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Boundaries Are Self-Respect: Say No Without Guilt · Mentor365 Services, Inc.

• 0:01
  Hi everyone welcome back so um
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  the topic for today is on boundaries or self-respect not
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  a rejection so we will start on that one so welcome again to mentor 365 services
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  a gentle space for mental and emotional healing today's topic is something we
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  all struggle with a different moments in our lives.
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  So, boundaries. What are they? What are they not? And why setting them isn't
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  rejection. It's self-respect.
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  Take a deep breath with me.
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  In and out and let's begin. So for many of us, especially those raised in cultures
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  built on loyalty and sacrifice, boundaries feel like a betrayal.
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  We are taught to give more than we have, say yes even when we are tired,
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  accept behavior that hurts, stay quiet to keep peace.
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  We learn that love means don't disappoint anyone.
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  So when we finally say the word no, it feels dangerous
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  not because it's no is
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  harmful but because we were trained to believe
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  our worth comes from pleasing sacrificing and enduring so boundaries feel like
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  rejection but they're not they are the truth so let's make it simple boundary
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  is not a wall it's a door it protects your peace, your time, your energy,
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  while still allowing safe connection.
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  A boundary is not I don't love you. A boundary is I love myself too.
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  It says I want a healthy relationship where both of us feel safe, seen, and respected.
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  Healthy boundaries are actually an invitation to a deeper connection.
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  Because love without respect is not love, it's dependency.
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  So here's the truth people don't talk about. Setting boundary is not easy. It's painful.
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  It means grieving old identities, losing people who only love you when you have
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  no limits, facing guilt, facing fear.
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  It might mean your family doesn't understand, your friends get upset,
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  people call you selfish.
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  But listen, they are not reacting to your boundary. They are reacting to the
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  end of their access without out effort.
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  Some people like you better when you didn't like yourself.
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  And when you change the rules, they feel uncomfortable. But discomfort is the
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  first step of growth, not rejection.
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  When you come from a culture built on survival, boundaries are revolutionary.
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  Many of us with immigrant family history, pain wasn't talked about. It was carried.
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  Our parents had no time for therapy or healing language.
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  Their love was cooking a meal, working extra shifts, setting money overseas.
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  They didn't know how to say, I see you. I'm proud of you. You deserve to rest.
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  So we learn love through survival, not softness.
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  And now we are the first generation saying, I can love you and still love myself.
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  That is breaking a cycle, one boundary at a time.
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  Not angry, not bitter, just different.
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  So let's clear the confusion. A boundary is not abandonment.
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  It's not disappearing without explanation.
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  It's not silent. It's not revenge.
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  A boundary sounds like I need space today. I can't help right now.
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  I won't accept being spoken to like that. I love you, but I need time alone
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  I'm saying no and that's okay You see the difference?
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  Self-respect is honest gentle and clear not emotional punishment.
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  If you ever, like never set a boundary before, start small.
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  Pick one thing this week, something that doesn't destroy the relationship but protects your peace.
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  Say, I'm tired tonight, I'll respond tomorrow. Or, I need a moment to think before I answer.
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  Or, I don't have the emotional space for this right now.
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  Tiny boundaries build confidence.
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  And soon, you discover that the one world doesn't end when you take care of yourself.
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  People who truly love you adjust people
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  who only love your compliance fade
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  either way you find truth so if
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  you're listening right now and boundaries feel terrifying remember this say
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  no to what hurts you is saying yes to the person you are becoming you don't
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  set boundaries to push people out you set them to let love in without losing
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  yourself you are allowed to choose peace You are allowed to protect your mind.
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  You are allowed to love without abandoning your own needs.
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  Boundaries are not rejection. Boundaries are self-respect. Thank you for listening today, okay?
• 5:01
  If this episode helped you, share it with someone who needs encouragement.
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  Until next time, take care of your heart and health. God bless.