Latest / Mentor365 Services, Inc. / Outgrowing People Without Guilt: The Courage to Grow
Transcript
- 0:00Welcome back to Mentor365. Today we are talking about something that many people
- 0:06experience during growth, but very few people feel uncomfortable discussing openly.
- 0:13So we are talking about outgrowing people without guilt.
- 0:18If you have been on a healing journey for any amount of time,
- 0:22you may have noticed something interesting.
- 0:25As you change, some of your relationships begin to change too.
- 0:30Conversations feel different. Priorities feel different. The things that once
- 0:35connected you no longer seem as strong.
- 0:38And sometimes you find yourself wondering what happened.
- 0:42The truth is sometimes nothing happened Sometimes growth happened,
- 0:48One of the hardest realities of personal growth is Realizing that not every
- 0:53relationship is meant to grow with you in the same way,
- 0:57Some people are part of a chapter Some people are part of a season Some people
- 1:02are part of a lifetime And learning the difference requires wisdom, maturity, and faith,
- 1:08Many of us were raised to believe that loyalty means holding on no matter what.
- 1:15That if someone has been in our life for a long time, we should keep that relationship
- 1:20exactly as it is forever.
- 1:23But life does not always work that way. People change, circumstances change,
- 1:28priorities change, and as you heal and grow, your needs may change too.
- 1:34That does not make you disloyal. That makes you human.
- 1:38One reason people struggle with
- 1:40outgrowing relationship is because they confuse growth with rejection.
- 1:46They think that creating distant means they no longer care.
- 1:50They think that setting boundaries means they are being selfish.
- 1:54They think that choosing peace means they are abandoning someone.
- 1:58But growth is not rejection. Boundaries are not punishment. and choosing peace is not selfish.
- 2:06Sometimes the healthiest thing you can do is acknowledge that a relationship
- 2:10no longer supports who you are becoming.
- 2:13That can be difficult to accept, especially when there is a history involved.
- 2:19History carries memories, emotions, and familiarity. It reminds us of who we were.
- 2:26It reminds us of what we survived together. And because of that,
- 2:31we often hold on longer than we should.
- 2:35But history alone is not enough to sustain a healthy relationship.
- 2:40A healthy relationship requires mutual respect.
- 2:44It requires growth. It requires support. It requires the ability to celebrate
- 2:50each other's evolution rather than resist it.
- 2:54As you continue healing forward, you may notice that some people are uncomfortable with your growth.
- 3:02They may question your boundaries. They may criticize your decisions.
- 3:06They may say you have changed. And the truth is you have changed. You were supposed to.
- 3:12The goal of healing was never to stay the same.
- 3:16The goal was to become healthier, wiser, and more aligned with your purpose.
- 3:21Sometimes people miss the version of you that require less accountability.
- 3:27Sometimes they miss the version of you that always said yes.
- 3:32Sometimes they miss the version of you that tolerate things you no longer tolerate.
- 3:37But that does not mean you should return to that version of yourself.
- 3:42Growth requires courage. And one of the most courageous things you can do is
- 3:47remain committed to your growth.
- 3:49And even when others don't understand it. Now I want to be clear about something.
- 3:55Outgrowing people does not mean looking down on them.
- 4:00It does not mean thinking you are better than anyone else. It does not mean
- 4:04judging people who are on a different path.
- 4:07True growth comes with humility. You can appreciate people for the role they
- 4:12played in your life while also recognizing that the relationship may need to change.
- 4:18You can love people and still need distance. You can wish people well and still
- 4:24choose a different direction.
- 4:26Those things can exist at the same time. One of the greatest gifts faith gives
- 4:31us is the ability to trust that every relationship serves a purpose.
- 4:37Some people teach us a lesson. Some people provide support.
- 4:40Some people challenge us to grow. Some people help us to discover what we need.
- 4:45And some people help us to discover that we no longer need.
- 4:50Every relationship has value, even if it doesn't last forever.
- 4:55When you begin looking at relationships through that lens, guilt starts to lose its power.
- 5:01Instead of focusing on what is ending, you begin focusing on what was learned.
- 5:09Instead of feeling ashamed about changing, you begin feeling grateful for growth.
- 5:15Instead of trying to force relationships to stay the same, you allow them to evolve naturally.
- 5:21That creates freedom freedom to be yourself freedom to continue growing freedom
- 5:28to move forward without carrying unnecessary guilt,
- 5:31as you continue your journey i want you to remember that not everyone is meant
- 5:35to walk every mile of your path with you.
- 5:39And that's okay. Some people are companions for a reason.
- 5:44Some people are companions for a chapter. And a few people become companions for the entire story.
- 5:52So your job is not to force every relationship to remain the same.
- 5:58Your job is to honor what is necessary.
- 6:01I mean, what is healthy, release what no longer lines and the trust the process
- 6:08again i'm trying to say that your job is to honor what is healthy,
- 6:14release what no longer lines and trust the process see i'm human i still make mistake,
- 6:20and it's okay so trust that the right people will celebrate your growth trust
- 6:26that the right people will respect your boundaries trust that the right people
- 6:29will appreciate the person you are becoming.
- 6:33And trust that God is not removing people from your life to punish you.
- 6:38Sometimes he is creating space, space for deeper connections,
- 6:43space for a healthier relationship, space for greater peace,
- 6:48space for the next chapter of your life.
- 6:51So if you are feeling guilty because you have changed, let me remind you of something.
- 6:57Growth is not something you need to apologize for. Healing is not something
- 7:01you need to hide. Boundaries are not something you need to justify.
- 7:05And becoming a healthier version of yourself is not something you should feel guilty about.
- 7:10You are allowed to grow. You are allowed to evolve. You are allowed to choose peace.
- 7:15And you are allowed to trust that every relationship will become exactly what it is meant to become.
- 7:21So keep moving forward. Keep honoring your growth.
- 7:25And keep believing that the people who are meant to walk with you will recognize,
- 7:30respect, and celebrate the person you are becoming.
- 7:33Thank you so much for tuning in. You all take care and God bless.