrating when he shoots you again, hitting you for just
37:11
six damage. Only six.
37:13
Yeah, well, I got a Crip fail. I'm gonna, I'm gonna flip on the
37:17
bird and pull out of my back and I'm gonna swing it around over
37:20
my head, like still dancing to the music.
37:23
And I'm like, you're ready? Are you ready for this?
37:29
Really. Should be.
37:30
Are you ready for the coyote? It's your turd.
37:31
I'm. Going to jump over and I'm going
37:34
to like. Smack him with the bath.
37:40
Let's go for 16 first hit. Yeah, that's enough.
37:45
Yeah, Smackdown, right. Yes, it.
37:49
Is for 15 damage, You smack him for 15 damage, he actually takes
37:54
a move. Ow, fuck.
37:55
What is in your baseball bat? Love for my friends.
37:59
Smack him again. Yeah, you do. 23I rolled a foot
38:06
So it doesn't matter what he's got, that's not going to catch
38:09
your 23 and you smack him the other way and he falls over
38:12
under his ow oh. Bad Roll a damage.
38:16
A damage. You ripped.
38:18
My shirt. And I'm bleeding.
38:21
Good. Wow.
38:23
That's what happens when you mess with my friends.
38:26
Cool. All right, I'll sever on Vivi
38:31
cock in my shotgun and I'll point it at him and I'll say.
38:37
You're already covered in poo and it's not the first time, so
38:41
I I don't want to kill you to make this stop happening.
38:44
So go get another job. Otherwise I'm shooting.
38:47
You. What?
38:48
It just. Stops.
38:54
You can't the places roll a face down.
38:57
I was going to say in the world today.
38:59
Loves a face down. It's it's her favorite.
39:01
Who doesn't love a face down? OK. 19 Oh, you did really well.
39:06
All right. I also roll the nine that he's
39:09
not famous and does not have as high a reputation as you.
39:13
Know what Gonna be real? I'm covered in shit.
39:16
Yeah, so go. Home.
39:19
If it's. I know I shot some people, but
39:21
if it's all right with you, I'm gonna go I.
39:23
Think that's for the best? You have a very good point.
39:26
Maybe I should just? Contemplate.
39:29
Stop. Hoping your life and why you're
39:32
working here. And maybe you should stop and
39:34
also, but tell us where the drugs are before you go.
39:36
Where are the drugs? Oh, they're.
39:38
Inside, inside where, all right. Oh, shit.
39:41
Inside the warehouse, it serves the drug dealer.
39:43
He's, He's. Walks away.
39:47
You gotta get in there. And Teensy, that's your turn.
39:52
You managed to remove a person from the fight by convincing him
39:56
that he's who covered in shit. Kill him after he already got
40:00
covered in. Porta.
40:02
Potty poo. Yeah, so it felt wrong.
40:05
Also murder him. Well, now there's just a poo cup
40:08
of man walking down the streets of Knight City.
40:10
So it's a Thursday. And so the other guy is like
40:15
knocked out or like is knocked down.
40:19
Yeah, he's been knocked down and he's underneath the porta potty.
40:23
He probably could make it out from under there now, but
40:25
there's nothing different. All right, all right.
40:28
I'll just smack him. I'll smack him in the head like
40:31
that twice. Yeah.
40:34
Knock him out. I don't know if I.
40:35
Yeah. He doesn't get to evade because
40:38
he's stuck under a portable. So Oh yeah, let's go.
40:41
Huh. Your first hit hits him very
40:45
cleanly across the face and does 14 damage.
40:48
He cannot evade, he takes that hit.
40:51
Your second hit doesn't do as much damage, and even though
40:54
it's only a 13, again, he is pinned.
40:57
Like a Porta coffee. So you smack him the other way,
41:00
getting him just below half health, and he tries to move and
41:05
you hear his legs. Fuck.
41:10
Oh no, that stings. What is getting in my wound?
41:13
Don't don't even know. Nobody say it, just we all know
41:16
what it is. Better make sure that doesn't
41:18
get infected. Let's just not.
41:20
Yes. Thank you, Doctor.
41:21
Oh, you are actually a doctor? Just saying, those infections
41:25
are the real things that kill. Not really.
41:26
You know, any of the injuries or anything like that.
41:29
It's the infection. Sorry.
41:31
Yeah. How should you go inside now?
41:32
She's a doctor. I just rolled A1 and this guy
41:37
goes white. What?
41:40
He just starts cunning. Good, I I go, she's a doctor and
41:44
I'm a doctor of justice and I smoke with my face all there.
41:50
She's just kidding. On your turn, which it is not,
41:55
it is that guy's turn, but he is now panicked.
41:58
He tries to get out of the underneath of the porta potty.
42:02
He rolls A5 and manages to crawl out, but he's still now he gets
42:07
snacked. And it is the the guy you've hit
42:12
twice with the baseball bat who wasn't pinned by the Porta
42:15
Potty. Oh, right.
42:17
He pulls out, there was another guy.
42:20
There was another guy. He.
42:21
Pulls out his heavy pistol and he shoots you for six damage,
42:26
again not doing enough to break your armor.
42:29
And he kind of. He looks at his get.
42:30
Well, fuck, that's not. I don't have a metallic weapon,
42:33
so I'm just going to shoot you again. 11 damage.
42:36
That's better. See.
42:37
Bullet wound. Fuck you.
42:38
All right, well, that wasn't fun.
42:41
Me or probably most people in this situation right now, we
42:46
find ourselves, but you know, mess with the pack, we get the
42:50
back. Smack, smack, smack.
42:55
I change all our jackets to say bat yes, the backpack.
43:00
And I think to myself, I gotta get it back 21. 21 How much
43:07
damage 12. 12 I rolled 3 fours. How crazy is that?
43:12
That's pretty cool, yeah. You hit him pretty hard.
43:15
You hear a crack or two in his armor.
43:18
He might have a stress fracture, but he's still going.
43:21
He's above half health. But you do have another Melody
43:23
attack. Don't you?
43:24
I do. Oh.
43:25
Shit. All right.
43:27
One more for a 21. Yeah, I didn't roll enough on
43:31
invasion. You hit him again.
43:33
How much damage? Oh, you're going to love this,
43:35
you guys. Double sixes?
43:39
Oh. Yes, 15.
43:43
Eight. You break one of his legs with
43:46
your second hip and his knee bends the wrong way goes before.
43:52
Oh, this is not worth it, and neither are you.
43:58
And I flip in the bird and I walk inside and I follow VB.
44:02
OK, OK, guys. I don't have one.
44:06
You should, you should get out of here.
44:07
You should get those injuries seen.
44:09
I'm just going to leave. Us here, yeah.
44:12
Yeah, I would. Do you have an agent?
44:15
Can I like, get past your buttons so that someone comes
44:18
for you? Is that a thing?
44:20
I don't have health insurance. What about you?
44:23
I'm on probation. Gosh, that sucks.
44:25
Okay. Bye.
44:29
And you're now in this quiet warehouse.
44:31
You hear the creaking of the walls, and there are a bunch of
44:36
boxes. A few in the corner are
44:37
addressed to Dean, and there's a little stairway up to an
44:41
observation walkway. At the very top of that
44:44
observation walkway, there is a door.
44:47
And teensy, as you get closer to this door, you notice two
44:49
things. One, that it's locked, and two,
44:52
that there is muffled screaming coming from the inside.
44:54
I'm coming. We're.
44:57
Calling for you, teen, Where are the drugs if?
45:01
We saw them put them down there. I go and get the drugs.
45:06
The drugs are in massive crates. There's no way you're moving
45:08
this shit, all right? I.
45:11
Go to the 15 to pick the lurk. You unpick the lock, and as you
45:15
step into the room you see a man tied to a chair, and in front of
45:20
him Brandy. Shall I?
45:23
Hi guys, the viewing's tomorrow and it's not here.
45:29
And behind you, Dean is missing. He is bleeding from the wound.
45:34
We're just having a business meeting, you understand, But now
45:39
that I think about it. It's a business meeting that you
45:43
shouldn't see. And he puts his arms out and two
45:47
rippers come out of them. So maybe I should take you out.
45:54
That being said, it's not my turn.
45:56
We. Wanted to kill you this whole
46:00
time. Hey Guy Otte, we get to kill
46:01
him. Fuck yes.
46:03
Fuck yes. Plan a.
46:06
Plan A. No need for the I rape up.
46:09
The man made police badges. I shoot my shotgun that is a 15.
46:20
Wow. So 10 + 5 for 15. 15 Yes, that
46:24
is a lot of damage. The shotgun blast.
46:27
Leaves singers across the front of his body, ruining his jacket.
46:31
Ow shit. That sucks.
46:35
And Dean, behind him, moans in paint.
46:42
All right, you are an asshole, OK?
46:44
And I've been wanting to do this.
46:46
Every stupid ass letter we've had to read from you about you
46:50
nickel and diming every single one of your tenants and all the
46:53
horrible things that you're doing to the Bubble Tea Cafe.
46:56
This is for them. And I'm going to just take my
47:00
bat and just slam them in the face.
47:02
And that's why she's the leader. Are you using any luck with?
47:05
This I used all of mine sadly. You lose all of your milk.
47:09
That's fine. Right, that's a 3 +.
47:13
I rolled 16. Well, I rolled 17.
47:17
I see that 14 damage, 14 damage hits.
47:23
You hit him across the chest with your baseball bat.
47:26
It makes him take a sidestep. I'm.
47:29
In a little bit of pain. Ooh, and I try to swing again.
47:32
Wait. No, not twice.
47:36
Ooh. I rolled an 8 and he dodges your
47:38
second swing. Uh huh.
47:40
That's right, Dick. Excuse you, I'm a lady.
47:44
You tried. You tried to hit me with a
47:46
baseball. It's.
47:49
Kind of a Dick move, no? You can tell her Nice lady with
47:53
the baseball bat. Will on my turn.
47:57
Oh God, I'm ready for the pain. And he launches at you with his
48:02
rippers. They ain't Wolvers. 15 Now it is
48:07
MLA attacks, so remember you take half of the damage, not
48:10
what your armor deducts. Yes, OK.
48:14
And I can't evade this, right? You can.
48:17
You can. If you can beat A-15 on evasion,
48:20
you can evade these rippers. So 18.
48:22
That's enough. The Ripper sticks into the
48:24
ground and you take the coolest sidestep ever.
48:27
Teensy. You're impressed.
48:29
Hell yeah. Wow, I'm impressed.
48:32
Well, shit, that's a good thing. I can do that twice.
48:36
Beat a 20 Dick? Yeah, I'm probably not beating
48:39
that. Nope, I didn't.
48:42
And the Ripper sticks into your arm, causing 7 damage but not
48:45
breaking through your cool new jacket.
48:49
That's because the jacket is full of friendship.
48:53
You tried not good enough. Dean behind this.
48:57
Horrible landlord. You see him kind of scream a bit
49:02
louder than he normally did, and a huge spurt of blood comes out.
49:05
Sorry, Dean. Is missing on.
49:07
I'll help you soon. Wow, Bebe, you look so cool
49:11
right now. It's because of these jackets.
49:13
I'm telling you. Where are the.
49:16
Oh wait, we gotta look. Click the day mode again.
49:20
You said it's a light mode. The Led's come and gone and I
49:24
flip my shades down. Let's gawk these fucking nerds,
49:29
and I run over and I smack with my baseball bat next to VB for
49:32
just the double threat. With our double.
49:35
Just with our baseball bats. Cool.
49:42
All right, first attack 20. One No, I'm not being that.
49:49
Nope, I did not be that. By evasion.
49:52
I rolled A7 and got 18. Just pretty good evasion.
49:56
For 11, that's not bad, all right, 12 damage. 12 damage, all
50:02
right You hit him really hard with your baseball bat and you
50:05
see him take visible damage. His arm is now bruised and he is
50:10
in visible pain. Ow, you know, I've got a lot of
50:14
health, but I'm getting dangerously close to rolling on
50:16
the table. I I sure hope you do.
50:21
And I smack him again. Roll for it 19.
50:28
Your second hit hits the ground. Fuck you, you're rude and I
50:33
don't like you very much. OK.
50:35
No, fuck you and I shouldn't win my car coming down for 19. 19
50:41
hits? Yes.
50:43
He cannot evade bullets. How much damage is that do you
50:47
want? Yeah, that's love that set.
50:51
Like. That.
50:52
So many Chaos Rocks. So many Chaos rocks.
50:54
I keep rolling so low on these it is 12. 12 Alright, he's below
51:01
half health now. He takes a knee to the ground as
51:05
he gets hit. And Vivi, you're a medical
51:08
professional. You've been around a lot of
51:10
injuries. You hear his lung color.
51:13
Oh, like a like a balloon deflating too hard and you can
51:18
hear it trying. Every time he tries to breathe
51:22
and he's man, that is not good, my dude.
51:35
You're going to have a hard time breathing for the rest of this
51:37
fight in the rest of your life. You say as it is.
51:41
Your turn. Ha ha.
51:45
I I feel bad. I could probably help you, but
51:48
you're just a really shitty landlord, so I'm gonna beat or
51:55
beat his ass. Don't know. 17 He takes 13
52:00
damage. He's really not doing well at
52:03
this point. He is very close to death.
52:04
Let's see if I finish him off. 18 finishing.
52:09
That's not enough. That's.
52:10
That's close, yeah. That's close.
52:13
I rolled 16, which is pretty good, but not good enough, and
52:16
you hit him for 13 damage, You hear this crack.
52:19
His chin spins to the left and his neck snaps and he falls to
52:23
the ground dead. This is a rough one and combat
52:27
is over. Vivi is going to immediately try
52:35
to help Dean, so are. You.
52:38
Are you here to hurt me as well? No, no, no.
52:41
We are friend, not foe. And I am here to help.
52:44
I'm a doctor. I don't.
52:46
Well, if you're a doctor, I don't know if you noticed, but
52:49
my arm's missing. I've noticed.
52:51
What did they do to you? I think they took his arm.
52:54
Looks at his arm, he looks at you and he says.
52:57
They cut off my arm. Damn, that's just rough.
53:00
OK, let me help you. In my fucking apartment.
53:03
Just so they could steal your drugs.
53:05
I wouldn't tell them where the drugs were.
53:07
The dumb part is they were in the packages they took from me.
53:11
My storage room was empty. How they didn't recognize that
53:14
one of the storage containers was shorter than the other is
53:17
beyond me. Well, I'm gonna patch you right
53:20
up. At least for now.
53:21
You will get well. I'll take you to one of my
53:25
specialists who can probably give you a cyber arm if you need
53:29
it, but for now we'll just make sure that you're not going to
53:32
bleed out and die, so I'll help. You're all 18 and you managed to
53:36
close this wound with some of your Med kits stuff along with
53:41
some gauze and some other materials.
53:42
It costs you about 45 eddies and materials, but you do save his
53:47
life. Thanks for that.
53:50
You know, I probably could. I'd like a new arm.
53:54
I could buy one. It's funny.
53:56
I'm really rich. I, I would imagine with all of
54:02
the the drugs. Yeah.
54:04
So look, we could use your help with returning your deliveries
54:10
to the bubble tea place. Well, with all the people who
54:13
are dead here, it doesn't look like I'll have to be paying them
54:16
any money. Good.
54:17
So like, my boxes are downstairs.
54:20
I saw them when they dragged me in here.
54:23
So if you like like. We could either like order a
54:26
car. We've got a van I got.
54:30
You could have gone. I got a totally bodacious web
54:32
outside, so I'm sorry if you're running.
54:34
A bit slow. I've lost a lot.
54:35
Yeah, you should probably. Oh, here you go.
54:40
And I give him the synth poke. Bubble tea.
54:45
That's great. I love bubble tea.
54:47
He. Takes a sip before asking what's
54:50
cynics. It's it's just a little program
54:52
up. It's an upper, you know.
54:54
Come on. Oh, great.
54:55
You know, it's funny. If there were drugs in this, I'd
54:58
be fine because it just rolled a nine.
55:01
That's cool. I like that you can feel what
55:04
you roll. In your watches, is that from
55:07
the net? Is it like?
55:11
No, it's more to just inform the audience what's going on.
55:13
Oh, cool, great. Yeah.
55:16
I have. I have some kibble, so I'll also
55:19
like put that in his. Hand that's a little there.
55:23
Oh, that's. Really great.
55:24
Thanks for putting in the hand. I still have another one I
55:26
don't. Yeah.
55:28
No. You, you, you.
55:29
You. Know Matt, there's something in
55:31
this, isn't there? Because I just made a really
55:33
stupid observation of myself. Uh, what would that be that
55:36
observation be? That she didn't put the food in
55:39
the hand I don't have. Is there drugs in this?
55:43
Uh, yeah, that's. I just said it was an upper.
55:45
Come on, man, you know what they put in the bubble?
55:48
Tea. It's one of yours.
55:51
This is my since coke, yeah. We looked for you at your place
55:54
first. Oh no.
55:57
Did they find my little room? We did, but they didn't.
56:00
Oh good. I was worried because you know,
56:03
be really bad if you just left everything unlocked and left it
56:06
open because then people would know, yeah, we totally didn't do
56:09
that, so and you worry about it. I thought about locking it and I
56:14
was like, yeah, it's fine. So let me and I'll open the
56:18
kibble for him, because he only has.
56:20
Oh, that's great. You're so nice you guys.
56:22
Well, if you want to load the stuff into the van, I won't help
56:26
now because. Again, I'm missing an arm blood
56:30
loss. You definitely need to be to get
56:33
you to see a doctor. Make sure you're you're all good
56:37
and does this. Help.
56:39
And he pulls out a little card from his wallet.
56:41
Is he? It's difficult to do with only
56:43
one arm, but he pulls it after you've sort of untined him, He
56:45
pulls it out and he just hands you a Platinum trauma team card.
56:48
Does this help drug dealer and trauma team Platinum.
56:52
You are a legend. I sell drugs.
56:56
Yeah. We are in the wrong profession,
57:00
guys. That's what I'm saying.
57:04
I'm just Viv, if you hung out with us more, maybe he could be
57:07
doing stuff like this. That's what I'm saying.
57:09
The shit. All right, we'll help you out.
57:12
OK, well, do you want to like pack up all the stuff to the van
57:18
and? Then, like, I know that, like, I
57:20
probably should see a doctor first, but like, you rolled an
57:22
18. Do you guys want to get some
57:24
bubble tea? I would love nothing more than
57:28
to get some bubble tea. I just want to see the look on
57:31
their faces when we tell them that we save them.
57:34
Finally, we can actually have our girls night Girls night.
57:57
Hi, I'm Diane Hutton and you can find me on all socials at Diane
58:00
Hutton with a DAYE and you can catch me playing another
58:04
cyberpunk actual play at Infinite Side of Dice on
58:07
YouTube. Which is already out, so check
58:10
it out now. Hey, what's up?
58:12
No latency, listeners. My name's Anias Morgan.
58:15
You can follow me at Aniasr Morgan everywhere.
58:18
That's a NAISRMORGANI love no latency.
58:24
Thank you for having me back. So excited about it.
58:27
I'm also on infinite sided dice doing Cyberpunk Edge of
58:30
Extinction, which is another Cyberpunk read.
58:32
Actual Play Season 2 is already out, so jump on in at Infinite
58:38
Sided Dice on YouTube. I'm also on the Renegade channel
58:41
quite a bit, so if you just want to keep your eye out all through
58:44
October I'll be in a bunch of different videos and yeah, say
58:49
hi. Hello everybody.
58:52
I am Tracy, also known as Miss Magic Tech, and you can find me
58:56
here at No Latency every week as yours truly Vivi.
59:01
But of course you can also find me at Twitch TV slash Magic RPG,
59:06
where I stream lots of tabletop games with my friends multiple
59:10
nights a week. Or you can find me doing other
59:12
content and things on places like TikTok and Instagram at
59:16
Miss Magic Tech. And thank you, listener for
59:19
joining us on our first ever Side Quest sequel.
59:23
We'll return to our regular schedule program next week, but
59:25
until then, we'll see you in 9th City.
59:51
Thank you for joining us on our adventure once again here at No
59:55
Latency. Don't forget to follow us on
59:58
Twitter at No Latency Pod. Check out our website at
1:00:01
nolatencypodcast.com. And if you'd like to support us
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further, we have a Patreon. Get exclusive content, spinoffs,
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more with weekly content to say thank you to our supporters and
1:00:16
even spice up your own cyberpunk red games at home, no matter
1:00:20
what level your support. Thank you again so much for
1:00:24
listening. We literally couldn't do this
1:00:26
without you. And of course, we'll see you
1:00:29
next time in Night City. Thanks for listening, Jim.