Latest / Strange Stuff Podcast / Episode 246: A Future Without Humans
Transcript
- Mark: Morning, I'm Mark. Andy: Hello everyone, I'm Andy. Works in a bad way. Mark: ⁓ dear, now I just looked out the window, it's really blowing a storm here. Andy: It's really nice here. Mark: Well, it's almost, ⁓ when I do the roof of the garage, when I'm by myself, it's like a comedy of errors when I'm by myself anyway, and when it's blowing a storm, it's almost impossible. So that's why I'm talking to you instead of wrestling roofing panels. Andy: Yeah, we're recording a day early and an hour late or two hours late because Mark decided to, according to his telling bone, the weather tomorrow is ideal for roofing so he doesn't want to waste any of it talking to me. Mark: It is far from ideal, but it's better than it is today, which is impossible. Anyway, what difference do you... they're all the same, the days are all the same. If we did it Sunday, Monday... Andy: which is... No, they're not. They're not because it's relevant as to what's going on in the world today. It's a day later tomorrow. I promise you something fucking world shattering is going to happen today. And we fucked. We've missed it. Yes. And we've missed it because of your poxy garage roof. Mark: Yeah, but it's all the same shit. We talk about the same Trump bollocks every week. do you think? ⁓ I think what would be not earth-shattering, I'll tell you what would be really good is if that imbecile Kash Patel went as well and Hegsith went. That would be actually, you know, I really think well done finally some sense. Well, I say sense, depends who they're replaced by. He is the head of the FBI. Andy: Who's Kash Patel? Mark: and you know yesterday what was it what was he talking about yesterday some reporter asked him so if you weren't drunk why why were you locked out of your security system and he gets onto the podium I was not locked out of my security system it's all fake news you reporters don't do any research and the journalist turned around and said hang on a second you've made a court application stating that you were locked out of your system exactly exactly and so when he's faced with the reality of it actually being in writing that he has provided to a court then that idiot Todd Blanch stands up and says he does a trump ⁓ you're so rude show some respect Andy: It's all fake news. It's phony stuff. It didn't happen. Ugh, and that suit, where did you buy that even? They're just a bunch of fucking retarded kids, aren't they? Mark: They really are. And what's, you know, so that's just a minor amusing aside. But they're in negotiations with Iran. So what do they do? In supposed ceasefire, they go and bloody bomb them again. Andy: Yeah, because there's no negotiation. It's a lie. Mark: Of course it is. And you got... And who won? Someone finally said the obvious truth that it's Israel that's dictating what Trump does. I mean, everybody knows it. Yeah, but anyway. Sorry, I had a go earlier that we always talk about rant about Trump and that's exactly the hole I fell into 30 seconds later. Andy: It's a lie, no one is talking to anyone. Well, that's been said from the start. Well, you can have a rant about Stammer instead. He's actually gone up in my estimation today because he's under fire from Tony Blair. Mark: Stomach. That's right, yes he is, he's under fire from Tony Blair. Yeah. Andy: That can only be a good sign. Because if a war criminal is unhappy with you, you're doing something right. Mark: Yeah. I can't remember what he was unhappy about. General party direction. Andy: ⁓ Lacking ⁓ a coherent plan says the man who fucking ran headlong into a 20 year war with Afghanistan. Mark: Alright. Sent us to war. Yeah. Yeah. Andy: WENKER Mark: I read quite a nice little story the other day about some poor girl in Afghanistan, because they can't even go to school anymore, who, ⁓ who literally got on a bus and escaped. Andy: and got shot in the head. Mark: No, no, no, she escaped. She got out and she was saying, you the reality of women in Afghanistan is they simply don't have a future. I there is no future for women in Afghanistan. They can't get educated. They can't do anything. Andy: No, they're only allowed to breed. Mark: Literally and cook and clean maybe but that sounds a bit like Hesketh in fact one really disturbing thing Some very short clip, you know that what they call them shorts or something a girl was saying So she's doing a little commentary and she's saying yeah in Afghanistan if you're a girl and you're raped by your father and you get pregnant Andy: Yeah. Mark: you have to go to term, you have to give birth to the baby, because if you don't you get put in prison for life. And then she sort of looked quizzically at the camera and said, ⁓ no, sorry, that's Alabama, Mississippi and Texas. That's literally the law, because in America now some of the states enforce this no abortion law in a concrete way. So even if you're raped by your own father you have to give birth to the baby. Andy: Yeah. Yeah, that was probably a deliberate mistake. Mark: No, no, mean, exactly. She was making exactly the point that, hang on a second, it's not Afghanistan. Exactly. It's actually happening in 2026 in America. Andy: Hang no it's not Afghanistan, it's AMERICA! Yeah, because the zealots out there just... Mark: What's a zealot? You mean a zealot? Andy: It's a zealot. It's not. Mark: It's a zealot. If I do Google Translate it would be a zealot. Andy: zealot. Yeah, but have you heard the robot voice on Google Translate? And then they beat it with their steely knives. Mark: You That's the line out of a song, isn't it? Andy: No, that's a Cadbury Smash advert with the robots. ⁓ Mark: ⁓ that's right. Cabbage Smash. I wonder if they still make it. Andy: I would imagine so. It's very popular over here, potatoes mousse in a sachet. Mark: Yeah, but they don't have Cabra's Smash. Cabra's Smash. I can't remember the tune, but you're right. They were little robots, weren't they? God, dear, how sad we are. Anyway, so we've gone from incest in Afghanistan to Cabra's Smash in the space of 30 seconds. No wonder no one can make any sense of this podcast. It just goes anywhere and everywhere. Andy: You I can't make any sense of it. Let's see what happened in the past on this wonderful day. Mark: Now are we doing it? I always ask, are we doing it on this day or tomorrow? Today. Right. Andy: Today, today, it's always going to have to be today. I can't do it on a different day because then the maths comes into it. Mark: Don't work. Right. It gets too complicated. Andy: So today in 1703, St. Petersburg was founded in Russia. It was established by Peter the Great, of course. And for over 200 years, it served as Russia's capital. Although the Bolsheviks made Moscow the capital in 1918, following the Russian Revolution. Mark: capital that's right yeah I've got a general knowledge quiz question for you. Okay, so what is the capital of West Germany? Andy: Berlin? Mark: It is Berlin, is it? Has it always been Berlin or is it just since the reunification it's become Berlin? I thought it was Köln or one of the other cities. Everybody thought it was Berlin but in fact it wasn't. Andy: was. No, I think it's always been Berlin, now that you've planted that seed, who knows? Mark: Yeah, there's this element of doubt. It's like, what's the capital of Australia? Everybody says Sydney. Well, it's not. It's Canberra, isn't it? Andy: It's like, where is the Gulf of Mexico? Aha! There is no such thing. Canberra. Mark: No, but what is the capital of Australia? Correct me if I'm wrong, but it's Canberra. It is, yeah, not Sydney. Yeah. Anyway, sorry, you were saying St. Petersburg was the capital of Russia. But what do mean, established? St. Petersburg must have been a town or a city for donkey's years, long before 1757. Andy: Ugh. Yeah, but you it is. I'm sure it was already there, but it's established as the capital. I guess they moved parliament or whatever their military junta to St. Petersburg or. Mark: I was supposed to go on a business trip to St Petersburg. Andy: Really? What sort of business? Mark: I know it was when I was working but I said no, no interest, I don't want to go to Russia. Andy: I would have loved it. Mark: No, because at that stage in the mid-90s there were a lot of people that I worked with, not worked with, but were getting, no they were getting kidnapped. Andy: Yes, but that was the best time to go, Mark. That was the best time to go. Yeah, but look, a friend of mine went over there with a band to put on a music thing. Yeah, but it doesn't matter. It was the same time. It was in the 90s and ⁓ it was sort of semi-legitimate. But anyway, they went over, they did the gig and... Mark: slightly different target demographic. Andy: They got paid with a looted gold cross from her church. Mark: What? Andy: You Mark: Well, it obviously wasn't a Russian Orthodox Church, it must have been a Catholic Church or something. Andy: I don't know, but I mean that was the way Russia was running those days. He was excellent. Mark: Yeah, anyway. Andy: We don't do it with money, we are going to give you religious bollocks. Iconography! Don't go through something to declare on the way out. Mark: a gold cross, can I put them handbag? Handbaggage. Alright, so that was one thing in 1703 or whatever, donkey's years ago. Come on, let's have something more contemporary. Andy: Okay, how about during your lifetime? 1837. Wild Bill Hickok was born. Mark: Yeah, what happened? Was he, what, was he real? Andy: Yeah, of course. Not like King Arthur. He was... Mark: No, but that's what I mean. I mean, why were you amazed I thought King Arthur was real when you were telling me while Bill Hickok was real? That wasn't his name, was it? Hickok. Andy: His name was James Butler Hickok, better known as Wild Bill, born in Illinois. He was ⁓ a Wild West icon. He gathered fame for his bravery, his gambling prowess, because you know, and his marksmanship. But he was shot and killed in 1876 at a saloon in Deadwood, Dakota. Mark: So how old was he? In his 30s. Andy: If he was born in 1837 and he died in 1876. So he was shot by fellow gambler Jack McCall while holding a pair of black aces and a pair of eights, which is known to this day as the dead man's hand. Mark: 37. All right, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. What a coin. Is that right? A pair of what? A pair of eights and a pair of... Andy: pair of black aces. Mark: because you'll be entertained to hear that I was so desperate to watch a half-decent movie rather than the crap that's everywhere. I actually watched The Sting yesterday. Andy: Good god, that's going back up. It's not the same, is it? Mark: No, the pacing of movies, I've said it before, the pacing of movies, even going back 30 years or whenever that was made, you get used to such a progression of storylines so quickly there's action the whole time and things. Anyway, mildly entertaining, because because Lonergan, the baddie, he was obsessed with eights, he liked eights in his hand. Don't you remember when they're playing on the train? Andy: ⁓ this is a long time since I've seen that film. Mark: Well, Lonergan is obviously the gangster and he's quite good at cheating. But is it Paul Newman? Paul Newman was even better at cheating. The fellow couldn't believe it had been beaten. Andy: Well, a hundred years after Bill Hickok was born, 1937, the Golden Gate Bridge opened. Mark: Anyway. Yes, 1930. No. Andy: San Francisco. Connecting Mark: only two years before the war started. Andy: Yes, connecting the city to Marin County over San Francisco Bay. Took five years. I haven't been to San Francisco. No, I didn't wear flowers in my hair. Mark: Have you been there? You haven't. I have, I hired a Trans Am Pontiac. This was probably in 1986 and I mean obviously there's a statute of limitation on damaging hire cars but I actually got it airborne on one of the one of those Dippy Hill things and we went up the Wobbly Street whatever that curvy street is. Andy: I don't know. Mark: I mean Trans and Pontiac, do you remember that? In England they sometimes had with eagles on them on the born-hidden ship. Andy: I do a friend of mine. Yeah, a friend of mine had a white one with an eagle on it. His dad owned. now it's all fake news. Bloody cat. ⁓ Mark: Maybe you were talking about cursed film sets. This is like a cursed radio set. Andy: The bloody cat pressed every button on my soundboard. Mark: Idiot. Yeah, I would. Andy: gonna have to sack him. I'm talking of sacking. Today will be Arabella's last day at Strange Stuff podcast. So it's kind of lucky we're doing it a day earlier. It means she gets one more go. Mark: Yep. Yep. I always say you're right. Andy: Because tomorrow she doesn't exist anymore. Mark: No, we've all got to pay our way in this world. Andy: Yeah, unfortunately, we can't afford to pay our wages. So maybe one day when we get some more Patreons, she can come back and work for us again. Mark: Yeah, but. Do you feel, would you feel as guilty sacking an AI person, if we're allowed to reveal the truth that she was in fact AI, as compared to a real person? Andy: She is real. We almost live together. We're that close. Mark: There used to be a website called, I don't mean this in a bad way at all, but I think it was literally called, Hire an Indian for a Dollar a Day or something. Andy: .com Mark: wasn't it something or a five dollar, whatever it was, ten dollars a day. mean you know anybody with data that required just simply data skills could be hired for ten dollars a day. And I'll tell you what they used to use them, them, these companies for, touching up photographs of apartments that estate agents used to put out. So they would hire these people to always have blue skies in the photographs and the beds neatly made and things like that. Andy: Hello. Why not? Mark: so anyway what i was going to suggest was arabella is probably more expensive than hiring an indian Andy: Yeah, but Arabella's got her own personality and, you know, she brings a lot to the table. Mark: Yeah, especially when she's got really strange ears. What was all that about? Andy: she was still half dressed from her Venusian advert. Mark: So you forgot to delete the funny ears. Andy: I quite, I found them quite horny. A little bit like a ⁓ night elf. Mark: ⁓ dear. All right, so sorry, what was that? 19 what? Where did we get to? Or have we done that? Have we moved on? ⁓ yes. Andy: 1937 across the Golden Gate Bridge. Well, it opened and after five years of construction and 200,000 people each paid 25 cents to walk across the damn thing on its opening day. 200,000 people. Could you imagine if it had just gone in? That would have been funny. Mark: There was a bridge quite recently that collapsed in China, but that might have been under construction, that it just went down, or newly opened. They did very well because have you seen all of those, I say all of them, number of bridges that have failed as a result of having the same frequency as the wind causes, an oscillation, and it just gets worse and worse and worse until the bridge literally shakes itself apart. Have you seen videos of that? ⁓ really? That's not uncommon. Andy: that due to the quality of the steel? Mark: No, it's due to the design, unfortunately. There's a natural resonance of any mechanical structure, and if the wind is able to generate that resonance, it's like two tuning forks. I can't now, I'm not... no, I was just about to explain the experiment that gets the ping-pong ball moving, but now I can't. Anyway, it's whether the waves are ampli... Andy: that particular frequency. Yeah. Mark: building on each other or cancelling each other out. Something like that. Anyway, alright, that was the Golden Gate Bridge. I've done it. I've driven across it. Did I tell you what happened when I was driving across the Sydney Bridge? I've probably told you if you... Andy: Amplified. Okay. Yeah, it's a bit like ssss ⁓ I was telling you about my friend who had the Trans Am Pontiac with Firebird. He had a white one and he was the son of a chap who started a company in England in the 70s? Maybe, no, maybe the 80s called Cardata. Do you remember that? Where if you, if you had a car to sell, you could put it on Cardata and it was like the first computerized company that put you in touch with buyers. Mark: Yes. Yep. I should do because... yeah. Is that right? Okay. Andy: I remember he got a hatchet job done on him on Watchdog. Watchdog used to add him on there to talk about car data because someone had complained that his car had been on there for three months and he hadn't had one phone call. Mark: the TV consumer program. Andy: And the guy said, well, of course not. You put it on a ridiculous price. What do you expect? We don't promise to sell cars. We're just a platform where you can sell your car, but you can't just put any old price on it and expect someone to go, whoa, I love that. But anyway, Max, the son, lived next door to us more or less. And I used to go out in his trans and we used to cruise up and down the Kings Road. Mark: Yeah. bet you did. Andy: Yeah, we did. Mark: you cruising in a Trans Amphontiac, a white one with Max in the driver's seat. ⁓ dear. Andy: ⁓ yep, excellent times. Anyway, in 1941... Mark: Okay, middle of the war. Andy: Yes, and it's relevant. The British Navy sank the German battleship Bismarck off the coast of France. 323 foot vessel it was, and it was sent out to intercept a British supply ship, instead of which the British engaged it and sank it, killing almost its entire 2200 crew. Mark: Alright. Holy schmozes. Where was that in the English Channel, did you say? Andy: Just off the coast of France, yeah. Mark: God, dear. Who would want to join the Navy? Seriously? Cramp conditions, shit food, away from home for six months a year. ⁓ yes, you, that's right. You were heading in that direction till it all went horribly wrong. Andy: I used to want to. Mark: Was it an automatic pass, having been a cadet and knowing all your knots and things, that you could get straight into the Navy? Andy: No, there's more to it than just knowing you're not. Anyway, we'll talk about that another time because at the moment we've moved to 1995 and this was the day Superman found his nemesis. Mark: Cryptonite. Andy: Christopher Reeve became paralysed after falling off a horse. Mark: ⁓ that's right. Yes, that's right. Horse riding. Andy: in Virginia. Mark: And unfortunately, I think he passed away a few years ago. He had 15 years, 20 years or something. Andy: He did, yeah, he's dead now. Probably not his favourite few years of life, being stuck in a wheelchair. Mark: No, but I think, you know, once you're faced with that situation, think people deal with it in different ways. People can think of all the positive things. Andy: Slightly better off than Michael Schumacher, of course. Mark: Yeah, poor old Michael Schumacher. Andy: who still being kept barely alive by his cash grabbing doctors. Mark: We don't know that. We don't know anything about him, actually. Andy: I think we can bloody well assume that's exactly what's going on. They're just draining his fucking accumulated wealth. Because he's clearly not going to get better. Mark: So if you were in that situation, you would just want to turn it off. Andy: turn it off. If I'm not breathing on my own and all you're doing is ruining my children's inheritance, turn the fucking machine off. Stop. Mark: It's a very, very interesting point. I think he is breathing by himself, but anyway, by the way, yes, by the by. No, I tend to agree, and in fact, funnily enough, very, very sadly, one of my family members is living through that at the moment. Her mum has got dementia. She's basically penniless, and she obviously can't inherit from her mother. because her mother's still alive in a dementia home and it's costing a fortune. So the daughter has to... she lives basically on benefits and her mother's loaded... was loaded. No. Andy: But she can't, but she can't, well why isn't the money coming from her mother? Mark: that the mother's not in a position to give the daughter any money because she's got dementia, she's not compus mentis and unfortunately... Andy: Well then, surely there must be some kind of help. Mark: No, they're very, very strict guidelines. Andy: That's what they get us. Mark: very strict guidelines. can make gifts to your children. ⁓ sorry. What do you have a guardian? she has the mother who's suffering for dementia has a guardian, obviously, someone who's legally responsible for taking care of her affairs. But they're very, very strict rules. And the most you can do is give your children a gift that would be considered reasonable in the circumstances. So you can't bungum 50 sterling or something you know you could give them 50 pounds but not 50,000 pounds so the money is just being whittled away and when I say whittle that sounds like a slow process it's like shoveling cash into a furnace Andy: Yeah, yeah, I know. And I bet she's not in the cheapest care home. Mark: they're all pretty much the same. Actually, ridiculous situation as it is within England. The care home is shared with those that are paying for themselves, those that have money, and those that don't have money, and completely fair, I'm not complaining about that, but the council pays. If you don't have any money, the council pays. Which I... think is completely right but I think the council should pay for everybody they're sick why is it the National Health specifically says ⁓ dementia no we don't cover that because it's too expensive it's ridiculous yeah anyway no it is absolutely crazy so my auntie she has been in hospital for nearly 10 years Andy: Yes, an act of God. Slightly insurance companies. Well, we cover everything except what you've done. What? God, that must have cost a million pounds by now. Mark: in a minute. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Anyway, next. What was the what got us onto that subject? ⁓ yes. Andy: Stop screaming you. Anyway. I don't know, but let's stop all that nonsense because we've got a lot to get through. Mark: No we don't. Now I've got lots of things to do today. It's got to be quick. 15 minutes max. Andy: You've clearly got nothing to do today, which is why you called me up. Because you never call me up unless you've got fuck all else to do. Mark: you That's not true Andy. You're the highlight of my week. No. You're the top of the list of things to do. Andy: absolutely true. Yeah, right. So today we're going to talk about a question that has kind of fascinated scientists, writers, historians, and probably everyone who's ever looked at a ruined building covered in vines and wondered what would happen if civilization ended tomorrow? I mean, what would actually happen to Earth? Mark: you I'm good at questions. Andy: If humanity suddenly just vanished, slowly and not after a decline, not because of war or climate collapse or disease, just imagine that every human on earth simply vanished in a single instant. Eight, nine billion people gone without warning. No broadcasts, no one left behind. The lights are still on. Planes are still in the air. Cars still moving, factories still running, nuclear reactors still humming. there's no one left to control any of it. So today we're going to follow Earth through the minutes, hours, centuries and even millions of years after humanity disappears. And we're going to look at what? Go on. Mark: There is a... there's a technical term for this. What is it? Entropy? When something starts to degrade, which is effectively from the moment it is produced, entropy. Is that it? So eventually everything will go back to sand, effectively. Or sand or whatever. What's it called? I better write that down because I like that word. Entropy. Andy: Entropy. Maybe. Well, we'll look at that. We'll look at what happens to... We'll look at what happens to cities, to pets, to satellites, to nuclear plants, the atmosphere, to wildlife, and eventually we'll ask the biggest question of all, which is this. When humanity is gone, what species will take our place? Not necessarily intellectually, but ecologically. Who inherits the earth? Mark: Good question. Andy: And perhaps even more interestingly, how long would it take for nature to erase us completely? Now, this episode is brought to us courtesy of Luke's imaginary girlfriend. Mark: What do you mean imaginary? Why don't you think he's got a girlfriend? Andy: No, he's definitely got someone because I told you I've seen a photo, but I know Luke. Mark: I don't know what that means and I certainly wouldn't do anything to upset Luke because he's a main source of ideas for this channel. Andy: I think... I think... Yes, I know and he's our best friend from the Isle of Dogs. But I think he might have rented her from that rentagirlfriend.com for a dollar a day, whatever, where they turn up and get a picture taken. I don't know. Mark: It is quite an interesting question, but I can't believe that you must be relying on research that's already been done. You can't be thinking up the... Andy: Well, no, I actually know I what I did was I bought the earth to a standstill by making everyone disappear and I watched what happened. What do you think I fucking done? Mark: Cats. Cats is the species that takes over. Andy: Now, again, you'd go right to the end. You will get there. But first, we're going to talk about the first hour after the people have disappeared. The first thing that anyone left, which there isn't, would notice is silence. Not complete silence, of course, far from it, because engines are still running. Electrical systems are still humming. Dogs are barking in empty houses and traffic would crash throughout the cities. But one sound disappears instantly. Human activity. No voices, no phones, no footsteps, no radio chatter, no pilots speaking to air traffic, no workers inside factories, no train conductors, bus conductors, doctors, mechanics, no one. Mark: alright we don't have to list them all there's plenty of people in eight billion you're gonna list eight billion you don't Andy: I don't want to leave anybody out. Bear in mind, I've got to make this last an hour. So within seconds, the global network of transportation begins collapsing. Cars crash. Some will coast harmlessly to a stop. Others will slam into barriers, buildings or each other. Massive pileups would choke highways, which no longer matters because nobody's using them. And ships will continue to coast across oceans without cruise. Some would drift for months. Others will run aground. Passenger planes become one of the deadliest immediate consequences. Mark: What do you mean deadly as to what? The dog population. The cat population. Andy: Well, anything that's still alive, because thousands of aircraft are in the air at any given moment. Many modern planes can fly themselves temporarily using autopilot, but eventually they run out of fuel. So one by one, the aircraft will descend uncontrolled into oceans, mountains, forests and cities. In remote regions, wreckage may remain untouched for centuries. Inside homes, pets wait, dogs scratching at doors. cats roaming through silent apartments and fish circling in tanks. Some animals will survive by escaping, others will die within days. The luckiest pets are those in rural areas where nature is close enough to reclaim them. But meanwhile, the power grid begins failing. Most electrical systems require constant balancing. Power plants can't simply run. Mark: hang on, we've jumped a bit ahead of ourselves here we've jumped a bit ahead of ourselves here because planes falling out of the sky the longest duration flight is twenty two hours so after twenty two hours all the planes that were in the air will have crashed Andy: Why? something. So I'm talking about the first hour in the first few hours. Mark: Exactly, exactly, and you're talking about already animals dying. No, I want there to be some chronological sense in what you're talking. Andy: ⁓ do want me to take it minute by minute? There is chronological sense. power plants can't simply run unattended forever. Within hours, blackouts will begin spreading across continents and cities that once glowed all night will start going dark. Mark: I think you'd be surprised. I think power grids have so many automated backup systems that I think actually power would continue flowing for more than a few hours. That's literally days or weeks, I would say. Andy: It depends on what part of the world you're talking about. Because not everybody has the same kind of power grid. Mark: Well, of course. No, well you're right, yeah. Andy: So one region after another will collapse into blackness. The internet will survive briefly. Servers will continue operating automatically. Messages continue bouncing through cables and satellites, but there's nobody left to read them. Eventually though, calling systems will fail. Data centers will overheat and the modern digital world will die quietly in empty rooms. And then comes one of the greatest dangers. Mark: Danger? What danger? could danger to what? Andy: Nuclear power stations. Whatever's left alive on earth. Nuclear power stations. Mark: No, they're not a danger. Andy: Of course they are. Modern reactors have automatic shutdown systems. Most would successfully scram, which is an emergency shutdown procedure. But shutting down a reactor isn't enough. Spent fuel pods still require cooling. And backup generate is eventually foul. So within days or weeks, some facilities will experience meltdowns. Not every plant Mark: Thank you. Andy: but enough to create regional contamination. So large exclusion zones will spread around abandoned reactors. Ironically, these regions Mark: Exclusion zones? Who's there? What, the dog's gonna start putting up yellow ribbons? Andy: Again, again the local wildlife. What have you got against nature? Mark: exclusion. I don't and in fact I was just about to cite they've been recently reporting about the wildlife that went back to Chernobyl remarkably soon after the disaster. Andy: Ironically, these regions may later become wildlife refuges, similar to what happened around Chernobyl. Mark: You don't need a script, you can just ask me what's going on. Andy: Nature often returns faster than humans expect when people disappear. Even poisoned land becomes habitat eventually. So by the end of the first week, the world is pretty much dark. Cities still stand. Mark: Apart from daylight, apart from the daylight, it's pretty much dark. Andy: We're not going to get through this are we in an hour? It's simple as that. This is going to be a two parter. Simply because you're being fucking saucy. Mark: No it's not. I'm not! You're in darkness, not darkness, you've got the bloody sun that's still circulating or is that gonna fail as well? Andy: I feel like you should be in the same dementia home as your auntie. Mark: you See ya. Andy: Cities are still standing, but civilization has stopped breathing. So let's move on to the first year. After humans. Now without maintenance, modern civilization begins unraveling astonishingly fast. Humanity doesn't realize how much of the world survives only because billions of people are constantly repairing it. Roads will crack very quickly. Subway tunnels flood once pumps stop operating. Underground infrastructure will fill with water. In cities like New York, entire transit systems will become submerged. Steel of course will begin rusting immediately. Wood swells and rots and glass breaks from storms and temperature changes. Plants will begin growing through every opening. because nature is relentless. Not dramatic or emotional, but just patient. And patience beats concrete. And within months, wild animals will move into suburbs. Coyotes will roam neighborhoods, deer will graze on golf courses, bird populations will explode in areas once crowded with people. In tropical climates, vegetation will expand almost violently. Roads will vanish completely beneath vines, buildings disappear behind walls of green. In colder climates, decay is slower but still unstoppable. But water is the true destroyer. Once roofs crack and drainage systems fail, every freeze-thaw cycle will tear structures apart. Many domestic animals will die out rapidly. Highly specialised breeds simply can't survive without humans. Bulldogs with breathing problems, factory farmed chickens, certain dairy cattle. They were designed for human systems, not nature. But some species adapt brilliantly. Feral pigs will spread rapidly. Dogs will form packs. And cats will become highly successful hunters. They are already. Rats of course thrive. Cockroaches thrive, pigeons thrive. The species best adapted to human civilization are suddenly inheriting its ruins. And then there are the oceans. Commercial fishing will stop instantly and this alone transforms marine ecosystems. Fish populations will begin recovering, wells rebound, Coral reefs will still struggle from warming oceans and acidification, but industrial destruction slows dramatically. Shipping noise will disappear and the oceans will become quieter than they have been for centuries. Meanwhile, the atmosphere begins changing. Carbon emissions plummet almost overnight. Factories stop, cars stop, air travel stopped. But climate change doesn't suddenly reverse. Carbon dioxide already released remains in the atmosphere for decades or even centuries. Earth continues warming for some time. Yet eventually forests expand, grasslands reclaim abandoned farmland, and plants begin absorbing enormous amounts of carbon. Humanity's ecological footprint starts fading. Not immediately, but noticeably. By the end of first year, the world already looks alien. Cities remain recognisable, but the process has begun. Earth is taking itself back. Mark: I want to go back to the animal bit. So, animals that are present in Sweden, because that's where we live, what would be the hierarchy of animals? Who are the alpha animals? Andy: ⁓ Wolf. Wolf. Mark: Yeah, wolf. ⁓ bear. Good one. Andy: Wolf and Bear. Mark: wolves and bears. So, they're carniv... No, actually bears are herbivores. Andy: Not if they catch you. Mark: No, no, no. No bears are herbivore. They don't eat meat. Do they? No. They don't. Andy: Why do they course they do they eat people? What, do they just kill them and play with them? That's polar bears. Only polar bears do that. They hunt humans for fun. Mark: Yeah. Yeah, but just because they see them as... no no no no no no funny enough polar bears are carnivores but the ordinary brown bear they eat bloody berries and honey haven't you ever seen Winnie the Pooh you idiot he doesn't go gnawing away at what's the little boy called no but it is interesting what what what would become the dominant Andy: Piglet. Christopher Robin Mark: dominant species. Wolves certainly because they're pack predators so they would be pretty difficult to stop. Rats and shit like that, that would be pretty horrible because they would go wild wouldn't they? Because, you're right, domesticated cattle, now they would, I think, I think they would adapt quite quickly. mean, there's grassland and things. Andy: No, no, there is no grassland in Sweden. Mark: Of course there is, but gardens also... no, you're right, in the winter. Absolutely, you're right, in the winter they would definitely struggle. The first winter would probably take out most of the cattle. Andy: for maybe three weeks of the year. So let's move forwards 10 years. A decade after humanity is gone. Many cities are barely functional as structures anymore because without maintenance, glass skyscrapers become deadly. Windows shatter, rain enters interiors, steel frames are eroding, entire sections collapse, and wooden homes in wet climates rot very quickly. Suburbs, yes, Mark: No. No. Andy: Suburbs become forests interrupted by ruins. Street signs Mark: Now, think modern buildings would last a hell of I would say more than a decade, more like a hundred years before they start falling down. Andy: Once you've got water getting inside a building, it's game over. Mark: even a concrete building. Andy: Yes, because the interior is not as robust as the exterior. It's like injecting a virus into your body. You can throw a virus at somebody's head and nothing will happen. But if you inject that virus into the bloodstream, it's bye bye. Mark: No, no, that, that, no, no, you've lost the plot. Just think of the number of ancient buildings that still exist thousands of years later and you're saying ten years later the buildings will start falling down. Andy: We're going to talk about those. We're going to talk about those and you will see that they bear no relation to what we're talking about here. Please do not critique my podcast before I barely scratch the surface. Mark: My podcast? Our podcast? I keep having to correct you. Andy: Well clearly one of us is not working in cahoots with the other here. Mark: Goats, that's a good word. Andy: So street signs would disappear beneath vegetation. So you'd be fucked trying to find your way home. Mark: Which, what the f... Do you think the deer will get lost because they don't have street signs? How many reading deer? Andy: Parking lots will crack apart as roots push upwards, but one of the most dramatic changes will happen at night, course, because darkness has returned. And for most of human history, Earth at night was truly dark. Modern civilisation erased that, but now the stars have returned. And from orbit, the planet no longer glows with electric grids. Astronauts, if any truly existed, would see a world transformed. Wildlife populations continue shifting. Some species boom, others would collapse. Animals dependent on humans would disappear. Others finally recover from centuries of pressure. Large predators would expand into territories that they abandoned long ago. Wolves would spread through Europe and North America, and bears would reclaim mountain regions. Elephants would expand where habitat allows. Urban areas become strange ecological zones. Cities are warmer than surrounding regions because of concrete and infrastructure. And even abandoned, they create unique environments. And some species adapt significantly well, specifically to ruins. Birds nest in skyscrapers, foxes will dead inside collapsed buildings, and monkeys will occupy tropical cities. Nature doesn't restore a prehistoric world, it creates a new one. Human influence still remains everywhere, plastic drifting through the ocean, synthetic chemicals still persist in soil, concrete landscapes alter drainage patterns. Even abandoned farmland changes ecosystems for centuries. And then there are the dams. Most major dams will survive initially, but without maintenance erosion will slowly weaken them. Some collapse catastrophically, entire river systems change course and floodwaters tear through abandoned settlements. Hydroelectric reservoirs drain, ancient valleys re-emerge. Rivers begin behaving naturally again, and this triggers massive ecological shifts. Wetlands return. Fish migration routes reopen and floodplains regenerate. In many places, biodiversity increases dramatically. By 10 years after humanity disappears, Earth is no longer a human planet with traces of nature. It's becoming a natural planet with traces of humanity. Mark: Are you waiting for a reaction? You stopped talking there. Andy: I thought you'd have something to say. You've had something to say every minute of our... Mark: How is just you got it all wrong. The dam isn't going to collapse in 10 years. Of course it's not. Do you know how long concrete lasts? Andy: I haven't. Of course it is. We're gonna talk about that. So 100 years later, after a century, anyone alive today would no longer exist, but we know that because everyone's gone. Human civilization is now archaeology. Most wooden structures are gone. Many steel bridges have collapsed. Road networks are fragmented and overgrown. Only the largest stone and concrete structures still dominate landscapes. Skyscrapers in particular fare surprisingly poorly. Yes, many modern towers rely on constant maintenance. And without repairs, corrosion destroys them from within, like what I told you. Glass fails, steel weakens, and entire buildings collapse into enormous rubble fields. Cities become forests, punctuated by skeletal ruins. Mark: What? Andy: In deserts, preservation lasts longer. Dry climates protect structures. Las Vegas may remain more recognisable longer than London, instance. Ancient stone monuments survive the best. The pyramids of Egypt likely outlasting all modern cities. Mount Rushmore remains. A massive tunnel survive. Some subway systems become underground lakes. But meanwhile, satellites begin falling. Low Earth orbit becomes chaotic. Without course corrections, many satellites eventually re-enter the atmosphere and burn up. Space junk collisions create debris clouds. Humanity's technological shell around the Earth decays. But radio signals continue drifting into space. TV broadcasts, military radar pulses, and fragments of human culture expand outward at light speed, but earth itself grows quieter. Forests spread aggressively across abandoned farmland. Mark: Sorry, sorry, What is the bloody logic? A hundred years ago, the BBC stopped bloody sending out radio signals. So where are these radio signals coming from that are going to be radiating? No! Andy: It's the same radio signals. They don't stop just because Earth has finished. The ones that have been sent out are still travelling. Mark: Don't be ridiculous, there's a finite distance that radiosignal, the wave strength degrades. Andy: We have got satellites up there sending signals out now. Mark: Yeah, well clearly they're not doing very well because we haven't contacted anybody, have we? Oh God! Andy: ⁓ haven't we? Now this becomes one of the largest rewilding events in planetary history. Animals migrate through Mark: But again, that statement is ridiculous because we don't know anything about other planets. The biggest rewilding event in planetary history. What do you know about? Well, of course it is, you idiot, because we're living through the experience. Andy: What are you talking about? Our planet, our planetary history. ⁓ my lord, this is hard work. Mark: rewilding. Andy: Animals migrate through corridors once blocked by cities and highways. Species extinction rates slow right down. Some endangered animals recover dramatically, but not everything heals. Certain pollutants will persist for centuries. Heavy metals remain in sediments, microplastics are still circulating through the ecosystems, and radiation zones linger around the worst reactor failures. Humanity leaves scars. Yet Earth has survived asteroid impacts, supervolcanoes, ice ages, mass extinctions. Life is extraordinarily resilient. The planet doesn't miss us. Not because humanity was insignificant, because we transformed Earth more rapidly than almost any species ever has. But Earth itself is larger than civilization. Mark: ⁓ Andy: larger than memory and much larger than us. So now we'll move to a thousand years later. Mark: Yeah, I'm sure the research is pretty accurate on speculating what's going to happen in a thousand years. Yeah. Andy: A thousand years after humanity disappears, most evidence of modern civilisation is gone. Not all of it, but most. Cities have collapsed into uneven hills of rubble, buried beneath vegetation and sediment. Forests will cover highways. Entire neighbourhoods disappear beneath rising seas. In some places, future intelligent species, if they ever evolved, might struggle to understand what happened here. Artifacts remain, ceramics will survive, some plastics survive, and bronze objects will endure. Stone monuments remain partially intact. But digital civilization is dead. Servers decayed centuries ago. Cloud storage has vanished. Almost all human knowledge disappears unless it's preserved physically. Ironically, Printed books on acid-free paper would outlast massive data centers. And there's another strange possibility. Domesticated species continue evolving. Without humans guiding breeding, dogs will diverge into countless ecological forms. Some will become wolf-like, others specialize in scavenging. Cats remain amongst the most successful predators, rats becoming even more widespread, and pigeons will continue thriving near ruins. Nature doesn't erase humanity cleanly, it absorbs humanity. Human-made materials become part of geological layers. Future rock strata contain concrete, aluminium, plastic and radioactive isotopes. So geologists today call this Anthropocene. or the Anthropocene. A human age written into stone, because even after humanity disappears, that layer will remain, like a planetary scar, or perhaps a signature. Meanwhile, ecosystems stabilise into new balances. Some regions become vastly richer in wildlife than they are today. Others remain altered permanently. Climate continues changing according to processes humanity already triggered. Glaciers will retreat, sea levels rise and coastal cities will vanish underwater. Places like Miami, Shanghai and parts of Bangladesh may disappear entirely beneath the sea. Mark: Sorry, why are we assuming that the temperature of the planet goes up to cause mass flooding and increase sea levels? Why are we thinking that? Andy: because the carbon dioxide levels in the atmosphere can stay for centuries. Mark: But global warming is not going to continue for centuries. Andy: What do you think causes alleged global warming? Mark: No, I'm not disputing that, but the point is that if your argument was true, then any attempt to reduce carbon emissions today won't have an impact for two or three hundred years. Andy: Yeah, because you can't just reverse it. You have to slow it down and stop it before it will start reversing. Mark: Yeah, but it makes a nonsense of attempting to keep the temperature increase to one and a half degrees. Andy: There are anyone who says. Well, the green movement is a nonsense, isn't it? It's a fucking scam. Mark: Well course it's not. It's not a scam, it just depends what time scale you're working to. Andy: They're trying to tell you that you can save the world today, which is a lie. You can't save the world today. Mark: We're all doomed are we? Is this what you're saying? So on the 27th of May, 2026, you're basically, Strangestuff Podcast is predicting we're all doomed. Andy: You can, what, take away? We're doomed. We're doomed. Captain Manoring. So coral ecosystems shift, weather patterns evolve and Earth enters a future that thankfully no human will witness. Mark: Why? Andy: Because we've all gone. Mark: Yeah, but you're predicting it's going to be worse. No, no, no, but you're predicting it's going to be... ⁓ right, I thought you did. Andy: Have you forgotten the premise of this episode? No, I didn't say it was going to be worse. I'm saying thankfully no humans will be there to see it because we would ruin that as well. 10,000 years later, this is difficult for the human mind to comprehend because civilisation itself is barely that age. Mark: Most of this episode is difficult to comprehend. What are you talking about? Andy: ⁓ my lord. It's difficult for you to comprehend because you cannot see any further the next market crash. Now at this point, Earth has almost completely reclaimed the planet. Most surface evidence of humanity is gone. Steel is fully oxidised, concrete fractures into dust, forests, deserts, glaciers and oceans erase boundaries. Only the most durable structures remain. Some tunnels, massive stone monuments, deep mines and certain landfills, and of course traces of radioactivity. The atmosphere looks different. Carbon dioxide levels gradually decline from their industrial peak. Forests and oceans absorb enormous amounts. Global temperatures eventually stabilize. A new climate equilibrium emerges. Wildlife is now entirely reorganized. Evolution continues and species adapt to niches that humanity created. Some become larger. some become smaller. New species will emerge, old ones will vanish. And the world no longer resembles the ecosystems that humans knew. And somewhere in this future earth, one question becomes fascinating. What animal becomes dominant? Not necessarily in intelligence, but in influence. Who inherits the ecological throne? And the answer depends on what you mean by dominant. If means sheer biomass, then insects will win. Ants alone outweigh humanity. If dominance ⁓ Mark: I think that's a bit of a YouTube nonsense and there's more biomass of ants than there are of humans. Andy: Yes. Why not? Mark: Where's your sauce on that one, Andy? Andy: YouTube. Mark: I mean, you might be right. Andy: If you think about it, if you disturb an ant's nest and there's one next door, enough ants will come out of that to scare a fully grown human being. Mark: Ants are everywhere. Maybe. Andy: Now, if dominance means adaptability, rats will be the candidates, because they reproduce rapidly, they eat almost anything and they thrive in nearly every environment. But if dominance means ecological expansion into abandoned human spaces, then you've got several contenders. You've got canines, corvids, octopi and primates. Mark: I don't even know what a corvid, it was a corvid. Andy: Do you know what? I meant to look that one up. A corvid. And perhaps most interesting, I'm getting messages while you're doing that. I'm just going to have a quick look. Mark: You don't know. I'll do it for you. Covid. Carry on. Hang on. Google. Yes. No, stay in Brownsley. COVID. Andy: So perhaps most... Mark: ⁓ well that's interesting. It's apparently the Crow family. Andy: ⁓ yes, crows. Mark: Yeah. Andy: Yeah, because they're pretty intelligent and perhaps most interestingly raccoons. Yes, raccoons. Highly adaptable, dextrous paws and problem solving intelligence. Urban survival skills. They already live very comfortably alongside humanity and in a world of ruins, they might flourish. Crows and ravens equally fascinating because corvids possess remarkable intelligence. Mark: Raccoons? Why? Andy: They can use tools, they have good memory, social learning, and some scientists compare aspects of their cognition to primates. Given enough evolutionary time, could they become even more advanced? Possibly. Then there's the octopuses. Perhaps the strangest candidate, because they're incredibly intelligent, they're curious, capable of solving puzzles. but they are limited by short lifespans and solitary behaviour. Intelligence alone isn't quite enough. Civilisation requires social continuity, and that may be humanity's rarest trait. Not intelligence itself, but cumulative culture. The ability to build knowledge across generations. No other species has mastered it the way humans have, at least not yet. Can you stop screaming at me? One million years later, now we enter deep time. Mark: Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. No, you've missed... Look, I know Hollywood sometimes gets things a little bit wrong, but have you never seen the Hollywood movies Planet of the Apes? You're talking about bloody octopus and koala bears and rats and shit. What about our closest ancestor, our closest cousin? Andy: I said prior mates. Mark: No, you're only comparing it to an octopus is nearly as smart as a primate. Andy: Yeah, no, I said that they would be up there. Mark: I'm sure it's chimpanzees, because they're the smartest. Andy: Actually, think orangutans are slightly above chimps in the intelligence quotient. Well, not really. I'm splitting species. Mark: Alright, alright, now you're just splitting hairs. I would have thought that really speaking... wouldn't chimpanzees? They'd learn to ride a horse pretty quick, wouldn't they, and once they've learned how to ride a horse? Andy: and they developed the Smith and Wesson. Mark: Exactly. It wouldn't take too long to catch up. Certainly, now you're going to go to a million years, so that's sort of evolution, natural selection and all that sort of stuff. So what do you reckon is going to happen in a million years? Andy: Well, Earth is profoundly transformed. Continents have shifted. Ice ages can come and go and species will evolve dramatically. Almost nothing recognisable from modern civilisation survives on the surface. Mount Rushmore eroded. The Great Wall faded. Most traces of humanity exist only as subtle chemical signatures in rock layers. Future geologists whether alien, artificial or evolved descendants of modern animals, such as your apes, might detect an abrupt layer rich in carbon emissions, plastics, concrete particles and radioactive isotopes, and they would know that something unusual had happened. A species altered the planet rapidly and then vanished. Human bones are now rare fossils. Cities become compressed geological anomalies. The oceans will absorb much of our legacy. Plastic fragments will settle into sediments. Even now, humanity is creating fossils of itself. Meanwhile, life continues evolving without us. Perhaps mammals remain dominant. Perhaps birds diversify enormously and perhaps climate shifts favour entirely different ecosystems. But the earth keeps moving, it always does. And eventually, even our greatest achievements become invisible. And that's difficult for humans to emotionally accept, because we imagine civilisation as permanent. But permanence barely exists in geology. Mountains disappear, oceans appear and disappear. Entire species dominate for millions of years and then vanish completely. Dinosaurs ruled Earth far longer than humans have existed, and now they survive mainly as birds. Mark: What do you reckon? You were talking about human achievements all forgotten. What... What have we achieved? Andy: Fuck all. Fuck all, do you know what? Mark: You know, in the grand scheme of things. Andy: Do know what I read today in the paper and I didn't want to talk about it because it's too ridiculous. But NASA have announced in conjunction with amazon.com that they are going to build a city sized moon base on the moon, beginning or habitable by 2032. Mark: Habitable. Andy: Fuck off, you wankers. Honestly, who are they kidding? Who makes money out of this particular scam? Mark: Not Jeff, surely? Andy: There isn't a film set large enough to carry off this particular scam. A city-sized moon base. They can't even fucking get a person up there. How are you going to get millions of tons of building stuff up there? Mark: I thought we are going to put a human on the moon in a couple of years time. Andy: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, of course they are. This is such a load of fucking, I don't even want to go down, I'm getting mad just thinking about it. Talking about building a fucking city on the moon in seven years. Fucking idiots. Honestly, whoever thought that up, I'm just morons. Anyway, one day humanity may be reduced to equally strange remnants, just a fossilized footprint or a radioactive signal, a mystery. So could nature fully heal? Which raises an important question. Can Earth ever completely recover from humanity? And that answer depends on what you mean by recover. If life survives, absolutely, life would flourish. In many regions, biodiversity would rebound dramatically. Forests would regrow, wells would recover and predators would return. Rivers would find their own natural flow again. The biosphere would remain vibrant. But if recovery means returning Earth to exactly how it was before humans, that's impossible. Humanity has already changed the planet permanently. We've altered atmospheric chemistry. We've moved species across entire continents. We've created synthetic materials unknown in natural history. We've caused extinctions, reshaped rivers, and changed climate systems. So even after humanity disappears, Earth still carries our fingerprint for millions of years. But there's a... Well I can't because... Mark: would you want to be around? would you want to be... no, but when you said all human, there's obviously going to be a few pockets of I don't know, some genetically beneficial makeup or whatever that allows just a group, small group of individuals to survive Andy: They wouldn't survive long because they'd be standing there going, what the fuck just happened? Hang on, I'll get me mum on the phone. Mum? Hello? Hello? Hello? There's no one there. Mark: No, but I don't know, I wonder if, yeah. How long, I think next week's episode should be, how long would you last if all other humans disappeared? Andy: I'll be fine because I'm a cannibal. Mark: I mean some people wouldn't survive very long without the infrastructure that exists today. Andy: I wouldn't be happy surviving without the infrastructure that exists today. I'm in my comfort zone here. Mark: you've got your heating. I mean you'd move out of Sweden pretty damn pronto. Andy: I'm in Sweden for God's sake. mean, you've got to have your heating. Otherwise you're just going to die. Mark: No, exactly. So you would definitely have to move to a more temperate climate. So down to the Mediterranean. How would you get there? Andy: Yeah, which means luckily I can, luckily I can sail. Mark: ⁓ you might become my best friend, my new best friend. Andy: You couldn't afford the captain's rates. BFF. Mark: My B, what do you call it? BSB? does Camp Paris? BFF. Best what? ⁓ Best Friends Forever. Yeah, you would actually if you could sail. We'd have to steal a boat though. Andy: Best friends forever. ⁓ I think I could probably live with that guilt. Mark: Maybe. Andy: So. made me lose my space. Mark: I think we would, I think you and I funnily enough would cope quite well if we were the only people left on earth. Andy: Yeah, because I would be the new overlord and you would do all the restructuring. You'd be in the garage rebuilding humanity for me. Mark: You would be the king of nothing. You think I'd be your serf? You think it would... Andy: Mark, I need a sauna. Yeah, yeah, I'll knock one up. Mark: ⁓ dear. Andy: So Earth would carry our fingerprint for millions of years, but there's another perspective. Humans are not separate from nature, we are nature. Everything humanity built came from Earth. We built steel from rock, plastic came from ancient life, and concrete from minerals. So cities themselves are geological expressions of one species. So perhaps civilization was never outside nature, just another phase of it. Mark: Don't tell me. Andy: A strange one, right? A loud one and a brief one. So what survives longest? What are the final fingerprints of humanity? So the obviously mundane objects which would outlast entire cities will be plastic, glass, ceramics, radioactive waste, certain bronze sculptures and deep underground structures. The Voyager probes may survive longer than anything on earth because right now Mark: Concrete. Andy: Spacecraft allegedly built by humans are travelling through interstellar space and they will continue long after Earth forgets humanity. Those probes may continue drifting silently between stars with golden records attached to them which contain music, greetings and sounds of Fragments of civilization launched into the cosmic darkness. And there's something haunting about that. The possibility that humanity's final surviving artefact may not even be on Earth at all, but floating forever in space. And yet perhaps our greatest legacy is biological. Humans reshaped evolution itself. We altered ecosystems worldwide. Selective breeding transformed countless species, corn, dogs, cattle, rice, bananas and wheat. Humanity became an evolutionary force. So even after we vanish, the consequences will continue unfolding. Now we arrive at the final question. Could another intelligent civilization eventually emerge? Possibly. Evolution has produced intelligence multiple times in primates, cetaceans, birds, cephalopods, complex cognition, is not unique to humans. But technological civilisation may be extraordinarily rare. Humans benefited from many unlikely conditions. Opposable thumbs, fire, language, social cooperation, long childhoods, agriculture and stable climate periods. We also had accessible fossil fuels and cumulative knowledge. A future intelligent species might never rediscover oil or coal because humanity has already consumed the easiest reserves. And that could permanently change the trajectory of future civilizations. Perhaps another species evolves ⁓ intelligence but never industrializes, which would be a good thing. Or perhaps millions of years from now, descendants of today's animals rediscover ruins buried beneath rock. Imagine crows examining fossilised skyscrapers or octopus-like beings studying radioactive strata, trying to understand the vanished species that altered an entire planet. They might never know our names, but they would know that we existed because Earth itself remembers. And that brings us to the end. of today's journey through a world after humanity. Mark: I think you've forgotten one pretty big question. Andy: I started my closing statement, could you wait till I finish it before... Otherwise I've just got to start again with my closing statement and then it's just timing, timing. A planet that continues turning long after cities collapse and mountains crumble. And there's something unsettling about imagining humanity disappearing, but there's also something strangely humbling. Mark: per Go on then, go on then, finish, finish. Andy: Earth isn't fragile because humans exist. Humans are fragile because Earth exists. And while civilization feels permanent when we live inside it, the perspective of geological time, humanity is only a brief event. A remarkable one, but a destructive one. Also a creative one, but brief. And if we vanish tomorrow, life will continue. And that is what would happen if all humans disappeared overnight. Yes. Mark: Am I allowed to ask a question now? Well, bearing in mind the number of people that think that God of some description created the earth, having obviously screwed it up the first time round, do think God would have another go? Andy: Erm... There is no God. Mark: Do think it would be Humanity 2, the sequel? Andy: First of all, there is no God. And the definition of stupidity is repeating an experiment. Mark: Yeah, doing the same thing over and over again expecting different outcomes. Andy: expecting a different outcome. hopefully we're a one off. Mark: Whoever came up with the script not saying you wrote every word is pretty down on the human race. Andy: But there's with good reason. We are a plague on this planet. Mark: So why are you so anti-Green Party? Andy: because they're liars and they're idiots. Mark: ⁓ because they're providing us with false hope, you mean? We are doomed. Andy: It's not just that, they are literally, I mean, I'm down on the Green Party because because of them, tax is given governments an increasing tax reason. ⁓ we can pretend it's because of being green and we can charge them an extra 50 pence an hour for their electricity. It's just a nonsense. It's just a scam. There's nothing weakened, especially in England, which is responsible for less than 1 % of the world's pollution. So going net zero is really going to save the planet. What a fucking load of crock of shit. Mark: Now, I'm very happy to say that I don't align myself with Donald Trump in any way whatsoever, but you seem to have found a common attitude. Andy: Me. ⁓ well, I'm sorry but- Mark: So how do feel now being aligned with that useless waste of space? Andy: Look, tell me I'm wrong about the UK's pollution and net zero nonsense. What difference can the UK make and to charge everyone in the UK an extra 30 % tax to pay for our net zero, which will make no difference to the rest of the world at all. It's just robbery. It's a scam. Mark: and nobody's never you know see that's where everybody says now if i do something about making the debate billion people do something it will make a difference what do you mean they are everybody is everybody who isn't Andy: 8 billion people will not do anything. That's the whole point. No, they're not. China and India are reopening coal mines. They're building new ones. It's just, you can't... Mark: Look, yeah, but this is just YouTube talk. Who is the biggest producer, who is the biggest user of solar power, solar cells in the world? China. Andy: No, it's true! No idea. And who produces more steel and more coal than anybody else in the world? China. Mark: they don't produce more coal. Andy: Well, they certainly use coal-fired nuclear power stations and coal-fired generators. Mark: You see, that basically sums you up, Andy. Can you explain to me the concept of a coal-powered nuclear power station? Andy: They are... You have to generate steam somehow to run your nuclear power station. Mark: I think we better end this episode now. Otherwise, that coal powered nuclear power station, can we have that as the advertisement where you explain what a coal powered... What was that? Andy: from our sponsors. Co-fired! Mark: Nuclear power station. Yep. I'm looking forward It was you know, actually it was a very interesting Concept not particularly well executed but it was a very interesting concept what happens to the earth if we just literally disappeared I mean it might happen Andy: and our coal-fired rockets in space. Mark: I mean, if we got, I know you think it's a load of nonsense, but you can at least accept the possibility that there could be a virus that wipes out the human race and it could happen quite quickly. I mean, I reckon six months and everybody could be gone. Yeah. Yeah, no, you're right. So, you know, it's not a crazy concept. Andy: It would happen very quickly, especially if it was a man-made virus, which probably already exists. Mark: Yeah, not a very uplifting thought though, is it? I mean, really, it's lucky I'm a positive individual as I'll be just sticking my head in the oven, even though it's electric. Andy: Positive you were negative about every step of that fucking podcast Mark: No I wasn't, not at all, I was just questioning the complete lack of logic. Andy: Well there wasn't a lack of logic. It was actually very well put together. Mark: No, it was a good one. Well done. ⁓ hang on a second. It was Luke who came up with the idea. Andy: was Luke's imaginary girlfriend. We'll call her... Lukella. Mark: I think Luke's in... Why can't we call her Arabella? She can replace Arabella. Andy: ⁓ I'm gonna get an angry email from Luke. Luke. Mark: Just because you don't have a girlfriend doesn't mean other people do have girlfriends, if that makes sense. Andy: Luke knows I have got a girlfriend but I've just had to fire her. Mark: That's exactly right. Some virtual AI generated. Andy: Anyway, that brings us to the end of this episode. I hope you found it, and the end of civilisation, interesting, entertaining and informative. See you again next week and on Wednesday if you're a Patreon. If you're not a Patreon, go to patreon.com backslash strange stuff podcast and become one. Bye for now. Mark: If not the end of civilization. Yeah. Alright. Good timing. Yep. Yeah. Cheerio for now.