Latest / Mentor365 Services, Inc. / Breaking the Pattern: How to Stop Repeating the Same Relationship Mistakes

Transcript

Breaking the Pattern: How to Stop Repeating the Same Relationship Mistakes · Mentor365 Services, Inc.

• 0:00
  Hi everyone, this is Dina from Mentor365. Welcome.
• 0:05
  The topic for today is on why do certain relationship patterns keep repeating?
• 0:10
  Well, that's the question we ask most of the time, right? Ask ourselves about that.
• 0:18
  So maybe the question comes from after disappointment, heartbreak,
• 0:23
  or another relationship that did not turn out the way they hoped.
• 0:27
  The question is, why do I keep ending up in similar situation?
• 0:33
  Maybe the faces change, but the feelings seem familiar.
• 0:38
  Maybe different people come into your life, but somehow the same challenges continue to appear.
• 0:44
  Maybe you have wondered if you
• 0:46
  are doing something wrong or if you ever experienced something different.
• 0:52
  If you ever felt that way, I want you to know that you're not alone.
• 0:57
  One of the most important parts of healing is learning to recognize the patterns.
• 1:02
  Not so we can blame ourselves but so we can grow with wisdom.
• 1:07
  There's a big difference between blaming yourself and becoming more self-aware,
• 1:13
  self-blames you can say like everything is my fault but then self-awareness
• 1:19
  would say what can i learn from this experience right,
• 1:23
  so those are two very different conversations every relationship teaches us
• 1:28
  something some relationships teach us what love feels like.
• 1:32
  Some teach us what respect looks like. Some teach us patience.
• 1:37
  Some teach us forgiveness.
• 1:39
  And some teach us what we will never accept again.
• 1:43
  None of those lessons are wasted.
• 1:45
  As we grow emotionally, we become to notice that certain patterns repeat,
• 1:50
  not because we deserve pain, but because we are still learning what healthy
• 1:55
  relationships look like.
• 1:57
  Sometimes we overlook warning signs because we want to believe the best in people.
• 2:03
  Sometimes we ignore our intuition because we fear disappointing someone.
• 2:09
  Sometimes we stay longer than we should because we hope things will change.
• 2:14
  Hope is a beautiful quality, but hope should never replace wisdom.
• 2:19
  One of the greatest gifts healing give us is discernment. Discernment helps us slow down.
• 2:26
  It reminds us that we don't have to rush every friendship, every opportunity, or every relationship.
• 2:33
  Healthy relationships are built all over time. Trust grows through consistency.
• 2:39
  Respect grows through action. Character is revealed through choices, right?
• 2:45
  So when we move too quickly, we sometimes miss the opportunity to truly know someone's character.
• 2:52
  Healing teaches us to observe before we attach, to listen before we assume,
• 2:58
  to pay attention instead of making excuses.
• 3:01
  And it's not about becoming fearful. It's about becoming wise.
• 3:06
  Another important lesson is understanding the difference between potential and reality.
• 3:12
  Many people fall in love with who they hope someone will become instead of paying
• 3:17
  attention to who that person is today.
• 3:21
  We have all done it in one way or the other, right?
• 3:26
  We have imagined conversation. We have picture of future.
• 3:30
  We have believed that enough love could change another person but healthy relationships
• 3:35
  are built on reality not imagination but.
• 3:39
  Love is powerful. Encouragement is powerful.
• 3:43
  Prayer is powerful. But each person is responsible with their own choices and their own growth.
• 3:50
  You cannot do someone else's healing for them, and you were never meant to carry that responsibility.
• 3:57
  Faith also teaches us something beautiful.
• 4:01
  It reminds us that God often protects us in ways we don't immediately understand.
• 4:07
  Sometimes a closed door is protection. Sometimes an unanswered prayer is direction.
• 4:14
  Sometimes a relationship ending is making room for something healthier.
• 4:19
  In those moments, it can be difficult to understand.
• 4:23
  We ask why did this happen? But later, we often look back and realize we were
• 4:30
  being guided through something better.
• 4:33
  Healing also changes what feels familiar. Before healing, chaos may have felt
• 4:40
  normal because it was all you knew.
• 4:43
  After healing, peace begins to feel familiar instead.
• 4:47
  You start appreciating consistency, you value honesty, you respect kindness.
• 4:54
  So you become less interested in excitement that creates confusion and more
• 4:59
  interested in the relationship that create security. That is growth.
• 5:05
  One of the healthiest questions you can begin asking yourself is not why do I keep attracting this.
• 5:12
  Instead, ask yourself, what qualities do I want to build my life around?
• 5:18
  Do I value honesty? Do I value respect? Do I value consistency?
• 5:23
  Do I value faith? Do I value kindness? When you become clear about your values,
• 5:29
  your decisions begin to reflect them.
• 5:32
  You stop making choices based only on chemistry, you start making choices based on character.
• 5:39
  And a character always lasts longer than first impression.
• 5:43
  As you continue healing forward, remember that every experience is an opportunity to grow in wisdom.
• 5:51
  Don't allow disappointment to make your heart hard, okay?
• 5:58
  Allow it to make your discouragement stronger.
• 6:01
  Don't allow your heartbreak to convince you that healthy relationships don't exist.
• 6:07
  Allow it to remind you that healthy relationships are worth waiting for.
• 6:12
  Don't lose hope, grow in wisdom, grow in patience, and grow in faith.
• 6:18
  Because every healthy decision you make today is helping shape the relationship
• 6:23
  you will experience tomorrow.
• 6:25
  You are not defined by your past relationship. You are not trapped in old patterns forever.
• 6:31
  You are growing, you are learning, you are becoming wiser with every season.
• 6:36
  And as you continue becoming the healthiest version of yourself,
• 6:40
  you will also become better equipped to recognize relationships that reflect
• 6:45
  the same values you are building within yourself.
• 6:50
  Trust the process, trust your growth, trust God's timing, and never believing
• 6:56
  that healthy respect and genuine relationships are possible.
• 7:01
  Because they are, and you deserve relationship built on honesty,
• 7:05
  respect, kindness, and peace.
• 7:08
  Thank you for spending this time with me today. Until next time,
• 7:11
  continue healing forward, one relationship, one lesson, one faithful step at
• 7:16
  a time. Take care and God bless.