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New Book of Bitterman, Trustworthy Crew, Cursing Dog Collar, Comedy Roulette and more. · The Steve Harvey Morning Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Today show is pre recorded, y'all know what time.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: I don't know y'all all at all?
• 0:13
  Speaker 3: Given them.
• 0:15
  Speaker 4: A bu bus things.
• 0:21
  Speaker 5: Steve listening to me, I don't joy joy.
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: You gotta use.
• 1:05
  Speaker 6: You love, you gonna turn.
• 1:31
  Speaker 7: Came to turn the mouth turn you probably got to
• 1:44
  Speaker 7: turn the mouth, turn out the water of the monjup looking.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: Come come on, you'll think, uh huh, I sure will.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: Good morning everybody. You all listen to the voice. Come on,
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: dig me now, one and only Steve Harvey got a
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: radio show.
• 2:12
  Speaker 8: Yep. Yeah.
• 2:16
  Speaker 9: Sometimes all I can say, help, man, how far I've
• 2:20
  Speaker 9: come is really unbelievable. But you know I finally figured
• 2:23
  Speaker 9: it out.
• 2:23
  Speaker 8: Man.
• 2:25
  Speaker 9: God allowed me to have the life I've had so
• 2:31
  Speaker 9: that I can become experienced at so many different things.
• 2:36
  Speaker 9: And in this experience, when I'm talking and sharing with people,
• 2:41
  Speaker 9: I will be able to relate to a lot of
• 2:43
  Speaker 9: different circumstances, not exact, but just the circumstances.
• 2:46
  Speaker 8: You know.
• 2:47
  Speaker 9: You know if a person comes to me and they say, man,
• 2:50
  Speaker 9: I've been down and out, Okay, well I know what
• 2:52
  Speaker 9: that is.
• 2:53
  Speaker 8: Man.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: I didn't I didn't have any direction. Okay, got that
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: been there? Man?
• 2:58
  Speaker 9: At one point in time, man, I just kept piwering
• 3:00
  Speaker 9: mistake on top of mistakes. Okay, So you know, I
• 3:08
  Speaker 9: think what I'm trying to say to everybody is when
• 3:10
  Speaker 9: you're going through life and life is dealing the cards
• 3:14
  Speaker 9: that it deals, I want you to understand that life
• 3:18
  Speaker 9: deals everybody these cards. The disappointment card, the setback card,
• 3:25
  Speaker 9: the failure card, the mishap card, the unexpected misery card.
• 3:32
  Speaker 9: Everybody gonna get, the grief card, everybody gonna get, the
• 3:37
  Speaker 9: rash of bad decision card, everybody gonna get them. Understand
• 3:42
  Speaker 9: that going in that everybody is gonna get.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: These cards.
• 3:51
  Speaker 9: Is how you play them, though, you know, from time
• 3:54
  Speaker 9: to time, one more time, it's how you play them.
• 3:58
  Speaker 9: Uh you know, from time to time when I'm watching
• 3:59
  Speaker 9: t I love to watch the World Series of Poker.
• 4:04
  Speaker 9: I like watching poker tournaments on TV because it's really weird.
• 4:10
  Speaker 9: What's happened to sport? To a poker they're actually trying
• 4:14
  Speaker 9: to call it a sport, you know, And as to
• 4:16
  Speaker 9: everyday guid that doesn't have to be athletically inclined to anything.
• 4:21
  Speaker 9: Who has a shot of winning a title if they
• 4:25
  Speaker 9: play their cards right. The best poker players in the
• 4:29
  Speaker 9: world don't have the best hands. They just make the
• 4:34
  Speaker 9: best plays. I've seen guys win a hand with nine
• 4:39
  Speaker 9: to two in their hand as nothing and win their
• 4:42
  Speaker 9: hand because they knew the bluff, they knew the odds,
• 4:46
  Speaker 9: they calculated risks, they made the stakes higher than the
• 4:51
  Speaker 9: other person was willing to pay. They gave off the
• 4:55
  Speaker 9: illusion that they had something when in actuality, they had nothing.
• 5:01
  Speaker 9: So what I enjoy about poker and watching it is
• 5:04
  Speaker 9: that these people, these people here, play the.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: Hand they dealt and it ain't always a good hand.
• 5:13
  Speaker 9: But it ain't whether your hand is good, And it
• 5:15
  Speaker 9: ain't whether you're gonna get dealt bad cards or not,
• 5:18
  Speaker 9: because you gonna get dealt some bad cars. Everybody ain't
• 5:20
  Speaker 9: finna get two bullets.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: In their hand. You ain't finna get two aces when
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: you get dealt. Uh.
• 5:25
  Speaker 9: You know, when you play a draw poker, some of
• 5:27
  Speaker 9: your cards gonna be nothing. But you gotta turn that
• 5:30
  Speaker 9: nothing into something. So when you get dealt these cards
• 5:33
  Speaker 9: in life, it ain't the fact that you getting to
• 5:35
  Speaker 9: keep getting them dealt. I was talking with a young
• 5:37
  Speaker 9: person yesterday and we were talking, and we keep having
• 5:41
  Speaker 9: the same conversation over and over and over and they
• 5:44
  Speaker 9: could not understand why they were not moving forward. But
• 5:47
  Speaker 9: I said, you don't understand. Every time we talk we
• 5:50
  Speaker 9: have the exact same conversation. It is simply because you
• 5:55
  Speaker 9: keep getting your cards and you playing them the same way.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: See.
• 6:00
  Speaker 9: Until you make a conscience, the conscious decision to do
• 6:05
  Speaker 9: something different, the results will continue to be the same.
• 6:10
  Speaker 9: See here's here's here's the way this works. When you're
• 6:16
  Speaker 9: dealt to disappointments in life, it's how you handle the
• 6:19
  Speaker 9: disappointments that determine their outcome and.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Who you are.
• 6:23
  Speaker 9: Because everybody gonna be disappointment, everybody gonna lose a loved one,
• 6:27
  Speaker 9: everybody gonna make a bad decision, Everybody gonna end wake
• 6:30
  Speaker 9: up one morning and have done something they regretted.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: Everybody gonna get caught at the wrong time. Every everybody
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: gonna make a mistake. It ain't just you.
• 6:40
  Speaker 9: And it's how you play your cards when they get
• 6:43
  Speaker 9: dealt to you that determine who you are. Now, how
• 6:46
  Speaker 9: do I play my cards better? First of all, it's
• 6:48
  Speaker 9: a mindset. Quit looking at everything as just the end
• 6:52
  Speaker 9: when it happens to you.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: Oh lord, woe is me?
• 6:56
  Speaker 9: No, everybody got your circumstance is somewhere. It ain't old
• 7:02
  Speaker 9: woe as me. It's hold on, man, Okay, let me
• 7:05
  Speaker 9: play this out to see how God done connected this
• 7:08
  Speaker 9: to something else.
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: See.
• 7:09
  Speaker 9: Soon as a person have a setback, what's the first
• 7:11
  Speaker 9: thing A lot of people do. They go straight negative.
• 7:13
  Speaker 9: I can't see even get a break. I can't seem
• 7:16
  Speaker 9: to move forward. Hold on, man, do you realize this
• 7:18
  Speaker 9: could be connected to something? See you got to understand, man,
• 7:23
  Speaker 9: that this thing is all connected. That you not having
• 7:25
  Speaker 9: these mishaps and these spills and accidents and falls.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: For no reason.
• 7:30
  Speaker 9: It's so you can become experienced at them. So when
• 7:33
  Speaker 9: he takes you to the next level when it happens again,
• 7:36
  Speaker 9: you have no how and how to handle it. If
• 7:38
  Speaker 9: you keep throwing yourself off the cliff every time something happened,
• 7:42
  Speaker 9: you just gonna be a cliff diverl man, Stop tripping
• 7:46
  Speaker 9: yourself out. I was talking to this young person. I
• 7:49
  Speaker 9: kept saying, and you know what, they tried to tell me.
• 7:51
  Speaker 9: I'm trying to stay positive. But the people around here
• 7:54
  Speaker 9: they just killing that.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: Oh I see.
• 7:57
  Speaker 9: So when you learn something and you know, oh, something,
• 8:01
  Speaker 9: you don't take ownership of it. You allow other people
• 8:04
  Speaker 9: to come into what you know and believe and shake
• 8:08
  Speaker 9: it loose from you. I don't care who you are.
• 8:09
  Speaker 9: You not doing me like that. Here's a deal. I
• 8:12
  Speaker 9: have a gift that was given to me from God.
• 8:15
  Speaker 9: That is the gift of comedy. That's what I've done.
• 8:17
  Speaker 9: I've made the bulk of my living on that skill set.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Right there.
• 8:22
  Speaker 9: There are comedians who are supposedly friends of mine, who
• 8:25
  Speaker 9: I've worked with, who get around in huddles with one
• 8:28
  Speaker 9: another and they say, man, Steve really ain't funny. I
• 8:31
  Speaker 9: don't see what they be laughing at. He ain't funny
• 8:33
  Speaker 9: to me. He wasn't the funniest king to me. Excuse me,
• 8:38
  Speaker 9: you're irrelevant in this conversation because irregardless as to how
• 8:42
  Speaker 9: you feel about me, there are people think that I'm
• 8:45
  Speaker 9: knocked down kill over funny. But more importantly, I own
• 8:49
  Speaker 9: the gift that God gave to me. I take ownership
• 8:53
  Speaker 9: of his blessing. Cause you don't think it's so. You
• 8:55
  Speaker 9: ain't taking that from me. Stop letting people steal your joy.
• 9:00
  Speaker 9: Stop letting people take what you're supposed to know. Look,
• 9:04
  Speaker 9: I'm a I'm a kind person at heart. Man, you
• 9:08
  Speaker 9: ain't nothing. Now you sit in here going. Man, I
• 9:10
  Speaker 9: guess I ain't what's.
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: Your tripping for?
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: You are a kind person, own that, take ownership of it.
• 9:18
  Speaker 9: Stop letting things God has given you be taken away
• 9:22
  Speaker 9: from others. The devil is a cold player, and he
• 9:25
  Speaker 9: got cold players working for him, just shaking, just taking
• 9:28
  Speaker 9: stuff from you. You know, I'm a hard worker. I
• 9:31
  Speaker 9: really am intelligent. You stupid man. I thought I was
• 9:35
  Speaker 9: a hard worker.
• 9:35
  Speaker 8: Man.
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: They came in here and said I was stupid. Man,
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: I don't know what I'm doing wrong. What excuse me?
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: You're a very bright person. Hey, y'all take ownership.
• 9:45
  Speaker 9: When God gives you something, blesses you with a gift,
• 9:47
  Speaker 9: a talent, a skill set, a mindset.
• 9:51
  Speaker 8: Own it.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: Don't let people come in here and take it from you. Man, Okay,
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: I probably shouldn't have went. Its morning show.
• 10:02
  Speaker 9: Ladies and gentlemen, man, have your undivided attention.
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: Please, thank you now put that down. Now, stop stop
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: all that.
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 10:12
  Speaker 9: Now that I have it, it's time for the Steve
• 10:15
  Speaker 9: Harvey Morning Show. Wait man, hold on one second. I
• 10:19
  Speaker 9: said no, it's time for the Steve Harvey Morning Show. Welcome, everybody,
• 10:27
  Speaker 9: Welcome one, Welcome all. We are here hold on y'all
• 10:31
  Speaker 9: one second.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: Man ain't gonna tell you.
• 10:36
  Speaker 9: I said no, damn ladies and gentlemen, This is the
• 10:42
  Speaker 9: Steve Harvey Morning Show, and this is how we chose
• 10:45
  Speaker 9: to do it.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: This morning, the creator of reality radio. And it don't
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: get no more. Really, what hold on? Why I get
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: off his damn radio?
• 11:02
  Speaker 10: You just wait?
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Steve Harvey Morning Show. Shirley Strawberry. Hey,
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: good morning, Steve. What's going on over there? Ain't nothing
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: happening right here. We're just being real with it, you know,
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: calling for real, I.
• 11:15
  Speaker 11: Mean, keeping it real. What's going on, Steve?
• 11:18
  Speaker 9: Going nephew, Tommy yea, yay. I'm in the building top
• 11:28
  Speaker 9: top to Anthony Brown.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: What up, mister Hobby? What's going on?
• 11:32
  Speaker 12: Man?
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: What is happening?
• 11:34
  Speaker 8: Hey?
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: Nothing man? Everybody goody.
• 11:40
  Speaker 6: Oh.
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: I'm in good shape, man, real good shape. Happy, bless?
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: I wonder apple?
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: So wait? Did you just say happy? Yeah? Happy?
• 11:52
  Speaker 9: Ecstatic? Listen to me, over joy. The key is I'm
• 11:57
  Speaker 9: not finna lett. Nobody steal my joy? You know what
• 12:02
  Speaker 9: I'm saying?
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the joy thieves out there, the joy thieves are
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: out there.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: They still enjoy.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: It was your damn joy in a minute.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: Man, boy, you know what's amazing to me.
• 12:18
  Speaker 9: It's like amazing that people people who think they can
• 12:23
  Speaker 9: do something to you, like it's just gonna be free,
• 12:27
  Speaker 9: you know, like that I'm gonna just do what I
• 12:29
  Speaker 9: want to do to them, and it's just gonna be free.
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: Well, I'm here to tell you it ain't free. You're
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: gonna have to.
• 12:40
  Speaker 13: Pay free costs and there's been gassed to go get it,
• 12:50
  Speaker 13: I mean, don't deliver free.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: You're right, it's like it's almost like conversation.
• 13:02
  Speaker 12: Listening real carefully, but if you listened real closely, it's
• 13:06
  Speaker 12: real stupid.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah what yeah say what now?
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: Shining Well, I'm suner happy, Steve, Oh good, I'm glad
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: for that.
• 13:20
  Speaker 9: Myself always good and a good weekend place some golf
• 13:24
  Speaker 9: this weekend lay pretty good.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: But you know it's just once a couple of them
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: swings should be going, what the hell did I do?
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: Hell did?
• 13:37
  Speaker 8: All right?
• 13:37
  Speaker 12: Coming up in thirty two minutes after the hour, run
• 13:40
  Speaker 12: that brank back with the Nephew.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: Right after this. You're listening.
• 13:45
  Speaker 12: Morning show, all right, and it's time now to start
• 13:47
  Speaker 12: your morning off with the nephew and run that brank
• 13:49
  Speaker 12: back what you got for nept Can I.
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: Have your kidney?
• 13:56
  Speaker 4: Hello?
• 13:56
  Speaker 14: Hello, I'm trying to reach your brother Conny. How you doing, bro?
• 14:02
  Speaker 14: This is Deacon Patterson, call him from the church. How
• 14:04
  Speaker 14: you doing today?
• 14:05
  Speaker 4: Uh, Deacon Patterson?
• 14:06
  Speaker 8: Yeah?
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: Just doing finding yourself.
• 14:08
  Speaker 14: Sir, I'm doing good, doing good. You know the church
• 14:11
  Speaker 14: is behind you on what you're going through. When we
• 14:13
  Speaker 14: were praying for you, man, we know all about the
• 14:15
  Speaker 14: you know you're going in the surgery on Friday to
• 14:18
  Speaker 14: get your get your painkers removed. So I wanted to
• 14:21
  Speaker 14: give you a call, man, have a word of prayer
• 14:23
  Speaker 14: and let you know that we all are pulling for you,
• 14:25
  Speaker 14: and we know that that the man upstairs are gonna
• 14:28
  Speaker 14: pull you through this success.
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: Will God blessing keep you? Uh that Deacon, God blessing
• 14:33
  Speaker 4: keep you? Because I tell you I'm going through something here.
• 14:35
  Speaker 4: Me and my wife we been talking about it and
• 14:37
  Speaker 4: we've been praying on it, and it sure's a wonderful
• 14:40
  Speaker 4: pain to know that your church is with you and
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: and y'all thinking about me in prayer. I really had
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: to take this this to the Lord. This is a
• 14:47
  Speaker 4: serious thing with me and I ain't never had an
• 14:50
  Speaker 4: operation before in my life, and I know I need it.
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: My wife have made it clear, the doctor and made
• 14:55
  Speaker 4: it clear, and I believe I'm ready to go forward
• 14:57
  Speaker 4: with Deacon and we're gonna give the victory to who
• 14:59
  Speaker 4: the Yes, sir, he's the victory.
• 15:03
  Speaker 8: He let me.
• 15:04
  Speaker 14: Let me have a word of proud with your brother
• 15:06
  Speaker 14: con If you don't mind, just buy your head from me.
• 15:08
  Speaker 14: Father God, we ask right now, we ask right now
• 15:11
  Speaker 14: that you touch brother Conley as he goes in on Friday,
• 15:14
  Speaker 14: please put your hands on him. We ask Father, that
• 15:17
  Speaker 14: you hold on to the doctor that's getting ready to
• 15:20
  Speaker 14: go and put surgery on.
• 15:22
  Speaker 8: Yes.
• 15:22
  Speaker 4: We asked that you make sure that the doctor he's
• 15:26
  Speaker 4: got a.
• 15:27
  Speaker 14: Strong eye on that morning walk with him.
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: We asked that that that he got a steady hand
• 15:32
  Speaker 4: when he got the scoppel in his hand.
• 15:34
  Speaker 14: We asked that you hold on to him please as
• 15:37
  Speaker 14: it goes in through a surgeon, because we know comes
• 15:40
  Speaker 14: side in the morning the victory going belong to brother
• 15:44
  Speaker 14: Conley and the.
• 15:44
  Speaker 4: Lord, Thank you Lord.
• 15:45
  Speaker 8: We know all of this.
• 15:46
  Speaker 14: But we we asked that you take that painterers and
• 15:49
  Speaker 14: you remove it out successly, close him back up like
• 15:52
  Speaker 14: it will never been into the end. Before walk with me.
• 15:55
  Speaker 4: That's what we're asking. We ask your Lord at the
• 15:57
  Speaker 4: same time that they're removing this pan kreous Lord, we
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: asked that you reach around his backside, and we asked
• 16:04
  Speaker 4: that you touch his kidney. Lord, touch his kidney and
• 16:08
  Speaker 4: make it whole, make it a one hundred and ten percent.
• 16:10
  Speaker 4: We want you to make that that kidney like it's
• 16:13
  Speaker 4: been next bath kidney. He was Acon, Deacon, that's deacon
• 16:17
  Speaker 4: Deacon woop past Deacon passion. Yes, you know you're saying
• 16:20
  Speaker 4: they dun sir, there, there's nothing wrong with my kidney. Deacon,
• 16:23
  Speaker 4: I'm doing I'm doing fine. The Lordest Lordest then made it. Well,
• 16:26
  Speaker 4: he's gonna work on my package. That's what the doctors
• 16:29
  Speaker 4: operating though. They don't trap me forward, and that's what
• 16:31
  Speaker 4: they plan to remove. So really, my kidney is fine.
• 16:34
  Speaker 4: They did what they called it when they me in
• 16:35
  Speaker 4: my eyes, and everything else is fine. He ain't working
• 16:38
  Speaker 4: on nothing but my pantreas, sir.
• 16:40
  Speaker 14: Right right, right, Well, let me say I'm glad you
• 16:42
  Speaker 14: brought it up. This This wouldn't reason why I call you,
• 16:45
  Speaker 14: uh huh uh, of course I did call the prey
• 16:48
  Speaker 14: for you. Yes, you know because I want to make
• 16:50
  Speaker 14: sure that that that that you make it through this successfully.
• 16:52
  Speaker 14: But what another dred reason why I getting around it
• 16:54
  Speaker 14: is him?
• 16:55
  Speaker 10: Is uh?
• 16:56
  Speaker 14: Uh what I want to ask you? And I know
• 16:58
  Speaker 14: we we you know we've never met face to face.
• 17:00
  Speaker 14: I've seen you a couple of times, like I said,
• 17:02
  Speaker 14: the church, but you've been out most time. Uh, or
• 17:04
  Speaker 14: you're with your sickness and whatnot. But now, what what
• 17:07
  Speaker 14: I was gonna ask you was, yeah, and I know
• 17:11
  Speaker 14: this is I hate to come at you in the
• 17:13
  Speaker 14: final hour and you're getting ready to go have certain
• 17:14
  Speaker 14: and all that, but if you don't mind it, if
• 17:18
  Speaker 14: you could see it in your heart to see to
• 17:21
  Speaker 14: do something for somebody else, yes, uh, that's that's the
• 17:24
  Speaker 14: last will. You're always supposed to have those who right right,
• 17:28
  Speaker 14: And I'm glad you you think like that. Now when
• 17:31
  Speaker 14: they go in on Friday morning and and remove that
• 17:34
  Speaker 14: paincre is out, do you think that that that that
• 17:39
  Speaker 14: they could go in and get one of your kidneys?
• 17:42
  Speaker 4: Because I need one hold hold on just what.
• 17:48
  Speaker 10: You say, see see see what else.
• 17:50
  Speaker 14: I've been going through myself with a little helmet and
• 17:53
  Speaker 14: I'm wondering if if if I need a kitteny, and
• 17:56
  Speaker 14: I'm wondering if you can give me one of yours.
• 17:58
  Speaker 14: When they go in and get your paint, they go
• 18:00
  Speaker 14: already have your open.
• 18:01
  Speaker 4: Did you say you wanted them to take one of
• 18:03
  Speaker 4: my kidneys?
• 18:04
  Speaker 14: Yeah, and give it to me because I need one.
• 18:07
  Speaker 4: You need a kidney? Yes, But what I mean you
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: already gonna be laying there open. Wait a minute, mister,
• 18:12
  Speaker 4: you need a kidney. I need help with my pastors.
• 18:14
  Speaker 4: You gonna call me with some fat that man, this
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: ain't no work of the Lord. Now you said you
• 18:19
  Speaker 4: a dickon, Like I said, dickon patters of my name.
• 18:22
  Speaker 14: But see what I'm asking you is what me?
• 18:26
  Speaker 10: Man?
• 18:26
  Speaker 14: Brother Conny, what harm is it? If you already open
• 18:29
  Speaker 14: and laying on the table.
• 18:30
  Speaker 4: Oh, you ain't hearing a damn thing I said?
• 18:32
  Speaker 9: Have you?
• 18:33
  Speaker 4: I said, I'll be man, you're crazy as hell. Now
• 18:36
  Speaker 4: what I'm gonna have to do. I'm gonna need to
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: call the pastor because here's a going on here. You
• 18:41
  Speaker 4: say you knew you mad the damn new mister. Matter
• 18:44
  Speaker 4: of fact, you too damn new to know who you're
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: talking to. What I'm saying is you have two two?
• 18:49
  Speaker 4: Look like you said you say they did the MRI.
• 18:50
  Speaker 4: I God, they don't give up what I said they did. Man,
• 18:53
  Speaker 4: I got two kidneys. You got to one of your advantage.
• 18:56
  Speaker 4: That's your problem. Mister. Let me tell you something. I'm
• 18:58
  Speaker 4: trying to get well and you calling with this. You
• 19:01
  Speaker 4: say you a new Vickers, You damn show is and
• 19:04
  Speaker 4: you won't be at that church loan. I'll tell you
• 19:06
  Speaker 4: that because if I ever get cold to your sister,
• 19:08
  Speaker 4: we got some rink me to do. What is it
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: gonna hurt for you to give me one of them kitteningers?
• 19:12
  Speaker 4: If both of them, if both of them kittens is good,
• 19:14
  Speaker 4: ain't gonna hur them? Think you you ain't getting my kitteney, man,
• 19:17
  Speaker 4: ain't go a hud? What's wrong with you? Say?
• 19:20
  Speaker 11: Man?
• 19:20
  Speaker 14: All I'm saying is, if you're gonna be opening laying
• 19:22
  Speaker 14: on the table.
• 19:23
  Speaker 4: What is it gonna hurt? I don't got me wond
• 19:25
  Speaker 4: now you gonna tell him? Am mope me laying on
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: the damn table? What kind of a pull you in
• 19:29
  Speaker 4: charge of? Mister? Let me tell you something I was.
• 19:32
  Speaker 4: I need to meet you before I get to the hospital,
• 19:34
  Speaker 4: and nobody can help. They got that damn bad getting
• 19:36
  Speaker 4: in yours, and I can tell you that we die,
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: you won't feel a damn thing I got that. I'll
• 19:41
  Speaker 4: be damned if you're gonna call and talk me out
• 19:43
  Speaker 4: of one of my damn kitteness. Man, I'm trying to
• 19:45
  Speaker 4: live just like you, trying to let me know it.
• 19:48
  Speaker 4: Take care of me, because what you talking about I
• 19:49
  Speaker 4: ain't got a damn thing to do with Jesus. You
• 19:51
  Speaker 4: can catch my and get off my phone, that's what
• 19:54
  Speaker 4: you can do. Can I say one more thing to you?
• 19:56
  Speaker 4: What as you listen to me?
• 19:58
  Speaker 6: Man?
• 19:59
  Speaker 4: How to listen to you? And you ain't talking about
• 20:01
  Speaker 4: nothing that's got nothing to do with what's going on
• 20:03
  Speaker 4: with me? Mister, you're running a game. If I could
• 20:06
  Speaker 4: get to y'all, put.
• 20:07
  Speaker 14: Land in you what you're not?
• 20:09
  Speaker 4: Just say one more thing and then I'm gonna let
• 20:10
  Speaker 4: you go. Is you're listening for what?
• 20:13
  Speaker 14: That's just left you timing from the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
• 20:17
  Speaker 14: You just got thanked by your daughter.
• 20:20
  Speaker 8: Oh Lord, have.
• 20:22
  Speaker 4: That girl, Lord have mercy, Lord, have much Jesus and
• 20:27
  Speaker 4: you all right? Brother cordless man, you have made me
• 20:30
  Speaker 4: use language that I swear I don't know nobody I
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: heard my neighbors nam.
• 20:33
  Speaker 14: Using that I and stopped a long time ago talking
• 20:36
  Speaker 14: that away. Please forgive me, Lord, help brother con. I
• 20:39
  Speaker 14: gotta ask you one more thing, man, What is the
• 20:42
  Speaker 14: baddest I'm talking about the baddest radio show in the land.
• 20:46
  Speaker 14: It's gotta be y'all here. I don't even remember the.
• 20:48
  Speaker 4: Name of it now, Steve Harvey, MA, Steve Harvey Morning Show.
• 20:52
  Speaker 4: Lord help us. I ain't gonna forget it now.
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: That's it. You're listening morning shows.
• 21:00
  Speaker 12: Time. Now for ask the CLO with our chief love officer.
• 21:04
  Speaker 12: He knows all about love, Steve Harvey.
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: Here we go. This is from Jan and Pittsburgh.
• 21:10
  Speaker 12: Jan writes, I am a busty, thirty seven year old
• 21:13
  Speaker 12: single female dating a fifty five year old man, and
• 21:17
  Speaker 12: he keeps commenting about the size of my breast, as
• 21:21
  Speaker 12: if that's the only reason he's with me. When he drives,
• 21:25
  Speaker 12: his left hand is on my chest.
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: In left hand, he didn't reach cross. They're in England,
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: but she said Pittsburgh, so I don't know.
• 21:35
  Speaker 12: If we're sitting alone he's caressing my chest while we talk.
• 21:40
  Speaker 12: I don't feel like he's even paying attention to me.
• 21:42
  Speaker 12: How do I figure out if it's me or my
• 21:45
  Speaker 12: large breast that he likes.
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: Well, it's all three of y'all. I mean, you know
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: what is trying to figure out?
• 21:52
  Speaker 8: You know?
• 21:53
  Speaker 9: Look, you know, I mean you know is y'all you
• 21:58
  Speaker 9: know it ain't just you. Stop separating your self like
• 22:00
  Speaker 9: you not connected to him. Stop stop stop acting like
• 22:05
  Speaker 9: you don't know where they come from, you don't know
• 22:07
  Speaker 9: whose they are. Nothing like this. Stop acting like it's
• 22:10
  Speaker 9: two separate issues. He is infatuated with all three of y'all.
• 22:16
  Speaker 9: Now listen to me. The first thing you said was
• 22:20
  Speaker 9: I am a busty. Well, that's first thing you said.
• 22:24
  Speaker 9: Then you come talking about that's all he talked about
• 22:26
  Speaker 9: that what you The first thing.
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: You mentioned, you didn't say to us.
• 22:30
  Speaker 9: You was lovely, a wonderful conversationalist, intelligent, you know, fun, caring,
• 22:37
  Speaker 9: loving to be around.
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: Your description of yourself was I'm a busty. Femail. I
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: haven't heard the term busty in quite some time.
• 22:48
  Speaker 9: Yea. So now when he driving, he got one hand
• 22:55
  Speaker 9: on yo boy, when y'all talking, he just touching them.
• 23:01
  Speaker 9: Now listen to me, but I mean I understand that,
• 23:04
  Speaker 9: you know, and really and we got people on this
• 23:08
  Speaker 9: show who's had this happened to them? And y'all must
• 23:12
  Speaker 9: y'all know y'all have Shirley and Carlin. Y'all know y'all
• 23:16
  Speaker 9: have had this happen to you. Don't act brand new
• 23:20
  Speaker 9: because day.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: Eight it's a brand new year. How many times have
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: you slapped your husband? Boys? Stop? We're moving on. That's
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: what I thought, Yes, Lizelle, what does you trip in? Folks?
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: We're moving on?
• 23:39
  Speaker 12: Carlo Lizelle and Startbridge says, I paid two hundred and
• 23:44
  Speaker 12: seventy three dollars to get my aunt out of jail.
• 23:47
  Speaker 12: She got into a big fight with her boyfriend and
• 23:50
  Speaker 12: he called the police. She was mad because I picked
• 23:53
  Speaker 12: him up from work and she accused us of messing around.
• 23:57
  Speaker 12: Backstory is he and I have been friends and since
• 24:00
  Speaker 12: we were eighteen, and she has a problem with it.
• 24:03
  Speaker 12: She told me she isn't paying me back and how
• 24:06
  Speaker 12: do I get my money without beating her tail?
• 24:09
  Speaker 9: Well, let me ask you a question. Where y'all live
• 24:13
  Speaker 9: where you can get out of jail for two hundred seventy.
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: Come on, come on, I've heard of that type dog Temmy.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: I'm stuck. I'm just trying to figure out seventy three.
• 24:24
  Speaker 9: The parking tickets costs more than that. If you speed
• 24:28
  Speaker 9: in a school zone, it's two fifty. You can whoop
• 24:32
  Speaker 9: somebody ass. Police department come pick you up or rest you.
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: Drive you down there? Shall you put you in.
• 24:39
  Speaker 9: Some garments, give you a meal, dush you with the lie,
• 24:42
  Speaker 9: and now you can get out of that for two
• 24:44
  Speaker 9: hundred and seventy three dollars?
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: What county is your ass in? People asked, we'll start
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: whipping for two dolls. Look, and the name is a giveaway,
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: the Zeil. Where in the Deep South.
• 25:04
  Speaker 9: Is your ass can get arrested and get out two
• 25:08
  Speaker 9: hundred and seventy three dollars. What is the processing feet
• 25:14
  Speaker 9: at Chelle County Jail? No, y'all's jail got to be
• 25:19
  Speaker 9: connected to the mail's office. City Hall in the jail
• 25:22
  Speaker 9: is the same building. This is just the damn this
• 25:27
  Speaker 9: thing I've ever heard. I don't know how you gonna
• 25:29
  Speaker 9: get your money back?
• 25:30
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I don't know.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: I don't know what to tell you. Go ahead, shere
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: the next question, Missy.
• 25:34
  Speaker 12: We're moving on, Missy, and Phoenix says, I'm a forty
• 25:37
  Speaker 12: nine year old married woman and I need to know
• 25:39
  Speaker 12: if my husband is cheating on me. I saw his
• 25:42
  Speaker 12: stebit card transactions and he spent money at Bath and
• 25:45
  Speaker 12: body Works and Forever twenty one. I asked him why
• 25:48
  Speaker 12: he was in those stores, and he said he would
• 25:50
  Speaker 12: have to report those purchases as fraud. He went so
• 25:54
  Speaker 12: far as to cancel his depth card and request a
• 25:56
  Speaker 12: new one. I think it's all a cover up.
• 25:58
  Speaker 9: See a liar and hell no, hell no, he is
• 26:02
  Speaker 9: what he was supposed to do. I want to take clap, clap,
• 26:06
  Speaker 9: hands off to your homie. Cancel the debit card reported
• 26:10
  Speaker 9: as thefth something that hell is going on? Yes, sir, perfect,
• 26:16
  Speaker 9: hell no, he isn't a liar. No, no, because and
• 26:22
  Speaker 9: I'm gonna tell you why, because y'all forty nine fifty
• 26:27
  Speaker 9: year old men don't even know what Forever twenty one is.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: I promise you he don't.
• 26:36
  Speaker 9: And Bath and Bodyworks said, that ain't a combination of
• 26:40
  Speaker 9: what we buy for a lover. That ain't that ain't
• 26:45
  Speaker 9: a mistress purchase. We don't buy bath and bodywork products.
• 26:50
  Speaker 9: We don't buy products like that for mistresses.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: What do they buy?
• 26:56
  Speaker 8: Men?
• 26:56
  Speaker 11: Like?
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: What's going on?
• 26:59
  Speaker 9: To the so you know we're talking, listen to me.
• 27:04
  Speaker 9: This lingerie is big. Airplane tickets is big. Hotels is big.
• 27:11
  Speaker 9: Spa treatments as big.
• 27:14
  Speaker 8: Uh.
• 27:15
  Speaker 9: These are gifts that you buy, you know, stuff uh uh,
• 27:19
  Speaker 9: Gym memberships, you know, stuff that has a lasting effect
• 27:23
  Speaker 9: that you can benefit from as the man.
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: Yes, rent is huge and I'm not mad at that.
• 27:33
  Speaker 15: You know, now, how does how is he supposed to
• 27:37
  Speaker 15: pay for this? So this card situation, this.
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: To never go on a card.
• 27:45
  Speaker 9: Everchase this is immediately go down and get your ass
• 27:50
  Speaker 9: a cash withdraw and do all cash purchases and hand
• 27:56
  Speaker 9: deliver all of this.
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: Don't don't no paper trail. So reason out of a
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: not a joint account. Then to look at the money too?
• 28:08
  Speaker 9: Well, see even if it's a joint account, you got
• 28:10
  Speaker 9: to take the cash out. What did you do with
• 28:13
  Speaker 9: the cash? I spent it?
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: One? Let me ask you this how how upset was
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: he when excuse me say it again because he was
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: talking to say it again?
• 28:24
  Speaker 12: Okay, I'm saying, I'm asking you how upset was the
• 28:27
  Speaker 12: husband when he learned that it was fraud on his card?
• 28:32
  Speaker 8: Yes?
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: I want to hear that.
• 28:34
  Speaker 6: What wow?
• 28:35
  Speaker 9: Hell no, not my car. You know I've been hearing
• 28:39
  Speaker 9: about this right here. Hold on, what's the number, baby, baby?
• 28:42
  Speaker 9: What is the number to the bank? Who the hell
• 28:46
  Speaker 9: got what is forget.
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: Your twenty one? It's one? Why just forget your twenty one?
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: It's forever twenty one? Thank you to see you're listening
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: Morning show. All right? Jay is here.
• 29:07
  Speaker 12: Yes, he wrote another book. You said it was a
• 29:09
  Speaker 12: twenty eighth one, Steve.
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: Probably.
• 29:15
  Speaker 13: This book is really home hitting and everybody can relate
• 29:19
  Speaker 13: to this. The name of this book is called if
• 29:21
  Speaker 13: You're the only one in the house working, damn it.
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: These are the rules.
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: That's the name of the book.
• 29:27
  Speaker 13: Okay, if you don't, if you're the only one in
• 29:31
  Speaker 13: the house working, you can change the channel. Don't matter
• 29:35
  Speaker 13: what nobody else is watching. If they say I'm watching that,
• 29:40
  Speaker 13: you can say I'm paying for that, so you can
• 29:43
  Speaker 13: change the damn jump.
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, a great feeling.
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: I'm the only one in the house working. My new book.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: Chapter this is chapter thirteen. You only only you. Since
• 29:54
  Speaker 2: you're working, only you get to use the good towels.
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: You don't have a job.
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: You use them up ass towns the value behind them
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: with Okay.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm the only one, the one with the holes
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: in it.
• 30:07
  Speaker 9: But those are the ones, you ragging ass, tie the
• 30:11
  Speaker 9: ones we keep under the sink.
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: Then where your towels at?
• 30:15
  Speaker 13: Yes, that's where your towels and minor fluffy, soft and
• 30:19
  Speaker 13: naked turtle lie, salt and tidy bowl.
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: And two extra rolls of toilet Love it you love it?
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: Love it?
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: Go ahead.
• 30:28
  Speaker 13: If you're the only one working in the house, you
• 30:31
  Speaker 13: set the curfew as to when people can come in.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: I may or may not give you a key, Okay,
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: I may or may not.
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: Damn if you have a clock, all these jones is locked.
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: That's what I'm seve read. I'm not getting up. Yeah,
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: I'm better ask you no doughbells than.
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: You did those lock at twelve. Matter of fact, soon
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: as the news go off, I'm going to lock up.
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: I'm going to bed. Thank you.
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: Here's another chapter. This is a lung chapter.
• 31:02
  Speaker 13: If you have if I allow you to have a pet,
• 31:05
  Speaker 13: I don't need to see him. I don't need to
• 31:08
  Speaker 13: hear him, and I don't need to smell him, Okay,
• 31:11
  Speaker 13: I don't. I need to know that that pet is
• 31:13
  Speaker 13: not in the damn house. Well, your ass is down
• 31:16
  Speaker 13: to fish, thank you.
• 31:18
  Speaker 9: They're gonna be coming here with no damn burny rabbits,
• 31:21
  Speaker 9: thank you, cat you dogs say erbos.
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be watching nothing run around on no wheel.
• 31:30
  Speaker 13: You can have a fish and his ass got to
• 31:32
  Speaker 13: be in the corner if I feel like you should
• 31:35
  Speaker 13: have a fish.
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: All this is very important that you spoke on Steve.
• 31:39
  Speaker 13: I will have my own and I'm gonna count the
• 31:43
  Speaker 13: little sections my very own roll of tillet paper that
• 31:47
  Speaker 13: will not be touched. Okay, my role, my damn it,
• 31:54
  Speaker 13: that's my roleroom into the bathroom and back with me.
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: Thank you if I don't touch Yeah, what what I'm counting? Squaesh?
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: What them ragged ass tiles is fault?
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: Use them? Rake them out and dry them out and
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: hang them up.
• 32:17
  Speaker 12: Yeah, rancher, So Jay, this isn't all in your new book,
• 32:22
  Speaker 12: my brand new book work.
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: I'm the only one working in this house. These are
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: the rules, damn it.
• 32:26
  Speaker 8: Number one.
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: Here's another chapter of this chapter sixteen.
• 32:30
  Speaker 13: If I allow you to have a side hustle in
• 32:33
  Speaker 13: that house, meaning you're doing hair, you're doing hell, you
• 32:38
  Speaker 13: ain't sitting on a personal trainer.
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: I get a cut and.
• 32:41
  Speaker 16: Expressly if you sell it weed, fit.
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: It fit half whatever?
• 32:55
  Speaker 9: Yeah, over a halfstock had hey j had Yeah, I
• 33:00
  Speaker 9: like chapter number or thirty two?
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: Oh which what I like that?
• 33:04
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: But the name of this chapter is because I said.
• 33:07
  Speaker 9: So, uh huh, it's a good chapter's like your because
• 33:11
  Speaker 9: I said so, anybody ask a question in this damn house? Right,
• 33:18
  Speaker 9: refer to chapter thirty two, damn it because I said said.
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: So, that's it. That's book.
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: It's another another chapter, chapter chapter forty. This is a
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: good chapter.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: Seve how many chapters in the book.
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: Oh oh, this is a big book.
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: Talking about about one hundred and eighteen forty.
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: It says if I go to bed early, I go
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: to bed early. Everybody goes to bed early that yeah, yeah, no, no, no, no,
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: we all go to bed at this. I don't have
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: to be in the bed hearing you up. Look what
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: you up for?
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: What the night person?
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: You ain't got to go to go to bed. You
• 34:07
  Speaker 2: go to bed, Okay, going there.
• 34:10
  Speaker 9: Walk to but the TVs go off? Yes, no, no,
• 34:16
  Speaker 9: I'm gonna let you do your last one. But man,
• 34:18
  Speaker 9: I want to thank you for chapter sixty four six.
• 34:23
  Speaker 9: When I'm sitting on the tarlet, I like the door open,
• 34:29
  Speaker 9: Do not pull it shut.
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: You're kidding me. Right, you're kidding me, right, Chapter sixty four.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: I'm sitting on the tarlet. I like the door open.
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: You're not in my house, walk past and pull it shut.
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: I'm shutting house. Now, you're not shutting nothing.
• 34:50
  Speaker 15: I'm shutting the dough if you're in there using the
• 34:52
  Speaker 15: bathroom with door your.
• 34:55
  Speaker 8: Chap.
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: No, you won't, you won't.
• 35:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're not.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: This is you don't pay for the show.
• 35:08
  Speaker 13: When I wake up in the morning to go to work,
• 35:11
  Speaker 13: I can make as much damn noise.
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: As I want to make. Don't say a damn thing.
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: Don't be sing me.
• 35:24
  Speaker 8: Now.
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: What you need to do is get some work. Now,
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: that's what you need to do. But you can't get
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: out of this house because you ain't got nowhere else
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: to go.
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: Mister Tom Now when you wake up, no, hell, don't know.
• 35:35
  Speaker 12: Ain't keeping good Jay's new book if you're the only
• 35:38
  Speaker 12: one working in the house.
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: Uh this heavy? You're listening hard morning show.
• 35:50
  Speaker 12: All right, guys, it's time to play around of would
• 35:52
  Speaker 12: you rather here we go? Would you rather get away
• 35:57
  Speaker 12: with any lie you tell, any you tell you can
• 36:00
  Speaker 12: get away with it?
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: Or would you rather Hey, my whole life goal right there, baby,
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: I don't know what I won't a go ahead? Or
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: this is for you junior? Or would you rather detect
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: any lie you hear?
• 36:21
  Speaker 8: So?
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: Would you rather be able to get away with one
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: or be able to tell lying? We need them?
• 36:27
  Speaker 7: Yeah?
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: A all day? But don't you care if someone is
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: lying to you? I would lie back. Just two liars talking.
• 36:42
  Speaker 17: That's a good conversation to waven what elball we should
• 36:46
  Speaker 17: do that one day, we should lie to each other
• 36:48
  Speaker 17: on a coke.
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: Just the whole damn thing. I just want to be
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: all mind.
• 36:53
  Speaker 9: Be believable, Yeah, be my whole gold in life anyway, man, Lord,
• 36:57
  Speaker 9: thank you Jesus.
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: To say this and she finn to believe it.
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: Yes, she's afraid of lighting you too.
• 37:05
  Speaker 9: I don't hear the damn I've been lying to before.
• 37:08
  Speaker 9: I can handle it, y'all. One can't handle.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: I want the truth. I want to know the truth now.
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: I want what sound good? I love you? I love
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: you too, Thank you, baby, see you tomorrow.
• 37:20
  Speaker 9: Okay, can't wait, Okay, Lie, ain't no problem, problem, Lie,
• 37:25
  Speaker 9: ain't no problem lie to me?
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Oh my god. Oh you're the best out of head,
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: Thank you, baby, best out of head? Too? Cool? Great, line. Yeah, yeah,
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: I love it, I tell you the same way.
• 37:40
  Speaker 15: Absolutely.
• 37:40
  Speaker 17: Let me tell you why, surely because me and his
• 37:42
  Speaker 17: research department ain't good at all. We ain't researching nothing
• 37:45
  Speaker 17: to find out it's the truth.
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: No, it ain't be truth. We don't care now, okay, whatever?
• 37:53
  Speaker 12: All right, Well here's another one. Would you rather never
• 37:56
  Speaker 12: pay for taxes? We never pay for gas?
• 38:00
  Speaker 9: You were gonna say that, Yeah, yeah, I'm about the
• 38:03
  Speaker 9: hell out this gas? Hey, hey, hey, I don't give
• 38:08
  Speaker 9: a damn of gas? Is thirty dollars a gallon? If
• 38:11
  Speaker 9: I could just get out of a.
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: All right?
• 38:17
  Speaker 12: Would you rather be a star of a small movie
• 38:20
  Speaker 12: or be an extra and a really big movie like
• 38:23
  Speaker 12: Top Gun, Maverick or something?
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: No damn extra walking around?
• 38:26
  Speaker 18: Ain't got no hey, hey stop gun we talk.
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: I'll be of a small ass line.
• 38:38
  Speaker 12: You're on the floor, you're part all right? One last one?
• 38:41
  Speaker 12: If we have time. Would you rather German chocolate cake.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: Or cherry Hey? O, lord, cherry pie?
• 38:49
  Speaker 9: Because you know why, because it's hard to find a
• 38:51
  Speaker 9: good cherry pash, Because I know that's what you make.
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: Anybody's sliding my dim or somewhere on?
• 39:00
  Speaker 2: What are you saying?
• 39:01
  Speaker 14: All right?
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: All right, that's today's rounded.
• 39:04
  Speaker 12: Would you rather coming up more of the Steve Harvey
• 39:06
  Speaker 12: Morning Show right after this?
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show.
• 39:12
  Speaker 12: Let's have some fun, guys, come on time to play
• 39:15
  Speaker 12: Who on the show would you trust?
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: All right, Carla has a list of questions for us.
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: Let's go Carla, all right, Chirley, guys, here we go.
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: Who would you trust?
• 39:26
  Speaker 8: So?
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: Who on the show would you trust to bail you
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: out of jail? Anybody where the money resides?
• 39:34
  Speaker 15: Yeah, he ain't gonna answer that phone when they called. Now,
• 39:41
  Speaker 15: let me tell you that that one call you got,
• 39:43
  Speaker 15: You're not he not tacking that up.
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna call somebody else tell them right.
• 39:50
  Speaker 11: So same question for you, Steve, who would you call
• 39:53
  Speaker 11: on this show to bail you out of jail?
• 39:58
  Speaker 15: You got to do a blow, got a huff because
• 40:02
  Speaker 15: because in his mind, ain't none of us.
• 40:04
  Speaker 9: Got no money? Well, oh, y'all got enough money to
• 40:08
  Speaker 9: get me out. But who would pick up the phone
• 40:10
  Speaker 9: and act?
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: First? Monica wasna get through to be on the internet
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: because she'll want to post it on her igh.
• 40:21
  Speaker 11: G Hey, all right, here's another question. Who on this
• 40:30
  Speaker 11: show would you trust to protect you from an intruder.
• 40:43
  Speaker 11: Let's go Tommy, anybody.
• 40:46
  Speaker 9: Okay, So you can't pick yourself, you can't, well, of
• 40:50
  Speaker 9: course me. But I picked Tommy because he's hot headed.
• 40:53
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he's gonna do something. He's gonna spring in action,
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: gonna be a problem, Tommy. We all picked Thomas.
• 41:02
  Speaker 6: All right.
• 41:04
  Speaker 11: Who on this show would you trust to keep all
• 41:08
  Speaker 11: of your Vegas secrets?
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: Definitely not Monica, not the Mouth of the South. I
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: picked sure Yeah, you gamble, you don't drink.
• 41:26
  Speaker 9: Shirley, Yeah, yeah, because carl ain't gonna go down, because
• 41:33
  Speaker 9: because she haled Colt.
• 41:42
  Speaker 6: Okay, all right?
• 41:44
  Speaker 11: Who on this show would you trust to be kind
• 41:49
  Speaker 11: to your family if you died?
• 41:59
  Speaker 8: Yeah?
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: Everybody would be kind to the family. Okay, good, so everybody?
• 42:03
  Speaker 3: All right?
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: So who on this show would you trust to perform
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: c p R when you that have to be?
• 42:12
  Speaker 8: You are?
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: Shirley? You Sureley?
• 42:17
  Speaker 8: A Monica?
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: My father, he's other to Right now, I can't I
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: can't have them on these two. I can't wake up
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: in Jay over me blowing out and staying still y
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: standing on me with just give me an ambulance. Listen,
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: how get that? But he saved your lot.
• 42:37
  Speaker 9: I can hold my breath that long. Hell, I took
• 42:39
  Speaker 9: a shot, little brain damage. I've I'll recover some therapy.
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: At least when I wake up.
• 42:45
  Speaker 6: Your life.
• 42:48
  Speaker 15: Here, at least when I wake up switch places with him.
• 42:51
  Speaker 15: Don't let me see him over me, least on y'all.
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: Okay, that's crazy.
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: All right, here we go.
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: This is a good one right here.
• 43:00
  Speaker 11: Who on the show would you trust to keep your
• 43:04
  Speaker 11: sex tape from falling into the wrong hands?
• 43:09
  Speaker 10: God?
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: Well, well, first of all, look who had the biggest reaction.
• 43:21
  Speaker 9: That means there's a possibility to dance a tape out
• 43:24
  Speaker 9: there somewhere.
• 43:25
  Speaker 14: They don't.
• 43:25
  Speaker 8: They don't.
• 43:26
  Speaker 1: They don't.
• 43:27
  Speaker 15: They don't play v HS is no more. They don't
• 43:29
  Speaker 15: have no more VHS.
• 43:32
  Speaker 3: We got ggital baby.
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: All right, look at the time we gotta say, Junior,
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: I say ju coming up baxt On, not Carla or me?
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: Okay I Carla. Y'all are looking at it.
• 43:50
  Speaker 9: Hell now, y'all, y'all are sending to the wise, you know, not.
• 43:57
  Speaker 6: For free.
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: Up next to the nephew with today's prank phone call.
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: Right after this, you're listening Hard Morning Show coming up.
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: At about four minutes after the hour.
• 44:10
  Speaker 12: It's my strawberry letter for today, and the subject is
• 44:13
  Speaker 12: there's something he needs to know. All right, we'll find
• 44:16
  Speaker 12: out what that's all a bit about and see if
• 44:19
  Speaker 12: she'll tell him in a bit. But right now it
• 44:21
  Speaker 12: is time for the nephew and today's prank phone call.
• 44:24
  Speaker 12: What you got for his neph you know, I got
• 44:26
  Speaker 12: something for you?
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: And and calling I got some for y'all?
• 44:30
  Speaker 8: What is it?
• 44:30
  Speaker 14: What is it?
• 44:32
  Speaker 15: This is the church calendar, Sureley, you would be what
• 44:38
  Speaker 15: July you know on the calendar.
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: Pula, uh, my birthday month. That's what you're doing it
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: on October?
• 44:46
  Speaker 4: Is that what you do?
• 44:46
  Speaker 15: That's it right there? You would be you would be
• 44:48
  Speaker 15: in October, you understand. And uh you know, uh, you
• 44:53
  Speaker 15: know this ain't with no robes on. That this ain't
• 44:56
  Speaker 15: with no robes on. Just lett, y'all know, is just
• 44:59
  Speaker 15: a shot.
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: And I like the church. You're saying, we ain't.
• 45:10
  Speaker 15: Doing his shot? Yeah, yeah, okay, church calling. But let's
• 45:17
  Speaker 15: go cat though, y'all know what the hell y'all what
• 45:20
  Speaker 15: I'm talking about here?
• 45:22
  Speaker 8: Come on?
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: Kay too much?
• 45:26
  Speaker 10: Hello?
• 45:26
  Speaker 8: Hello, I'm trying to reach sister Allison.
• 45:29
  Speaker 10: Allison, Alison, She's not here, Man, she had work as
• 45:32
  Speaker 10: a speaker.
• 45:33
  Speaker 8: Hey, this is this is brother Lester, brother lefty. How
• 45:36
  Speaker 8: you doing today?
• 45:37
  Speaker 10: All right Lester, brother Lester right from the church. Okay, okay,
• 45:41
  Speaker 10: oh but my right, right right right?
• 45:43
  Speaker 8: You're a husband right with Jared. I'm sure? Yeah. This
• 45:46
  Speaker 8: is Gerald. Yeah, okay, okay, I met you a couple
• 45:48
  Speaker 8: of times, Jery Wayne seen you in a minute though. Man,
• 45:50
  Speaker 8: I've been working on Sundays and I said it. I
• 45:52
  Speaker 8: was gonna try to make it, but I told her,
• 45:53
  Speaker 8: you know, I want to get involved. You know this
• 45:55
  Speaker 8: year it's gonna be a better year. I'm gonna get involved.
• 45:58
  Speaker 14: Man.
• 45:58
  Speaker 8: Well, come on down, man. We we love you, that's
• 46:00
  Speaker 8: for sure. Man. Can I give you a number when
• 46:02
  Speaker 8: she can call me back? Well?
• 46:03
  Speaker 10: Okay, yeah, sure?
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: Is this about?
• 46:06
  Speaker 8: You know, let's send us something. What's going on? Actually
• 46:09
  Speaker 8: the single ministry? Man, I'm over the Single Ministry and
• 46:12
  Speaker 8: we're raising some money. So we're actually putting together a
• 46:16
  Speaker 8: calendar and we wanted her to give us a call
• 46:19
  Speaker 8: about it. Okay, so let me let me get let
• 46:21
  Speaker 8: me give my number real quick. Wait a minute.
• 46:22
  Speaker 10: Okay, you say a calendar, So the church is doing
• 46:25
  Speaker 10: the calendar, But is it like the couples like we
• 46:27
  Speaker 10: come in like how it'd always be like the couples
• 46:29
  Speaker 10: come in and be like, this is mister and missus.
• 46:31
  Speaker 8: I mean a calendar. No, no, no, what we're doing
• 46:34
  Speaker 8: to see a lot of the guys got together. What
• 46:36
  Speaker 8: we're gonna do is a mount swimsuit calendar. And we're
• 46:40
  Speaker 8: gonna be trying to put that together. Man, So let
• 46:42
  Speaker 8: me give you my number, man, because I want to
• 46:44
  Speaker 8: call all the guys were saying, if she get on
• 46:46
  Speaker 8: the calendar, he'll probably get solid.
• 46:48
  Speaker 14: You know.
• 46:48
  Speaker 10: Wait a minute, wait a minute, whoa wo woar. Let's
• 46:51
  Speaker 10: slow down, Slow down, brother Lester, let's slow down. Okay,
• 46:55
  Speaker 10: a calendar, I swim suit calendar for the single ministry
• 46:59
  Speaker 10: at the church.
• 47:00
  Speaker 8: What it is? Gerald, were gonna be the first church
• 47:04
  Speaker 8: to who have ever done a swimsuit calendar? You see
• 47:07
  Speaker 8: what I'm saying.
• 47:08
  Speaker 10: No, wait a minute, Wait a minute, wait a minute.
• 47:11
  Speaker 10: You call it for us my wife to be in it.
• 47:14
  Speaker 10: And you sure you got the right number because where there?
• 47:17
  Speaker 8: I mean because your wife is Alison?
• 47:18
  Speaker 10: Right, yes, my wife is Alison. And first of all,
• 47:21
  Speaker 10: did what's this man about? All the guys y'all got
• 47:24
  Speaker 10: together y'all voted about Okay, I'm trying to take.
• 47:27
  Speaker 8: This slow man.
• 47:28
  Speaker 10: Oh God, hold my tongue right man, because I'm sure
• 47:31
  Speaker 10: I don't understand.
• 47:32
  Speaker 8: Where you're going with this. And listen, we're gonna get
• 47:34
  Speaker 8: sister Gidgery. She gonna be Miss March June is like
• 47:38
  Speaker 8: pretty much in the middle of the year, we want
• 47:40
  Speaker 8: your wife to be the big centerphold.
• 47:42
  Speaker 10: Please please tell me you're not tiring my house this
• 47:45
  Speaker 10: morning talking about my wife to be in a calendar,
• 47:48
  Speaker 10: a swimsuit calendar. But then on top of that, y'all
• 47:51
  Speaker 10: a'll got together, y'all voted that y'all want my wife
• 47:55
  Speaker 10: to be in a swim to calendar fay Church.
• 47:59
  Speaker 8: Okay, well, well wait a man, I mean look at
• 48:01
  Speaker 8: this on the positive side, man, what this is? See,
• 48:04
  Speaker 8: like I said, we raising money for the Singles Ministry
• 48:06
  Speaker 8: and the Single Ministry and getting ready to go on
• 48:08
  Speaker 8: a big trip.
• 48:10
  Speaker 4: Got to do with the singles Ministry.
• 48:12
  Speaker 10: She's knowing it made I don't know the people that
• 48:14
  Speaker 10: said the single ministry, Why you telling talking about my
• 48:16
  Speaker 10: wife and busing something like this. You hold them that.
• 48:20
  Speaker 10: Oh Jesus help me.
• 48:21
  Speaker 8: Hey man, you you you should feel honored man, that
• 48:24
  Speaker 8: your wife is.
• 48:26
  Speaker 10: Looking at my wife like that. Man, we coming in
• 48:28
  Speaker 10: there and we try to get help and we try
• 48:30
  Speaker 10: to do it. Y'all looking at my wife's time, but
• 48:32
  Speaker 10: y'all want my wife to be in a swim suit contest. Man,
• 48:35
  Speaker 10: do you understand what that is?
• 48:36
  Speaker 8: Man?
• 48:36
  Speaker 10: They ain't number some pennies. Man, So y'all looked at
• 48:39
  Speaker 10: my wife time. Y'all want my wife to be hit a.
• 48:41
  Speaker 8: Pennies saying what you gotta understand? Chill this right? Him
• 48:43
  Speaker 8: means for the single ministry, which we got a big
• 48:46
  Speaker 8: trip coming up, so we raising money.
• 48:48
  Speaker 10: What do y'all doing? Man, it's not something you do
• 48:50
  Speaker 10: at the church?
• 48:51
  Speaker 11: Man.
• 48:52
  Speaker 10: You have car washes mad without man, we watched cars. Man,
• 48:56
  Speaker 10: y'all talking about Canada? Man, what are you doing it?
• 48:59
  Speaker 11: Man?
• 48:59
  Speaker 4: What type of your this is?
• 49:00
  Speaker 8: This?
• 49:00
  Speaker 10: Flip turning two? Man?
• 49:02
  Speaker 8: See Joel that the difference is on this whole thing. Man,
• 49:04
  Speaker 8: don't be upset about what it is that man, we
• 49:06
  Speaker 8: don't found something that ain't no other church done. Before
• 49:09
  Speaker 8: you see what I'm saying.
• 49:10
  Speaker 10: The reason ain't no other church done is because this
• 49:14
  Speaker 10: is wrong. Man. What committee got to get on something
• 49:17
  Speaker 10: like this? Man? What is wrong with you?
• 49:19
  Speaker 8: Hey, dog? You got to understand.
• 49:20
  Speaker 4: Listen.
• 49:21
  Speaker 8: We got sister Gidgrit, we got Sister Vickie.
• 49:23
  Speaker 10: Okay, said the things that signed out on this, You
• 49:27
  Speaker 10: got these women in the church and that they gonna
• 49:29
  Speaker 10: put on swim suits.
• 49:30
  Speaker 8: Well, what I'm saying, we got them on our list.
• 49:32
  Speaker 10: We got them on our list because I'm saying, ain't
• 49:34
  Speaker 10: nobody getting with you?
• 49:35
  Speaker 4: Man? What is wrong with you?
• 49:36
  Speaker 9: Man?
• 49:37
  Speaker 8: Hey man, listen, just to help us get start it.
• 49:39
  Speaker 8: Do you have a picture of Sister Alison in a swimsuit?
• 49:43
  Speaker 10: Look, man, I ain't giving you no picture of my wife,
• 49:45
  Speaker 10: but no swimsuit.
• 49:46
  Speaker 14: Man.
• 49:46
  Speaker 8: No, this is just something we're trying to do for
• 49:48
  Speaker 8: the ministry.
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: Dude.
• 49:49
  Speaker 10: You know what, are you at the church and you
• 49:51
  Speaker 10: work at the church full time part time? I'm at
• 49:53
  Speaker 10: the church, okay, are you there there?
• 49:56
  Speaker 8: Nah, I'm not there right now, but I'm gonna be
• 49:57
  Speaker 8: there for clours later on this evening.
• 50:00
  Speaker 10: Okay, what time do colid?
• 50:01
  Speaker 8: Rehearsal start left seven o'clock.
• 50:03
  Speaker 10: But while you, lester, what I want you to do
• 50:05
  Speaker 10: is for me before you go to rehearsal, can you
• 50:07
  Speaker 10: just be right in the front right quick? I just
• 50:09
  Speaker 10: want to we need to meet personally right quick, bless
• 50:12
  Speaker 10: me and you. So I'm gonna come to the rehearsal
• 50:15
  Speaker 10: and then let's talk about this face to face because
• 50:18
  Speaker 10: this over the phone and out and this is not
• 50:19
  Speaker 10: worth it right now, and I need to meet the
• 50:21
  Speaker 10: person that's calling my howel talking about my wife doing
• 50:26
  Speaker 10: all the cdiotic type. So let's meet right in the front. Brother,
• 50:30
  Speaker 10: First you go to sing. I got something for you
• 50:33
  Speaker 10: to sing, gay dooks. So meet me in the front, man,
• 50:37
  Speaker 10: please before you go in, Lester, because we ain't gonna
• 50:41
  Speaker 10: talk about this no more over the phone. Let's talk
• 50:43
  Speaker 10: about this in person.
• 50:44
  Speaker 8: Okay, First, I mean you gotta calm down. Man, Why
• 50:46
  Speaker 8: don't even understand why you already like you know what?
• 50:49
  Speaker 10: Yeah, I'm gonna come down, Lester.
• 50:52
  Speaker 8: Seven. So it started at seven.
• 50:53
  Speaker 10: Let's do six fifty five, Lester. I think this is
• 50:56
  Speaker 10: gonna work for us. This is gonna help your caller
• 50:59
  Speaker 10: to get out the wait that you really really needed
• 51:01
  Speaker 10: to get out. Man, I got something for you that's
• 51:04
  Speaker 10: gonna help just calls. Please be outside at six fifty five.
• 51:10
  Speaker 10: Please don't go on there.
• 51:11
  Speaker 8: I'm gonna be outside. Can you bring a picture with you.
• 51:14
  Speaker 10: Oh yeah, I got a picture for you. I got
• 51:16
  Speaker 10: a nice picture for you.
• 51:17
  Speaker 8: I'll tell you what. Me and Tommy will be outside
• 51:19
  Speaker 8: waiting on you when you get there. You and who
• 51:22
  Speaker 8: Me and nephew Tommy from the Steve Hobby Morning Show.
• 51:25
  Speaker 8: We're gonna be right outside in the front of the church.
• 51:29
  Speaker 8: Oh man, this man, Hey man, your brother Jason told
• 51:38
  Speaker 8: me the prank phone call you man, God, man, you
• 51:42
  Speaker 8: know you know what you said. Tell him, I said,
• 51:44
  Speaker 8: if that fool who came to church more often, he
• 51:46
  Speaker 8: would know that this is a prank phone. Come, oh dad,
• 51:51
  Speaker 8: I'm glad it is. Mann.
• 51:52
  Speaker 10: You just imagine how to draw up to that church acting.
• 51:54
  Speaker 8: The food ain't many? I got. I gotta ask you
• 51:58
  Speaker 8: this here, man, what is the baddest and I mean
• 52:01
  Speaker 8: the baddest radio show in the land?
• 52:04
  Speaker 10: Man, the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: Man, Now you have it, y'all.
• 52:10
  Speaker 15: Feel a little uncomfortable now with you y'all, don't man
• 52:12
  Speaker 15: being on telege?
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: What that's not the right word on your phone?
• 52:21
  Speaker 8: That's it?
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: What if I get y'all in some wet robes? How
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: about that? Oh God, you can't say what? Put them
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: in some wet robes.
• 52:31
  Speaker 15: What I hate you and your cat saying that just
• 52:36
  Speaker 15: home on the robe on you just just dripping wet
• 52:40
  Speaker 15: right there? What even like your church, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Not
• 52:48
  Speaker 15: only am I shooting my TV show Ready to Love
• 52:51
  Speaker 15: in your city, the City of Brotherly Love, but I'm
• 52:53
  Speaker 15: also telling them jokes. That's right, Helium Comedy Club. That
• 52:57
  Speaker 15: is July twenty sixth, twenty seven, twenty eight. The Nephew
• 52:59
  Speaker 15: is in town. Tickets and own sale right now now.
• 53:02
  Speaker 15: I said it, Ay, Shirly, it's on you.
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: Coming up next.
• 53:05
  Speaker 12: Strawberry Letter subject he stole my wife right from under me.
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: We'll get into it right after this.
• 53:12
  Speaker 12: You're listening Harvey Morning Show. Time now for today's Strawberry Letter.
• 53:18
  Speaker 12: And if you need advice on relationships, on sex, on work,
• 53:22
  Speaker 12: on parenting, on dating, and more. Please submit your Strawberry
• 53:26
  Speaker 12: letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter.
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: We'll do our best to help you.
• 53:32
  Speaker 12: We could be reading your letter live on the air,
• 53:35
  Speaker 12: just like we're going to read this one right here
• 53:38
  Speaker 12: right now.
• 53:40
  Speaker 15: Book Love, Hold on tight, we got a coin can
• 53:42
  Speaker 15: give it is strawbaby letter.
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: This letter makes me.
• 53:46
  Speaker 12: Sad right here subject he stole my wife from write
• 53:51
  Speaker 12: up under me. Okay, Dear Stephen Shirley, I am a
• 53:56
  Speaker 12: hard working, faithful man. I was married for fifteen years
• 54:00
  Speaker 12: to my college sweetheart. I never had any problems in
• 54:04
  Speaker 12: my marriage until I tried to help out a friend.
• 54:07
  Speaker 12: Here's what happened. My wife had a best friend and
• 54:10
  Speaker 12: the friend was married to a big time cheater. We
• 54:13
  Speaker 12: were always there for her if she was going through
• 54:15
  Speaker 12: drama with her husband. Their marriage finally ended when her
• 54:19
  Speaker 12: husband got her cousin pregnant. She put him out of
• 54:25
  Speaker 12: the house and he didn't have anywhere to go. So
• 54:29
  Speaker 12: I talked my wife into letting him stay with us
• 54:31
  Speaker 12: for a while so he could sort things out. The
• 54:35
  Speaker 12: first week he kept to himself, and he slept a
• 54:37
  Speaker 12: whole lot when he wasn't at work. The second week
• 54:41
  Speaker 12: he started talking more. I came home from work one
• 54:44
  Speaker 12: day and he and my wife had cooked together and
• 54:47
  Speaker 12: we all sat and ate. Going into the third week,
• 54:51
  Speaker 12: I sat down with him to see if he'd made
• 54:54
  Speaker 12: other living arrangements. He informed me that he was very
• 54:57
  Speaker 12: comfortable in my house, and he said my wife I
• 55:00
  Speaker 12: loved having him there. He told me that he could
• 55:03
  Speaker 12: tell my wife needed to be loved properly. So he
• 55:07
  Speaker 12: seduced her, and he's been making love to her almost
• 55:11
  Speaker 12: daily for the past two weeks.
• 55:14
  Speaker 1: You can guess what happened next.
• 55:16
  Speaker 12: I grabbed him and I slung him to the ground,
• 55:20
  Speaker 12: and my wife rushed in and yelled for me to stop.
• 55:24
  Speaker 12: She said it was all true, and she apologized to me.
• 55:27
  Speaker 12: Fast forward to the present. I have a new house.
• 55:30
  Speaker 12: He's in my old house with my wife and they
• 55:33
  Speaker 12: are getting married when our divorce is final. He took
• 55:37
  Speaker 12: my kindness for weakness and stole my wife from right
• 55:41
  Speaker 12: up under me. I still want to put Yeah, I
• 55:45
  Speaker 12: still want to put hands on him, but there's no
• 55:48
  Speaker 12: use in it because he already got my wife. It's
• 55:51
  Speaker 12: going to be hard for me to trust another female.
• 55:54
  Speaker 12: How could I move past this and find happiness again?
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: Wow? Now you see why this letter makes me sad.
• 56:00
  Speaker 12: This, I mean, just when you think you've heard it all,
• 56:05
  Speaker 12: I'm just really sorry because you sound like a truly
• 56:09
  Speaker 12: nice man. You sound like a nice guy. You know,
• 56:11
  Speaker 12: women ask all the time we're the nice guys. You
• 56:14
  Speaker 12: know there are no more nice guys. Well, this was
• 56:16
  Speaker 12: truly a nice guy. These weren't even your friends. These
• 56:20
  Speaker 12: were your wife's friends. She was your wife's best friend.
• 56:23
  Speaker 12: You weren't even come on, You stepped in to help
• 56:27
  Speaker 12: your wife's best friend's husband out. You didn't have to
• 56:30
  Speaker 12: do any of this. You didn't have to do it,
• 56:33
  Speaker 12: and I know you're probably asking yourself.
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: Why you did. Now, this loser and a man. I'm
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: being kind when I use that word. He stabbed you
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: in your back so hard.
• 56:44
  Speaker 12: Then he twisted that knife. Okay, but I can't blame
• 56:48
  Speaker 12: him entirely because your wife played.
• 56:50
  Speaker 1: A big role. What is wrong with her? What is
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: wrong with your wife?
• 56:55
  Speaker 12: You guys have been college sweethearts and been married for
• 56:58
  Speaker 12: fifteen years. So she lets this guy come in here,
• 57:02
  Speaker 12: and after two weeks, she's sleeping with the guy and
• 57:06
  Speaker 12: defending him, trying to pull you off him when he
• 57:10
  Speaker 12: clearly deserved a beat down. He was very comfortable in
• 57:15
  Speaker 12: not only living in your house, but you know, taking
• 57:18
  Speaker 12: liberties with your wife and everything else.
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: And now he's staying in your house. This is terrible.
• 57:24
  Speaker 12: I blame your wife for allowing this to go down,
• 57:28
  Speaker 12: but more than that, I blame him because you were
• 57:30
  Speaker 12: just showing kindness to another man who needed it at
• 57:33
  Speaker 12: the time. I think he overstayed. You allowed him to overstay.
• 57:36
  Speaker 12: Three weeks is too long. He should have gotten it
• 57:39
  Speaker 12: together by then, and if he didn't, he should have
• 57:41
  Speaker 12: moved on.
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: How do you move on?
• 57:44
  Speaker 12: One way is to hopefully, you know, get some female
• 57:48
  Speaker 12: companionship in your life. That's one way you can do it,
• 57:52
  Speaker 12: move forward and have happiness again. You say it's hard
• 57:54
  Speaker 12: for you to trust females. All females aren't like that.
• 57:57
  Speaker 12: I hope you know that, But you know, start slowly
• 57:59
  Speaker 12: with friendship from a female and take it from there.
• 58:03
  Speaker 12: You can move on and get past this. And you're
• 58:05
  Speaker 12: gonna have to try and forget Steve.
• 58:08
  Speaker 9: I don't see nothing about no moving on in this letter.
• 58:10
  Speaker 9: This is just about this letter. Yes, I don't see
• 58:14
  Speaker 9: them moving on.
• 58:14
  Speaker 8: Huh.
• 58:15
  Speaker 9: Started with my ass You married fifteen years to your
• 58:18
  Speaker 9: college sweetheart, got it. Never had problems in my marriage
• 58:21
  Speaker 9: till I tried to help out a friend. Definition of friend.
• 58:26
  Speaker 9: Here's what happened. My wife had a best friend. So
• 58:31
  Speaker 9: this is your wife's best friend and the friend was
• 58:33
  Speaker 9: married to a big time Cheatoh now, nowhere in this
• 58:37
  Speaker 9: letter really was you saying that this man was your friend,
• 58:43
  Speaker 9: your wife's best friend, and the friend was married to
• 58:47
  Speaker 9: a big time Cheaterah, we were always dare for her
• 58:50
  Speaker 9: when she was going through drama with her husband.
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: Y'all were always dare for her. You ain't mentioned this
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: guy yet.
• 58:59
  Speaker 9: Then the marriage five ended when her husband got her
• 59:02
  Speaker 9: cousin pregnant. Okay, understood. She put him out the house.
• 59:10
  Speaker 9: He didn't have nowhere to go. So then you talked
• 59:13
  Speaker 9: to your wife to let him stay with y'all for
• 59:15
  Speaker 9: a while. When'd he become your friend? But y'all was
• 59:18
  Speaker 9: with the lady to help her through all the trump
• 59:21
  Speaker 9: Then she put the man out. Now y'all take him
• 59:23
  Speaker 9: in too. What is y'all a shelter? You have to decide, dog,
• 59:29
  Speaker 9: you got a home or a damn shelter?
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: Now.
• 59:35
  Speaker 9: The first week he kept to himself, and he slept
• 59:38
  Speaker 9: a lot when he wasn't at work.
• 59:42
  Speaker 1: Then the second week he started talking about hit the
• 59:44
  Speaker 1: letter change.
• 59:44
  Speaker 9: I come home from work one day he and my
• 59:47
  Speaker 9: wife had cooked together, and we all sat down at
• 59:49
  Speaker 9: eight This wedding letter in for me.
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: Exactly this damn metal over cooking together fault.
• 59:57
  Speaker 12: Well, have part two of Steve's response coming up A
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 12: twenty three minutes to after be our subject of today's letter.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 12: He stole my wife from right up under me right
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 12: after this. You're listening Steve Hardy Morning Show. All right, Steve,
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 12: come on, Let's recap today's Strawberry letters subject. He stole
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 12: my wife right from under me, right from up under me.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 9: This letter unbelievable. You been married to college sweetheart. They
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 9: ain't have no problems. Her best friend had and her
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 9: friend her best friend her wife.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: Excuse me.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 9: His wife had a best friend who was married to
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 9: a big time cheetah. Then y'all was always theare for
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 9: going through the drama with her husband. Then the marriage
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 9: ended when her husband got her cousin pregnant.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: She put him out of the house.
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 9: He ain't have anywhere to go, so I talked my
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 9: wife and letting him stay with us so he could
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 9: sort things out. First week he had to himself, slept
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 9: a whole lot. Then he wasn't at work. The second
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 9: week he started talking more. I come home from work
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 9: one day he and my wife had cooked it together,
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 9: and we all sat down at eight cooking together for what.
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 1: Ain't nobody here but me?
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 9: You that are invited, and my wife Why is two
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 9: people cooking this damn meal? Three people don't require help
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 9: in the kitchen if your wife been cooking, it's just
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 9: a little bit extra for one more half a cup
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 9: more rice in the bowl uncooked. That blows up to
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 9: two damn cups of eight rice. Okay, now that's what
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 9: we start having a problem with right now. Now, going
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 9: into the third week, I sat down with the man
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 9: to see if he made other living arrangements. He informed
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 9: me that he was very comfortable in my house right there.
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 1: See, I don't know, I don't even.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 9: Know how we have in this conversation that nobody that
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 9: tell me, there's nobody that is no me we can
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 9: make this statement to me that I'm very comfortable in
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 9: your house. And he said my wife loved having him there. See,
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 9: I don't know nobody that really know me that can
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 9: open it, open their mouth and say these damn says.
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 9: This ain't disrespectful. This you who you think you talking to?
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: He told me he could tell my wife needed to
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: be loved property. Now, stunning stuff just.
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 9: Right there, because the dude that's writing this letter, it's
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 9: a little week ass dude. I'm sorry, man, this little
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 9: weeknds dude, because first of all, I can't write the
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 9: letter into the type because he had to send it
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 9: in an email. You can't email from jail, so I
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 9: couldn't even send this letter. See, there's no way I
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 9: can send this letter because my ass in jail. Dog,
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 9: what did you say to me? He told me he
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 9: could tell all my wife needed to be loved properly.
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 9: What so he seduced her and he's been making love
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 9: to her almost daily for the.
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 1: Past two weeks.
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 9: What old human can say these words to me and
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 9: I sit down and type it?
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 1: Dog, what don't I could tell your wife needed to
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 1: be loved properly.
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 12: That was it.
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 1: I could tell your wife needed to be loved. That's it.
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 1: That's it all after that has asked woman? All this hell.
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 9: First of all, you, my boy, you can tell my
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 9: wife needed to be loved properly. That's when I stand up.
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 9: I could tell your wife needs Okay. Then he said
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 9: he been making love to her for daily for the
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 9: past You then told me you screwed my word you
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 9: thought you could.
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 1: Say it, and then then then now this way, he
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 1: trying to sound like a man.
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 9: But I'm gonna tell you what. This didn't happen, y'all.
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 9: He just did it for life. Yeah, no, no, no, no,
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 9: he didn't do.
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 8: This right here.
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 1: You can guess what happened next. No, no, see next. No,
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 1: we can't no, I can't beat it out.
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 9: I grabbed him and slung him to the ground. That
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 9: ain't even how we fight. No, ain't first because I
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 9: grabbed him and slung him to the ground, and he
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 9: let you.
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 1: This is a dude that's bold enough to tell you
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 1: he slept with your wife.
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 9: I grabbed him and slunk him to the ground, and
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 9: my wife rushed in and yelled for me to stop.
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 1: She said it was all true, and she apologized to me.
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 1: What you don't know how.
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 9: Long it would have took her to get me on him.
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 9: Do you know how many police cars would have been
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 9: out side? He'd been all behind the refrigerator hiding. You know,
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 9: I'm trying to kill this dude.
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 15: Do you know?
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 9: Don't got the kitchen dog? Getting fast forward to the present.
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 9: She said it was all true, and she apologized to me.
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 9: Fast forward to the president. I have a new house.
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 9: He's in my old house with my wife, and they
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 9: are getting married when our divorce is final. What hey, dog,
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 9: you living, You living in my house, the one I'm
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 9: paying for. No man with her, No, no man, that's
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 9: not happening. This, none of this is happening. This is unthinkable.
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 9: He ain't no real man reading this letter going well,
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 9: you know, Steve, what could he do? We all because
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 9: we all sit in there going the question would.
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 1: Be, what didn't I do?
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 9: Damn set his house on fire and killed everybody in here.
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 9: We got yellow tape round the building, this chalk marks
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 9: on the ground. We he didn't heed the weapons. He
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 9: got DNA everywhere. The man ain't got no franking nails.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: Steve reedon. That's Steve in a coma and everybody else
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 1: in the damn coma. That's what what it happened. Do
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 1: you want to continue your response?
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 8: Yes, we do.
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: All right, we gotta take a break right here. Ever,
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: it's time I see.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 12: You can post your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter. It's
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 12: Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook. Check out the
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 12: Strawberry Letter podcast on demand now. Coming up at forty
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 12: six after the hour, We're gonna have part three of
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 12: Today's Strawberry Letters. Subject he stole my wife from right
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 12: up under me. We'll get back into it right after this,
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 12: you're listening.
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. Well, Steve, we were talking about this
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 1: strawberry letter.
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 12: You had a lot more to say on it subject
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 12: he stole my wife from right up under me and just.
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 1: Let it just a quick recap recap. Do we invite
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: this man over to the house He ended up sleeping
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 1: with his wife.
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 9: Told him I was could look at your wife until
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 9: she needed to be loved property.
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 1: I'm in sleeping with her every day for the past
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 1: two weeks. So you know what happened next. I grabbed
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 1: him and slung him to the ground. What hold on, dog,
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 1: Ain't nobody gets stabbed? Let's be waiting.
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 9: Ain't nobody were in the kitchen talking. You told me
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 9: you've been sleeping my wife for two weeks. Ain't nobody
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 9: gets stamped. Ain't nobody head split open with a frying pad.
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 1: Ain't nobody got face hand down on the on the
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 1: on the on the eye with the gas on it.
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 3: Everybody got all the ligaments.
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 2: I didn't.
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 1: I didn't reach behind the stove and snatch the gas
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 1: line out and stick it in your butt. Now you go,
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 1: now you talking?
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 15: Now?
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 1: I didn't slam your head in the freezer door nine times.
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 1: I ain't do that. I slung him to the ground.
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: I grabbed him and slung him to the ground, slung
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 1: him to the ground. So you don't believe it that
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 1: because that's not how you guys are.
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 9: You cannot tell no living man that that's married and
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 9: put in time with a wife and the dude sitting
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 9: in his house and say these words to him, and
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 9: his reaction is I grabbed him and slung him to
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 9: the ground. Then my wife yelled and yelled for me
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 9: to stop. So then he stopped so bad I can't
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 9: even hear her.
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, and she need.
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 9: To get out the way while I'm throwing these blows
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 9: an it down. Then he says, fast forward to the President.
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 9: I got a new house. So you moved out your house,
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 9: and there's a man that's moved in your house that's
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 9: screwing your wife in that house.
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 1: This house, ain't this house don't have no soot damage
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 1: from the fire you set.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 9: Yeah, you can actually live in this house. It ain't
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 9: no water damage when the fire department comes. But ain't
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 9: you ain't sitting No.
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 14: No.
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 1: Five. He's sleeping in the house screwing your wife.
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 9: You done went and got a new house, and they
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 9: getting married when our divorce and y'all ain't even divorced,
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 9: so now you're still paying for this house. That he
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 9: is't sleeping with your wife, Pardner, I'm gonna tell you
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 9: right now. And none of this is happening with no
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 9: dudes I know. Okay, one of my best friends, Biggie Wi,
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 9: if you sit in Big God and tell him you've
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 9: been sleeping with his wife. Man, this is not even
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 9: the news story.
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 1: We're on for eight out the greatest episode.
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 15: Everybody on that block that they house is in jail,
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 15: the whole block.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 1: All right, well, this is an episode of Forensic Files,
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 1: the Greatest Wonder we go. Guy, you're listening morning show?
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 12: All right, guys, it is time for comedy roulette Jay.
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 13: Please, It's very simple. We do that every week for
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 13: three subject put them on the wheel, wed stop. We'll
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 13: make it funny because we can do that. Watch it,
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 13: Watch it all right, watch it?
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 1: Think could you hear the subjects incoherent?
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 12: Things you say when you wake up and swear you
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 12: were not sleep Okay, Things people say when they get dumped,
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 12: Excuses people give when they can't chip in on the bill.
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: Those are subjects. We all know that I got your
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 1: fred Let's spendish funny. People stop.
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 12: Incoherent things you say when you wake up and swear
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 12: you weren't sleep.
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 1: Let's go what why?
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 2: Why is it duck driving volks Wagon? What's going on?
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 2: What's coming on?
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 1: Junior? Incoherent things you say when you wake up and
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 1: swear you weren't sleep.
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 3: I swear to God, I don't know, no, Tiffany, tim
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 3: what I said that?
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 12: Incoherent things you say when you wake up and swear
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 12: you were asleep, Tommy.
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 1: I wanted to pee right there.
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 15: I know what I'm doing. I wanted to pee right now. Okay,
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 15: I know what I'm doing. Okay, I pee what I
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 15: want to pee.
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 1: Okay, cleave me alone, Come on, Steve.
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 12: Incoherent things you say when you wake up and swear
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 12: you weren't asleep.
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 1: That that's because I wasn't at the fire.
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 12: Talking about we're playing comedy roulette. The subject is incoherent
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 12: things you say when you wake up and swear you
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 12: were asleep.
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 2: J Ginger, bread Man, jump in my face, since you
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 2: so bad?
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 1: Hey, you're in a deep sleep.
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 12: Incoherent things you say when you wake up and swear
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 12: you weren't asleep. O, Lord, you really thought about breast?
• 1:12:09
  Speaker 3: So Lord, you really you really thought about brest.
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 14: I like.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 1: And coherent things you say when you wake up and
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 1: swear you weren't asleep, nep you.
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 15: I'm watching that. Put it back on fantasy Island. I'm
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 15: watching that.
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 12: And comharing things you say when you wake up and
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 12: swear you weren't sleep, Steve Harvey.
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 1: I know Jesus was a carpenter.
• 1:12:41
  Speaker 14: I know that.
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 11: You can't come hairy things you say when you wake
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 11: up and swear you weren't sleep, Jake put your cat on.
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 2: The ceiling, saying, what the hell's going on?
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 10: The cat.
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 1: Sleep? Incoherent things you say when you wake up and
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 1: swear you weren't sleep.
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 3: Somebody turned stove off, anybody to cook it?
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 12: Incoherent things you say when you wake up and swear
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 12: you were asleep.
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 1: Tell me what you got we having sex? Or that,
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 1: oh you sleep? I'm trying. Incoherent things you say when
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: you wake up and swear you weren't sleep, Steve, who
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 1: are the white people?
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 6: Period?
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: He's actually done that before.
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 12: We was.
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 1: Comedy Roulette.
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 12: Incoherent things you say when you wake up and swear
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 12: you weren't sleep.
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 2: I got me a fig Newton pillow. Anybody seen it?
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: Wait, come on, Steve, close this one. I follow you.
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 3: I don't know what that's about. That's it.
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 6: I don't know what.
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 2: We'll have more.
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 12: That's comedy Roulette of the Steve Harvey Morning Show at
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 12: twenty minutes after right after this, you're listening hard Morning Show. Well,
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 12: we all know the internet is a wonderful place. It
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 12: allows you to find items that you absolutely do not
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 12: need but absolutely want.
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 8: Uh.
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 12: For instance, like a dog collar that will spit out
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 12: curse words every time your dog barks. You may not
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 12: you may not need that, but it might be a
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 12: want on your list. A company called Yes.
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 1: Company, Hey, hey, you damn right them home? Who's half
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 1: waiting the don that'd be funny to me.
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 12: A company steam called Mischief MSc HF has come up
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 12: with this idea and they're selling these collars for just
• 1:15:40
  Speaker 12: sixty dollars. The dog collar simply fastens around your dog's
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 12: neck and every time your dog barks, it shouts.
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 1: Out a curse word the.
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 2: The collars.
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 1: The company says, the collars sold out.
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 12: They're sold out already, but you can sign up for
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 12: details and how you too, or shipment will be ready.
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 1: Lore of this is Harvey Morning Show. Come here.
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 12: More of the Steve Harvey Morning Show coming up at
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 12: thirty three minutes after the hour. Right after this, you're
• 1:16:21
  Speaker 12: listening Harvey Morning Show. All right, guys, it's time to
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 12: play a round of would you rather here we go?
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 12: Would you rather get away with any lie you tell?
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 12: Any lie you tell you can get away with it?
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 1: Or would you rather hey, my whole life goal right there, baby,
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 1: I won't or this is for you, junior. Or would
• 1:16:51
  Speaker 1: you rather detect any lie you hear?
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 8: So?
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 1: Would you rather be able to get away with one?
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 1: Or be able to tell a lie? And we need them?
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 8: Yeah?
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 1: All day?
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 12: Lord, But don't you care if someone's lying to you?
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 1: I can call it. I will lie bad. I don't
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 1: give a damn. Just get two liars talking.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 3: That's a good conversation to it.
• 1:17:17
  Speaker 17: That waven what el ball let should do that one
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 17: day we should lie to each other on a coke.
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 9: Just the whole damn thing. I just want to be
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 9: all mine be believable. Yeah, it's been my whole goal
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 9: in life. Anyway, Landlord, thank you Jesus. I find to
• 1:17:34
  Speaker 9: say this and she fin to believe it. Yes, she's
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 9: great of lighting you too. I don't give a damn.
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 9: I've been lied to you before. I can handle it, y'all,
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 9: the one can't handle it.
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 1: I want the truth. I want to know the truth now.
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 1: I want what sound good? I love you?
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 9: I love you too, Thank you, baby, see you to morow. Okay,
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 9: can't wait, Okay, Lie, ain't no problem, problem, Lie, ain't
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 9: no problem.
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 4: Lie to me?
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 9: Yeah, Oh my god. Oh you're the best out of
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 9: a head, Thank you, baby, best out of head too?
• 1:18:05
  Speaker 1: Cool? Great line? Yeah, yeah, I love it up telling
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 1: you feel the same way. Absolutely, let me tell you why?
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 17: Surely because me and his research department ain't good at all.
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 17: We ain't researching nothing to find out it's the truth.
• 1:18:20
  Speaker 1: No, it ain't be true.
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 12: We don't care now, okay, all right, Well here's another one.
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 12: Would you rather never pay for taxes? We never pay
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 12: for gas?
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 1: Hey? You were gonna say that? Yeah, yeah, I'm about
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 1: the hell out this gas.
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 9: Hey. Hey, hey, I don't give a damn of gas?
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 9: Is thirty dollars a gallon? If I could just get
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 9: out of a.
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 7: All right?
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 12: Would you rather be a star of a small movie,
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 12: or be an extra in a really big movie like
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 12: Top Gun, Maverick or something.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 18: I'm extra walking around, ain't got no hey hey, but
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 18: it's stop good, we'll talk.
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 1: I'll be a small lass line.
• 1:19:12
  Speaker 12: You're on the floor, you're part all right? One last
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 12: one if we have time? Would you rather German chocolate cake.
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 1: Or cherry hey?
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 8: Hey?
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 1: Lord, cherry pie? Hey? Because you know why? Because it's
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 1: hard to find a good cheerry pie?
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 9: Oh, because I know that's what anybody's sliding my DMS
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 9: while on Are you all right?
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 14: All right?
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 1: That's today's rounded? Would you rather? Thanks?
• 1:19:39
  Speaker 4: Guys?
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 12: Coming up at forty nine minutes after the hour, our
• 1:19:42
  Speaker 12: last break of the day and some closing remarks from
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 12: the one and only Steve Harvey.
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 1: Right after this.
• 1:19:47
  Speaker 12: You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, Steve, here
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 12: we are our last break of the day.
• 1:19:53
  Speaker 1: It was a good day.
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 8: Yay, yay.
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 12: Yeah, And we're not going to take up any more time, Steve,
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 12: because people have been waiting for today's closing remarks.
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 9: Well, you know, it's really something that I was thinking about,
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 9: and it started with how I was assessing my own
• 1:20:11
  Speaker 9: life and then as I began to assess it. I
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 9: started thinking about of how many people's lives are running
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 9: a parallel course.
• 1:20:20
  Speaker 1: To mind.
• 1:20:21
  Speaker 9: I mean almost everybody. It really is almost the case
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 9: for everybody. If you're a person that's seeking happiness or success,
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 9: then you can relate to what I'm about to say
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 9: to you, because all of us, all of you, myself included,
• 1:20:40
  Speaker 9: have faced moments where it just didn't.
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 1: Go the way we planned.
• 1:20:45
  Speaker 9: It just didn't go the way we thought, and it
• 1:20:48
  Speaker 9: show didn't go the way we had hoped, but it
• 1:20:52
  Speaker 9: went anyway. And it happened to me this year. Well
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 9: last year, it happened to me in twenty nineteen. A
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 9: couple of things happened that I well, I had been forewarned.
• 1:21:05
  Speaker 1: Of it, but I just I didn't know it really
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 1: and then it happened.
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 9: But like I've always said to you, all life is
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 9: a ten percent what happens to years ninety percent what
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 9: you do about it. So as I had these doors
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 9: closed in my face and I began to pray about
• 1:21:24
  Speaker 9: it and talk to God about it, I also found
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 9: myself being privy to what the haters were saying, and
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 9: what the Internet was saying, and what so called friends
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 9: of mine will go.
• 1:21:41
  Speaker 1: Man, you all right, Man, your show gone. You alright,
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 1: You're gonna be okay. Man.
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 9: They say they took that in a little big shot.
• 1:21:49
  Speaker 9: They say, Man, it's over. Man, you man, you man,
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 9: You're gonna be all right through all this. Here, here's
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 9: what I realized, and I want to share with you.
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 9: And you can run your life, and I'm sure you
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 9: can relate to what I'm saying. Those people who were
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 9: writing me off, those people who have written you off,
• 1:22:12
  Speaker 9: those people who say you're finished, those people who think
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 9: there's no way you can.
• 1:22:18
  Speaker 1: Rise from this one. They got to know this, that
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 1: this that we are living is a movie.
• 1:22:32
  Speaker 9: And the thing about a movie it has a beginning,
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 9: it has a middle, and it has an end. But
• 1:22:38
  Speaker 9: this movie called life that we are in, the only
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 9: end to this movie is when our life is over.
• 1:22:47
  Speaker 9: Until our life is over, the movie is constantly being constructed.
• 1:22:53
  Speaker 1: Now here's the beautiful thing about this movie.
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 8: We end.
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 2: This movie.
• 1:23:00
  Speaker 9: Has only one writer. The script writer to this movie
• 1:23:06
  Speaker 9: is God. He is the one who controls the script
• 1:23:10
  Speaker 9: to your life.
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 1: But here is the catch to it.
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 9: You are the director. See, the director makes choices in
• 1:23:19
  Speaker 9: the movie. The director decides what's the move, what's the tone,
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 9: what's the flavor? How we're doing this, what's our motivation?
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 9: When we're talking to the actors, we give them the
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 9: motivation for it. Well, if you got a director that
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 9: wants to give you the positive information, which you are,
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 9: the director of the movie, what the script says, the pitfalls,
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 9: the trials and the tribulations in the movie. What the
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 9: script says. It's okay, it's just the ten percent that's
• 1:23:49
  Speaker 9: happening to you. It's you got to do to ninety percent.
• 1:23:52
  Speaker 9: You got to keep doing the movie. Because God is
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 9: the architect and the author of this movie. Nobody else.
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 9: The haters are merely movie critics. All their job is
• 1:24:04
  Speaker 9: to do is one thing, find something to criticize about
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 9: the movie. They don't even mention the good part of
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 9: the movie. They ain't there for you when you win
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 9: in in the movie. They not down for you when
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 9: things go well in your movie.
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 1: They are there for.
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 9: One reason only to criticize. They are the movie critics.
• 1:24:24
  Speaker 9: How else would they have a position if they wasn't
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 9: the critic, what would they do? The critics job is
• 1:24:29
  Speaker 9: to criticize, find something wrong. They not the movie helpers.
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 9: They not the movie go getters. They the movie critics.
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 9: That's all the hater is. And they don't even write
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 9: the good stuff. You got to keep doing the movie.
• 1:24:45
  Speaker 9: My Heavenly Father, your God is the writer of this movie,
• 1:24:50
  Speaker 9: and in this movie, that gonna be some Ebvan flowes.
• 1:24:53
  Speaker 9: You gotta beginning, you gotta middle. All you got to
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 9: do is keep doing the movie. You're the director. You
• 1:24:59
  Speaker 9: have the choice. When you blow a scene, all you
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 9: got to do is get with the writer, come up
• 1:25:05
  Speaker 9: with the next script, rewrite the next scene. You can
• 1:25:10
  Speaker 9: actually pray to the creator, who is the architect and
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 9: the writer of this movie just called your life. You
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 9: can either pray and get direction. You can pray and
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 9: get consultation. You can pray against guidance, and you know
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 9: how to direct the scene for the next one. Even
• 1:25:30
  Speaker 9: if you blow a scene, it ain't over All you
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 9: got to do is keep watching the movie. Keep in mind, now,
• 1:25:39
  Speaker 9: movie critics only have one job, that is to criticize.
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 1: But what they got to do, and what they gonna
• 1:25:45
  Speaker 1: end up doing is what everybody else gonna be doing.
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 10: Y'all.
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 1: They gonna keep watching the movie.
• 1:25:50
  Speaker 9: You're gonna show up somewhere else in another scene and
• 1:25:53
  Speaker 9: what they gonna say?
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 1: Then all they get church mouse quiet? Then don't they?
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 9: The critics of your movie get real quiet when you
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 9: shine it, when God raise you up and show you
• 1:26:04
  Speaker 9: out again. Where the critics at? Then I ain't no,
• 1:26:07
  Speaker 9: Oh Lord, they church mouse quiet. Then you got to.
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 1: Keep watching the movie because the movie ain't over.
• 1:26:14
  Speaker 9: Man. The writer of this movie is your heavenly father
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 9: and you are the director. Don't worry about them critics. Man,
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 9: keep watching the movie. You might mess around in the
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 9: next scene. You're looking real good.
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 1: I know I have.
• 1:26:32
  Speaker 12: For all Steve Harvey contests, no purchase necessary, void were prohibited.
• 1:26:36
  Speaker 12: Participants must be legal US residents at least eighteen years old,
• 1:26:39
  Speaker 12: unless otherwise stated. For complete contest rules, visit Steve Harvey
• 1:26:43
  Speaker 12: FM dot com. You're listening shoot Steve Harvey Morning Show