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April Fools Day, Trapped In The Bathroom, Comedy Roulette, Steve's Cohabitation Rules and more. · The Steve Harvey Morning Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Today show is pre recorded.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: Y'all know what time y'all don't know y'all after all,
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: given the.
• 0:15
  Speaker 3: Black bus busy.
• 0:24
  Speaker 4: Listening to me to show I don't joy, Yeah, joy,
• 0:59
  Speaker 4: you know you.
• 1:06
  Speaker 5: Love?
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: You got turn. I can.
• 1:41
  Speaker 4: To turn the mouth turn you probably got to turn
• 1:44
  Speaker 4: the mouth out, turn the water the mon.
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: Look, come come out you I sure will.
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: Good morning everybody. You are listening to the voice, Come
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: on dig me now one and only. Uh huh Steve
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: Harby Man got a radio show.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: M heah, I do.
• 2:15
  Speaker 6: Man.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: God been so good to me over the years, in
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: spite of all the mistakes I've made, in spite of
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: all the dirt I've done to myself. I'm talking about
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: went in knowing I was wrong. His grace and mercy
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: has forgiven me for all of my sins. God can
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: forgive you of all of your sins, everything you've done.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: God can forgive you. He can wipe your slate clean.
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: Now that might you might have some you know, things
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: you got to deal with because of some of your actions.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: Understand that, but you can wipe your slates. You can
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: wipe your slate clean with God and start again. You
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: can repent. God has mercy and grace. You could be
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: forgiven by God. Now people, that's another story. Some people
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: may never forgive you for you've heard them, or or
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: maybe they accusing you of doing something else. But you
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: know they may never forgive you. But God, God is
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: in the redemption business man. God will forgive you for
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: every sin you've ever committed. But you gotta want forgiveness now.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: And then you got to come correct because what you
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: can't do is you can't shoot him the crap. Now,
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: you can say that conversation with him. You know, whatever
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: you told your lawyer, whatever you told the victims, whatever
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: you told, whatever the story is you got going, if
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: it ain't the truth, you can say that with God,
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: because please know, he know, and he know your heart.
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: He know if you're trying to.
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: Manipulate somebody just for the system, if you're trying to
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: say this just so you can get out, He know
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: all of that. So if you're planning on shucking him
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: and driving him, save your brain before you wind up
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: digging yourself in a deeper hole. Just let me give
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: you that piece of advice. Because he ain't nothing to
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: play with. He's too great to be played with. And
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: so with that in mind.
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: I want to share some positive stuff with you this morning.
• 4:13
  Speaker 7: Man.
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: I want to say this. I want to remind you
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: not to let your circumstance and your situations dictate your
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: future or your results. I'm gonna say this again. This
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: is important information.
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: Man.
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: Don't let your circumstance and situations dictate your future or
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: your results. Do you know that in order to get
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: a different future or some different results, you control that
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: entire situation. It is you, It is your thoughts that
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: control the entire situation. It is how you look at
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: the situation that will determine how the situation is for you. See,
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: the same situation can be totally different for two different people,
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: because you can say you look at the examples of history,
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: just just look look in your neighborhood. How can There
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: was a book that a guy wrote one time who
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: had the name. He had a name, and he did
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: some research and he found a god that grew up
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: at the same age in the same neighborhood as him,
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: with the exact same name. He went on to become
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: a corporate CEO.
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: The other man was.
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: An inmate, and they had the same name, grew up
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: in this same neighborhood. They were both brothers, you know not,
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: I'm just saying brothers men. And they grew and they
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: went to Because how can two different two people the
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: same situation and the results.
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: Turn out so different.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: It is because of the thought process of one was
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: completely different from the thought process of the other.
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: You control it.
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: You don't have to let your circumstances and your situations
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: dictate your future or your results. Here's the way it works.
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: This is so you can understand this. Your mind is
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: the controlling factor of your thoughts. Your thoughts are the
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: controlling factor of your outcome. The Bible says a man
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: is as he thinketh. Please don't short play this scripture here,
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: because this one is the real deal. This is the
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: basis of every self improvement book you'll ever read. It's
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: already written in the Bible. The Bible has all the
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: information you need. But in case you need a little
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: bit of clarity in some simple modern day language, then
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: they have self improvement books.
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: They are all based on Biblical scripture. A man is
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: as he thinketh.
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: That's why Norman Vincent Peelee wrote the book The Power
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: of Positive Thinking. That's why a book came out called
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: the Magic of Thinking big. That's why a book came
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: out called Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon.
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: Heell all of you.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: All these titles that I've read that have mattered in
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: my life the most, These three major books that I've read,
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: they all say one thing. Think, thinking thoughts, because that's
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: what controls the outcome. Your brain works one of two ways.
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: It works positive or negative. It works good, which is
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: under the column of positive, or to work evil, which
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: is under the column of negative. It will have faith,
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: which is under the column of positive. Or you will
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: operate in fear, which is in the column of negative.
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: That is the only way your mind works.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: Your mind is a factory that's comprised of workers. Those
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: workers are controlled by two foremans, forming positive and forming negative.
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: But guess what the CEO of the company, the headman,
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: the boss is you. You come to work in the
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: morning and you say, man, today is a great day.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: I'm going to take steps towards brightening my future. I'm
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: going to take another step into making that dream come
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: true that I've been thinking about.
• 8:15
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna take another step forward in.
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: The development and the changing of my life in a positive,
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: good direction. If you come to work and say that
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: every day as the CEO the boss, the foremans can
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: only obey you, so that what you just said was
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: a series of positive statements then forming positive.
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: Steps to the forefront. He said, I got your boss
• 8:37
  Speaker 3: right away.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: He turns around, he blows the whistle sh He alerts
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: all the workers in the factory.
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: Today is a good day. Today we will take steps
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: towards our future.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: Today we are putting ourselves on track to get a
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: little bit closer to making our.
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: Dreams come true.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: Today we will be assembling all the things we need
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: to make our dreams come true in our life, life
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: better in the right direction.
• 9:02
  Speaker 3: Everybody break.
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: The workers in the factory turn around and manufactured thoughts
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: to justify the orders given by the boss, which is you.
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: You are the CEO of your corporation. If you don't
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: own nothing else, you own everything that's going on between
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: your two ears. You are the CEO of that corporation.
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: If that corporation is a good one, it's because you
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: set it up that way. If your corporation is a
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: bad one, it's because you set it up that day.
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: If you try and if you pushing towards your dreams
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: and you see the possibility of things happening in your
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: life is because you, as the CEO, set it up
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: that way. If you ain't got nothing popping, if you
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: just want to be a criminal taking stuff from people,
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: throwing your life out the window, you're gonna be an inmate.
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: You're gonna be sitting there there, and you're gonna be
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: mad at everybody. You't got nobody be mad at. But
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: you you understand what I'm telling you this morning?
• 9:56
  Speaker 3: Uh huh.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: You're listening.
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: Morning, ladies and gentlemen, now have your attention please. It's
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: Monday morning. It's the beginning of a new week. But
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: it's the same damn thing up in here. We're finn
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: turn up this volume, create this ignoress and bebouted about it.
• 10:18
  Speaker 3: I'm gone. It's Shirley Strawy, we let Steve we let
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: Ooh that sound that surely that ain't chee more time,
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: Shirley we let Steve Mann. That was fun.
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: His young people listening to this show going we live
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: and they probably ain't even saying that no more, still
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: saying we lit. I'm scared to use modern day slang.
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: I'm still going. I'm still doing you know what's happening
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: on player?
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: You know that way. I know, I know it's out
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: of style and all my talk is out of style.
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: We let calling for real? What's happening? We bought that life?
• 11:13
  Speaker 6: What's going on?
• 11:15
  Speaker 3: Junior? You got one? I'm just gonna say, morning on.
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: Tell me you got one lit light? I'm living my
• 11:25
  Speaker 3: beath life.
• 11:26
  Speaker 5: Man.
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, now, dude, this one still work turn out? Yeah?
• 11:31
  Speaker 3: That was still work.
• 11:34
  Speaker 7: On?
• 11:35
  Speaker 8: What it is?
• 11:36
  Speaker 7: That is?
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: What it is? What good?
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: What's good?
• 11:40
  Speaker 9: Yeah?
• 11:42
  Speaker 6: Everybody cool?
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: My man? Slapping five? Yeah? Did that? Did that?
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: You may as well throw it right on in there, Steed.
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: I still say right on, man, right, I still say amen.
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: When I talked to my older brother, it's like talking
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: to Marvin Gay. Man, I'm talking to shove them. Hey,
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: what's something?
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: What's happening with you? Something? Man? Give me some of
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: their skin, man, there's some skin that's five on the
• 12:17
  Speaker 3: black hand.
• 12:19
  Speaker 4: Keep it like that.
• 12:20
  Speaker 3: It's all right, man, right on? What's been going on
• 12:22
  Speaker 3: with your playing? You still doing it? Ain't you? You know,
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: people ain't easy, but somebody got to do it. It
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: might be me. Hey, dog, Yeah, what's up? What's up?
• 12:34
  Speaker 3: Telling me?
• 12:35
  Speaker 8: One of my little girls, one of her friends at
• 12:37
  Speaker 8: the house, said mister Timmy, you're lit, I said, baby,
• 12:39
  Speaker 8: I said, babe, I.
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: Don't, I don't. I don't smoke weed. I don't know
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: what you're calling. You said what That could be a
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: drunk reference either way. I wasn't there. I don't know
• 12:53
  Speaker 3: what lit me. Yeah, especially in front of your kids
• 12:56
  Speaker 3: from No, you gotta stay fresh and hiptop.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: I mean we got younger kids too, you.
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: Know, Hey, hey, hey, let me tell you what I
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: did one day in Atlanta. I came out of my
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: office with my shirt open, and my kids friends was
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: in the house. Uh oh, when you say, Dad, your
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: shirt is open, I said, I'll live here. Tell all
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: your little flat stomach ass free, turn around and quit
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: looking over there.
• 13:20
  Speaker 10: But it's so funny, Steve, You're right because we're at
• 13:23
  Speaker 10: an age now where everything we do embarrasses our kids.
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: There's nothing that we can do that where our kids
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: think we're cool. Nothing.
• 13:31
  Speaker 10: All right, listen, coming up in thirty two after the hour,
• 13:34
  Speaker 10: we'll have more of the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
• 13:36
  Speaker 11: Right after this we let turn up. You're listening Harvey
• 13:44
  Speaker 11: Morning Show.
• 13:45
  Speaker 10: All right, it's time now to start your morning off
• 13:47
  Speaker 10: with the nephew and run that brank back what you
• 13:49
  Speaker 10: got for us nev divorce papless.
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: It happened so many different ways. Let's go catch dog.
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: Hello.
• 13:58
  Speaker 3: Hello, yeah, I am trying to reach A Jones. Please.
• 14:02
  Speaker 3: My name is Attorney Guidry from the Mission Law firm.
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: She available. How you doing, man?
• 14:08
  Speaker 8: I'm actually trying to get some business rectified dealing with
• 14:12
  Speaker 8: your divorce that took place, I guess over the last
• 14:14
  Speaker 8: seven whole years.
• 14:15
  Speaker 3: My correct?
• 14:16
  Speaker 9: Correct?
• 14:17
  Speaker 8: I got some file up with your paperwork here. Now,
• 14:19
  Speaker 8: you guys had some property that you owned together, I
• 14:21
  Speaker 8: believe in Avondale.
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: Am I correct? Correct? I'm looking at your paperwork here,
• 14:26
  Speaker 3: miss Jones.
• 14:28
  Speaker 8: Okay, Now we're getting out to the property, and that
• 14:31
  Speaker 8: seems to be where the problem lies is. In Avondale,
• 14:33
  Speaker 8: you guys had some property and you sold it as
• 14:36
  Speaker 8: you both went and split your ways. Looking at the
• 14:40
  Speaker 8: paperwork that I have here, it seems like it was
• 14:43
  Speaker 8: filled out incorrectly. I don't know how seven years has
• 14:46
  Speaker 8: passed for this to come back and fall on my
• 14:48
  Speaker 8: desk to be to get rectified. But whatever the dividends
• 14:52
  Speaker 8: were that you guys took and and and shared that
• 14:56
  Speaker 8: you're now looking as if you're owing mister Jones and
• 15:00
  Speaker 8: additional eighteen thousand dollars what, ma'am, I don't know. I
• 15:06
  Speaker 8: hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I
• 15:08
  Speaker 8: wanted to bring this information to you and see how
• 15:10
  Speaker 8: we can get it rectified. I'm not looking for you
• 15:13
  Speaker 8: to have that much money available at today, but I
• 15:17
  Speaker 8: do know as a as an attorney for mister Jones,
• 15:19
  Speaker 8: I must say that we're trying to get it taken
• 15:21
  Speaker 8: care of as soon as possible.
• 15:22
  Speaker 5: Oh wait a minute, wait, wait, back this up. How
• 15:26
  Speaker 5: do I owe him eighteen dolls ever? What reason?
• 15:30
  Speaker 3: Well, the paperwork here, ma'am, seems to be what the
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: PaperWorks say. It wasn't supposed to be fifty percent, fifty
• 15:36
  Speaker 3: percent between you and what you all.
• 15:38
  Speaker 8: It should have been seventy five twenty five, and he
• 15:40
  Speaker 8: being seventy five percent of the property owed to him
• 15:43
  Speaker 8: and twenty five percent.
• 15:44
  Speaker 5: Oh no, I don't know how. What you know, Louisa
• 15:46
  Speaker 5: is a community practice, and how could he get seventy
• 15:49
  Speaker 5: five percent?
• 15:49
  Speaker 8: And I get twenty five from my understanding that he
• 15:52
  Speaker 8: paid most of the bills when you guys were living together.
• 15:55
  Speaker 5: And I don't have anything to do with that. No,
• 15:57
  Speaker 5: he didn't paid most of the You know, I work
• 16:01
  Speaker 5: and contribute.
• 16:01
  Speaker 8: To right and I understand that. But I understand from
• 16:04
  Speaker 8: what I have here on the paperwork, and I understand
• 16:06
  Speaker 8: that you had some contribution to it. But it just
• 16:08
  Speaker 8: seems like you did not contribute as much as he did.
• 16:11
  Speaker 5: And yes, indeed, I never heard no like this.
• 16:15
  Speaker 8: I do apologize, man, But what I do need you
• 16:17
  Speaker 8: to do is is definitely not use that type of
• 16:19
  Speaker 8: language while I'm on the phone.
• 16:20
  Speaker 5: Okay, well, look, I don't really have to talk to
• 16:22
  Speaker 5: you because I know I don't know. I don't owe
• 16:25
  Speaker 5: No Jones no eighteen thousand dollars and he didn't overpay
• 16:28
  Speaker 5: me because it was community profitty. I had two children
• 16:31
  Speaker 5: for him. I left with none year everything, and there's
• 16:34
  Speaker 5: no weight. I'm going to pay him no eighteen thousand dollars.
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: Man.
• 16:36
  Speaker 8: I hate to get a little abrupt with you, but
• 16:38
  Speaker 8: you are going to pay this eighteen thousand dollars.
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: Now, that's going to happen. Now.
• 16:42
  Speaker 8: If I have to garnish your check and do it,
• 16:44
  Speaker 8: then that's the way it will have to be done.
• 16:46
  Speaker 8: But the money will be coming to mister Kirk Jones
• 16:48
  Speaker 8: in the sum of eighteen thousand call it back.
• 16:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, Look, don't you hang up on me again.
• 16:55
  Speaker 8: Now, if I have to put a lien on your
• 16:57
  Speaker 8: property or put a lien on your which one do
• 16:59
  Speaker 8: you want?
• 17:00
  Speaker 5: Look, and you want to talk to me, life set, I.
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: Talk to you any way.
• 17:03
  Speaker 5: I want to to talk about because what I went
• 17:05
  Speaker 5: to Kurk that all out was over with.
• 17:08
  Speaker 8: You're gonna pay eighteen thousand dollars, that's what you're gonna do.
• 17:11
  Speaker 12: Uh huh.
• 17:12
  Speaker 3: Now, I don't want to have to come to your house,
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: ma'am to pick up this money, but I will.
• 17:16
  Speaker 5: I'm not working. I want to know how to do
• 17:18
  Speaker 5: I have to pay him eighteen thousand.
• 17:20
  Speaker 8: See, you're not working. That's our problem from the start.
• 17:23
  Speaker 8: That's why it wasn't fifty to fifty. That's why it
• 17:25
  Speaker 8: was seventy five twenty five, because you were not holding
• 17:27
  Speaker 8: them round.
• 17:28
  Speaker 5: I work all through the upstair that man twenty six
• 17:30
  Speaker 5: years and I worked.
• 17:32
  Speaker 3: Well, what is your butt doing now?
• 17:34
  Speaker 9: Nothing?
• 17:35
  Speaker 3: Well, there we go. That seems to be the root
• 17:37
  Speaker 3: of our problem, isn't it.
• 17:38
  Speaker 5: No, that ain't a rule of no time? Because I
• 17:40
  Speaker 5: want to know how did Kirk could get eighteen percent?
• 17:43
  Speaker 5: And re read that as a community property. He had
• 17:46
  Speaker 5: his laune and I had my life. He agreed to
• 17:48
  Speaker 5: it and that was that. So I don't know how
• 17:50
  Speaker 5: I owe him eighteen thousand, ma'am.
• 17:52
  Speaker 3: That's the way the problem was.
• 17:54
  Speaker 8: Evidently you didn't read the paperwork that you signed when
• 17:56
  Speaker 8: you and Kirk separated seven years ago. Now, if you
• 17:59
  Speaker 8: didn't read your pay paper work correctly, this is why
• 18:01
  Speaker 8: it comes back to bite you in your butt.
• 18:03
  Speaker 5: Oh no, it's not. Because I had a lawyer and
• 18:06
  Speaker 5: he had his lawyer. We agree with that. That was
• 18:09
  Speaker 5: back and forward, and we agree with everything he signed
• 18:12
  Speaker 5: up to and that was done.
• 18:13
  Speaker 8: Well, maybe you didn't have a lawyer that was worth
• 18:15
  Speaker 8: for them who didn't read the bottom of the paperwork himself.
• 18:18
  Speaker 5: And I had a lawyer. Thought I had a.
• 18:20
  Speaker 3: Good lawyer, and I understand that. Man, when that happens
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: a lot of a lot.
• 18:23
  Speaker 9: Of times, I can't believe that.
• 18:25
  Speaker 5: And I had two children struggle with him, and we
• 18:28
  Speaker 5: got what we got by both of us worked. And
• 18:30
  Speaker 5: this he gonna come back and tell and oh no,
• 18:34
  Speaker 5: I'm gonna fight this.
• 18:35
  Speaker 8: When can we expect the payment starting to work on
• 18:37
  Speaker 8: this eighteen thousand? I don't know, well, I mean, I'm
• 18:40
  Speaker 8: gonna have to get a date or something where I
• 18:42
  Speaker 8: can start getting five hundred dollars from you per month
• 18:45
  Speaker 8: or something like that.
• 18:46
  Speaker 5: Yes, Indy, five hundred a month. I haven't worked. I
• 18:49
  Speaker 5: was working and when you want to sit. I don't
• 18:51
  Speaker 5: think I should have to tell you all this because
• 18:54
  Speaker 5: I need to get talked to me a lawyer, because
• 18:56
  Speaker 5: I'm not agreeing to anything, because I don't think that
• 18:59
  Speaker 5: it's not fair. I tell you give me a dad,
• 19:03
  Speaker 5: not because I'm going to have to get me a lawyer.
• 19:06
  Speaker 3: I'm trying to keep my composent as an attorney, ma'am.
• 19:09
  Speaker 5: How do you have to write? And I don't have
• 19:11
  Speaker 5: no say so? Over there?
• 19:12
  Speaker 3: Are you? Are you? Have you remarried? No?
• 19:14
  Speaker 5: I haven't.
• 19:15
  Speaker 8: Okay, you realize if I don't get the money, then
• 19:19
  Speaker 8: I don't get paid. Right listen, I'm going to be
• 19:22
  Speaker 8: down in your area probably on Wednesday. Do you think
• 19:25
  Speaker 8: you and I can get together and probably talk about
• 19:27
  Speaker 8: this because I want to help you as much as
• 19:29
  Speaker 8: I can.
• 19:30
  Speaker 5: Yes, because I don't think it's fair to me. When's
• 19:32
  Speaker 5: the wed I'm not I could be there.
• 19:35
  Speaker 3: Well, you think that maybe you and I can get
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: together maybe and work something out.
• 19:39
  Speaker 5: Yees, because I know I'm not. I mean, I cannot
• 19:42
  Speaker 5: afford to pay No eighteen hundred, you know, took the
• 19:45
  Speaker 5: house from me for little or nothing.
• 19:46
  Speaker 3: And I tell you what, I tell you what I
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: do this. I won't.
• 19:49
  Speaker 8: I won't tell mister Jones anything but only on one condition.
• 19:53
  Speaker 8: That's me and you being able to work this thing
• 19:55
  Speaker 8: out behind clubs doors.
• 19:56
  Speaker 5: What you mean work it out?
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: I mean work it out.
• 19:59
  Speaker 9: What do you mean?
• 20:00
  Speaker 3: What do you think? I mean?
• 20:02
  Speaker 5: I don't know.
• 20:02
  Speaker 9: Tell me, well, maybe you know, like I'm dumb, some.
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: Relations or something.
• 20:08
  Speaker 5: Why would you want a relationship with me?
• 20:10
  Speaker 3: Not that relationship, but just you know, maybe kind of
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: kick him, kick your way.
• 20:18
  Speaker 9: I'm dumb. I don't know.
• 20:19
  Speaker 5: I don't know nothing about life.
• 20:21
  Speaker 3: I think you know a whole lot about life.
• 20:23
  Speaker 9: No, I don't.
• 20:24
  Speaker 5: But why is you messing with me?
• 20:26
  Speaker 3: I just want to see awaken, maybe get together.
• 20:28
  Speaker 8: I'll throw all this paperwork out and I'm like, no,
• 20:30
  Speaker 8: it's not possible, but you make me Wednesday, I'll make.
• 20:35
  Speaker 3: This thing go away.
• 20:36
  Speaker 5: I don't believe that.
• 20:37
  Speaker 3: I'll tell you what else. You ain't gonna believe.
• 20:40
  Speaker 8: This is Nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
• 20:42
  Speaker 8: You just got pranked by your sister Janets.
• 20:47
  Speaker 9: You no good, You just got about the whole family.
• 20:57
  Speaker 11: Come on, you're listening Steve Morning Show. Time for ask
• 21:02
  Speaker 11: the clo.
• 21:04
  Speaker 10: Chief Love Officer Steve Harvey in the building, ready for
• 21:07
  Speaker 10: your questions. Courtney and iHeart. A listener says, I'm thirty
• 21:12
  Speaker 10: and dating a man that's thirty one, and he tells
• 21:15
  Speaker 10: me all the time that I'm his soulmate. He's all
• 21:18
  Speaker 10: into me in every way. He gives me baths and pedicures,
• 21:23
  Speaker 10: and he even will polish my toenails if I ask
• 21:26
  Speaker 10: him to. He irons my clothes for me daily, and
• 21:29
  Speaker 10: he cleans up the kitchen if I cook. We never argue,
• 21:33
  Speaker 10: and if we ever disagree, we settle it quickly. Listen,
• 21:39
  Speaker 10: He's so different than any other guy I've dated. My
• 21:42
  Speaker 10: daddy says he's soft and won't make a good husband.
• 21:46
  Speaker 10: How can my daddy make such a negative assumption.
• 21:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's better to be soft and be a soft. Well,
• 21:52
  Speaker 3: nothing says that the man is soft. Just solved to
• 21:55
  Speaker 3: his dad.
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: Maybe her father's hard and made may and music good husband.
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: So he thinking, because this dude ain't hard he must
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: be soft. Lady, if you have no complaints, don't let
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: your father create one.
• 22:12
  Speaker 11: This guy's a dream.
• 22:14
  Speaker 3: There you go, ash, Well, I can't say that, all right?
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: What I can't say that because somebody I was gonna say,
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: maybe you should ask your mom how happy she's been
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: with how she would feel with some treatment like that,
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: because your daddy he ain't gonna do none of that.
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: He owes to that.
• 22:36
  Speaker 11: Yeah, all right? Moving on Keinetra in Memphis Rights.
• 22:39
  Speaker 10: I'm a forty two year old divorced woman and I
• 22:42
  Speaker 10: fell in love with the perfect guy, but I ran
• 22:45
  Speaker 10: him away by being paranoid. I had a rough marriage
• 22:48
  Speaker 10: and my husband cheated, so I developed bad habits like
• 22:52
  Speaker 10: checking his phone and popping up at places he was
• 22:54
  Speaker 10: hanging out. I carried this behavior into my new relationship
• 22:58
  Speaker 10: and was always accusing my new messing around. I want
• 23:01
  Speaker 10: a second chance with him, and I want him to
• 23:03
  Speaker 10: know that I changed. How do I start the conversation
• 23:07
  Speaker 10: with him?
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: Luggage? You know what? You know what?
• 23:11
  Speaker 7: What?
• 23:13
  Speaker 5: Boy?
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: I was tripping? You know, you know it's so crazy
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: because you know, I know you a good man, but
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: I'm so stupid. I'd be taking your phone.
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: And you know, you ain't even know I'd be outside
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: the ball waiting on you. I'll be at your house.
• 23:29
  Speaker 11: That's crazy.
• 23:30
  Speaker 3: And I just, you know, I just been you know,
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: but it was my ex. He just made me his way.
• 23:34
  Speaker 2: But you know what, I'm not gonna do that anymore
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: because I think I found what I'm looking for.
• 23:40
  Speaker 5: You know.
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, l yeah, it might work, but I doubt it
• 23:48
  Speaker 3: all right.
• 23:48
  Speaker 10: So, Tony in the Bay Area says, I'm a thirty
• 23:51
  Speaker 10: three year old married man raising my two daughters while
• 23:55
  Speaker 10: my wife is in jail for sixteen months. She committed
• 23:58
  Speaker 10: credit card fraud and I was clueless when she got arrested.
• 24:03
  Speaker 10: The problem I'm having now is that she only calls
• 24:06
  Speaker 10: us once a week if then she calls her mom daily,
• 24:10
  Speaker 10: and it ticks me off. Her mom said, she's still
• 24:13
  Speaker 10: ashamed to talk to me. But I don't believe that
• 24:16
  Speaker 10: she had a whole side hustle that I didn't know about.
• 24:19
  Speaker 10: So do you think she has a side due too?
• 24:22
  Speaker 10: Am I being a fool for waiting for her?
• 24:24
  Speaker 4: Wow?
• 24:25
  Speaker 3: Whoa a side? Dude? Yeah?
• 24:28
  Speaker 11: He wants to know.
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah, well you don't know what.
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but bruh, listen to me. Credit card theft ain't
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: got nothing to do with a side dude. She might be,
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: you know, honestly just embarrassed. The mom could be right,
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: I don't know where you got the other dude.
• 24:49
  Speaker 10: From, because she kept back from him, you know, she
• 24:53
  Speaker 10: she was more she keeps secrets.
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: So he's okay, well, well, okay, okay. Then go with
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: that theory, you know, go with that theory and see
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: how that work out for you. Sometimes being paranoid about
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: stuff that you have no facts on it, it's a
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: waste of time. It's like, why are you're tripping yourself
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: out about something that you don't.
• 25:14
  Speaker 3: Even have the facts? But uncle, if she lied about that,
• 25:17
  Speaker 3: what he thinking is she probably has some most skeletons,
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: That's what it is.
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: Well, excuse me, but nephew, Tommy, because you lie about
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: one thing, don't mean that you lie about everything.
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: Well nothing when I lie, well, nor when I lied? No,
• 25:33
  Speaker 3: surely no, because you.
• 25:38
  Speaker 11: Usually have you know, when you tell one tell another
• 25:41
  Speaker 11: line another life.
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: But you I mean, I'm just saying this.
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: Because you lie about one thing don't mean you'll lie
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: about all things.
• 25:50
  Speaker 3: Now, if you want to accept the paranoia and act
• 25:53
  Speaker 3: on it, then go ahead.
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: But the woman might not have nothing to do with
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: no other dude. She called once a week, she and bad,
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: She called her mama daily. How close once y'all before
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: she went.
• 26:06
  Speaker 11: In wildy not as close as he thought they were.
• 26:10
  Speaker 3: Why was you doing all this anyway? I mean, why
• 26:13
  Speaker 3: was she doing all this anyway?
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: Something else is going on, bro, And now you're thinking
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: it's another dude in the picture. When she went to
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: jail for credit card fraud, she didn't go to jail
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: with an accomplished that was a dude.
• 26:28
  Speaker 3: She went by herself. Maybe we need to see what
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: she was buying with the credit card. I mean we
• 26:32
  Speaker 3: got hotels on it and a whole bunch of other stuff. Yeah. See,
• 26:38
  Speaker 3: you know, why don't we just letting mister negativity here?
• 26:41
  Speaker 11: He's a person's raising two daughters.
• 26:45
  Speaker 3: I'm talking about. I don't know how I became negativity.
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: I'm negativity.
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: She just let him ask all the little negative asked
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: questions so he can break up this family.
• 26:56
  Speaker 11: All right, we're moving we're moving on.
• 26:59
  Speaker 3: I know you agree with him, Jay because you ignorant,
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: So one j understands me.
• 27:07
  Speaker 10: Let's get to this one Ken and Huntsville says, I'm
• 27:10
  Speaker 10: fifty two, and I recently met a fifty five year
• 27:12
  Speaker 10: old man on an online dating site. He has never
• 27:15
  Speaker 10: been married and he is one adult child. I am
• 27:18
  Speaker 10: divorced and I have one child in college. I bought
• 27:20
  Speaker 10: a small house after my divorce, and he's living in
• 27:23
  Speaker 10: a one bedroom apartment. We both are teachers and we're
• 27:26
  Speaker 10: both Baptist. Other than that, we don't seem to be
• 27:28
  Speaker 10: on the same page. To be honest, I had hoped
• 27:31
  Speaker 10: to meet a man that didn't still live in an apartment.
• 27:33
  Speaker 10: Am I focused on the wrong thing? Should I get
• 27:36
  Speaker 10: to know him anyway?
• 27:37
  Speaker 3: CLO, I mean, you got every right.
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: To focus on what you want to focus on day
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: your priorities. If you want a man that's a home
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: owner fifty two, then maybe that's one of your qualifications,
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: and you can pass up on a good man. If
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: he ain't never been married, maybe he ain't never had
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: a reason by house, I don't know, or he couldn't
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: live with somebody. He just said he ain't been married.
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: You know, he ain't lived with nobody.
• 28:00
  Speaker 7: You know?
• 28:02
  Speaker 11: All right, Well, thank you see all.
• 28:03
  Speaker 3: Once again, you could ask mister negativity what he want.
• 28:06
  Speaker 11: To do with coniversial?
• 28:08
  Speaker 3: Can let everybody off. You know, let everybody just break up.
• 28:11
  Speaker 11: You're listening hard Morning show.
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: All right, we're gonna go around the room with you
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: three guys. Okay, what's the biggest light you ever told?
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: Tommy started off my son, my oldest son.
• 28:25
  Speaker 8: When he was younger, he wanted to go to PG
• 28:29
  Speaker 8: thirteen movies. I always knew it was gonna be something
• 28:32
  Speaker 8: that he didn't need to see. He didn't know, but
• 28:34
  Speaker 8: I would tell him, Hey, do you know what PG
• 28:38
  Speaker 8: thirteen means?
• 28:39
  Speaker 3: He's like no.
• 28:39
  Speaker 8: I say that means only thirteen people can go in
• 28:43
  Speaker 8: the movie. So when I when we would get there,
• 28:46
  Speaker 8: I say it's already twelve people in there.
• 28:49
  Speaker 3: We can't go in there. It's too late.
• 28:52
  Speaker 8: And he would be like, wow, we don't never get
• 28:54
  Speaker 8: here in time enough to see any PG thirteen movies.
• 28:58
  Speaker 8: We're gonna have to go see a G movie. We're
• 28:59
  Speaker 8: gonna go see a GM. We'd be all up in line, king,
• 29:02
  Speaker 8: we not going to see EG. Your mama ain't finna
• 29:05
  Speaker 8: be mad? All right, what's the biggest lie you ever?
• 29:10
  Speaker 3: I need to make sure that my mama ain't listening.
• 29:13
  Speaker 11: Huh oh man, I uh.
• 29:18
  Speaker 12: I was at football sixteen years old, and my mama
• 29:22
  Speaker 12: let me take her truck to practice. And you know,
• 29:25
  Speaker 12: after practice, my boy get in the truck, were driving back.
• 29:27
  Speaker 12: I took my mama brand new blazer. And you know,
• 29:31
  Speaker 12: after practice, my boy get in the truck were driving back.
• 29:34
  Speaker 12: I took my mama brand new blazer and backed it
• 29:38
  Speaker 12: and got it stuck on the side and then it
• 29:41
  Speaker 12: the whole left side on the school bus.
• 29:45
  Speaker 8: Ah.
• 29:45
  Speaker 3: My boy said, man, I can't let you go back
• 29:47
  Speaker 3: home with the truth.
• 29:48
  Speaker 11: Uh huh, you got to say that bus back then
• 29:51
  Speaker 11: into you.
• 29:51
  Speaker 12: Okay, boy, he said, you can't walk in mama brand.
• 29:55
  Speaker 12: He got this tag still on it. It ain't no
• 29:57
  Speaker 12: license plate. Man, I walked in the Mama's said what
• 30:00
  Speaker 12: happened to that truck? And my boys went and talking.
• 30:03
  Speaker 12: We was just butting up our seat best. You know,
• 30:05
  Speaker 12: A school bus hid us.
• 30:07
  Speaker 3: Boy.
• 30:08
  Speaker 12: My mama bought that for about two months. About two months,
• 30:13
  Speaker 12: she said, she said, why you ain't getting no case?
• 30:17
  Speaker 5: Right?
• 30:17
  Speaker 3: I got asked, I received that sixty.
• 30:23
  Speaker 11: I was fast after that.
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: I was really fast, all right.
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: Steve, you you started telling us about this woman.
• 30:32
  Speaker 3: I met this girl and in college, Lord, she was
• 30:38
  Speaker 3: fine creole girl.
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: My brother told me how to get her, and he
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: gave me some money to take out, so I told
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: her to pick a restaurant. She picked a creole restaurant.
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: Now I'm seventeen, I ain't had no creole food, so
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: I'm in.
• 30:51
  Speaker 3: I go in there.
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: She didne ordered all this spicy stuff. If to fay
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: all this but spicey though, yeah, yeah, I'm eating stuff.
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: Man ain't never been in my system. So I'm taking
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: her home and my stomach is turning it. So we
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: get at the front of the house. I'm gonna walk
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: up to the door. She said, come on in for
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: a little while. My mama and them gone.
• 31:13
  Speaker 5: Oh.
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: Now, my mama had told me, when your stomach just
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: tore up, try to go home. Yes, yeah, don't put
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: that in nobody else house.
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: Great advice, yes, But she was so fine.
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: I just said, well, man, let me go on in
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: here for a little while, because I what kind of
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: man would I be?
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: Fine?
• 31:30
  Speaker 3: Chick invite you in, and mama and daddy ain't there.
• 31:32
  Speaker 3: Let me at least go on in here.
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: Something but your stomach.
• 31:35
  Speaker 3: I mean, really, sureley, this a girl el man would
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: have went in there.
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: I'm sitting there on the country watching TV. My stomach
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: is turning.
• 31:46
  Speaker 3: I can hear it.
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: So I said, can I go to the bathroom? She said,
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: second door on the left. I go in there, and
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: Lord have mercy. The walls are gibalta id have grabbed
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: the tie rack in front of me to just try
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: to hang on. I'm twisting the guest tile in my
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: head like I'm ringing it out. I didn't knock the
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: toilet tissue holder off the wall screws out everything I
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: done kicked over the trash.
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: Can you can hear this right?
• 32:25
  Speaker 3: I don't hear.
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: Wasn't feeling what I was feeling. But I'm using the
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: bathroom so much that was alarming to me. You I've
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: actually put more in there than I've ever put in
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: there in my life prior to I.
• 32:47
  Speaker 3: Didn't know what you don't stop my story, Shi, this
• 32:52
  Speaker 3: is for junior time.
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: So I'm filling the bowl of so finally I'm done,
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: to my relief, but I'm sweat.
• 33:01
  Speaker 3: I'm talking about I'm in there.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: Shirt my shirt wide.
• 33:06
  Speaker 3: I had button my whole shirt. It's wide over.
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: I had hung my pants up on the back of
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: the dunk because I use the bathroom like my daddy
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: always hang my pants and draws.
• 33:19
  Speaker 3: Up on the back of the shirt because yeah, that
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: you don't ever use the bathroom.
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: But I got my shirt on, but I didn't open
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: it up because it's hot. I got just just water
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: coming down out the front.
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: So I stand on.
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: And I flushed the toilet. Now I'm putting my clothes on.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: But you know how you're waiting to hear that sound
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: that all I hear is to swirl it. And I
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: turned around and just rising rising, And I'm asking God
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: not to do this to me today. I'm asking God,
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: don't not today, Lord not in him.
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: To have a Part three.
• 34:12
  Speaker 3: This ain't the time for this. Lord, stop this swirl
• 34:19
  Speaker 3: from rising. The email. God, you ain't ever held me now.
• 34:27
  Speaker 10: Oh God, Steve, we have to go to Miss ANNs
• 34:30
  Speaker 10: though I will, but Jesus will.
• 34:33
  Speaker 3: Stop this swirl. But it's steady coming God. Part two.
• 34:39
  Speaker 3: Right after this, you're listening.
• 34:42
  Speaker 11: Morning show.
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: Here we are, Steve.
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: I'm back, Just catch up.
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: I'm over this fring girl house stomach toe up the
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: eight grillold food seventeen. Should have went home and used
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: the bathroom set in the house be cause she's fine.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: Now I'm in here using the bathroom and all hell
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: and broke again. Come on, I'm in here, neked, sitting
• 35:03
  Speaker 2: on the carlet.
• 35:04
  Speaker 3: Just my shirt on because I like to shit wide.
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: I like to be open and free, and I need
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: it because I had to brace myself a couple of times.
• 35:12
  Speaker 3: But she never came in there to tell note she coming,
• 35:16
  Speaker 3: that's coming in the store. So I get up.
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: I finally get through, but I've noticed that I'm putting
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: more in the bowls than ever before, so I'm a
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: little bit concerned with them sheer volume. So I flushed
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: the tarlet as I'm putting my pasts back up on me,
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: and I'm waiting to hear that.
• 35:35
  Speaker 3: But I don't hear it. And I look back and
• 35:38
  Speaker 3: his rise. It's just going in a slow circle. So
• 35:43
  Speaker 3: I go in. I go to my heavenly father.
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: Here, Father God, pray on the little boy, pray now long,
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: stop this rise in time. Wow, somehow, don't let this
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: swirl get up by the top. But he didn't hear
• 36:01
  Speaker 2: me that day.
• 36:02
  Speaker 3: I guess it wasn't less. The next thing I know,
• 36:05
  Speaker 3: it's at the very top of the toilet. Oh my god,
• 36:09
  Speaker 3: and it's about to flow over.
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: So now I don't know what to do. So I
• 36:16
  Speaker 2: look down and it's a trash can. So I dipped
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: the trash can down in it, and I got a
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: trash can full of it here. So I pull on
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: a shower curtain bag and throw it in the bathtube.
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: But here comes some more. So I had to take
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: another trash can full of it and throw another trash
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: can in the bath tub, and here comes some damn more.
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: So now I realized they call it is broke backed up,
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: and it started going back down. I say, I got
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: to get some water and put it in here. So
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: I started running water in the trash can to pour
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: it down there and make the water go clean.
• 37:08
  Speaker 3: So I finally did that. Yeah, and I said, thank
• 37:12
  Speaker 3: you Lord. And I looked over and the damn bathtub
• 37:17
  Speaker 3: is tripe shower coat this I look, come, it's on
• 37:26
  Speaker 3: the wall.
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: Wait, wait, it's on the wall.
• 37:30
  Speaker 3: Four part four.
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: Hold, this is this is all Kelly's in the closet.
• 37:36
  Speaker 2: This is Steve Hollis in the bathroom. Trapped parts, folks
• 37:41
  Speaker 2: coming up.
• 37:42
  Speaker 3: Right over there, trapping in the bathroom. Part folk.
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: It's on the walls, the shower curtain and the bathtub
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: is shot.
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: You're listening.
• 37:53
  Speaker 11: Morning Show.
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: Indeed, trapped in the bathroom, all are killing in the
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: clothes part folk. Yeah, I done veiled out three buckets,
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: dragged hands, a pure mess, then.
• 38:12
  Speaker 3: Throw it in the shower.
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: So when I get all of the water back in
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: the tarlet where I got it, something in the water.
• 38:18
  Speaker 3: Clean, I said, okay, cool. I look over the damn
• 38:23
  Speaker 3: vathtub is stracked.
• 38:25
  Speaker 13: So now I cut these people shower on you, and
• 38:31
  Speaker 13: I'm washing down the walls, the shower curtain with the shower.
• 38:36
  Speaker 2: The girl comes up to the DoD because I've been
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: in here now about forty five minutes.
• 38:42
  Speaker 3: Long time. So she said, you okay, now everything.
• 38:51
  Speaker 2: She said it sounds like something wrong in that to
• 38:58
  Speaker 2: get away from the said, well, okay, my house.
• 39:02
  Speaker 3: So I'm in there. It's this too late. But I
• 39:06
  Speaker 3: noticed they got a candle in the bathroom. Oh I
• 39:09
  Speaker 3: light it.
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: I like the candle starts striking matches and running tapwater.
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: That's for my mama always told me, strike some matches
• 39:17
  Speaker 3: and run some tapwater. It'll help you get rid of
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: older there.
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: But now I'm washing down shallow curtains, walls, the bath
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: tub is getting up stuff off the float.
• 39:28
  Speaker 3: I'm just in here.
• 39:29
  Speaker 8: Now.
• 39:29
  Speaker 3: Now you probably saying, te what is you washing it
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: down with?
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, wasn't no paper towels in there, but that tie
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: rack that I had grabbed when I first sat down
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: and was twisting it.
• 39:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, they guessed tiles.
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: And the forward.
• 39:47
  Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah that what I washed.
• 39:51
  Speaker 9: It down with.
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: My good towel.
• 39:54
  Speaker 3: That is tie is brown because I can't miss it.
• 39:59
  Speaker 3: All the color was when it started, they was pink.
• 40:06
  Speaker 3: Now the times is running. I have washed all the
• 40:09
  Speaker 3: walls down.
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: Everything I'm in that sweating has been on a construction
• 40:14
  Speaker 2: sitele you. I've been in there total about damn near hour.
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: So I put them I fastened my clothes, I look
• 40:23
  Speaker 2: in the bathrooms. I got everything up, but I got
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: this big, nasty ass tile and I don't know what
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: to do with it. So I take it, put it
• 40:31
  Speaker 2: in the waste paper can that I've been bailing with,
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: and struck all that under the sea.
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: I figured this ain't finna be good, no how, but
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: at least when they come in here, then it's gonna
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: take a moment because I know when you go.
• 40:48
  Speaker 3: In there, you're gonna have to say what they hit.
• 40:52
  Speaker 3: Because I couldn't remember how the shower curtain was and
• 40:54
  Speaker 3: none of that now I got I looked. I'm telling you,
• 40:57
  Speaker 3: I got everything off right.
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: So I walked down the hallway. She sitting on the
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: couch with an attitude.
• 41:06
  Speaker 3: Folded.
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: Then she look at me and she said, why you
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: been in there so long? I said, I had a
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: little accident. Then she said, oh my god, look at you.
• 41:16
  Speaker 3: What was it? I didn't realize when I was barely
• 41:23
  Speaker 3: all that mess.
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: Into the shower, it was splashing on my pants below
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: my knee.
• 41:32
  Speaker 3: I ain't had time to look at this because I'm
• 41:35
  Speaker 3: busy cleaning up that damn house.
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: I look down, it's just specks, splash marks from my
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: knee down.
• 41:46
  Speaker 3: My pants was trifing. I looked at her. She looked
• 41:50
  Speaker 3: at me and she said, oh my god, look at you.
• 41:53
  Speaker 3: What have you been doing.
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: I looked at her, said you ain't got to talk
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: to me like that. Why got in my car? Had
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: to ride home with all my windows down cause I
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: smelled like a scump sitting in that call. That girl
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: saw me on the campus next day and all her
• 42:23
  Speaker 2: girlfriend was looking at me like I had never met her.
• 42:28
  Speaker 3: And that was.
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: Wow, trapped trapped.
• 42:35
  Speaker 3: Claw And I'm gonna put some music to that.
• 42:37
  Speaker 10: All right, all right, nephew tell me coming up next
• 42:41
  Speaker 10: with the prank phone call.
• 42:43
  Speaker 11: You're listening.
• 42:46
  Speaker 10: Morning show, coming up at the top of the hour,
• 42:49
  Speaker 10: right about four minutes after today's strawberry letter. But up next,
• 42:52
  Speaker 10: nephew Tommy right here with today's prank phone call.
• 42:56
  Speaker 3: What you got?
• 42:56
  Speaker 11: F are you?
• 42:59
  Speaker 3: Wait? What are you?
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: What's round for?
• 43:03
  Speaker 3: My mama care? He's crying, Mama, my mama tree. Mama
• 43:12
  Speaker 3: got your mother's tree. My mama makes you hie, my
• 43:17
  Speaker 3: mama tree, my mama tree.
• 43:21
  Speaker 11: So method with his acting.
• 43:23
  Speaker 3: That's that tree. That's that tree. We play hide and
• 43:29
  Speaker 3: go seek out.
• 43:32
  Speaker 8: Five ten fifty, about thirty thirty five fifty, big thing
• 43:37
  Speaker 8: about that about it?
• 43:38
  Speaker 3: Bread? Not here I come. That's my that's my mama.
• 43:42
  Speaker 3: Tell mama, Thank God? Got up? Hello, man, speak to lord.
• 43:52
  Speaker 9: Yeah, Lord terror. Oh this terror about ten minutes from
• 43:57
  Speaker 9: the yard picked dog.
• 43:58
  Speaker 3: This ain't no cheer. Look man, is this lord that
• 44:01
  Speaker 3: worked for Bush?
• 44:02
  Speaker 8: Yes, sir, listen, you just came down Clayton Street and
• 44:06
  Speaker 8: hit me and tow all the limbs off my mama
• 44:08
  Speaker 8: maple tree that's hanging over the street. And now she
• 44:11
  Speaker 8: got limbs hanging all in the street. We got to
• 44:13
  Speaker 8: cut this whole tree down because.
• 44:14
  Speaker 3: You then messed it up. And you're the one that
• 44:16
  Speaker 3: just drove through here.
• 44:18
  Speaker 9: Hey, sir, I ain't been down Clayton Street today, Sir,
• 44:21
  Speaker 9: say what. I ain't been down Clayton Street today. I
• 44:23
  Speaker 9: ain't been in a residential neighborhood today.
• 44:25
  Speaker 8: You just came down Clayton Street a couple hours ago
• 44:28
  Speaker 8: and then tow all the limbs off.
• 44:30
  Speaker 3: My mama tree. Sorry, my mama, that tree been in
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: our finished twenty five years. And if you just came
• 44:35
  Speaker 3: down the street and just tow it.
• 44:37
  Speaker 9: All apart, Sir, I ain't been down Clayton Roll today.
• 44:39
  Speaker 9: How did you get this number?
• 44:40
  Speaker 8: By the way, don't worry about how I got your number.
• 44:43
  Speaker 8: Somebody got to play for my mama tree.
• 44:45
  Speaker 9: Well, sir, I ain't been down Clayton Road today. I'm sorry.
• 44:48
  Speaker 3: Call it call him back down?
• 44:50
  Speaker 9: Hello, Lord?
• 44:52
  Speaker 3: Did you just hang up on me?
• 44:54
  Speaker 9: Yes, sir, I told you I didn't been down on
• 44:55
  Speaker 9: the Clayton Road today, Now you know what.
• 44:58
  Speaker 3: Look, I told you. You just came Clayton Road and
• 45:01
  Speaker 3: just and just told my mama tree up and.
• 45:03
  Speaker 9: All live down the residential neighborhood today. Man, quit calling
• 45:06
  Speaker 9: my phone with that.
• 45:08
  Speaker 3: Look, my grandmama planted that tree. Now you don't have
• 45:11
  Speaker 3: to do that.
• 45:11
  Speaker 9: Planet It moved them up, then cut the branches off.
• 45:14
  Speaker 9: The ceomers and them branches is clear enough.
• 45:17
  Speaker 8: You're not supposed to be driving them eighteen wheel trucks
• 45:19
  Speaker 8: down this residential area like this here.
• 45:22
  Speaker 9: Man, I was making delivery. Got if I had to
• 45:25
  Speaker 9: come down that street, I would have. But I told
• 45:27
  Speaker 9: you one, I ain't came down on Clayton Street today.
• 45:30
  Speaker 8: You just said you had to make a delivery. Now
• 45:32
  Speaker 8: you saying you ain't been down Clayton Street.
• 45:34
  Speaker 9: I hadn't deliver down there. I would have came down
• 45:37
  Speaker 9: that street. You ain't had to come down there.
• 45:39
  Speaker 3: You've been on Clayton Street today. Now that part I
• 45:42
  Speaker 3: do know?
• 45:43
  Speaker 9: And what you got the wrong driver?
• 45:45
  Speaker 3: Dude? No no, no, no, no no no, I got
• 45:47
  Speaker 3: the right driver. And what I do know?
• 45:49
  Speaker 8: Will you then told my mama tree up, we got
• 45:51
  Speaker 8: to cut this on tree down, and you.
• 45:53
  Speaker 3: Know what you gonna pay for this?
• 45:55
  Speaker 9: Then, I ain't saying for a muddle tree that I
• 45:59
  Speaker 9: know you ain't talking by my mama tree. Well guess
• 46:02
  Speaker 9: what take your tree and take your bama and both
• 46:06
  Speaker 9: of y'all go out there and playing another street.
• 46:08
  Speaker 8: Then we ain't playing no more tree. That tree been
• 46:11
  Speaker 8: in our family for years. You're gonna mess around and
• 46:13
  Speaker 8: get your swoop behind this tree.
• 46:15
  Speaker 9: Bring it on, then bring your dong and bring the
• 46:18
  Speaker 9: tree with you.
• 46:18
  Speaker 3: You're gonna make me whoop with a bridge off that tree.
• 46:22
  Speaker 9: Well, I tell you what if you that bad? Then
• 46:25
  Speaker 9: I tell you what if I was on Clayton Street today.
• 46:28
  Speaker 9: I meet you on Clayton Street with the tree.
• 46:31
  Speaker 8: You come on over here to Clayton right now, because
• 46:33
  Speaker 8: I'm right out here in the street on the cartner's phone.
• 46:36
  Speaker 8: You come on outside. My mama sitting up in there
• 46:39
  Speaker 8: crying behind this tree because you done toe the limbs
• 46:41
  Speaker 8: off of it and we got to cut it down after.
• 46:43
  Speaker 3: You done mess it up.
• 46:44
  Speaker 9: Don't give her napkin, this yellow wife but mine. Then,
• 46:48
  Speaker 9: I ain't been down the street.
• 46:50
  Speaker 8: I know you ain't sitting there talking about my mama.
• 46:52
  Speaker 8: Now see you tripping now, dog ain't tripping? Dog you
• 46:55
  Speaker 8: already Look man, I grew up with this tree in
• 46:59
  Speaker 8: my front yard.
• 47:00
  Speaker 3: I grew up with this tree.
• 47:01
  Speaker 8: Now you got the nerve to drive through here and
• 47:03
  Speaker 8: driving too fast, because if you would have drove so,
• 47:06
  Speaker 8: you wouldn't have been hitting all them limbs like that,
• 47:08
  Speaker 8: y'all be doing running.
• 47:09
  Speaker 9: Down here too fast, dough here, man, look here, I
• 47:12
  Speaker 9: told you once. Man, I ain't been down on Clayton Street. Now,
• 47:15
  Speaker 9: like I told you, if you want to meet me
• 47:17
  Speaker 9: on Clayton Street, will all right now, I'm sorry about
• 47:20
  Speaker 9: your mom trees, but hell, there ain't nothing I can
• 47:23
  Speaker 9: do about it, because I ain't been down on Clayton Street.
• 47:25
  Speaker 3: It's one that you can do about it. You can
• 47:27
  Speaker 3: pay for it, and that's what you're gonna do.
• 47:29
  Speaker 9: Now.
• 47:29
  Speaker 3: You're gonna either give me some money.
• 47:31
  Speaker 8: I'm gonna get it at you, but you you gonna
• 47:34
  Speaker 8: you coming over here. Matter of fact, you can gonna
• 47:36
  Speaker 8: come over here now that big truck around and bring
• 47:40
  Speaker 8: your butt on over here right now.
• 47:42
  Speaker 9: Well, I might will going to turn it around because
• 47:44
  Speaker 9: I ain't paying for no street. I'm kidding right now.
• 47:47
  Speaker 8: That's fine, that's fine, But I tell you, when you
• 47:49
  Speaker 8: get here, my cousin here and all my uncles is
• 47:52
  Speaker 8: here sitting up here looking at that.
• 47:53
  Speaker 3: What you done done in this tree? So bring yo own?
• 47:57
  Speaker 9: Yeah, well, look at here, take that tree and stuve
• 48:01
  Speaker 9: it up. You out your yo, all right. I ain't
• 48:04
  Speaker 9: in the world with you in this tree no more
• 48:06
  Speaker 9: because I done told you one. Let me aim this tree.
• 48:09
  Speaker 8: You come on right now because you don't know what
• 48:11
  Speaker 8: this tree mean to me. This tree right here used
• 48:13
  Speaker 8: to be home base for hide and go seek?
• 48:17
  Speaker 9: Are you crying? You big? You crying too? Man? Look
• 48:21
  Speaker 9: at your dog. I ain't dog treat though, look at
• 48:23
  Speaker 9: wipe your eyes and the hell with you this tree
• 48:26
  Speaker 9: right now? I'm turning my you just meet me on
• 48:29
  Speaker 9: Clayton Street.
• 48:30
  Speaker 5: All right.
• 48:30
  Speaker 3: Let me tell you something. This tree used to be
• 48:33
  Speaker 3: first base for kickball.
• 48:34
  Speaker 7: Do you hear me?
• 48:36
  Speaker 5: Bo?
• 48:37
  Speaker 3: Dude?
• 48:37
  Speaker 9: I done told you once. I ain't tree. All right,
• 48:40
  Speaker 9: No hail around this dude.
• 48:42
  Speaker 8: Your name Lord, but you ain't a hell is cool jay?
• 48:48
  Speaker 3: And he wouldn't not he wouldn't not help come down
• 48:51
  Speaker 3: here and told up my mama tree here is not
• 48:53
  Speaker 3: that kind of person. But you, you lord?
• 48:56
  Speaker 9: Oh you crying for?
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: Man?
• 48:58
  Speaker 9: What crying for?
• 48:59
  Speaker 3: You messed up my mama treat?
• 49:01
  Speaker 9: You sound like a girl. I'm crying because my mama
• 49:04
  Speaker 9: tree broke.
• 49:05
  Speaker 3: Let me tell you something. Go round and bring you
• 49:08
  Speaker 3: down I.
• 49:09
  Speaker 9: Read that in ten minutes to meet your where's more
• 49:14
  Speaker 9: than me?
• 49:15
  Speaker 3: My uncles is here, my cousin is here, all up.
• 49:18
  Speaker 9: The braid of brunch family? What bring?
• 49:22
  Speaker 7: Bro?
• 49:23
  Speaker 9: I tell you what I tell right now. It's gonna
• 49:24
  Speaker 9: be hot water in this day.
• 49:27
  Speaker 8: Don't make me no different. They call you l l
• 49:29
  Speaker 8: my knock you out, and that's what you're finna get.
• 49:33
  Speaker 9: M that's come on, come on with it because I'm
• 49:36
  Speaker 9: here all right, No running.
• 49:40
  Speaker 3: Cool, don't make me listen right up. I'm finna tell
• 49:44
  Speaker 3: you one more thing about this tree? And you listening
• 49:47
  Speaker 3: to me? I'm listening, Bro, Is you listening?
• 49:50
  Speaker 9: I have told you what I don't give it about
• 49:52
  Speaker 9: that tree, But if you want to talk about it,
• 49:54
  Speaker 9: go ahead.
• 49:55
  Speaker 8: Let me tell you something. This is nephew Tommy from
• 49:57
  Speaker 8: the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
• 49:59
  Speaker 3: You just got prank by your boys JJ And.
• 50:02
  Speaker 9: Look, man, what did you gonna say?
• 50:06
  Speaker 8: This is his nephew tell me from the Steve Harvey
• 50:09
  Speaker 8: Morning Show.
• 50:10
  Speaker 3: You just got pranked by your boy.
• 50:14
  Speaker 9: You got to be kidding me.
• 50:16
  Speaker 8: Man, ain't no, ain't no tree messed up and you
• 50:23
  Speaker 8: ain't been on Clayton Street though. Oh man, you alright, don't, amen,
• 50:35
  Speaker 8: What is the baddest radio show.
• 50:38
  Speaker 3: In the land.
• 50:39
  Speaker 9: Steve Harvey Morning show MANE.
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: About to get it? You were about to get it.
• 50:47
  Speaker 3: Now come on right here as you climb for the
• 51:01
  Speaker 3: Brady Bush Huh.
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: I'm by myself.
• 51:11
  Speaker 3: Playing another one.
• 51:11
  Speaker 9: I don't give up.
• 51:14
  Speaker 3: I'm telling you you can do that. Damn Tree. I
• 51:18
  Speaker 3: told you I ain't been down. Claytontree today.
• 51:20
  Speaker 8: Wow, Friday, April the fifth, that would be April Fool's
• 51:24
  Speaker 8: Comedy Jam. Now stay whip me now because I'm going somewhere.
• 51:27
  Speaker 8: Brian Hooks in the building, Chantay Wayne's in the building,
• 51:32
  Speaker 8: London Brown in the building, Light and Love in the building,
• 51:37
  Speaker 8: Tory Hart in the building, Coco Brown, just hilarious.
• 51:40
  Speaker 3: Oh all, this is hosted by Rip Michaels. You got
• 51:43
  Speaker 3: Bruce Bruce in the building. You got d. L.
• 51:45
  Speaker 8: Hugley in the building. You got Tracy Morgan in the building. Nephew,
• 51:49
  Speaker 8: tell me in the building. It's all going down at
• 51:51
  Speaker 8: the Barclays Center, Brooklyn.
• 51:54
  Speaker 3: In the House, Brooklyn, New York.
• 51:55
  Speaker 8: That is Friday night, April fifth, April Fools Comedy Jam
• 51:59
  Speaker 8: tickets her own.
• 51:59
  Speaker 11: Seat writ Now that is wonderful. Net Thank you coming
• 52:04
  Speaker 11: up next, It's the Strawberry Letter. You're listening Hardy Morning Show.
• 52:10
  Speaker 10: A report by Zillo finds it nearly twenty two and
• 52:13
  Speaker 10: a half percent twenty two point five percent of US
• 52:16
  Speaker 10: millennials they are living with their mom, which is about
• 52:20
  Speaker 10: twelve million young adults.
• 52:23
  Speaker 3: And why haven't.
• 52:24
  Speaker 10: Millennials moved out on their own? Well, according to the report,
• 52:27
  Speaker 10: twelve percent of them are currently unemployed.
• 52:31
  Speaker 3: Now he got a job?
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: Does he live with you?
• 52:33
  Speaker 3: Yes? He does? Well when you live with your mom? Man,
• 52:36
  Speaker 3: you pass Millenna, like, I see.
• 52:39
  Speaker 11: What range is debt?
• 52:41
  Speaker 3: You should.
• 52:43
  Speaker 10: Since he has the most kids, I think we should
• 52:45
  Speaker 10: defer to Steve on this one. Steve, you have some
• 52:47
  Speaker 10: rules for when you live with someone until you get
• 52:49
  Speaker 10: on your feet.
• 52:51
  Speaker 2: Now, this is not for millennial anybody, say anybody okay,
• 52:56
  Speaker 2: So I don't want you to make that. I don't
• 52:58
  Speaker 2: want millennials to feel that way. This is for anybody.
• 53:01
  Speaker 2: You've had people stay at your how I have people
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: come live with me college, college roommates and stuff like that.
• 53:09
  Speaker 3: It's some stuff.
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: Now, these are Steve Harvey's rules for living with someone
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: til you get on your feet.
• 53:16
  Speaker 3: These are dudes and don'ts Okay, some things you need
• 53:20
  Speaker 3: to keep in mind. Here's one right here. Your goal
• 53:24
  Speaker 3: every day is.
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: To make it seem like you that but you note
• 53:35
  Speaker 2: that's your gold.
• 53:36
  Speaker 3: That's when you wake up get it in your mind.
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: You have to wait be here, what look like I.
• 53:46
  Speaker 3: Because you get asked to leave.
• 53:48
  Speaker 1: Now you don't want that.
• 53:50
  Speaker 2: Here's another one. This is very important. Your car should
• 53:56
  Speaker 2: never block me in.
• 54:00
  Speaker 9: Keep it on.
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: I can't want to go out, and I'll go out there,
• 54:03
  Speaker 2: and your car in the damn where you in that sleep?
• 54:08
  Speaker 2: In fact, I got news for your car. Shouldn't even
• 54:11
  Speaker 2: be in front of the house. Park up the street
• 54:16
  Speaker 2: and walk down to where you look.
• 54:18
  Speaker 3: At rent free round the corner.
• 54:23
  Speaker 2: Park at the up the street, at the parking lot,
• 54:27
  Speaker 2: at the grocery store.
• 54:30
  Speaker 3: That man.
• 54:31
  Speaker 2: Try to make it look like you ain't even got
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: no car. If you're watching TV in the other room. Yeah,
• 54:41
  Speaker 2: your laugh should not be where I can hear.
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: Lay down the just good bucket laugh.
• 54:56
  Speaker 3: This should be your laugh. Learn how to laugh like
• 54:58
  Speaker 3: this is. Let me show you how you laugh when
• 55:00
  Speaker 3: you are other people enjoying a TV and all this right?
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: What it is real funny kings of comedy.
• 55:12
  Speaker 11: That's gonna be hard.
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Steve, have put me.
• 55:19
  Speaker 3: I don't give a damn what you want.
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: You're listening.
• 55:25
  Speaker 11: Morning show.
• 55:28
  Speaker 10: All right, it's time for comedy.
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: Eleven jay now quickly.
• 55:32
  Speaker 3: It's very similar.
• 55:33
  Speaker 6: You guys test our ability to be comedians. Give us
• 55:37
  Speaker 6: five subjects.
• 55:38
  Speaker 3: Anything you want.
• 55:39
  Speaker 6: Let the wheel stop. We put it out on the
• 55:41
  Speaker 6: roulette wheel. Wherever you stop. We do a couple of
• 55:43
  Speaker 6: minutes on. That's how good we are, all right, that's
• 55:45
  Speaker 6: how good we are. All right, all right, we'll see
• 55:47
  Speaker 6: about that. We have five topics for you, all right.
• 55:50
  Speaker 7: Number one the movies. You got this one, though, Steve.
• 56:02
  Speaker 7: Number two being dumped, all right, that's on the wheel.
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: Number three, bed wedding, been there, I got that one.
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: Number four, bad grades.
• 56:12
  Speaker 10: Number five, When to shut up, cat spind the wheeldes
• 56:18
  Speaker 10: come on.
• 56:18
  Speaker 3: Bad Wait.
• 56:23
  Speaker 6: Week, I like movies, Steve, whoa, okay, okay, that's good
• 56:35
  Speaker 6: with okay, Way to shut up? When to shut up? Okay,
• 56:39
  Speaker 6: I'll tell you when you shut up the minute. Just
• 56:41
  Speaker 6: look in your rithual mirror and you see that blue light.
• 56:45
  Speaker 9: It is time.
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: I don't want time for you to shut up.
• 56:50
  Speaker 6: You make an announcement of everybody in the damn car
• 56:54
  Speaker 6: to shut the hell all right. We doesn't know that
• 56:58
  Speaker 6: there's gonna be one person, all right, the sober is one.
• 57:03
  Speaker 6: If they gotta lean from the back and talk. The
• 57:06
  Speaker 6: rest have been told to shut the hell up.
• 57:11
  Speaker 14: In that same lane, yes, that same length, in the neighborhood,
• 57:16
  Speaker 14: when you see somebody running from the law, when the
• 57:20
  Speaker 14: load look at us, We don't know nothing.
• 57:23
  Speaker 3: I had one fring on Poisay he went that way?
• 57:26
  Speaker 14: What did you telling them down?
• 57:27
  Speaker 3: Fuck? You already know he know? Uh.
• 57:31
  Speaker 14: Now you're sitting the laws the same way Darren went.
• 57:33
  Speaker 14: You could have pointed the other way.
• 57:35
  Speaker 3: That way he see us? You think he looking? Fuck?
• 57:38
  Speaker 3: You didn't see nothing.
• 57:39
  Speaker 4: Shut the hell up?
• 57:41
  Speaker 3: Got it? Well, I'm going another route. Let me just
• 57:48
  Speaker 3: do two quick ones. Okay, fellas, you know it's time
• 57:54
  Speaker 3: to shut up. When you're feeling guilty and you want
• 57:59
  Speaker 3: to confess what this moment you have, pardon, we're not
• 58:09
  Speaker 3: going in theything that. Let me tell you something.
• 58:13
  Speaker 2: When my first marriage, I went out one night, me
• 58:17
  Speaker 2: and my partner, you know, and you know I just
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: told told Max whatf I was going out?
• 58:23
  Speaker 3: Right, I'm over at the house.
• 58:26
  Speaker 2: A couple of days later, my partner Reggie, I went
• 58:29
  Speaker 2: to club with This is what he said. Hey, man,
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: tell your wife about the club we went.
• 58:40
  Speaker 3: You're looking at it.
• 58:41
  Speaker 10: Like what.
• 58:46
  Speaker 3: I just just something? You just go what are you
• 58:51
  Speaker 3: talking about? Yell? My wife got the club we went to.
• 59:00
  Speaker 3: You don't do that. I was supposed to tell you
• 59:02
  Speaker 3: shut up. That was supposed to do. I'll tell you
• 59:06
  Speaker 3: enough time to shut up.
• 59:08
  Speaker 14: It's a trick to when your mama say say something.
• 59:15
  Speaker 3: But then did you hear me what I supposed to do?
• 59:19
  Speaker 3: How am I gonna answer you?
• 59:20
  Speaker 14: I'm just supposed to be quiet, right, I'm just gonna
• 59:22
  Speaker 14: take my chiads on.
• 59:23
  Speaker 3: Shut the hell up, say something?
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: Say something else?
• 59:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, what fun? You got one? You got one?
• 59:30
  Speaker 11: God, When you on the phone.
• 59:32
  Speaker 3: With a woman and you hear her husband say, who
• 59:35
  Speaker 3: the hell are you talking to? Man? Shut your mon
• 59:47
  Speaker 3: hang up and block that number. Just shut up. Not
• 59:52
  Speaker 3: doing you as as as far as my mama.
• 59:57
  Speaker 8: When my mama say, I guess I'm lying, shut up?
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 3: Shut up? All right?
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 11: Sorry you guys, you're listening hard morning show.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 15: Few artists in the course of history have taken the
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 15: kind of creative risks that transform music and pop culture.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 3: Forever.
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 16: Her chart topping music continues to defy the norm, and
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 16: her groundbreaking to our spectacles.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 5: Have changed the game.
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 15: Now, on Monday, April First, Live on five, iHeart Radio
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 15: Music Awards will celebrate Beyoncey with the coveted Innovative Award.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 11: I definitely wanted to do things that were innovative.
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 16: Join us at the Dolby Theater in Hollywood, California.
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 15: Hard plus performances by Justin Timberlay, Green Day, Helc Shelley,
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 15: ro Laney Wilson, and Tate McCrae, and.
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 16: A very special musical tribute to the twenty twenty four
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 16: iHeartRadio Icon Award recipient, sh Witness music History.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 3: That's what we do.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 5: It's over.
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 16: Twenty twenty four iHeartRadio Music Awards hosted by Ludacris Monday
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 16: April first at eight seventh Central, Life only on Fox.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 10: All right, Yeah, the twenty twenty four iHeartRadio Awards are
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 10: going to be big.
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 11: You heard it.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 10: Beyonce will be in the building receiving the Innovator Award
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 10: back for it's eleven year. Our iHeartRadio Music Awards is
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 10: the only awards show that reflects the songs and artists
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 10: fans love. The twenty twenty four iHeart Music Awards will
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 10: be Monday, April first, eight pm, seventh Central on Fox
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 10: that is hosted by Luda Ludacris, Will Moses By, Yeah,
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 10: Justin Timberlake, TLC, Jelly Roll and Share will receive the
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 10: Icon Award, and Beyonce congratulations to her once again. We'll
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 10: receive the Innovator Award. We'll have more of the Steve
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 10: Harvey Morning Show coming up right after this.
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 1: You're listening.
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 11: Morning show, it's time out for a rounded? Would you rather?
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 11: Would you rather.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 10: Only be able to text using abbreviations or would you
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 10: rather only be able to text using emojis?
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 3: I can't call mean, it's gonna have to do emojis.
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 3: Them the abbreviations too much for me. I can't. I don't.
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: I don't know emojis mean, I ain't gonna do say
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 2: nothing to nobody. I don't know nothing about what the
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 2: one that's laughing means. I don't know what the little
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 2: one with the squinty eyes, what is that folk? I
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 2: don't know what the one with the little red on
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 2: their cheek as for what is that fault? I don't
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 2: know none of that man, I don't know what half
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 2: of face showing people sending me stuff up?
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 3: You going, man, I don't know what this mean. Dog
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 3: thrown asked me and texted me with emoji?
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 5: What is this?
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 3: This damn password puzzle? I don't know how to do
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 3: this here muscle love heart prey. What I can't read this?
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 5: Man?
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 3: A muscle of heart and prayer?
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, muscle heart pray.
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 3: I don't know how to read.
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 2: No, damn moji's man, My daughter Laurie was trying to dad. Dad,
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 2: just put any moji so we'll know you're not mad?
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 2: Why is all your texting cap? Why is I'm going
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: back and forth with this little letter, big letter, little
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 2: yelling at them, hies, I'm yelling and I'm texting.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 3: You don't know the tone? Muscle love heart pray, yeah,
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 3: heart prayer all right? And I damn sure. I can't
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 3: abbreviate because hell, I can't spell, so you ain't gonna
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 3: know what I'm talking about.
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 10: Would you rather marry the hottest person alive? Or would
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 10: you rather marry the smartest person alive?
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 7: You know?
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 10: Provided if you're not, If you're not, yeah, I'm married already,
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 10: you said hottest.
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're the hottest hot about you sitting up educating me.
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 2: I'm already know a little bit.
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 3: I need you to be fine, skip that super fine
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 3: to hear with you degrees. Yeah, I'm sitting up here
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 3: all this talking all afternoon. I'm I want to hear
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 3: all that I can have fine and stupid all day
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 3: long at well, yeah, I don't walk your fine dumb
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 3: man's about here. A couple more times.
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 11: I've had.
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 3: Your brilliant as always talking.
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 2: You know, see you've metaphorically you're not correcting your hypotheties.
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 11: I'm smart.
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 2: Hell yeah, call me and you ain't fine, no law,
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 2: give me that dumb finance deal. Let's hey, baby, listen
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 2: to me when we get in here.
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 3: Don't talk.
• 1:05:05
  Speaker 1: That's today's round.
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 3: Tell everybody you got the mumps.
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 10: Coming up in forty nine minutes after our last break
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 10: of the day, and we'll close out the show with
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 10: some closing.
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 11: Remarks from the one and only Steve Harvey.
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 4: Right after this.
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 11: You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show