Latest / The Steve Harvey Morning Show / Bitterman Roscoe W Concert, Argument Starter, Number of Friends, Comedy Roulette and more.

Transcript

Bitterman Roscoe W Concert, Argument Starter, Number of Friends, Comedy Roulette and more. · The Steve Harvey Morning Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Today's show is pre recorded. Y'all know what time? I
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: don't know. Y'all have a sun giving them like the
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: million bucks things. And as to good Steve hastening to mother,
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: Please I don't join Jo. You gotta use that turn
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: you're going to do? You are you gotta turn to
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: turn them out? Turn? You haven't got to turn them out?
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: Then turn the water the water got me? Come come
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: on your tha uh huh, I show will a good
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: morning everybody. You all listening to the voice, come on
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: dig me now, one and only Steve Harvey Man got
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: a radio show. How good is God? Hum? Think about it?
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: Just take a slight inventory of your own life and
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: say it to yourself when you get through, how good
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: is God? Think of all the small things, all this
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: because that's him. You breatheh that's him. You steal him.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: That's him. You got another chance? That's him. You ain't
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: out of him. That's him. You got any measure of health,
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: that's him. You think it's more to it than it
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: really is, that it already showed up to be. That's him.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: All of that. You got any dreams of aspirations, you
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: dream of other things, that's him. All that that's him.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: That's him him close you got, that's him every time
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: you eat. That's why they had this thing called you
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: say your grace. That's him. That's him, man, that's him.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: It's amazing when you take a small inventory how you
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: find out how big God really is in your life. Now,
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: the more you turn yourself over to him, the bigger
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: he can be. For you. See, he'll only be as
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: big as you let him. It's one thing about God. Now,
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: he's a gentleman. He can make you do anything. You know.
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: You get too big for him, you know you you you,
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: you lose your humbleness. He can humble you. Now. God
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: created man with the power of choice. We're the only
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: creature he created that. He gave us the total power
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: of choice when we mate, who we mate with. You
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: know everything, all of it. Man. It's the choice what
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: we want to be, how much we want to make,
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: where we want to live, what climate we want to
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: live in. We can live in cold climates, hot climates.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: You know, we speak different languages. You can go learn
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: another language. A bear can't do nothing but be a bear.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: Is he can't go learn how to be a fox.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: He can't go learn how to be an otter. He
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: just can't. An ostrich is an ostrich man. He can't
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: come out of here and fight like a lion. A
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: lion is a lion. A lion eat meat. He can't
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: eat vegetables. I don't care how much meat ain't around.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: He'll lay down and pull up out of here and
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: die because he can't eat grass. He's just a lion man.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: You understand this that God gave us. We are the
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: one creature he created that has total power of choice.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: You can make every decision in your life. What kind
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: of watch you like? That's the one you can buy.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: You want to live in Switzerland, Go ahead. You don't
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: like Switzerland, you move to Miami. You want to live
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: your life a crime, Go ahead, that's you. He gave
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: you the power of choice. You want to do right?
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: Come on, So now look at this thing. We are
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: all the results of a series of decisions that we
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: have made. If we could just identify that the problem
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: is us, we could began the solution. See that's the problem, y'all,
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: it's us. It's what we do. I threw my life
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: down the hill. I can't tell you how many years
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: based on some decisions that I was making. Now I
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: can justify my decision with I wasn't happy and I
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: was doing this and I was in miserying y'all on
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: that ye yes to you when you get through. You
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: made the decisions though, and you can look at this
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: anywhere you want to, y'all. But at the end of
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: the day, I'm just talking to people that's really really
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: wanting to improve their position in life. And how do
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: you do that? You got to have a solution. How
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: do you come up with a solution? You got to
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: identify the problem to even began to solve it. But
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: if the problem ain't ever you, how are you gonna
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: solve something that ain't you? See? Okay, let me look
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: at this one. If somebody said, like, I got a
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: child of mine, man, I just do right here. Man,
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: I don't even wanna get into it this morning, or
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: I'm struggling with this this boy. But man, you go
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: to people, you're asking why they do so? I just
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: I just wasn't taking care of business. Why I just
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: didn't take care of business? Boy, do you understand that
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: your life is gonna be filled with you got to
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: take care of business. So when you're gonna start, you know,
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: what I mean. You can't. You can't. You can't go
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: through life blaming everybody. It's got to be you. See,
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: you can fix you. You can't fix nobody else if
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: you keep getting married and the marriages don't work. Hello, Hello, Hello?
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: Could it be you? South finally had to sit down
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: and just make that decision. They don't need to be
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: coming on the radio talking about nobody else and what
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: they did to me and y'all just don't know. No, no, no, man,
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: what about the part you played in it? Because see,
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: if you got a good marriage, you got a part
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: to play in that. If you got a bad one,
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: you got a part to play in that. Even if
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: it just get down to you the one pick them,
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: how about that? Mister? Mister? I made a decision. The
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: problem is usually within yourself. Do you know That's the quickest,
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: an easy way to fix your life. That way, you
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: ain't got to check with nobody. Here's the beauty of
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: going on and admitting that is you. You don't have
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: to check or clear with nobody to start the repair process.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: You don't need anybody's permission. You ain't got to put
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: it before the review board to see if it'll pass.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: It ain't got to go through Congress. You ain't got
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: to hope that your local politician get their hands on
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: it to make a phone call for you. You ain't
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: got to ask any counselors to come in and sit
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: with you. You don't have to check it in the rehab.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: All you got to do is decide the problem is me.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna start changing. Identify the problem, and start with
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: the part that you can own up to. Once you
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: identify the problem, you can start planning on how to
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: fix it or how to get to accomplishing something. But
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: remember this planning is important. If you fail to plan,
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: then please plan to fail. If you don't know how
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: to make a plan, let's just start with the basics.
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: Just make a list of what you want. Make this
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: list and then go to God in prayer with an
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: open mind and open your mind up to all the
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: clean opportunities that are available here. Why a lot of
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: people won't succeed because certain opportunities come along you don't
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: want to do them. That kills me. Man, when I
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: hear here, I ain't doing that. I know young comedians
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: that come to me all the time talking about man,
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: what you're not saying, Man, just take every gig you can,
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: no matter what they pay. Well, listen to me, son,
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: you can go make that money that they pay, or
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: you can make the decision to sit at home and
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: make nobodey. It's a comedy, hard business. They ain't paying
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: but one hundred dollars. You gotta drive, drive fifty miles.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: But if you drive fifty miles and you make the
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: hundred and you stand on that stage for thirty minutes,
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: you are now thirty minutes better than you was the
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: last time you went on stage. Ah, Man, I ain't man,
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: they don't pay me, I ain't coming. You ain't gonna
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: be a comedian, man, not not, not like this. Hell,
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: A lot of people just don't want to do what's
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: necessary to do. So when the opportunity presents itself and
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: you open up your mind to it, man, then get
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: ready to go on and do it. Man, identify your
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: problem today. Start with the part dash you you're listening
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: to show ladies and gentlemen without further dude, it is time.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: It's moaning time. Come on, we gather today six o'clock
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: or so. M hm. That's right. With uh intentions of
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: eye lightening intentions of UH comma comma deicalness. We come
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: to you with intention informatization. We are healed in the
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: moaning time, in spite of the crisis that's going on
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: around the world. We that are here are blessed and
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: highly favored. Right walking, that walk, yes, talking that talk yeah,
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: and jay walking when I walk. Sermons ain't gotta have
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: no meaning. They just got to sound like his wom
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: I say, look at hill, welcome, or to the bad
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: is molding shot you lay? I know there as others,
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: but then his invitations. I know folks with reggio shows, yeah,
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: but they ain't got us on it. I know of
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: some shows. I think it's pretty good. My damn seld
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: a radio and I had turned to one station, Come on,
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: I would pick the same one that you just picked. Yeah,
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: I know you picked it because I'm on it and
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: you hear me. Like I said, other choices, But why
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: make the wrong choice every day? That's right, that's right.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: Knowing that we are healed and they are there. Come
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: on now, ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce him to you.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: A man with a large note, great big old limps.
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: Mr Face has grown in with over the years. Mustache,
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: world famous got more more credits, uh than than Equifax Cranny.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: He he has told more jokes than these other Ain'tio
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: shows have attempted. Yes, ain't nobody on any Morning Moon
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: funny didn't be. And when I come back, I'm gonna
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: introduce me to you and the rest of the morning crew.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: There are you just standing by? But I then took
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: off down the road of foolishness, and I didn't know
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: how to get off. Sometime when you go down the
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: road of foolishness, it ain't no exit. So we on
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: the road and I'll be back at the bottom of
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: the hour in the name or the Steve Harvin Moan
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: and Show. We'll be right back right you're listening right now,
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: It's time for the nephew to run that brank back.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: My dog, Apolo, let's go catch down. Hello, Hello, hey man,
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: my name Virgil. Uh? Who who is this right here?
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: Who is who is it you're speaking to? Marcus? What's
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: going on? Okay, marcauts, let me ask you something. Man. Y'all, y'all,
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: y'all aren't messed up. Y'all, y'all didn't got Apolo arrested
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: last night on some trumped up charges. Man hold on,
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: I'm lost here. What what what is this you're talking about?
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: You got a Polo arrested last night on some trumped
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: up charges. Whola bla bla bloa. Whoa sure you got
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: it right now? No, man, y'all you and you and
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: at you and at you and atenc Yeah okay this
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: atc No tim, Now what is this about Apolo? Who
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: is Apolo? I don't I don't know what you're talking about.
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: You got, y'all, got a Polo arrested last night on
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: some trumped up charges. You know not he down town
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: and and and and if there is somebody pressing charges.
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: So now I got to figure out how we're gonna
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna get Apolo out of jail. Hold on, you come, man,
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: I need calls. Go down town ain't going in so
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: Apolo can come home. Fum the brakes. Boss, Listen to
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: what you're saying. Now? Are you calling me about somebody
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: that I don't even know? I ain't even I don't know,
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: No Apolo, you know your I apologize for your home
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: boy and and and everything that's going down, But I
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: don't know nobody name Apollo. I really don't know. I
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: don't know what you're talking about. So you know, y'all, y'all,
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: y'all ain't called the police last night. Ain't nobody calling
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: no police. You you ain't called You're gonna sit here
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: in line to me and tell me you ain't called
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: no police last night. Let's take this back. Now. Now
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: what's your name? Man? My name is Virgil. And now
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: now how you come about getting my nuther? Don't wonder
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: about how I got you? No, my guy? Are you
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: the one? I know? You? The one got Apollo arrested
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: on these trump up charges? Don't work? Not home? How
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: do you know? How do you know where I live?
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: Because I live a boy of you? I live in
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: nineteen c nineteen s nineteen so or you're the one
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: that got the louns balking dog? All I was a hello,
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: My dog is Apolo, my god, Apollo. Man, you got
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: me thinking that you're talking about some human being. You
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: sitting here calling me about something animal, something rested my
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: last man. First of all, charge no ever deally you
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: press in charge. Hey listened to get my dog out
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: of jail? Man? And the thenly you need to listen
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: to what you're talking about. Man. You calling me about
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: some animal Listen, we called the front desks people about disturbance.
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: Every time we look around, we hear your dog, So
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: you might need it to take it over with whoever
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: that's in charge with the apartment complex, because that's who
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: we inform about your loud dog. And now you know
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: you calling me. How you got my name, I don't know,
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: but you need to check this out and and talk
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: with the people that's in charge of the apartment complex.
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: I'm taking it up with the person that the file
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: to complaint and got my dog arrested last night. Now
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: my dog down now on some Trump really charge really
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: really didn't even read We didn't even read Apolo his
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: right for nothing like that. Really, you really talking this?
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: Listen what you're saying dogs man? And it's all let's
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: call to you man. I think you need to uh,
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: you need some counseling in something else because you're talking
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: about a dog. How can a dog get arrested? You
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: need to uh, this is crazy. Listen. I don't think
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: we got anything else to talk about, man, because then
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: we got we got to talk about a polo. Man,
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: How how you gonna go down? I didn't get him
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: out of jail. And you need to have him been
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: here back to body this evening. I ain't even to
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: go through this without my dog being here. This man
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: sounds crazy. Baby, this man calling me about a dog
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: being arrested. This is the dog that be balking. It's
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: a Pololo man apoloism as a family member, and you
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: have got him arrested. Man football, what and man? Why
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: would you do something like that? Man? How about this
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: you and that dog. Don't be calling me no more
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: talking to me about some dog that I ain't got
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: no control over. You need to take this over the
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: police on whoever called? Ain't nobody calling the police. Did
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: you just say, Polo man? Listen? Did you just say
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: that you heard what I said? Okay, Okay, hey man,
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: I'm not trying to argue. Okay, look look, let's let's
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: just let's just do this here. Is it any way
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: you could just come down there with me this evening
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: and drop the charge. Come down, well, come to the
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: police station. Man, Well Polo went dog dog? He doesn't listen? Listen, Okay,
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: I'm not trying to hollow he down there on some
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: trump up charge. You can't pick him out in the
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: lineup if you want follow clean. They got no friend.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: I can't. Man, listen, man, do you really hear what
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: you're saying? Now? I know they say, man, best friend
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: is a dog, but you're taking this a little bit
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: too far now. You need to really listen to what
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: you're talking about. You did all this, what you got
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: a problem with this at the front desk and the police?
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: If you got your dog just really don't make any
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: sense right now to me. Now, I apologize once again
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: about your dog, but I think we have our business finished,
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: right man, because I tell you something. Let me tell
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: you something. I'm gonna tell you this right here, Okay,
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: monkers right yeah, okay, let me tell you this here.
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: You're trying to testify against trying to testify against against
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: Apolo see whateverver. But in the way you listen, man,
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you like this, you Apolo, anything else
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: that you got to say about this situation right here.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: You found my number, you found you know where I live.
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: You just come see me. You really want that. I'm
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: about to be through with this phone call. Man, I'll
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: tell you what. I'll tell you what. Let me say
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: this right here. I'm gonna say this right here to
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: you try to try to try to get on the
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: stand and testify against Apolo. And I promise you dog,
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: you're gonna have some problems on your hands. You listen,
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: you really talk to them some nonsense right now? Do
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: you really hit what you're saying to me? Apolo is
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: a dog? I know he a dog? He my dog?
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: You know what I tell you? What? Hey? Man? How
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: did how did pretty little wife for you? Is doom
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: when it be at home while you're gonna work all day?
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: Just say to me, how is that pretty little wife
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: for you that be gone? That be at home when
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: you're gonna what's your what's your name? A rich told
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: you my name? Versa this nineteen see where you are right?
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: Please please believe that's what we're about to meet right now,
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: because now in nare's gonna come up here talking to
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: me about my wife. So if it's any other dog
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: you got up in the place, please believe that dog
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: is gonna get right along with your Okay, I got
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: one more to say to me because you ain't a
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: little too far lynd with me and a dog. Now
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: you're trying to talk about what's going on in my
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: household and my wife. Please believe nineteenth is where you
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: about to find me. Let me tell you who else
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: up here in nineteen seats waiting on me all I'm
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: about to get who else is all up in nineteen Okay,
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: let me tell you who else is here? You want
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: to know who else in here? Man, I'm gonna tell
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: you this here nephew Thommy from the Steve Harbin Morning Show.
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: He's up in here in nineteenth safan, What the hell nephew?
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: This nephew Tommy? God man, you got me cousin and
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: my Mom'm gonna be listening to this station. Your neighbor
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: Gerald got thank you about the neighbor town saying, oh man, hey, man,
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: you gotta tell me this baby. What's the baddest radio
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: station in the land, The Steve Harving Morning Show? And
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: nephew time is crazy? All right? Thank you? You're listening?
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: All right, guys, it is time for something funny. I
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: know you got it. I know I'm ready. Man. I
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: was listening to my elsome old LTD this weekend. Steve Man, boy,
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: who you know you boot me? I forgot how bad
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: they were, man. I was bad. Dog dog thought, Oh
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: your love this man, feeling fa your touch, Your touch
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: has grown cold? Seeing someone else controls your very soul.
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: I'm fooled down. Harden as long as I can, I
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: can feel the presence or another man haking my place.
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: You would stay just you watch me do drift away
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: from Lige with thing, can't stop the huding, leaving on
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: the run, taking awful Grahamy like you the only ones
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: I know what you through? Pan anytime to carry on?
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: So minute by minute by minute by I keep holding on. Man.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: Who else say somebody? Oh James j Lee think you anyway? Anyway?
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: I do? Just say man, sag las show baby because
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: so let's sid pass it by Gavin to make you cry.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: See the man with the bru huh you see that
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: he is sad? Oh so sad, so bad, so bad,
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: so bad? Come on, oh, intruders away my ma. She's
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: my favorite girl. Only get one? You only get one? Yeah,
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: all always love my mama. She brought me in this world,
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: certainly talking about myma. Come on, come on, I want
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: to know your name? Ye who stay hung to one over? Baby? Man,
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: I really want to be with you about waiting got
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: verse two cor s that can't be batch if you
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: don't do another dope another that the way you go.
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: Don't out thing a down name now with down name
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: now taking the right Harold Melbourn and the blue nose.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: Come on, see, Oh you don't know me now you
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: never know me who I've been here all the things? Yeah,
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: it is that we've been read through. Miss baby, I've
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: gotten mine and woman know you got your shoe? What
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: what about this right here? Oh the greatest Yes, sir,
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: miss you, sir, miss you, miss you, miss you, miss you?
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: Was that baby that's Harold Melbourne. Girl, I know shoot
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: the body that I just can't live without you. And
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: that's why I'm confessing my love to you. Baby? Who else?
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: Who else? You didn't do the dramatics? Ye wait, now
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: you gave you roll at all? Nobody knows. And he
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: wasn't true. He tried listen to this sweet than you.
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: I never sweet up my shot set him on the
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: wilcos change always know what the girl could never. So
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: now he's trying hard to get you back. But you
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: know the fool's hearts made of cell fane. You can
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: see through that. When he had your loves and the
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: palms of his hands, he just wasn't sentence man, I
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: show He jibbed and gnada, he hand, I have another
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: call right that by yourself. Oh, let's give a to
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: give to give a toes to the fool who lets
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: you go, who lets you go? You can't hurt you
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: no more, no, no no, the fool to the fool
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: who lets you go? Who lets you go? Now we
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: went together your normal. Let's have another one. I make
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: you drive that music, make you drive cross country when
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: you got good music. Let me tell you it'll make
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: you dry a cross country for a reason. Yes, listen,
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: that's we got to keep that in the show. That's
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: you're listening to. All right, guys, here's a question. What
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: product or what brand reminds you of your childhood home?
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: All right, here's an email from Tea from New Orleans.
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: It says, Hey, morning crew. Every time I see the
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: Quaker oat meal bottle the box, I think of my
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: mom's house when I was a kid. She always had
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: a box of it on top of our refrigerator. When
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: I go to visit my pop's house, he always had
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: a box of frosted Flakes frosted Flakes cereal in his pantry.
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: In fact, uh, he probably does right now with Brander product.
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: Did your childhood home always have in stock. I got
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: a bunch of I knew it ready for me. What like,
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: what steve you go first? Comment comment? Yea, yes, a
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: green asshole can a comment with the peel off top
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: with the eight holes in the top. Yeah, then and
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: washed all your sinks in your bathtub out. But let
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: it sit though, Let it sit for a minute. Yeah,
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: changed color. Ain't opened up refrigerator while seeing an open
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: box of arm and hammer baker so yeah yeah yeah,
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: yea sitting stove that matchwell or folders coffee can with
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: the grease. Yes, yes, it's real thick memories. Yeah yeah.
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: In the in the bathroom crash toothpaste, Oh oh you
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: were cresspeople. No, we wasn't really cresh Yeah yeah we
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: had that too. We we was whatever was on sale
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: people though, ultra brightness. I thought that was just the
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: greatest thing. Go ahead, if if we ran out of
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: that toothpaste, then we go to that fridge with that
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: bacon soda wood and going in get yeah yeah, and
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: dip that tooth Yeah. I actually brushed my teeth better
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: with bacons. Hello. Yeah, yeah, all right, how about this
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: come tide laundry detergent time tied to have some time.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: Ivory's ain't that liquid? That's washing powder? We have that, right,
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: faun in the big blue box. Damn fair, But you didn't.
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: Did you have ivory soap though? Did you have ivory
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: soap to take your bath? Die? Die die? We had
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: we had ivory soap. Yeah, it floated in the water ivory. Yeah. Okay,
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: let's go in the bathroom and up underneath that counter.
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: It's a little red crip can, got some grease in
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: it called royal crown. Huh what all your scalp with
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: that right there? Yeah, that's how I got my hands.
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: We're in the bathroom. We're in the bathroom. Yeah, yeah,
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: we're in the bathroom. Scott single ply Shet. You had
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: to be careful wiping yourself with that damn single plot. Man.
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: I can't tell you how many times I misjudged it
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: and pushed my frangle. Okay, yeah, we got it. Yeah,
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: we got single single plot. My daddy loved that. Boy.
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: You get a thousand sheets? Yeah yeah? Oh wait, do
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: y'all remember aim aim two pages to strip? Yeah, yeah,
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: we strike gleam uh huh. I got on that bottle
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: that hung on the back of the door. Looked like
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: a hot water bottle with the tube on it and
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: a spring. Boy, me my nephew got to ask whooping
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: our life? One time, we feel that my mama had
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: went and we found it on the back of the door.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: We'd always wondered what it was, so we put water
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: in it, and we found out that it's that the
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: water squeezed through them little holes on that white timp.
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: So we're chasing each other around the house water hurting
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: each other. Okay, then he fill up the bag and
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: it was my time to have and then he have
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: it under his arm. My mama came in that house.
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: My mama said, it's all this vinegar in him. Now,
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: we didn't even know. We didn't know nothing about no
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: vinegar smell. She said, what is all this vinegar I
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: smelled in this house? Now we saw them out, Oh
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: that ain't not as cool. We were sweating water. Well,
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: we sat there. My mama got to do in the
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: mouth and went back in now and touched that hot
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: water bottle with the holes on it, and boy, we
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: got ee as And then so we didn't even know
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: why we got beat. And then my brother was talking
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: to us. Hey man, yeah, let me ask you something, Steve,
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: what is in that? Grandmama was water bottle from the baby? Said, nah,
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: we was playing water gun with it. He said, well
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: you know what that act? Right? Yeah, I don't know
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: what it is. When he said, that's a lady's bag.
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: And then I said, I don't what what what? Because
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: I'm clueless what you mean it's a lady's bag. That's
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: a douche bag. Still, I'm clueless. Boy. When my damn
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: brother told me what that bag was, man, I'm shooting
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: water in my mouth. I'm fired, full blast. I got
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: the bag under my arm, mouth wide over. That's what
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: I said. That's when I first found out I want
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: a little tangy now, oh my god, because you know,
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: because you know, they had a special solution. They put
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: it in you put Vinig in it too, and that's
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: we know. And I had no idea. All Right, we're
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: moving on. Thank you. You're listening to show, all right, Steve,
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: We're gonna try to make people laugh during this segment
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: with another quick fast round of asked the clo uh,
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: please submit your questions. Okay, so do you want me
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: to go for laughter answers or help people give it
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: to me? Now? Well, they were, can you do you
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: do that all the time? All right? Here we go them,
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: I thought you were asking. I was asking you what
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: you already know? How? Yeah, it is answers. Here we go.
• 35:58
  Speaker 1: This is this one. This one is Lisa in Oklahoma.
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: I'm a twenty three year old woman. I recently got
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: married a week after my virtual college graduation. My husband
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: and I were virgins when we got married, but we
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: love making love now. I just have one problem. My
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: husband loves to have sex early in the morning. That
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: was great during quarantine, but now I'm back at work
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: and the sex makes me late for work. I heard
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: about doing quickies, but my husband can't do those. I'm
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: new to all of this, so how do I tell
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: him know when he wants sex in the morning. He
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: don't really want sex in the morning. What he want
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: to do, it's just a natural occurrence in the morning.
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: That ain't sex, that's just early morning. It happened. We
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: just up, we are, we are, you are, I'm we
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: are what we're gonna do And he don't really want sex.
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: He don't know yet. Because if you say he was
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: a virgin, which happened twenty three, yeah, well he wasn't
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: but anyway up, he lyned up? What boy no listening
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: to me? That ain't that ain't no problem. Y'all having
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: sex and can't go to work on turn? That ain't
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: no damn problem. She twenty three. That ain't no problem.
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: Say no, it's your body? What is we're tripping phone?
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: He but he can't say no to his body though.
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: It's what I'm fine to morning occurrence that happens with
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: men up to a certain age, and he can't help it.
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: Just get your ass up, foe, heat up and go
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: to work. You're gonna lose your job before up? All right?
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: Next Ye in Atlanta says, I'm a twenty nine year
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: old female. My boyfriend is thirty two. We've been together
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: three years. He's changed over the years, and it's a
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: lot less sociable now. Uh. He says he's in love
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: with me, but I don't feel it. I post pictures
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: of us on my social media pages, but he won't
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: post any pictures of me on or us on his page.
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: He told me he keeps his private life private, but
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: if he hangs out with his female friends, he posts
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: group pictures of them. Am I being too patty? Or
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: do you think he has something to hide. Yeah, he
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: don't care for you no more. Damn, it's three years.
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: He's changed his attitude and change. He don't care for you.
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: And he got female friends he posted, but there ain't
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: no pictures of you. Do the math one and one
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: is two. You ain't in nothing but choe picture. That's one.
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: He and all his girlfriends pictures And why do he
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: hair girl friends? All right? Coming out more of the
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show right after this. You're listening Steve
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. All right, Steve our very own Jay
• 38:45
  Speaker 1: Anthony Brown is always here with the foolishness. Can count
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: on him. He's got the tails on his brand new book,
• 38:51
  Speaker 1: tell us about it. Just finished my new book, Steve,
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: and it's called one hundred and one Ways to Start
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: an Argument. Several chapters in the book. Um chapter one,
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: you know, laugh on the phone for no reason, just
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: just laugh. Yeah, it would start an argument. Yeah, yeah,
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: yeah yeah. His chapter chapter seven is a real good chapter.
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: Take a shower in the middle of the day, just
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: just showering. Yeah, where you going showering? That's am on Sunday.
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: This is a good one for Sunday. Say say I'm
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: going to a different church by myself. That's what you
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: say on Sam's Gonna be on. Ways to start an argument, Yeah,
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: put an empty bag in the closet and just walk away.
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: Just put it up and just walk away. Yeah, what's
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: on there? Don't worry about that. Don't go up there.
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: Don't go up there. It's what you mean. Don't go
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: up there. Don't go up there, don't go up there.
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: All right, Ways to start the arguments, say the phrase
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: right here. This really works. Say I'll be right back
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: and leave, just leave, just leave. Where are you going,
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: I'll be right back. Don't worry about when I'm going.
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: I'll be right back. You mean, no weary about it? Yeah,
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: just out of what you just pray right here on
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: the phone. This really gets an argument. Say good job, Beckett,
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: I'll see you tomorrow. And up the phone, Becky with
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: the good hair back? Why the hair you got to
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: encourage Becky? Damn good job Beckett? Where she do so?
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: Where your black starts to be? Commenting on it? A
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: book How to start an argument as your mate, your lady,
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: when's U? Where's your friend coming over here? You know
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: when she ain't been wish come here? Oh? Oh no, yeah,
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: that started argument of m Yeah, he's a pretty good jay. Argument. Yeah.
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: Ways to started argument. No matter what movie she says
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: she want to go to, you say, oh, I seen
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: it already. I oh you're you're going the movies now,
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: okay to see Yeah, I've seen that. Let's I've seen that.
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: I've seen it. I seen it. Here's another one. Here's
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: another one. Ways to start an argument. You own the
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: phone and you laugh real damn loud, and then you
• 41:51
  Speaker 1: start whispering. Boy, and this is why he's divorced. Jake,
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: you know how to run somebody? All you give me one,
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: give me one. I put it in the book. Buy
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: your wife some running shoes. Wow far color? Yeah, man, yeah,
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: by some running shoes that do it. Yeah. All of
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: a sudden, All of a sudden, in the middle of
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: the day, you put on a clean shirt. You woke
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: up in one shirt and put on another. What you
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: change your shirts for? Cannot just put on a new shirt? Now? No, No,
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: you cannot. What's wrong with all? Can just go with
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: the book, Jake? I just had one moment, last one moment?
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: You ready? Yeah? Come on? He started argument in your house? Guarantee?
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: Come on? What come in from work and pull your
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: pants off and ain't got no draws? All right, thanks
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: Jay and Steve. You just command up next with today's
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: today's brank phone call. Right after that, you're listening to
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: morning show coming up at the top of the hour.
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: Right about four minutes after, it's my strawberry letter for today,
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: subject he stole my heart and a few other things. Okay, first,
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: if you're gonna steal man right first of you, Tommy
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: is here, you here right there with today's praying phone call.
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: What you got for his nap? Me and your baby
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: getting married? Me and your baby getting married? Did you call?
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: I called this man and told him that I'm married
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: his daughter, Me and your baby might be a bit
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: too much. It's getting married. Let's run that thing. Hello, Hello,
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to reach I'm trying to reach mister. Yes, mister,
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: how you doing. I'm trying. Let me let me make
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: you I'm calling the right person. Your daughter is Crystal? Yes, okay, cool, yo,
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: I got the right person. Hey, listen, Well, I wanted
• 44:43
  Speaker 1: to do mister Richards's call and introduce myself to you
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: and let you know who I was. My name is Jeff, Jeff,
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: and I've been uh seeing Crystal, uh, you know, pretty
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: much like the last five or six months, and I
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: wanted to, um, let you know that I'm very very
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: interested in you. And I know this kind of crazy
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: for you to get a phone call for me when
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: I'm very interested in Crystal right now. And I wanted to,
• 45:12
  Speaker 1: you know, I just wanted to do the man thing
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: and just reach out to your man and say I'm
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: really interested in and uh in marrying your daughter and
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: marrying my daughter. Well, hold on, man, what my name is, Jeff? Jeff? Okay, Jeff, Jeff, listen.
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: I'm very close with my daughter, and my daughter has
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: never ever mentioned you. I talked to my daughter every day. Wow,
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: I don't know what that's about. What it's been like
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: about five close to six months that me and Cristal
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: being you know, going out, you know, up here at
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: the school. But what I wanted to do is tell
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: you that I really really really like Crystal man. Uh,
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: And I wanted to call and tell you that, you know,
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: I'm really really interested in man, Crystal. You know, I want,
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: I really do want Christa to be my wife. Well,
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: I again, I've never heard of you before, and my
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: daughter has never ever mentioned you. My daughter isn't dating
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: anybody right now. My daughter is in grad school. I
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: understand that. And you know, we you know, it's been
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: you know, we've been you know, a little back and
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: forth or whatever. But you know, the main thing is
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: me and Christal really, you know, we really, we really
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: do love each other. Mister. I want to but if
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: you love my daughter, she would have told me that
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: she was in love with someone. Well, you know what
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: you know, And maybe it's a situation where Christa is
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: like a little maybe a little uneasy about talking to
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: you about it. You know what I'm saying. My daughter
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: can talk to me about anything. We talk every day,
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: right right, You're like you, I talked to my daughter
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: every day, your daughter? And how old is your daughter?
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: My daughter? Fifteen? Hold on, momnute man, you say your
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: daughter was fifteen, right right? Right? Okay? Well how old
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: are you? I'm forty six, forty six, you're forty six
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: years old? You want to marn my twenty five year
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: old daughter? He let me say this right here. Love
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: ain't got no limit, man, And I understand, you know,
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: I was a little shocked at first about the age
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: difference between us, but you get you know what, man,
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: I'm shocked to me, okay, and I understand that. But
• 47:24
  Speaker 1: what I'm trying to explain to you, man, is that
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: it comes a time man when you just you just
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: don't know what's gonna happen. Man. Love just love is love, man,
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: And you've been locked up on parole at the university
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: on work releasing that my daughter. Yeah, man, I'm I'm
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: gonna say this, man, Christal is just a beautiful person. Man.
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: Hold on, man, you calling me at the Blue Daughter. Look, man,
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: I'm never worked. I got a lot of work on
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: my damn desk and you calling me telling me you
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: form a gentle bird wants to marry my daughter, my
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: twenty five year old daughter and you damn that fifty you,
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: I mean my age, you want to marry my daughter. Man,
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: I'm not trying to talk to you. But what I
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: need to do is I need to talk to Crystal
• 48:05
  Speaker 1: and get to the bottom of this. That's what the
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: hell I need to do. Hey, And I understand that
• 48:10
  Speaker 1: miss you was probably gonna I want to talk to
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: and I ain't got no problem with it. What I'm
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: trying to explain to you is that man, littve ain't
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: got no limit, man, It's just something that album Crystal
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: love Me, I love huh and it is what it is.
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to try to get your blessings on this.
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: You can't get sill. Man, gonna marry my daughter? No,
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: my daughter's been a private school. I love damn life.
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: She's going all four years of college and she's going
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: to grad school and you're gonna marry my daughter. You're working, miss.
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: I understand that. What I'm what I'm trying to explain
• 48:45
  Speaker 1: to you that you know what, man, Sometimes I love
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: is right the second time around, you understand what I'm saying.
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: What the hell you mean the second time? I got
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: kids already. What I'm trying to say, it didn't work
• 48:56
  Speaker 1: out with me on the first time. What I wanted
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: to do, man, is just called you solidified the culinary experience,
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: got to doing food. What the hell is you talking
• 49:07
  Speaker 1: about it? Look? Look, look, look, look, I gotta talk
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: to my daughter. I'm gonna call Crystal and I'm gonna
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: find out what the hell is going on, because look, man,
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: I'm not even trying to have this conversation with you,
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: and I comp understand all that. I understand what you're saying.
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: What I want to say to you is just right here.
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: Crystal is twenty five. Even if you don't agree with this, here,
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: we're gonna eat Lowe and make sure that we can
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: look at him. You ain't doing a thing with my
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: daughter unless it's mine. You look here, man, you ain't
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: doing I don't even know your jail bird. You ain't doing.
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna call my daughter final. You really are rust
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: your mind. You think your old jail bird, it's gonna
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: be Larry and my daughter. My daughter's not a future.
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: You ain't got the head. That's wrong with jil rust.
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say it. Go. I can fall with you. Miss.
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: Me and Crystal getting married. That will not happen under
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: any circumstances, not what you think. The circumstances are me
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: and Crystal getting married. That's it, not to love. I
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: don't know what the hell you think you are. As
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: long as you don't, it's gotta be. I got one
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: more thing I need to say, and then me and
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: Crystal just gonna come over there and dry down there
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: and tell you exactly what's going on in our life.
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: Right now. You got to say to me, are you
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: listening to me. Yes, you got to say to me.
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: I got to say this. This is nephew Tommy from
• 50:34
  Speaker 1: the Steve Harby Morning Show. You just got pranked by
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: your daughter Crystal and her boyfriend. Ain't I'm outside my job.
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: Let me I'm crazy, John, and man, your baby girl
• 50:59
  Speaker 1: just wanted to put a smile on your face. Man,
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: I gotta ask you, what is what is the baddest
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: and I mean the baddest radio show in the land, man,
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: the Steam Harvey Morning shuff That's how you do it? Baby?
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: Oh lord, oh man, not having it that take your
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: daddy through somebody's little girl right now, he said, my
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: fifteen year old yo, what you know? You know the
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: second the second time around? You know what I mean
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: the second time around? What you talking about? Love is love? Yeah?
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: Cause you have daughters. Yea, Oh my god. That's how
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: you do it. Baby. Go to Thomas Smiles dot com.
• 51:54
  Speaker 1: Click on the prank button. Ain't leave me all your information.
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: I call you, We talk you let me know who
• 52:00
  Speaker 1: were pranking. We work out our plan and that's how
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: we do it. Thomas Miles dot Com. I promise you
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: We're gonna prank some great ones. That's what I do.
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: That's crazy, man, that's whoa Tommy. All right, coming up next,
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: it is today's Strawberry Letter. Wait till you guys hear this.
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: When you thought yesterday's was crazy, well this one is
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: crazy too. The subject is he stole my heart and
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: a few other things. He stole my heart and a
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: few other things. We're gonna get into it, Steve, and
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: I you're gonna steal, though, Shirley. If you're gonna steal,
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: I mean still a lot. Don't you steal your heart?
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: I mean, if you're gonna fevery going in feveryck one
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: more time. He stole my heart and a few other things.
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: We'll get into the Strawberry Letter right after this. You're
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: listening to show. All right, guys, time now for today's
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter and listen. If you need advice on sex,
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: on dating, relationships, work, parenting, and more, please submit your
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter to Steve Harvey FM dot com and click
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: submit Strawberry Letter. We could well, I don't know, we
• 53:15
  Speaker 1: could reach your letter like we're gonna do that one
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: today could be puppy, buck up and hold on tight.
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: We got it for you. Here. It is the strawberry letter,
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: Thank you nephews, subject he stole my heart and a
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: few other things. Dear Stephen Shirley. A while back, I
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: met a man on a dating app and it was
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: supposed to be just a one night stand. He came
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: over and we had the most explosive sex. After that,
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: we talked all night. He lives out of town, and
• 53:46
  Speaker 1: when he got back home, we talked daily and spend
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: hours getting to know each other. He came back to
• 53:52
  Speaker 1: visit me because he was dying to have sex with me.
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: We admitted that we were catching feelings. After he left,
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: I noticed that he changed If I missed his call,
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: he called me back to back until I answered. It
• 54:07
  Speaker 1: was so sweet, but I kept reassuring him that I
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: wasn't cheating. He came to visit again, and this time
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: he brought some of his clothes and a few personal
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: things to leave at my house. This made me so
• 54:21
  Speaker 1: happy because it meant we were an official couple. Whenever
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: we got into arguments, he jokingly say, don't make me
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: pop up to see what you're doing. I never thought
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: he would do it, but he did. One Saturday, I
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: volunteered to feed the homeless, and I couldn't use my
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: phone while I was serving due to the COVID nineteen guidelines.
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: At the place, I went for four hours without answering
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: my man's calls and he lost it. When I got home,
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: he had kicked my door in and he left me
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: a note. I discovered that he took all of his clothes,
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: and he also took my four two inch TV, two lamps,
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: some of my shoes, some frozen steaks, and the microwave.
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: It was so random, since he has never bought me anything.
• 55:12
  Speaker 1: I called to beg him to come back, but he
• 55:15
  Speaker 1: said it's over and he never wants to see me again.
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: How can I get this man to see that I
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: would never cheat on him? How can I fix this? Okay,
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna read your words back to you and see
• 55:28
  Speaker 1: if this sparks anything in your brain. You say, when
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: I got home, he had kicked my door in. He'd
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: left me a note. I discovered he took all of
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: my clothes, and he also took my forty two inch
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: TV to lamp, some of my shoes, some frozen steaks,
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: and the microwave. Okay, does that sound crazy to you?
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: I mean, doesn't that sound a little crazy? It does
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: to me. I'm sure it does to Steve and to
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: everyone else listening. So why, why why would you want
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: this ignorant man back in your life? I honestly, it
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: sounds scary. I mean, who does this? He sounds like
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: some kind of psychopath to me, I just say, consider
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: yourself blessed that that's all. He took the TV in
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: the microwave and some shoes, and I really don't get
• 56:14
  Speaker 1: the stakes part anyway. He sounds violent, he sounds controlling,
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: he sounds possessive. To me, I'm so glad. I'm really
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: glad you weren't in the house because I think he
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: would have put his hands on you. I really do.
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: And it's really a shame I think that I have
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: to tell you this. It really pains me, honestly, because
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: you gotta know, you need to know this, that you
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: shouldn't be so desperate that you would think that you
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: would have to beg this man to come back to
• 56:41
  Speaker 1: you to do what I mean, let him go, please, girl,
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: you gotta let him go, and don't ever invite him
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: back to your house. I mean, he tried to destroy
• 56:52
  Speaker 1: your house. He kicked the door in. Come on, he's
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: a thief. Remember that, Please don't forget that. Let's be clear.
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: This man sounds very stable. I think you need to
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: run and run quickly and get away from him. Steve
• 57:05
  Speaker 1: Well good letters, Shirley. I see a little something else
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: in here that I probably need to go over and cover. Yes,
• 57:19
  Speaker 1: met this man on this day. Now, this way, this
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: went wrong. It was supposed to be a one night stand.
• 57:27
  Speaker 1: This a hit it, quitt it, sock it, knock it,
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: throw it, catch it. He came over and we had,
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: in your words, the most explosive sex. Now, let me
• 57:48
  Speaker 1: show you what happens after you have explosive sex. Y'all
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: talk daily spend. I was getting to know each other.
• 58:02
  Speaker 1: Came back to visit because he was dying to have
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: sex with me again. You know why, because it was explosive.
• 58:10
  Speaker 1: We admitted we was catching feelings. He left and I
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: noticed he changed. If I missed his calls, he would
• 58:19
  Speaker 1: call me back to back to back. You know why,
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: because y'all had explosive sex. Explosive sex will make you
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: call back to back to back to back. Damn it.
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: Answer me. If you'd just had regular sex, none of
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: this would be happening to you. Yeah, you thought it
• 58:46
  Speaker 1: was so sweet, didn't you. I kept with shooting him.
• 58:50
  Speaker 1: I wasn't cheating. He came to visit again, and this
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: time he bought some clothes with him and a few
• 58:55
  Speaker 1: personal things and leaving my house. You know why, because
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: y'all was down there. Haven't exploding six, just blowing a scoon,
• 59:05
  Speaker 1: just blowing up stove, snatching piers out of gnas, dropping
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: it on the side of the bed. This made me happy.
• 59:12
  Speaker 1: It made you think you was an official couple. Whenever
• 59:15
  Speaker 1: we got into arguments, he jokingly, safe, don't make me
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: pop up. See what you're doing. You know why, man,
• 59:22
  Speaker 1: just pop up, because y'all had explosive six. Explosive This
• 59:31
  Speaker 1: your whole damn problem. That all right? Hold on explosive six.
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: Hold on, Steve, we'll have part two of your response
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: showing up at twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: subject he Stole my Heart and a few other things.
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening
• 59:49
  Speaker 1: to Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, Come on, Steve,
• 59:53
  Speaker 1: let's recap today's Strawberry Letters. Subject he Stole my Heart
• 59:57
  Speaker 1: and a few other things. Met a man on the
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: day nap hooked up with him. Supposed to be a
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: one night stand, end up having the most explosive sex ever.
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 1: He called every day because you was having explosive sex.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: He came back because he missed you so much. Because
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: y'all was having explosive sex. He admitted that he wanted you.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: Y'all had sex. I missed his call. He called back
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 1: to back to back because y'all was having explosive sex.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 1: You thought it was sweet. And then he came to visit.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 1: He bought some clothes and left some personal things at
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: the house. That's so he can just have a shirt
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: over there, because you don't. After you have explosive sex,
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: you need to have a change of clothes explosive sex
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: and put them same draws on you. Explosive sex, you
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 1: gotta change your side. See explosive sex is different. Your
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 1: belt probably don't fasten no more. You need a set
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 1: of clothes, shoe strings and came all out your shoes
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: because y'all have an explosive second you open the doors,
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 1: he diving across the porch. Then when y'all have an arguments,
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 1: he say, don't make me pop up and see what
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 1: you're doing. I never thought he'd do it, but he did.
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: You down there trying to feed the homeless. You volunteer
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 1: to feed him, and you can't use your phone while
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: you're serving because you're dipping food due to the COVID guidelines.
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 1: You went four hours without answering your man's car and
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: dog gonn it. He lost it. You know why he
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 1: lost it because he was looking. But that explosive sex,
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: and it was not on the phone every time. When
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: I got home, he didn't kick your dough in and
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: left you a note. But you discovered he took all
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: his clothes, took you for the two inch TV, two lamps,
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 1: some of your shoes, some frozen steaks, and the microwave. Now,
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 1: after he did all that, this is what you said.
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 1: It was so random since he never bought me anything.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: He didn't buy me no shoes or no microwave, and
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 1: just taking TVs down off the wall. I don't understand
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: he didn't buy none of that stuff. That was your
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: statement after that. Then right after that, you said I
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 1: called to beg him back. Let's park this letter for
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 1: a minute. What is wrong with you? See, maybe this
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: explosive sex wasn't just having him do ignorant mess. It's
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: got you doing ignorant mess too. So a man kick
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 1: your dough in, leave you a note, took his clothes,
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 1: your forty two, his TV, two lamps, some of your shoes,
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 1: some frozen steaks in the microwave, and you begged him
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 1: to come back. What did he miss something? Baby? You
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: got to come back. I can't believe you left all
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 1: this chicken in this freezer. How can I get this
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 1: man to see that I would never cheat on him?
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: Wait a minute, sure he had this right? What are
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 1: you talking about? Why are you concerned with getting him
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 1: back and trying to prove to this man that you
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 1: didn't cheat? He kicked your doing Yes, come on, he
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 1: took a flash grew You're not how hard he had,
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 1: take a far to two inch TV off al wall,
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 1: put it in your car with your shoes. Oh damn microwave?
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: How did he get that microwave? About that wall? Can
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 1: I ask you something? Huh? Why did he take frozen steaks?
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: So because he had to drive home? They keep better?
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: Oh so you know, taking that out thefrigerator because he'd
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 1: be small, it's hot. He put him in a trunk
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: back that that engine, that engine kicking off heat off
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 1: that muffler, okay, and it'd be small by the time
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 1: he get home. Okay, okay. And then you know he
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 1: probably stay out of time down because they met on
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 1: the app. Yeah, he does. He spent and they talked daily,
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 1: and he came back to visits. He came back to
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 1: visit me from out of town. He didn't come over,
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 1: he came back to visit. He stay out of town.
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 1: So you still frozen states because they keep on the
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 1: highway back. You know what, I'm not thank you for
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 1: bringing it. Yeah, I appreciate it. You got to thank
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 1: this thing out. You don't when you fit to go
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 1: back home. You gotta drive awhile. You don't take an
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 1: out refrigerator that's pass. You get it frozen so it
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: can last. I don't know why I would not want
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 1: to see him again, all having all this exploding sex
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 1: and he's still in stuff and he didn't explode it
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 1: so good. I don't even know he's still in stuff
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: to kick the whole damn though. And you ain't got
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 1: a lock no more. You ain't there trying to go
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 1: to bed to night. You don't leave some cardboard up
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: get show though, that's crazy. She wants to how can
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 1: I fix this? What did you do wrong? Because I'm
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: looking in the letter. I'm trying to figure out what
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 1: you did wrong? Lady? What's wrong with you? Don't you?
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 1: You are what's called broun. Don't get on this explosive
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 1: set and get yourself hurt. Something wrong with him? Bron,
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: you don't answer the phone. He kicked a doe in
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 1: the star stilling and she's just madam. But the whole
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 1: damn dough When you kick the doe in dog, you
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: know how hard he is kick a doe in man.
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: Everybody can't do it any all right, Thank you, Steve.
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 1: FM on Instagram and Facebook, and please don't forget to
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 1: check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand coming out.
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: More of the Steve Harvey Morning Show right after this.
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 1: You're listening Steven Show. All right, guys, it is time
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: Steve for comedy roulette. You're ready. Jay explained it again.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 1: Let me break this down very simple. Give us five subjects.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: Put them on a wheel. Yeah, spun the wheel stop. Yes,
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 1: spun as a spin. That's totally different. Red, spun it
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 1: around stop. We'll do the damn thing all right. Number one.
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: Things you say to yourself when you're mad at someone.
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 1: Number two, you know it's time to go to the
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 1: store when dot dot dad. Number three stuff you don't
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 1: like to watch, but you watch it anyway to keep
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 1: them happy. You know we all know about that or him? Whatever.
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 1: Come home, let's go cat. Let's whoa it came on.
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 1: Number one. Things you say to yourself when you're mad
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 1: at someone. Say to you yourself when you're mad at someone,
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 1: I canna. Here's some things you say to yourself when
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 1: you're mad at somebody. I'm gonna let it go this time,
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: but the next damn time. Oh, it's gonna be hell,
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 1: gonna be hell. It's gonna be hell. Just when I
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 1: always say to myself when i'm mad at other people,
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 1: I'm trying not to go jail. I'm doing my best.
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: You say I'm doing my best right now. I'm trying
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 1: not to go to jail. You're really mad, No, now
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 1: you're mad, court dates everything trying, nephew, you know what.
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 1: That's all right? Drink that water that I put up
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 1: in that all right. Things you say to yourself when
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 1: you're mad at someone Steve better go ahead, only you
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 1: better go head on. Now this is black, that's all
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 1: it is. God. Then you say to yourself when you're
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 1: mad and somebody, Lord, please work with me, Jesus, please please, Father, Father,
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 1: take me down so I don't kill us. That's what
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 1: I always say that I'm always man somebody. It's just
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 1: something you said before. Do somebody, that's why your ass broke.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 1: Now that hurt. That hurts, but you say it to yourself. Yeah,
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 1: show glad that ain't my big coming up More of
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 1: the Steve Harvey Morning Show right after this. You're listening,
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 1: the guys are here, they're gonna break down. You know
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 1: you've had good sex when dot dot dot I'm gonna
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 1: do a couple and then I know the guy's gonna
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 1: jump in. I know the a lot of people have
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 1: been getting used to one another and they've rested damn,
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 1: so that they've been thrown down some good loving. You
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 1: know you have had some good sex. When you wake
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 1: up with one sock on you like, damn, what the
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 1: hell happened? Where's my sock? There's another one? You know
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 1: you've had some good ass loving when both of y'all
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 1: wake up between the two mattresses, like, yeah, the mattress
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 1: is on top that good. Two more, I got two
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 1: more got you know, just for the men, Just for
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 1: the men. You have had some good a loving when
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 1: you wake up you look in the mirror and you
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 1: got on her eyelash like damn, this was good boy,
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 1: good Yeah, I got woman. I got woman right. You
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: know you have had some good loving, good ass love
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 1: it when you wake up and both of y'all is
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 1: at the bottom of the bed like how to help?
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 1: What is it? I know you got one? Anybody got
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 1: one German and bring it, bring it, bring it you.
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 1: When you know you had some good loving, when you're
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 1: not all her medicals, medications off the night stands, all
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 1: the bills is everywhere. We don't know which one to take.
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 1: I love it. I love it, Tim, But you got
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: you know, you know when you have some good loving
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 1: and you just look at her and say, what your mama? What? What? Generation?
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 1: I love it? You know you know you didn't have
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 1: some good loving when you wake up the next morning
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 1: and call into work and you your job ain't been
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 1: open Sinster thirteen, I ain't gonna make it today. I
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 1: love it. You know, you know you have had some
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 1: good loving when you wake up and there's a hot
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: blue gun in your hand and it's still on, like
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 1: what day? Hell? Why blewing? You know you had some
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 1: good sex when you kick over a candle in the
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 1: middle of sex and y'all turn into firefighter. Alright, alright, alright.
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 1: You know you had some good loving when you in
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 1: the middle of it and look hooey in her eyes
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 1: and said, you know what, I'm gonna buy you some money.
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 1: I's got a god, I'm an buy you some money,
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 1: ain't me. You know you didn't have some good loving
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 1: when both of y'all jump up and start washing your
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 1: hands and it ain't got nothing to do with corona.
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 1: I got one more. I got one more, and then
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 1: you close that one more. You know you have had
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 1: some good loving when you wake up and there's a
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 1: happy face on your ass. You cannot loads it up,
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 1: Steve loads it out, man. We know you didn't have
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 1: some good loving when the family is down there having
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 1: breakfast doing quarantine and you and your wife looking at
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 1: the kids and go, what y'all looking at us for?
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 1: We're hooking that off? Grown folks? All right, coming up back,
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 1: David over here, close the dope right after this, you're listening.
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 1: How many friends do you guys have? I'm not talking
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 1: about social media friends. I'm talking about real friends. Now.
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 1: According to a new survey, the average American has about
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: sixteen friends. Of these sixteen friends, what yeah, yeah, they
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 1: didn't got no damn sixteen Steve, this is, according to
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 1: a new survey, sixteen yeah, yeah, and they say of
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 1: these they say, Of these sixteen friends, three were described
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 1: as friends for life, five were people they really liked
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 1: and would hang out with one on one, and the
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 1: other eight were people the respondent said they liked but
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 1: would not spend time with them one on one. The
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 1: survey also found that the average American adult has made
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 1: a new friend hasn't made a new friend in five years. Because, Steve,
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 1: I gotta ask you. It begs the question, how many
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 1: friends real friends do you have? Sixteen or less? Probably
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 1: got five? Five? You can con them on one hand?
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 1: True friends. Yeah, I'm talking about ride or dad, don't
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 1: give a damn less go top five Yeah, I'm talking
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 1: about well with it five maybe or to make new
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 1: friends at this and I ain't made a friend in
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 1: five years? How well at work? At work? Steve, that's
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 1: where you are all the time. Friends you got Tommy,
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 1: I always say three. All right, we'll be back. We'll
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 1: pick this conversation up when when we come back at
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 1: thirty three after the hour you're listening to show. All right, Steve,
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 1: we were talking about how many friends do we have.
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 1: There's a new survey and it says that the average
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 1: American has about sixteen friends. Of those sixteen, it's impossible. Well, well,
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 1: this is how they break it down. Three were described
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 1: as friends for life, three you have for life. Five
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 1: were people you really liked and you would hang out
• 1:15:56
  Speaker 1: with one on one, and then the other eight were
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 1: people the respondent said they liked, but they wouldn't spend
• 1:16:01
  Speaker 1: time with them one on one. And then that's not
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 1: your friend. Yeah, that's you wouldn't consider that. People you
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 1: really like don't necessarily mean that your friends. Yeah, that's
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: true as well. Yeah, and then they say the average
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 1: American adult hasn't made a new friend in five years.
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 1: I know that, And you know why you don't have
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 1: time to learn nobody else then learn you. Yeah. Yeah,
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 1: there's a trust factor. Yeah, when you say something that's right,
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 1: I can't believe a little bit yeah, you get quiet.
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 1: I noticed you get quiet. But it was right, he
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 1: was he was some point, Yeah, it was. You ain't
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 1: got to have to learn nobody. But it sounds like
• 1:16:43
  Speaker 1: with us, this group right here, we don't use that
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 1: term loosely when I call you a friend. Yeah, come on, yeah, yeah,
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 1: I can count on you no matter what. Yeah. That's
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 1: the five of them dudes in my world. I'm sixty
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 1: two years old. And it's about loyalty too. It's about
• 1:17:02
  Speaker 1: and and and my good ones didn't die. Yeah that's
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 1: what's cold. But you know, look, I know, like my
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 1: friends for life, Butcher Ricardo, So you know, you look
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 1: at Butcher Ricardo. I've been friends with Manny since I
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 1: was four. My best friend from from college is marvel
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 1: Is Marvin Horton. We steal boys, do ride or die.
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 1: I'm talking about Biggie Wig and Blue. I'm talking about
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 1: man dudes that walk off the edge for you. Yeah yeah,
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 1: Biggie Wig and Blue Prue. Yeah they walk off the
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 1: edge for you. Man. Yeah, that ain't no lie. Ricky
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 1: Lewis could ask brother to man. But I got dude
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 1: friend that I called like like Steve Perry, Doctor Perry.
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 1: Oh this is my dude. Man, he could he climb
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 1: down in the hold with Yeah, what do you call it? Group?
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 1: That's after friends? But they still cool with you, you
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. But you're not in that top,
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 1: you're not in that five. Well maybe it's levels of friends. Yeah, yeah,
• 1:18:15
  Speaker 1: I think I still be friends, right, I think that.
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 1: I think that, And that's what they were saying. Uh,
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 1: some people are with you ride or die, and then
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 1: others are I know, spend time with them one on one.
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 1: You know, Yeah, I think they're different levels of friendship
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 1: because I mean, you know, I call them like New
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 1: York like short for New York a n y K.
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 1: That's what I call. Just put them in the n
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 1: y K group like New York. I know what he's saying,
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 1: n y K York. Um. All right, Well we'll be
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 1: back with more of the Harvey Morning Show, I know,
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 1: coming up at forty nine after some closing remarks coming
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 1: up as well right after this you're listening show, all right, Steve,
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 1: last break of the day, Please leave us with some
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 1: closing remarks like only you can. This is to help
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 1: you make ready for your blessings. Now, what I'm gonna
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 1: give you is gonna be hard for most people to do.
• 1:19:17
  Speaker 1: I already know that it was difficult for me to do.
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 1: But a very very wealthy person taught this to me.
• 1:19:25
  Speaker 1: I didn't think much of it until I did it,
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 1: and boil, boil, boy, did it help make room for
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 1: what God had for me? Not only that, it freed
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 1: me up. And I'll tell you what this very very
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 1: successful people person told me. If I told you his name,
• 1:19:47
  Speaker 1: you probably wouldn't know him. He's not famous. He's just
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 1: extremely wealthy. And when I tell you extremely wealthy, I
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 1: mean it. But if I said his name, you wouldn't
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 1: even notice. Guy. If I showed you a picture of him,
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 1: that person wouldn't even know who he was. But he
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 1: taught this to me. He said, in your journey, if
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 1: you want to really clear the slate, get a fresh start,
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 1: and prepare yourself to receive what all God has for you,
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 1: you have to take inventory of the people in your life.
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 1: And when you take this inventory, you are going to
• 1:20:23
  Speaker 1: have to act as though you are a gardener. You
• 1:20:26
  Speaker 1: are a gardener with a grove, and your grove is
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 1: your life. The things you want to bear fruit from God,
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 1: your trees. You want apples, this season. You want lemons,
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 1: you want grapefruits, you want peaches, you want pass plums.
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 1: You've got to take care of your orchard in order
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 1: to take care of your archard. I notice you've all
• 1:20:48
  Speaker 1: noticed that from time to time you see the gardeners
• 1:20:51
  Speaker 1: outside pruning trees. They cutting them back, They're clipping dead
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 1: ends off. You know why because that maximizes the growth
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 1: of the good and the tree. If you take the dead,
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 1: unnecessary branches off, the withering ends, it allows for the
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 1: tree to bad more fruit. So, Steve, how do you
• 1:21:12
  Speaker 1: take inventory of people? This is what he taught me.
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 1: He said, you have three kinds of people in your life.
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 1: He said, you have people who approach you with nothing
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 1: but bad news. All of us know them. Everybody has
• 1:21:29
  Speaker 1: somebody that walks up to them and every time they
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 1: start talking something wrong, or every time they give you
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 1: a phone call, they bring you bad news. And the
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 1: bad news don't just be about them. They bring you
• 1:21:43
  Speaker 1: bad news about you. Did you hear that though they
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 1: were saying about you down here and you just go mad.
• 1:21:50
  Speaker 1: Have you ever had a person that every time they
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 1: came up to you, you just felt dark because they
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 1: just bought bad news. Those people that you have in
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 1: your life if you don't need them. I want you
• 1:22:02
  Speaker 1: to put go through your phone contacts and everybody that
• 1:22:08
  Speaker 1: is no good, that never moves your life forward, doesn't
• 1:22:12
  Speaker 1: give you any helpful advice, doesn't help you aid you
• 1:22:15
  Speaker 1: in any way, has nothing but bad news and want
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 1: something for you. One side of friendships. I want you
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 1: to put a dot next to that contact name, a
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 1: black dot. The next person you have in your life
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 1: are called sometimy people. They the fifty fifties in your life.
• 1:22:32
  Speaker 1: They cool over here as long as you're doing this,
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 1: but they're not cool over here. You can take them here,
• 1:22:38
  Speaker 1: but you can't take them there. You can discuss this,
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 1: but you can't bring up that. You can lead them
• 1:22:46
  Speaker 1: that way, but you can't show them the other way.
• 1:22:50
  Speaker 1: Sometimes they cool with you about stuff, sometimes they ain't.
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 1: Those are called sometimy people or what we're gonna call
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 1: fifty fifty people. Everybody got them in their life. When
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 1: you have a fifty fifty person, what I want you
• 1:23:05
  Speaker 1: to do is put an asterid by their name that contact.
• 1:23:09
  Speaker 1: Put an asterid. Remember all the bad news people that's
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 1: always bringing you bad news in darkness A black dot
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 1: next to their name. The next person is the fifty
• 1:23:19
  Speaker 1: fifty person. They sometime they're cool, here they ain't cool
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 1: that put an asterid by their name. The last person
• 1:23:25
  Speaker 1: that you know are people who are very supportive of you,
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 1: people who are willing to pray for you. People who
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 1: always try to be uplifting, people who when they got
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 1: news for you, they try to make it of the
• 1:23:41
  Speaker 1: positive nature. A person who comes to your aid and
• 1:23:44
  Speaker 1: your rescue. A person that picks up the phone just
• 1:23:47
  Speaker 1: to see how you're doing, and you bet not mention
• 1:23:50
  Speaker 1: that something's wrong, because here they come. It's people in
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 1: your life, man, that you don't even have to talk
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 1: when you're around them. You could just sit and be stealing, y'all,
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 1: just cool like that. Everybody got that ride or die that.
• 1:24:06
  Speaker 1: I don't care what you tell them. They don't pass judgment.
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 1: They just your friends. Well, when you have that person,
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 1: and I'm gonna be real honest with you, it ain't
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 1: a whole lot of them. I want you to put
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 1: a check by their name. So you got a black
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 1: dot next to the dark. People who bring you none
• 1:24:25
  Speaker 1: but bad news, negativity, something wrong. Every time you got
• 1:24:29
  Speaker 1: an asterick by the name of the people who are fifty, fifty,
• 1:24:33
  Speaker 1: sometimey people and you got a check by the people
• 1:24:36
  Speaker 1: that's always supportive prayer for bringing you good news. Now
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 1: here's what you do. I want you to take everybody
• 1:24:41
  Speaker 1: with a black dot next to their name, and everybody
• 1:24:44
  Speaker 1: with an asterisk next to their name, and I want
• 1:24:47
  Speaker 1: you to block them as your contact, block them out
• 1:24:51
  Speaker 1: your phone, and block them from your email. If they family,
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 1: block them from your phone and block them from email.
• 1:25:01
  Speaker 1: All I want you to have is people who have
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 1: your phone number that have a check by your name.
• 1:25:06
  Speaker 1: You're gonna lose a lot of people, but guess what,
• 1:25:08
  Speaker 1: you're gonna gain a lot of ground. You don't have
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 1: no idea how much time you waste with people in
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 1: your life who are fifty to fifty and always got
• 1:25:17
  Speaker 1: bad news. If you eliminate them, you've cleaned house, your
• 1:25:21
  Speaker 1: inventories cleaned. You now have cleared room to receive the
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 1: blessings God have for you in this year. I dare
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 1: you to try it. It works, it sounds cool, it
• 1:25:30
  Speaker 1: sounds like it's hurtful, but man, if you want to win,
• 1:25:33
  Speaker 1: you gotta do it. Those are my closing email. Drop
• 1:25:35
  Speaker 1: it back old unless otherwise stated. For complete contest rules,
• 1:25:41
  Speaker 1: visit Steve Harvey FM dot com. You're listening to s