Latest / HAIstoric Phonograph — irreverent dispatches from a history that never quite happened
Titanic Sinks Because Orange Is a Goddamn Horrible Colour
Send us Fan MailOn a night of frozen terror, history’s most famous maritime disaster was fatally delayed by a small but powerful group of people who simply would not be seen dead in that. Picture the scene: April 14th, 1912. The RMS Titanic, that big, unsinkable bastard, has just had a rather unfortunate threesome with the North Atlantic and a block of ice the size of Delaware. Panic is, as they say, on the menu. Up in First Class, however, the Honourable Beatrice “Bibi” Hollingsworth-Smythe had a more pressing crisis on her hands than the water currently turning the Grand Staircase into a…
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