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Tommy's Tips, Steve's Roach Story, MTH, How Many Alarms and more. · The Steve Harvey Morning Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Today's show is pre recorded. Y'all know what time. Y'all
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: don't know. Y'all have a suit giving them like the
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: million bucks things in it to be good to mother. Please,
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: I don't join jo. Do you turn you go? You
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: gotta turn to turn out. You haven't got to turn
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: them out to turn the water the water go. Come
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: come on your baby, huh, I sure will. A good
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: morning everybody. You're listening to the voice, Come on dig
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: me now, one and only Steve Harvey got a radio
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: show man. God is in a blessing business. I'm in
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: the receiving line, man. That's a good feeling. I thank
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: God for waking me up in the mornings, I really
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: really do. I thank God for the spirit that he
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: wakes me up with because I finally, but I finally
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: figured it out. Such a blessing that shouldn't be taken
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: for granted. The fact that you are up today, the
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: fact that you just got off working, you driving home,
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: the fact that you got a job to come home from,
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: the fact that you got a job to wake up too.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: Whatever it is, the fact that you can see, think, here, smell, walk, talk, rhyme, reason,
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: whatever it is, it's a blessing Man. I was talking
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: to a partner of mine last night and an analogy
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: came to me last night of what my life has
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: been like. Just going over my story with a friend
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: of matter, all some of the things I had gone through,
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: and he never knew it because he said, man, you
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: never told me that we were just talking. One of
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  Speaker 1: the things I remember, and it's kind of equated to
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: my life, was when I was a little boy and
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: she'd go to the store with my mom and she
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: would let me buy a jigsaw puzzle. Now, for those
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: of you, a jigsaw puzzle comes in a box that
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: are no instructions. It just comes in a box and
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  Speaker 1: it's simple. You're gonna dump the pieces out in a
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  Speaker 1: pile and you're gonna try to put the pieces together
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  Speaker 1: until it looks like the picture that's on the cover
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  Speaker 1: of the box. That's as simple as it is. Here
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  Speaker 1: is the deal. I would select a jigsaw puzzle based
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  Speaker 1: on the picture that I liked and if I thought
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  Speaker 1: I could do it. Now, if the picture looked too crazy,
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  Speaker 1: if it looked too intricate, I didn't want that puzzle,
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  Speaker 1: you know. And the thing was, back in the day,
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: you got a jigsaw puzzle. You had a hundred piece puzzles.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: Four hundred piece puzzles, man, then they say a thousand
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: piece puzzle. You go, oh. So those were a little
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: difficult for me when I was a little boy, so
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: I didn't want that. As I got a little bit older,
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  Speaker 1: I had more challenging puzzles, you know, four fifty five
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: hundred piece puzzles. But I always picked a picture of
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  Speaker 1: something I liked. So it's very simple. You get the
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: jigsaw puzzle, you get it home, you open it up,
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  Speaker 1: you dump it out on the table. You flipped all
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: the pieces over so you can see them, and then
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: I would try to saw them based on the colors
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  Speaker 1: on the box. If it was like a black section,
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  Speaker 1: I'd take all the black pieces and slide them over there.
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  Speaker 1: If it was some flowers, I'd try to find all
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  Speaker 1: the pictures with little jig saw pieces with the little
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  Speaker 1: floor and I separate them. And then I started putting
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  Speaker 1: it together. And the way I started was I try
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: to build the border first, because I knew all the
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: straight edges had to be side by side at one point.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: And it was funny, man, because it's related to my life.
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  Speaker 1: I would start putting the pieces together of the picture
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  Speaker 1: I saw that I liked, and that would be my picture.
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  Speaker 1: A lot of people didn't like Jig saw puzzles. As
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: a matter of fact, none of the boys on the
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: street like Jig saw puzzles but me, because they just
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: didn't want to go through the intricate details of figuring
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: that out. Really go outside and run or something like that.
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  Speaker 1: And so what happened was, as I got older, I
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  Speaker 1: wanted more difficult than challenging puzzles, but I wouldn't go
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  Speaker 1: too far. I wanted some nice stuff to happen. I
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  Speaker 1: had a picture of what I wanted for my life,
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  Speaker 1: but I didn't want to go too far because it
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  Speaker 1: was so challenging and difficult. I couldn't see myself at
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  Speaker 1: all of that, and I didn't have the time, the knowledge,
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  Speaker 1: the expertise to figuring all the intricate details. And I
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  Speaker 1: discovered something when I was talking last night. That's what
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  Speaker 1: happens in life to a lot of people. You get
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: bogged down with the details of coming up and trying
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  Speaker 1: to create the picture that you want for yourself. You
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: put it to the side. You said, ah, that puzzles
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  Speaker 1: are crazy. Next thing, you know, you crumbled it up
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: and put it back in the box. So you go
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: halfway and you get stuck, and you get to the
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  Speaker 1: part where it ain't a lot of different colors. It's
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  Speaker 1: all the same, and that's a little bit more challenging.
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  Speaker 1: So that may stop you. But it's somewhere in the
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  Speaker 1: jigsaw puzzle that it gets very difficult and challenging. The
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  Speaker 1: bigger the picture you want, but then what a happened
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  Speaker 1: in your life, it's just like what a happened in
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  Speaker 1: the jigsaw. Once you get comfortable and you don't mind
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  Speaker 1: the challenge, you could get a bigger picture. But here's
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  Speaker 1: the key to it, though, if you put God in
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  Speaker 1: your mix. See, the picture that I saw for myself
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  Speaker 1: as a boy is not the picture that has happened
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  Speaker 1: to me as a man, because along the way from
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: boyhood to manhood, from the time I was ten, you
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  Speaker 1: understand what happened along the riding now was I started
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: putting God in the mix. And so now the picture
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  Speaker 1: that I have now is not the picture I saw.
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  Speaker 1: It's the picture that God saw. So what I'm saying
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  Speaker 1: this analogy is the picture you have may be difficult
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  Speaker 1: to complete, but if you were to include God in
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  Speaker 1: your life. Put God in your jigsaw puzzle. God will
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  Speaker 1: not only help you complete the puzzle, and he gonna
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  Speaker 1: add some pieces, he gonna do some favors, he gonna
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  Speaker 1: show some mercy, and you're gonna look up and the
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  Speaker 1: picture that you're able to end up with or be
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  Speaker 1: totally different and much more complete, much more beautiful or
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  Speaker 1: bigger picture than the one you had. Because there's no
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  Speaker 1: way that I could have saw the life that I
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  Speaker 1: have today back when I was a boy. And it
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: amazes me when I hear people say I always saw
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: this for myself. I didn't do that. I didn't quite
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  Speaker 1: see this for myself. I don't know how you can
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  Speaker 1: have the ability to see what God really has for you.
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  Speaker 1: But man, he's a masterful jigsaw man. He's an incredible
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  Speaker 1: puzzle complet So if you got a puzzle that's challenging
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  Speaker 1: to you, maybe you need to see what's the picture
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: that God has for your life. If God were in
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: your life, if you completed the puzzle, what would it
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: look like. It'll be a far more extensive puzzle and
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: it would be a far more beautiful piece of scenery
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  Speaker 1: than you could have ever imagined. Tears come in my
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: eyes because I can't believe God bought me this far.
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: I can't believe that when I opened up and accepted
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: him and started talking to him, that he would add
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: all these pieceles to my jigsaw puzzle, and my jigsaw
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  Speaker 1: puzzle would look like this. And I can tell you
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: I ain't got a whole lot to do with what
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: I had and turned into. It's mostly favored and blessings
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: and grace and mercy of God. And I looked up
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  Speaker 1: and I just got a much bigger jigsaw puzzle completed.
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  Speaker 1: And guess what, He ain't through with me yet. That's
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: what's amazing and exciting about a relationship with God. God
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  Speaker 1: could take your jigsaw puzzle and fix it. Show ladies
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: and gentlemen, Welcome to the Steve Harvey Morning Show. I've
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: got sunshine on a cloudy day when it's cold outside.
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: I got the month of me. Well, I guess you say,
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: I guess you say? What can make me feel this way?
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: There you go? Come, I'm talking about my girl. I'm
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: talking about my girl Hill, my girl. I've got so
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: much honey. What that touched me? Did that hurt? No? No,
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: that touch me Okay, touching and hurting me is different.
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  Speaker 1: That had on the way the rest of my day?
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: Is it gonna go? I've got so much boy, I
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: just touched myself again. I got doing this for you.
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: I'm doing this to get my day started. And if
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: you ain't feeling me, that's okay. We'll have another show tomorrow.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: My motto is, if you don't like the show today,
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: praise God if he gives us tomorrow. Nas a gentleman,
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: Charley Strawberry, callin for real, Mississippi Monica, Junior kill Spades,
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: Nephew Tommy, and yours truly, Junior, Come on, I gotta
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: understand it. I don't know how does how does heart
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: singing do that for you? Well? You know, it's the
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: emotion of it. It ain't the notes, it ain't connect tivity.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: It's the feeling. Okay, it's a feeling, Junior. Yeah, you know,
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna play something for you a little bit later
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: on and then you tell me, okay, you know, okay,
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: how you feel about it, something that you could relate to,
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: and then and then we'll see. But it's always the
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: emotion of it, you know. And you've got to you
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: got to you know, I think, Julie, you got to
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: lend yourself to that a little bit more often, because
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: I'm not sure if you do that. I just saw
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: it to look on your face and everything. It was
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: all on your counsel you. You was gone. I have
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: to I leave here. When I do that, I enter
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: the realm of oh my lord. Yeah, I'm trying to
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: find something. M what you can relate to? Okay, looking
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: for something? Oh yeah, here, probably that junior, you could
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: relate to this? Right here? Here we gone. Let me
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: play it a little bit louder, wait for me professional single.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: They didn't give a damn about the note either. All right, listen,
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: coming up at thirty two minutes after the hour, we're
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: gonna start the show off with nephew Tommy's run that
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: prank back right after this. You're listening to Steve Harvey
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: Morning Show. Here's the nephew with today's prank. Phone call
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: what you got for us? And have come on? Well, Schuley,
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: you know you gotta give up something for lent. I
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: think I'm gonna give up this man's wife. I'm gonna
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna give it up for lent. Yeah what what? What?
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: What I'm gonna give up the man's wife for let's
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: go care though. Hello, Hey, I'm trying to reach Dorsey. Yeah,
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: this is it this cliff Man. I work at the
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: post office with your wife. Yea, how you're doing, bro,
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: I'm doing all right? Everything cool? Yeah, everything good man,
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: everything good. Um. Like I say, my name is cliff Man.
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: I wanted to reach out and holt you about a
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: couple of things. If you if you got a minute,
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: you got a minute? Yeah, everything all right with my wife.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: There's something wrong or something no, no, no no, no, no
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: no no, your wife good man, your wife good. I
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: wanted to hit you up. Man. We've been working in
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: the post office quite a while. We've probably been in
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: the same room a few times. Man. I don't know
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: if you you remember meeting me or not, but uh, okay, okay.
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: But what I wanted to say, man, is trying to
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: do better with my life dog and you know, just
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: just trying to do better, you know what I'm saying.
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: So you know, for live man, I gave up a
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: few things, you know what I'm saying. I just thought
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: that would be a good thing, man, to try to
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: do the things that matter the most that you addicted to,
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: you know, you want to get rid of you know.
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: What I'm saying, at least for Lent is what I'm
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: trying to do. You feel me, Oh hey, I'm kind
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: of confused. But what they got to do with me? Basically, Man,
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: I'm giving up for Lent. You know. I decided to
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: give up messing around with your wife, you know, because
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: because who who WHOA hold on? Man? Hold on, Man,
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: I'm at work. I don't know what you come back,
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: but back up and rephrase everything you just said. Well,
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: like I say, Man, for Lent, I'm trying to I'm
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: trying to give up stuff that I'm that I'm addicted to,
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: you know. And I just what they got to do
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: with me and my wife though, and you That's what
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to tell you. Man, I'm trying to give
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: up messing around with your wife for Lynn. That's what
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: I help giving up. I'm giving up messing around with
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: your wife for Lynn. Man talking about man messing around
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: with my wife? Man, got no time for no games
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: right now? Who this man? Like? What's your name again?
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: This is Cliff Man. I actually worked with her for
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: the last ten twelve years. But what I wanted to
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: really let you know it was. You know, her schedule
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: probably gonna change because what we used to be doing
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: we ain't doing. So she's probably gonna be coming home
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: a little bit earlier, a thing like that. But I
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: don't I don't want you getting addicted to it, because
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: after Lena's over, then you know, whip be back what
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: we used to do. Man, what is you talking about? Man?
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: Hold on, it's my wife's going to be home in
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: a minute. We're gonna talk about all the yep with me. Man,
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: I'm about to hold on? What what are you? Are
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: you in the city right now? Can I can I
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: meet with you right now? Cliff? Right? Okay? But what
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to say, well, like I'm saying, I'm trying
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: to do better, you know, I gave up trying to
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: do better. That sound like a bunch of to me.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: I got something for you and my wife? True? Okay, Okay, okay, man,
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: I mean, ain't you feeling me? Don't trying to do better? Though?
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: I ain't feeling the thing you calling me telling me
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: my wife? Fact, we need to meet up and talk
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: about this face to face, Cliff or what you think
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: I mean? We talked right now? If you want to
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: have a conversation. No, no, no, you just tell me
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: your address and me and my wife's gond to just
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: come on over there. How about that we all sit
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: down and have a little power. I don't know who
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: thank you is, man, but me and my wife been
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: together over fifteen years and we ain't never had no
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: problems with no like this, like the you're telling me
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: on this phone. It sounds like a bunch of crazy
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: to me. But somebody knick gonna today if the true.
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: So what you need to do? You need to tell
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: me your name, your number, and I don't know why
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: you came from this block phone number. You hear me, man,
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: I'm hearing you. Man. What I'm saying, the reason for
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: the call was to let you know, don't get used
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: to her schedule because after Lint, it's gonna be back
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: to the way it used to beat. That's all the phone, man,
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: what's the he's you talking about? What's your last name? Cliff?
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna come find you. I'm gonna come see you,
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: not Jack. My name is Cliff. Like I say, I
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: work at the Cliff and I work at the post.
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: Off was with so okay, well, how come you call
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: from a block number, Cliff, what's your phone number? Many? Hey, man, listen,
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: I'm not trying to have no confrontation with you. Man,
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: it's already a confrontation. You can call my phone from
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: a block number. I don't know you, you don't know me,
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: and you're telling me you be my wife? Are you serious?
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: Did you know she was married? I mean what you mean?
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: Did you know he was married? Yes? Or no? I
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: mean yeah, I know? I mean yeah, I knew she
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: was married. Okay, what that is? You knew that from
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: the jump, So that means you've been disrespecting me from
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: the jump. So now I got to getting your na
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: You just and told off on yourself. So here regardless,
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: I'm coming to see you today, Jack Hey, and my
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: name ain't Jack Man. My name Clip, but you're not.
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna look here. I don't know. I'm not
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: trying to have no confrontation. I just wanted you to
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: be aware of the schedule. Yeah, okay, I'm definitely aware
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: of not Clip. Who the hen is you? Man? Another thing? Man,
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: I want to see this like I know, I know
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: your tattoo on your name on her lord back. I've
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: seen that. H it's a dorsy right there. Who whoa
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa? Hold on, hold on, man,
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: you're telling me you haven't seen the tattoo on her back?
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: Is that what you talk? Lower? Back? Man? Right right
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: right right on above or telephone? Yeah, I've seen it. Dorsey?
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: Your name Dorsey? Right? Man? Who them is this? Man?
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: What's your real name? Hey? Man? They calm down? Man?
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: Are you Are you cool with you call my phone?
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: Are you school? With the schedule changing? That is what
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: I'm asking? What are you cool with her schedule change?
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: And you see what I'm saying. Her schedulere gonna come
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: back to normal once lit is old with. I gave
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: up messing around with her for Lyn, but not for
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: your man. I'm not cool with the thing. I'm about
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: to be cool in your face in a minute. Now,
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: tell me your name, tell me your number and your
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: real address, and we're gonna talk about our lives in person. Okay,
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: all right? What my name? What's your name? My name
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: Tommy man? Okay, now we're getting somewhere. Tell me what
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: I mean? I mean, why you need my last name?
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: Because I'm feeling to come see you. What you mean
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: why I need your last name? Hold on, hold on,
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: somebody get in you on the phone. Hey, hold on,
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: don't nowhere. We're gonna get ange on the phone right
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: now and we're gonna settle this right now. Hold on,
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: you're on the phone. Callor callor for real? Yep, Tommy,
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: who what's your scared up? Okay? Man? They call me
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: nephew Tommy? Oh who my name? Nephew Tommy from Steve
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show? What na? She didn't set me up? Man? Man,
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: your wife got me the pray call you man, she
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: tells yourself. I left. I just left the house, called him. Nah.
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: That's why Saint ass in the phone. It was over
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: for you. Man. Y'all come on, man, y'all wrong for
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: this man. This needs to be against the loud man. Man,
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: I gotta ask you, baby, what's the baddest radio show
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: in the land? Man, Steve Harvey Morning Show. I guess
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: you're listening show, all right? Steam So you have another
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: one for telling you about this girl I was dating
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: that had all these roaches and it was an infestation.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: She loved she was fine, and uh, you know, winn
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: no cell phones back then. So my boy, biggie Wig.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: I told Biggie Wig to come and pick me up
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: at a certain amount of time. I said, as a
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: matter of fact, Wig, I'll call you at your house
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: if something changed thirty minutes before one o'clock and let
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: you know if I need a little bit more time
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: or not. So I went in there. We're playing cards.
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: Roaches is everywhere. It lights on and anyway, they ain't
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: nobody in on them rushing, but this way they stayed.
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: You're playing cards, and I know it's too many of
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: them many here. And I didn't got up off the
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: couch to play cards because I just they was on
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: the couch, They was on the coffee table, They walked
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: across TV screen. They was just everywhere. So I figured,
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: least let me set up in a wooden shell with
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: four legs on it the lisamount of exposure. I already
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: got cuffs in these bail bottoms I got. I got
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: the damn there, make cool locks out of these to
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: them because I got them two inch cuffs in these
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: bail bottoms. I know they're in here. Yeah, I don't
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: get here. Were in here? Come in? Yeah, they're looking
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: for a route. So I mean they're just playing cards.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: Theatre everywhere. I'm just flicking them, you know, just picking
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: them off with the cards and hands. Comes. And the
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: girl's sisters was real nice. They was hood, but there
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: was some nice girl. But larding girls talk trash when
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: they played cars. So we're there, we're just custom each other. Yeah,
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: you know I've been. I've never been more bees according
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: to women playing. Look at you, little skinny, be what
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: you're gonna do. So I'm then there. Well, we just
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: talking tracks. So I look up at the clock and
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: I said, let me go on in here and call
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: B and tell him I'll be ready about one thirty.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: I'm happy, man, I forgot the call. These roaches. It's
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: one am now day in full blast. I don't know
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: what it is about one am. Yeah, but roaches. I
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: don't know if it's clubs. They was all out for
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: dinner that night. They were strolling. They was with their family.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: You know, we were playing music. So there was out
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: at the club. The club that was going to dinner.
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: I was in the park. I don't know what they happening.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: Roaches was everywhere I'm talking about. Listen to me when
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: I tell y'all, there was nowhere you could look and
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: you didn't see a roach. Wo, so cool. All of
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: a sudden the doughebell rang and her sister jump up
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: and said, I got it. We're playing spades, so it's
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: my plate. So I said, I got to get to
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: this dope because I got to tell its full biggie
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: wig big when you come in here, listen, they got
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: a roach problem. I liked the girl. Don't embarrass him,
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: just act like you' see. I had a whole screech o.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: A matter of fact, when I called him thirty minutes before,
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: I was gonna tell him, yeah, because here a good brother.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: Well when you don't want him though, it wasn't no texting,
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: ain't no cell phone. I just didn't go. So next
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: thing I know, she at the door. So by the
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: time I make my play, all I hear is at
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: the door. Damn here he's here to tell him what
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: the And then and this is all you here he
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: out there in the four just spooping. I'm still and
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: I'm standing at just looking at him and the and
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: the sisters is mortified. I was here here, I'm talking,
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: God ran here it I'm only one CD. And y'all
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: don't see the man. He's blinking he blaces everywhere else. Yeah, ye,
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: ain't wonder loud. Now he calling me. I'm six feet away,
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: but his dog he don't see me. Ain't wonder loud.
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: Just sit here, man like you don't stop. So he's
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: shaking his coat, flipping his collar. He knocking him off
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: the wall. He didn't pull his head off. Now he
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: got a gangster prim right in a massive goat. So
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: he pulls his hat off and he just wash water
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: ny all on the wall. Man, he's mother blanks everyone ya.
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: They don't see that? Insteady asking them, girl, y'all don't
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: see this. I'm standing there with my arms folding, just
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: you MILLI ate it. Roach, Oh god, fell off the
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: ceiling and landed on his heel. He reached out with
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: blad man mother blakes, and I'm just standing there looking
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: at him and hearing my y'all back in the stone here.
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: I just went on told the girl, I said, I said, hey,
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: excuse me, hey, let me get him a cough. And
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: you knew it was the end that was. I kissed
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: the girl on the cheek. I tell big, I said,
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: come on, man, let's go. Yeah, hell yeah, man, Damn,
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: I don't know how you're sitting up in him. You
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: see these Muhammad over their head down. Everybody head just
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: ain't down because he'd have made a sin. So we
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: get out to the car. Huh, so we stand that. Sorry,
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: say look you good, I said big you have to
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: make all that man. Damn that man. Let's shake off
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: many and flip your cups in your bear walk you know,
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: good hair wearing. So we outside. Damn they're undressed. I
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: just got the vote. Vote dog, I can't get nothing
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: in right. That was wow over the girls house with
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: the roaches. God, Yes, coming out more of the Steve
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show right after this. You're listening Steve Harvey
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Morning Show. Right now? Tell me what is this about?
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: You wanting to help men stay out of trouble? You
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: want to share a little in time one of my boys, Yes, sir,
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: one of my boys. Are you talking about this? This
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: wouldn't be from somebody who stays, you know he wants
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: to help men, okay out of trouble. Imagine things and
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: you notice you you you, you come on nine. There's
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: certain things that can get you in trouble that you
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: need to be aware of. Certain little items that can
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: get you in trouble. Receipts. You don't keep receipts, burn
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: all your receipts. These are things that you must know
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: if you're gonna be player. Player, Damn you get rid
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: of the no receipts receipts for you. You can, you can,
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: you can't write off Okay, no stuff, got to take it.
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: You gotta take the faith for the team. All right,
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: watch this and everybody liked to keep one or two
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: on their phone pictures get rid of than the dog
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: gone pictures. That right, it's shrewd everdence that your buck
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: can get caught. Helly, absolutely, now here go one from
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: my uncle's book, glitter. Glitter will get everything. Keep. You
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: can't have no glitter on you because you can't see
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: the certain angles. Yeah. Boy, back in two thousand, I
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: can't work one morning for two days in a row.
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: Sirley was going, you need to really need to get
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: somebody's glitter. Yes, answer, hold on, you went to work, yes, Shirley.
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: Shirley said, Steve, really really glitter all in my hell everywhere.
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: It was everywhere. But you act like on my neck?
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: Would you coming to work out like you ain't did nothing?
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: She said, Steve, what is this all on you. Huh.
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: And you know what, you can take two three showers
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: and glitter. You cannot get the glit off. This one
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: is one junior shouldn't know when you have a count
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: you had that package and tear that cone off. That
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: little coner got to get to the trade that little
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: cone because they're all no more conas like that. That
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: conal halls it a matter of fact. Don't tad off
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: and leave it attached to the back. Don't tear it off.
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: Don't come out tad off ninety eight percent of it. Yeah,
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: been a lot of divorces. Yeah, women are detectives. You
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: just take the little teen teen teen. Listen to me.
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: Your your woman can't have short hair and you got
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: long hair in the scene. You know what I'm saying. Oh,
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: you're dead. You're so freaking dead. You're trying to put
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: that on your body. That's from me. You tea something.
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: Don't have an eye land in your tooth? Have you have?
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: You had that already? Man, they're gonna I had a
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: whole our lash in the front, ain't you, Steve? Huh?
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: And they're just smiling. What's happening? You know? We don't
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: miss anything, you know, that they do not. Okay, now
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: here's another one. What a bobby pin can break up
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: a relationship? I'm just telling yeah, you have no reason
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: to have a bobby pin in your house, your head.
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: Ah you all earring back right? Oh that's yeah, that's
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: a good one. Yeah, that's really small. They leave the Yeah,
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: they leave them. Yes, they do. Take another one too.
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: Her jacket can't be left in your cloth. Jack you
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: got and if if she do, you got to burn
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: this jacket. So who jacket is this? You didn't even
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: know who's in now what? Wait a minute, I know
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: you didn't burn my jacket on the pillar. Oh they
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: got to be washed right after. Make up any of
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: that on the pillow, Burn that pillar to This is
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: Tommy with his advice to mend to stay black tip
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: off the end of a high heel shoe. Can all
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: of that bags from a store that you know dog on? Well,
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: that ain't where you shopping that bag right there? You
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: know how people take a bag folding up when they're
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: gonna use it later, put it on the cart. Huh
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: that bag? Get rid of that bag for you? Okay,
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: I got one elite press on the nail. Nail they
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: stay yeah, more popular than ever. Empty egg and I
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: got busted with that one one time, the eggs. I
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: had an empty egg in the trash one time. Oh yeah,
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: O lord, I couldn't explain. What did you end up saying?
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: You just just kick that one. I had bought it.
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: I had waves back then, and I had bought one
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: for to make my waves set and I had make
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: a wave cat. Oh that was it. Yeah, that was good.
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: That is quick. She didn't buy it, though, but it
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: was a lie. She asked me where the rest of
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: the pennant? Well, where'd you throw them away? Because the
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: egg is in the try right right? I threw him
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: out the window. Yeah. It was a good line, but
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: it didn't work. I know. Fell over the next day
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: with some panted holes on trying to prove my cake. Oh,
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: Julia told a whole tv'all off the wall, boy, come
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: on you come on your tv V. I'm told a
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: whole flat screen al, thank you, coming up more of
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: the Steve Harvey Morning Show right after this. You're listening
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: to the Steve Morning Show and it's time now to
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: play around of would you rather let's just jump right in,
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: would you rather have the details of your financial life
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: or your love life made public? Show all the money.
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, we got I'm going on these banks
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: see everything. M y sir, and the quiet one, the
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: rich man. Would you, who's very quiet? Would you rather
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: have the details of your financial life or of your
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: love life be made public? Yeah? And we're waiting, deep breathing,
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: Go ahead and jump you tell people jump either way? Yeah,
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: you do what it don't matter, you don't really matter.
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: Or go to prison for four years. It's that option. No,
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: there's no SERI. You're willing to go to prison? Deep anyway?
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: You anyway? So I probably have to go on it.
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: Do the money. Yeah, yeah, I had to go and
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: show the money. What hure? Why we don't ask y'all?
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: Why we don't ask you all these questions? Sometime? Because
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: for the comedians on this, Yeah, okay, that's why. Rather,
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't get you know nothing about me. I want
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: to see he going over it in his going to
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: pay fifteen and look at this on the fifth row,
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: be a shocks. Where was y'all have your finances? Yeah?
• 36:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah for the next next for the field, Oh we're
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: getting out of this one. Okay. Would you rather? Uh?
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: Would you I'd rather know the questions ahead attack Would
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: you rather eat pizza or ice cream as the only
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: food for eternity? Pick one? Would you rather eat pizza? Pizza,
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: pizza piz. I love ice cream and I'm topping yeah.
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: Soon as I get up in the morning, I got
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: to eat some day lunch. I'm running out of favor
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: rich or something. They're both dairy. All right, thanks guys,
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: that's today's edition of would you Rather You're Listening? Show?
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: All right, here we go for ask the Cello. This
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: one is from Julio and DeSoto, Texas. Julio says, I'm
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: a forty seven year old man and I've never been married,
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: and I don't have any children. My brother's got married
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: in twenty eighteen and a double ceremony. I have a
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: domestic partnership with a lady that I've been with for
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: six years. She's never pressured me about a wedding, but
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: she's told my mother she'd love to marry me. Should
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: I stay quiet until she brings it up? Or should
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: I reaffirm to her that I don't want to get married.
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: I hate to be wasting her time. Hey man, why
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: don't you tell her that? Dead? Yeah? Why don't you
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: tell her you don't want to be married and you
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: would just what he called it, domestic partnership partnership. Yeah,
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: but she wants to be married, but you want a
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: domestic partnership. That's why you ain't never been married and
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: ain't gotten I don't feel I'll tell her. I'll tell
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: her for your ass. I'll tell her better man, I
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: will tell her take the weight off of you. But
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: you should have told her that six years ago too. Yeah,
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: you are wasting her time, you know, for six years
• 38:38
  Speaker 1: and she didn't told your mama she want to get married.
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure she hadn't said that to you am
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: a matter of fact, Julio. I can't imagine she would
• 38:45
  Speaker 1: go to your mama with it and ain't saying it
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: to you. I ain't got nothing for you, Julio. You
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: ain't got no kids. You go what you want at
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: forty seven. He's forty seven, Steve, he shouldn't know something now, man,
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: both Felicia. This one's from Felicia in New Orleans. She says,
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: I'm a new luet and my husband and I moved
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: to his hometown recently, where he has three female friends
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: that he's known since childhood. I get along with them,
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: but I need him to set some boundaries with them.
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: One of them is a chef, and she insists that
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: he comes over at least once a week to pick
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: up a plate. He loves to rave about how good
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: her food is. My husband will meet up with the
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: women for drinks, and I find out about it after
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: the fact. He says they're like sisters and I have
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: nothing to worry about. He doesn't get it. So should
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: I talk to these ladies directly? No, nope, nope. See,
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: you didn't marry the ladies. You married your husband. You
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: and your husband took to vows to leave all others
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: and cleave only unto you. That was his vows. Now,
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: before you got married, did he tell you, yeah, these girlfriends,
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: he wasn't gonna cut them loose and you married him anyway?
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: Or did you discover the three girlfriends when you moved
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: back to his hometown. M coming over to the house cooking.
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: I can't no where in hell I can go in
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: there and tell Mardie, I'm going over this girl's house
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: for dinner. We're friends. That man, man, you know, that's
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: the next thing. My friend is man Shirley been friends
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: for twenty years. I ain't ever been over to her house,
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: and Lord knows, I wouldn't go over there to eat
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: good because I wouldn't be cooking. Would be even crazy
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: if I said to Mark, I'm going to shirley house
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: to eat. I thought you said Sharley couldn't cook. Something
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: was up? All right? All right, here we go, Rilero
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: and queens like that name Rolero. I moved back to
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: New York after living in my amy for a few years.
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: I bought a small condo, and now that I'm all
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: settled in, I'm miserable because I have a white neighbor
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: that is rude and racist. When he first saw me
• 41:10
  Speaker 1: in the building, he asked me if I was visiting someone,
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: and I told him I lived there. His response was,
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: how is that possible? I ignored him. He doesn't speak
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: in passing and didn't hold a door for me. One day.
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: I'm twenty six years old and I've never encountered racism
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: like this? How should I handle this guy? You've never
• 41:30
  Speaker 1: encountered racism, well, Wilaro, welcome to America. Yeah, it's been
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: here for a while, Laro. The fact that you've never
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: seen it before. Very surprising to me. I know it's
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: gonna take your while to adjust, but he not fitted
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: like your ass for no reason. Now, as a Christian everywhere,
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: you're supposed to love your neighbors. I got that. It
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: did not say you had to likechaem talked to him,
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: play with them, or help them up when they fall
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: down the steps that you accidentally tripped him. Hello, that
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: you aid, I'm sorry, ain't speaking. You ain't even got
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: to say I'm sorry. Wow, all right, thank you. See Elo,
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: you're listening to Day Morning show coming up at the
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: top of the hour about four minutes after. It's my
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: Strawberry letter for today subjects doggie style, lifestyle, not what
• 42:41
  Speaker 1: you think, boy down, boy down, Boy down, Boy down boy. Okay,
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: it is April Fool's Day today though, and the nephew
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: is here with today. What you got? Now? Can you
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: fix my roof? But that don't sound harmful. That's why
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: I said, Oh, okay, that's nice. Yeah, can you fix
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: my roof? That's all I ask? Is it leaking or
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: something that's some issues? I'm saying no, But can you
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: fix my rood? That's all I want to know. Look
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: at my face I know, Carl. I always looking for
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: that hard left. Where you going with it? Though? And
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: it's always there Tommy? Yeah, well, well get ready for
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: the hard left. Here we go. Can you fix my roof?
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: Let's go? Cat dog? Hello, Hello, I'm trying to reach Eduardo. Eduardo,
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: how are you doing? Man? I'm one of your neighbors. Man,
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: I'm actually like two streets over. I wanted to see
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: if you could come around here man and help me out. Man,
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: I gotta leak in my roof. Are you able to
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: come around the corner real quick and see about fixing
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: my roof? Who? Who's this? Yeah? This Sammy? Man? I
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: look like two streets over from you. You're you're Eduardo? Right? Yes? Okay, hey,
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: I need you to I gotta leak in my roof. Man,
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: I wanted to see if you can come around here
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: and tell the little leak in your roof. What does
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: that have to do with me? No? No, I got
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: a leak in it. It doesn't have anything to do
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: with you. But I wanted to see if you could
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: come around here and fix it for me. How did
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: you get my number? Man? What I mean? Or where
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: do you think I'm? I would fix your roof. I
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: got your number from one of the neighbors. But you
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: you you you're you're Hispanic, right? Yeah, I know, I'm
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: I'm Hisspanical. I'm not from my spani I'm Mexican. If
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: that's what you're asking. Yeah, yeah, well what I'm American?
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: Mexican American? I mean, are you are you trying to
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: be funny or what? What are you talking about? Why
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: do I gotta go fix your roof? I mean when
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: you don't don't don't know. Mexican people know how to
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: do rules. You know what? Man, don't talk to me
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: like that. I'm an educated Mexican. I'm your worst nightmare.
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: Who do you do? Who? Who do you think you
• 44:48
  Speaker 1: can call me? Because I think it all Mexican fixed roofs.
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: And listen here, I'm not a roofer. I work at
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: a bank. Okay, you understand that. I understand you work
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: at a bank. But from I understand and then all
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: Hispanic people, I mean, what do you what do you?
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: What do you do with the bank? I mean you late?
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: Do you lay pile at a bank? What do you?
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: What do you do with the bank? Listen to you, ignorant,
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: I work at a bank. I'm a loan officer. I
• 45:12
  Speaker 1: am a dangerous I'm a Mexican with good credit. Okay,
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: I'm a dangerous Mexican. You put the wrong person. Are
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: you that stupid? Huh? What is the matter with your school?
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: Who gave you my number? Where do you live? You
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: can't be one of my neighbors. I haven't seen a
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: retarded person walking around my neighborhood. Ladies, I'm two streets
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: over from you. Man, I'm I'm like I said, I
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: got a leak in my room and somebody gave me
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: your number. I thought all Hispanic people knew how to
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: fix rooms. Oh really, maybe if I don't cut your
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: classic taking the scale type of huh, would that be cool? Huh?
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: Why don't you come over to Mary? I'll tell you what. Look,
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: I man, you you you're taking this. You're taking this
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: the wrong way. I'm trying to give you some work. Man,
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to what all. I really wanted to see
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: if you could come over here and fix the leak.
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, That's that's really all I
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: wanted to do it. I heard, you know, the mostly
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: Hispanic people. You know all y'all most to know how
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: to do rufe? I mean, are you? Are you kidding me? Man?
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: You stupid? I work at a bank. I've got a degree.
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: You didn't hear me. You're one of them ignorant to
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: don't listen anything. I live in a nice neighborhood, man,
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: what do you do? You sell drugs to live in
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: this neighborhood. You pieces, look at this. You're making me
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: degrade myself by just talking to you. I don't do tyle.
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: I don't do construction. I don't fix rules. I'm not
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: a mechanic. I don't do yards. Okay, do you steal?
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong with being a construction worker for lane
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: brick or doing tile or doing rufe. And there's nothing
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: wrong with that. Man. I got a lot of relatives.
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: I've done those jobs myself, but I educated myself. Now
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: I've got a degree, and I work at a bank
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: as a loan officer. Don't you with me? Don't you
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: ever call me again? Hey? Hey, hey, I need English, Man,
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: I need English English? You what what what are you saying? Man?
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: What are you saying? Hey? Man? Don't don't be upset
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: because I speak too languages and you speak what Oh,
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: you can probably speak pig lattin or something like that.
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: You know this. You don't what, man, I don't even
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: I don't even like to talk like this. I've worked
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: at a bank. I gotta deal with customers every day,
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: and I deal with ignorant. I don't even like I
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: deal with ignorant, not a daily basis like you do.
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: They got playing with it, h man. I grew up
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: on the West Side. You need you need to watch
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: your tone. Okay, man, you hey, man, let me let
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: me let me ask you this though. Do you know Julio?
• 47:33
  Speaker 1: Do you know Julios? Yeah, I know Julios. That's that's
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: my curtain. Man. What does he have to do with Okay, okay,
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: Julio is the one that told me to call you.
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: This is nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey Morning Show. Man.
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: Your cousins just got me the prank phone call you
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: nah man? I nah dude, naw man, that's what and what? Yeah? Man,
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: I listened to that show man. Y'all got me, man, Well,
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: I was ready to be a real mESC from the hood. Man. God, Holly,
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: you all right, man? You got me? Man, I was
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: gonna go back to be let my cousin boy. Man, Hey, man,
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: I got one more thing as you had war though,
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: what is the baddest and I mean the baddest radio
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: show in the land as Steve Harvey in the morning Man,
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: he got me, Hey Tommy, Tommy, Man, before you go, Man,
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: we'll tell your boy Steve towards the stay seattles with
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: those suits. Man ain't homeboards from the hood. Would love that, man,
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: he'd be one of the homeboys. Many Yeah, yeah, got
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: a problem, man, got what you asked? I told y'all
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: gonna make a hard left. Yeah, look at my face.
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: Play way too much? I know, I know. Just because
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: a man in Spanish does not give you the right
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: to call him and answer fix it's not right. This
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: one was not having it. I worked at the bank. Yeah,
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: you know what, it's my job. Sure, it's my job.
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: How many people, surely do you know it's the job
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: to be stupid? How many people you know? Oh, but
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: there's a lot of people being stupid that we know.
• 49:30
  Speaker 1: But I'm just saying it's my job. Okay, you would
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: do it for free. You do it for free. Why
• 49:40
  Speaker 1: are you Why are you trying to bring my paycheck down?
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: Are you trying to do that. You're not. You ain't
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: gonna from my stupid You can't help it. Tom all
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: racialized crossing. I'm crossing. I don't. I do not discriminate.
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: I am, I am not racist. I am hitting everybody.
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: So if you would like me the prank phone, call
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: one of your friends or your pasta or your co
• 50:05
  Speaker 1: worker or whatever. I always throw that in calling you.
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: You have to get the past what I'm saying. And
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: you know what, anybody, they're easy to find because they're
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: home now. So that's good. If you get that whole phone,
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: let me tell you something. If you get that whole phone,
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: you win it. Thomas Miles dot com. Click on the
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: prank button, leave me all your information. I call you,
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: we talk, we get our little story together, we decide
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: what we're gonna do, and the pranking begins. Thomas Miles
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: dot com. Stupidity and it's best. Yeah, yeah, yeah, there's
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: nothing better. Columbia South Calkilaki. Do you live first, baby
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: at the Coger That's right, the Coga Performing Arts Center.
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: The nephew would becoming that spit in the Polish dappa.
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: As you know, funny is all. Get out, get your
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: tickets there on sale right now. That is once again Columbia.
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: Stop kak and lockhead you live first. Think it's on
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: sale right now. You can get them at the box office.
• 51:06
  Speaker 1: You can get them at the ticket masks, I don't know.
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: You can get them around the corner at the bob shop.
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: You can get it at Burger King. I don't care
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: where you get it. You can get it because tickets
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: are on sale right now. Yeah, you know where you know? Anyway?
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: You can drive through they might have them now. Okay,
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: lie through, glide up through Popeyes, get you a two
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: piece of biscuit and U and tell them you want
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: two tickets to see time. I promise you somebody to
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: drive through. Probably got that for you. Okay, all right,
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: thank you, nephew. Come on, it's time now when we
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: come back for the Strawberry Letter, subject doggy style lifestyle.
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: Wait to hear this one, okay, okay, we'll be back
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: with it right after this. You're listening to morning show.
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: All right, guys, time now for today's Strawberry Letter and listen.
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: If you need advice on your relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting,
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve RFM.
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: And click submit Strawberry Letter. It's just that easy. It's
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: just that simple. We could be reading your letter live
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: on the air, just like we're gonna read this one today. Okay, Barcolo,
• 52:12
  Speaker 1: hold on tight, we got it for you here. It
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: is a Strawberry letter, subject Doggie style lifestyle. Dear Stephen Shirley.
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: I am a twenty seven year old woman and I
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: just moved in with my boyfriend. We've been dating for
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: one year and we have a great relationship. But of
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: course there's an issue, or I wouldn't be writing you.
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: I love making is very good, but we are never alone.
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: When we're intimate, there's always four extra eyes very close by,
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: staring at us. It's his dog. He has a Doberman
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: and a German Shepherd, and these dogs are very spoiled
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: and run the house. When my boyfriend and I get
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: in the bed, they jump into. Since I moved in,
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: my boyfriend has forced them to sleep on the floor
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: next to our bed. Since I didn't want them in
• 53:06
  Speaker 1: our bed, I have asked them. I have asked him
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: to put the dogs beds in the guest room so
• 53:11
  Speaker 1: they can sleep in there at night. But he says
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: I'm being inconsiderate and silly. He says, they're dogs and
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: they don't understand what we're doing when we're intimate, but
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: it creeps me out. They always come right up to
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: the bed and stare at us the entire time. I
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: have asked my boyfriend over and over to close our
• 53:30
  Speaker 1: bedroom door and keep them out while we have sex,
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: but he says they will wind the entire time and
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: spoil the mood. I think this is very weird. I
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: can't enjoy sex with these two big dogs breathing on us.
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: How can I get them out of our bedroom? Or
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: maybe I should go and let the dog stay. I
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: didn't sign up for this doggie style life. Please help? Wow. Yeah,
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: I agree with you. This is weird. Okay, watching is watching.
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: I don't care if it is dogs watching. I don't
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: care unless you're into that sort of thing, and clearly
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: you're not. This is weird. I mean, I think your
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: man should definitely put his dogs in another room or
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: give them something to do while you guys are doing it.
• 54:15
  Speaker 1: I think that's only normal. I mean, I know people
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: love their dogs, and they're crazy about their dogs, and
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: they treat them like people and all of that, but
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: this right here is ridiculous. You're uncomfortable, you know, it
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: makes you feel creeped out and everything. I think he's
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: being disrespectful to you, putting the dogs above you. I
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: think he is, you know, because since you're officially moved
• 54:40
  Speaker 1: in now you know, I know, it hasn't been that long.
• 54:42
  Speaker 1: It's only been about a month or so, you say,
• 54:45
  Speaker 1: But guess what, it's your house too, so you get
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: to say something about you know, how you want your
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: house to be run. You're the woman of the house.
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: That means you shouldn't be uncomfortable in your own home.
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: You shouldn't be uncomfortable in this relationship. It sounds like
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: he's disregarding your feelings. You don't want the dogs in
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: there during intimacy. He doesn't seem to have a problem
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: with it. Is this a deal breaker to you? If
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: it is, you're gonna have to keep it moving, Steve. Well, well,
• 55:15
  Speaker 1: well let me just say this right here, if we
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: really in here, tell out some damn dog. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: they were were talking about in the bedroom dog. Now
• 55:30
  Speaker 1: twenty seven year old ladies. She'd moved in with a boyfriend.
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: They've been dating for a year. They got a great relationship.
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: But like she said in her letter, you know, something
• 55:39
  Speaker 1: gotta be wrong that I wouldn't be writing y'all. I
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: love making this very good, but we're never alone. It's
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: always extra eyes, very close by. And it's two damn dogs.
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: Now these ain't chasing you know, you know shit suits
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: and these ain't little pick a knees Jesus Germans shepherds
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: and dobleman. Yeah, they took damn big ass dogs. Now
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: all up in the here. You got these big dogs
• 56:14
  Speaker 1: in your house and you want them in the other room.
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: Now you had your you had your boyfriend kick him
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: out the bed. I didn't understand that they're getting up
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: in the bed now they ain't. Why we stay get
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: in the floor, his sheets, his best bread steak. Because
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: she let me explain something to you. Dogs smell like dogs.
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: I don't kill who the hell you bathe them every day?
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: Dogs still smell like dogs. Now, as soon as you
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: bathe them, they're okay. But don't let the hand run
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: outside and come back in. They goes outside and gets
• 56:50
  Speaker 1: a lot of dogs on them, and now they back
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: in the house. So now you want them in the
• 56:56
  Speaker 1: other room. You ask him to do that he says,
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: you're being inconsiderate. Wow, okay, Now, how is your man
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: and is he stupid? Don't you think they're around the
• 57:10
  Speaker 1: same age? How is your man and is he stupid?
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: To tell your woman you being inconsiderate? Now, Shirley said
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: it right. Because you're the woman of the house. You
• 57:22
  Speaker 1: can't be uncomfortable in your own home ever. Ever. A
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: woman should never be uncomfortable in her home. Ever. I
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: got news for you. A man should never be uncomfortable
• 57:39
  Speaker 1: in their home ever. And your children deal with it.
• 57:48
  Speaker 1: But even a child wants to come home and be comfortable.
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: I don't care if it's just in their room. Everybody
• 57:55
  Speaker 1: wants a place where they can go and be comfortable.
• 57:58
  Speaker 1: But the dogs can ain't have to run at the house.
• 58:01
  Speaker 1: Shirley's absolutely right. You deserve to have comfort in your
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: home and you can get it. I'm just gonna tell
• 58:10
  Speaker 1: you what's gonna happen during end of this thing if
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: we don't get the dogs out. I'm gonna just can
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: I wake up the other night with your Doberman licking
• 58:23
  Speaker 1: your hand? Man, it freaks you out. My damn, this
• 58:28
  Speaker 1: shot him through that sitting like Tom and Jay and
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: a cat carton. All right, we'll have part two if
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: Steve's response coming up in twenty three after the hour
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: subject I'm the Strawberry letter today doggie style lifestyle right
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: after this you're listening to show. All right, come on,
• 58:46
  Speaker 1: let's recap today's Strawberry letters. Steve y seven year old
• 58:51
  Speaker 1: man Tyler letter, is what your doggie style lifestyle? Wow?
• 58:56
  Speaker 1: She got moved in with a boyfriend. Been there for you.
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: Dogs is getting on the nerves because when they intimate,
• 59:02
  Speaker 1: the ain't never in the ruin by themselves there and
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: they're watching crying. Now she wants dogs to be put out.
• 59:11
  Speaker 1: He didn't told a girl he ain't putting them out
• 59:13
  Speaker 1: because she being inconsiderate and silly. What you think the
• 59:19
  Speaker 1: dog think? The dog don't even know what's happening. I
• 59:22
  Speaker 1: promise you that big ass is wanting. What is all
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: this moaning? What is all is driving? Why y'all naked?
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: You're fitting the heels. Next thing you know, you're gonna
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: have a dog moving in clothes because dogs like to sniff. Nah,
• 59:40
  Speaker 1: I'm just telling you facts about dogs. That's their primary sense.
• 59:45
  Speaker 1: It's not feel, it's smell and taste. They gonna eventually
• 59:50
  Speaker 1: comes sniffing around. Now I'm a little edgy when the
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: dog is sniffing me with my clothes on. Now I'm
• 59:58
  Speaker 1: somewhere ass naked. Well, I can't have is that little
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: cold ass nose touch me? You know the nose be cold? Yeah,
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: you on your back and all of a sudden you
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: feel this little cold dot on your ass. We really
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: need this visual. Yeah, you need this visual because we
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 1: gotta get the dogs out this rule. Now I'm trying
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: to help this lady wrote this letter. Now you think
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: you're tripping right now. That's because they ain't moved in
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: to participate. But them dogs is fitting to participate. Oh
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: we played they thank y'all in the planning. They're gonna
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: want in on that. That's gonna start with the breathing.
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 1: Then it's gonna go to sniffing. They're gonna be smelling
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 1: your breath either. Now he might be all right with
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 1: that because he know how it probably had a little
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 1: cold nose on his ass before. I'm telling you he has.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 1: He's been in that house with these dogs. You inconsider
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 1: you silly because he's softable. Yeah, he comfortable. They've been
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 1: in the back before she moved in. He's slepperty two,
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 1: big ass dog. They was taking in. My damn dog
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: smell like a dog. He got bad breath. Make go
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 1: get away from me. There are a lot of dog lovers,
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 1: Steve Dog, you can be a dog lover. This is
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: my joke. My joker is for people that ain't dog lovers.
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 1: This is my joke. Is not fun. Dog lovers, you
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: might not. I don't think that's fun at all. But
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: how high it is to me? She says, they're very
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: spoiled and they run the house. Hell yeah, they spoiled,
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 1: they run the house. But now here, come on. See
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: now we didn't breathed, and we'n sniff I ain't got
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: none to tell you said it wasn't next Now, okay,
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: if we hadn't done all the breathing and all the sniffing,
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: tell me what you have seen your dog do that
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: makes you uncomfortable? And every body is uncomfortable with it,
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: even a dog lover. How many times you've been sitting
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: up there eating your plate and you look over there
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 1: and he snash. It's going to town man. Because Marjorie
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 1: loves dog, But damn bad. Sometimes we get in front
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 1: of that fireplace, and ain't nobody looking? And Bad just
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 1: started looking everywhere, and now Marjorie don't want a damn
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 1: dog no more? Stop it. Bad and Bad be looking
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: up like what do stop? And I'm looking at him going,
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 1: oh my god. Yeah, if I could do that, you
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 1: could do? What if I could do what my dog dog?
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 1: God to myself? You know the moments I would have
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: been in hat You're so crazy, Steve, where you at?
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 1: I ain't coming in today's happening. I'm busy. I'm doing
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 1: it though. So now I ain't said nothing nasty. I'm
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 1: not said nothing cruel. I'm allowing you to write your
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 1: own joke on your way to work. But we all
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 1: know what our dogs do that embarrass us. Yeah, well
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 1: he gonna walk up to you and really embarrass you.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: He said, Wait a minute, old Oh, everybody got the oh, oh,
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 1: everybody got the ears out. Now, Oh, there's what we're doing. First,
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: he's gonna start with jess itself. Oh, then what we're doing.
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 1: Dogs are smart. You've got to get these dogs out
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: of your bedroom because eventually they're gonna want to make
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 1: the want to participate. Is this a deal breaker? I
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 1: think it is now here's what I think you could do,
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 1: young ladies. This is I think you can solve the problem.
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 1: You're going to have to issue an ultimatum. Either you
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 1: put the dogs out of the bedroom and get comfortable
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 1: and make them get okay with being in the room.
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 1: They're gonna learn to stop the whining. They're gonna stop,
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: and if you don't get them used to it, then
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: you're gonna hear my wine and we're gonna see which
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 1: one of these you like better, the dogs wine than
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: my wine, because my wining comes with consequences. I'm not
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 1: making love anymore in front of these damn dogs. I'm
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 1: not doing it now. I want to be with you,
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 1: but I'm not doing it anymore in front of these dogs. Period. Secondly,
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: if that don't work, here comes the other ultimatum. Either
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: you put the dogs out, I'll go out. Let me
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 1: go back to where I was until the dogs can
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: sleep on their own. Because all you want to say
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: have privacy. You didn't ask the man to get rid
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 1: of the dogs. You just ask him to move the
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 1: dogs around. So those are the ultimatums. I can't do
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 1: this anymore with these dogs. I'm uncomfortable. Call me silly
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: if you want to. But I tell you who really
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 1: gonna look silly? You aren't there with them damn dogs
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 1: and y'all looking at each other now they can lick themselves,
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 1: you can't. I got If we gotta get out of here,
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 1: email us or instagram us your thoughts on today's Strawberry Letter.
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 1: It's Steve Harvey. F M. You're listening, all right? Come on?
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: Steve introduced Jay as he murders another Jay, are brown
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 1: all right to day's here. It's very it's very dead
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: to me. And I got this from my buddy Steve.
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: He said, my wife, Uh wear's the damn capri pants
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: all the time, and he's really sick of it. Could
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: you write a song letting some of these ladies know
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: that you you can't win these pants all damn time.
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 1: Check it up, girls a sexy all that meet on
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: the mountains. Some outfits look good on y'all. Some us
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 1: you leave alone. Well, I mean to let you know,
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: girl on stairrund acut someone rest or tape battle grief.
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 1: As long as those pants a long leads, no blood
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: side compriess, God, no one batch. You was the seed
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 1: of that blow. Your knees. They look at up none
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 1: on knees. Those pants don't have set some people. But hey,
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 1: that's his me. You willing too much like six time voe,
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: So do me a favorite girl. Won't you burn the
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 1: comprim to you? Please? So long as that's sicking time,
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 1: Presa should have a right to me. You got you
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 1: got it. You've gotta stop windows compete says to please
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 1: the wearing No one like fire. Hey you really were
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 1: a singer and your yes and you're done said it?
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 1: He did sleep, He did say it. You just roll
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 1: said earlier, not them to make sick dabe. You didn't
• 1:08:06
  Speaker 1: lose any friends on that junior. He didn't lose any
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 1: friends on that one. But next week you're listening to
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 1: show all right, time for comedy roulette, now, okaja, this
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 1: is always on you set it up, please him. Let
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 1: me do this every week. You give us some subjects,
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 1: because you guys test our comedy ability to put five
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 1: subjects on the wheel. Spind the wheel, wedge. Stop, We
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 1: will do the damn thing. What you got? What you got?
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: All right? Here we go, first subject, dang dog, while
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: your pants so high, that's good too. It's all you
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 1: can eat. But not at one time. Okay, here's number three.
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 1: Dang girl, that's way too much lip gloss. Okay, no, no, no, no,
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 1: don't take these first one, noa okay, number four, you
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 1: need to just cut the rest of that hair on
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 1: off like that one, all right? And number five, that's
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 1: not a manly dog. That's not a manly dog. Dang girl,
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 1: that's way too much lip bloff. Let me tell, let
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 1: me shot your You know you got on too much
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 1: lip bluff. When I see you and I can see
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 1: my reflection and I'm thinking to myself, Lord, I wish
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 1: I had a squeege you. You know what I'm telling, Yeah,
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 1: what you got nip. I don't really like saying this,
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 1: but I've had this happened before. I've been in a
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 1: situation if I'm trying to kiss you and you gotta
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 1: way too much nipplof we can't kiss because I keep sliding.
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 1: I keep sliding off your mouth because it's way too
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 1: much lip cloth. Let me take some of this off,
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 1: way too much. It's way too much lip bloff. When
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 1: you eat a chicken leg and take one bite, but
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 1: the rest of the leg is pink all around the leg,
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: Come on, man, you gotta take some of that down.
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 1: That's way too much lip bloves. Man, you got on
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 1: too much lip bloss. If it looked like slob, you
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 1: can't tell that too. You know you got on too
• 1:10:42
  Speaker 1: much lip bloss when your lips is leaking on the
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 1: flat right on the side and just dripping back. One time,
• 1:10:54
  Speaker 1: sit on so much red liploss. What I wanted to know,
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 1: I said, Damn, who hit you in the mouth? You
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 1: don't just hit my girl? All right, all right, all right,
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 1: all right. You know you gotta weigh too much little gloves.
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 1: When I walk in the room and everybody got your
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 1: lip blows on because you didn't kiss them, everybody wearing it, Now,
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 1: that's a lot of gloves. If you're talking and it
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 1: didn't look like somebody flashes on, you know you got
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 1: on a lot of lip blow. When you open your
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 1: mouth you make a bubble, it's a lot of lip blocks.
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 1: That's a lot of I tell you right now, you
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 1: got on a lot of lip glossies. If I look
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 1: at you and I see flies trapp stuffed up around
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 1: your mouth, you didn't trap the much of flat would?
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 1: I said, A lot of that? Way too much? Uh?
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 1: You know you wear too much lived loth if anything
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 1: we said and pissed you out, and I'm only a man,
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 1: why didn't tell? The man means you know who you are?
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 1: You all right? Thanks guys, always, we'll be back. You're
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 1: listening to Harvey Morning Show. I think all of us
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 1: have this fear, uh if we work this shift, this
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 1: morning shift, over sleeping and being late for work. I don't.
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 1: You don't have that fear. I do? Uh So, So
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 1: the question is how many alarms do you set in
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 1: the morning to make sure you're on time for work?
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 1: I got two? You have two alarms? To Tommy, yeah,
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 1: I have two. You don't have that fear, Steve that
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 1: if we oversleep, if we see daylight for us, it's day.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 1: I just did that the other day. I just did
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 1: it the other day. Woke up mad at you guys
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 1: because you didn't call me. I ain't know since a
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 1: Russian if you see that daylight, ain't since morning radio. Right. No,
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 1: I woke up one time and saw daylight. I knocked
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: the lamps over and everything sail over the rug. Right,
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 1: So you say you set to Tommy Carl, you said too,
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 1: what about you, junior foe? You set four. Okay, I
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 1: usually don't set the alarm, but if I do, I
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 1: only need you one. I just wake up. I'm up early.
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 1: But June a poor. Yeah, well you know I got it. Yeah,
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 1: I gotta do three. Tip of your chicks. I got
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 1: all kinds of stuff like I got to do first.
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 1: You most Americans set four alarms, most of them four
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 1: most Americans. But let's see that people don't like their job.
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 1: We'll have more of the Steve Harvey Morning Show coming
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 1: up at thirty three minutes after we'll play a round
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 1: of would you rather? Right after this. You're listening to
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 1: morning show and it's time now to play around of
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 1: would you rather? Let's just jump right in. Would you
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 1: rather have the details of your financial life or your
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 1: love life made public? Show you all the money? Oh yeah, yeah,
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 1: we're gon we're going on these banks. You can see everything.
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 1: M h, sir and the quiet one, the rich man.
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 1: Would you who's very quiet? Would you rather have the
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 1: details of your financial life or of your love life
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 1: do made public? Yeah? And we're waiting, deep breathing, Go
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 1: ahead and jump to tell people jump either way? Yeah
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 1: you do? Wait what it don't matter, You don't really matter,
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 1: or go to prison for four years. It's that option. No,
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 1: there's no SERI prison. You're willing to go to prison
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 1: deep anyway, So I probably have to go on it.
• 1:15:53
  Speaker 1: Do the money? Yeah he came. What Yeah, I had
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 1: to go and show the money. But what I'm why
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 1: we don't ask y'all. Why we don't ask y'all these
• 1:16:06
  Speaker 1: questions sometimes because it's for the comedians on the Yeah, okay,
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: that's why I wouldn't get and then you know nothing
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 1: about me. I don't want to ask. Did he going
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 1: over it in his mask? Was to pay his fifteen
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 1: and look at this on the fifth row? Ll be
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 1: a shock? What wh was y'all have your finances? Yeah? Yeah,
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 1: the next next quarter? Fear, Oh we're getting out of
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 1: this one. Okay. Would you rather? Would I'd rather? Would
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 1: you rather eat pizza or ice cream as the only
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 1: food for eternity? Which one? Pick one? Would you rather eat? Pizza? Pizza?
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 1: I love ice cream, but I'm topping. Yeah, soon as
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 1: I get up in the morning, I gotta eat some
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 1: damn ice cream. I'm running out or something. All right,
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 1: Thanks guys. That's today's edition of Would You Rather? Coming
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 1: up at forty nine minutes after the hour, it is
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 1: our last break of the day, and of course we
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 1: will have some closing remarks from our fearless, fearless leader,
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 1: the one and only Steve Harvey right after this. You're
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 1: listening to Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, Steve, last
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 1: break of the day. Wow, what a wild ride today anyway,
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 1: but now it's always you're here with your closing remarks. Yeah.
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 1: My closing remarks today is I want to remind everyone
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 1: about the things you're going through. I want to remind
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 1: you about some of the things that's happening to you,
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 1: especially for those of you that are hurting. Everybody is hurting.
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 1: All of us are sick with something. All of us,
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 1: every living human being. Nobody is pure and clean. No
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 1: one is pure and clean. No one is without hurt,
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 1: no one is without pain, no one is without suffering.
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 1: All of us are hurting some kind of way. It's
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 1: because that's life. That's life, man. Now, how we handle
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 1: the hurt, the pain, and the suffering, that depends on
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 1: how our mental state is. I've often said it before.
• 1:19:12
  Speaker 1: If you change your attitude, you change your altitude. If hurt,
• 1:19:17
  Speaker 1: pain and suffering are a part of life. Then it
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 1: must be how you handle the hurt, pain and suffering
• 1:19:26
  Speaker 1: that determines the outcome of a lot of it. So
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 1: this today is for the hurting. This message today is
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 1: for people in pain. This message today offer people who
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 1: are suffering. I say this to you because I fit
• 1:19:44
  Speaker 1: in all three of these categories. Oftentimes it regardless is
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 1: what you was, Steve, how you in pain, suffering and
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 1: you hurting? You got this and you got that that
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 1: ain't got nothing to do with it. I wish, I
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 1: wish you could make money and that would make your
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 1: life smooth. It don't, I'm telling you right now, I don't.
• 1:20:05
  Speaker 1: So if you think if your money gonna make you happy,
• 1:20:08
  Speaker 1: money does not make you happy, and money does not
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 1: make your life right. It gives you more choices in life.
• 1:20:15
  Speaker 1: It's what it does. What money actually does is it
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 1: takes all emergencies and turns them into mere inconveniences. It
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 1: takes most all emergency. Your car breakdown, that could be
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 1: an emergency in somebody's life. That's not an emergency in
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 1: my life because I can straighten that out. You follow
• 1:20:35
  Speaker 1: what I'm saying that as some things that money can't fix,
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 1: you lose a love one. No amount of money you
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 1: have eases the hurt, the pain, or the suffering. Nothing,
• 1:20:47
  Speaker 1: nothing fixes that. So this message is for the hurt,
• 1:20:52
  Speaker 1: the pain, and the suffering. Here's what you have to understand.
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 1: Everything you're going through is God preparing you for what
• 1:21:02
  Speaker 1: you ask for. If you ask for big stuff, much
• 1:21:06
  Speaker 1: is going to be quiet for you to do. In
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 1: order to attain the big stuff, to whom much is given,
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 1: much is required. And in the requirements that comes some
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 1: pain that comes from suffering, that comes from hurt. Nobody
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 1: going through this life free and clear. You understand me
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 1: so quick, tripping man, because God is processing you. So
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 1: you got to deal with the tests that come, because
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 1: you can't have a testimony without the test. You have
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 1: to deal with the things that are confronting you. And
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 1: that's how you deal with the things that's confronting you
• 1:21:41
  Speaker 1: can determine the outcome. You can't stop nothing that happens
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 1: to you, but you can fix your attitude when it
• 1:21:48
  Speaker 1: does because it's coming. Life's waves and tides and billows
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 1: and storms. They're coming. It's just what you do about it.
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 1: Understand that you are in the process, and when you're
• 1:22:04
  Speaker 1: being processed, I want you to think of your history,
• 1:22:07
  Speaker 1: name me one thing that God hasn't brought you through,
• 1:22:10
  Speaker 1: And if He hasn't bought you through it, he's currently
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 1: pulling you through it. Right now. You have survived far
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 1: more than you thought you could, ever thought you would,
• 1:22:21
  Speaker 1: or ever thought you'd have to. And the reason I
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 1: know is because you can hear me talking right now.
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 1: God's track record with you is outstanding. He has done
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 1: the unthinkable for you time and time again. God has
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 1: delivered you in times when you didn't even think you
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 1: could ever get delivered. He didn't delivered you so many
• 1:22:40
  Speaker 1: times you forgot the delivery date. You just showed up
• 1:22:43
  Speaker 1: and it was all right, and you just forgot to
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 1: thank him that day. But God's track record, he's batting
• 1:22:50
  Speaker 1: a thousand. So while you're being processed, know that this
• 1:22:53
  Speaker 1: too shall pass and you'll be on to something else.
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 1: And He just does what he does over and over again.
• 1:23:01
  Speaker 1: So God is processing you. He ain't through with you yet,
• 1:23:05
  Speaker 1: So quit tripping because God ain't through with you yet.
• 1:23:09
  Speaker 1: You just being processed. You're being tested to see if
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 1: what you really want you're asking him for, it's what
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 1: you really want. Just pass the tests. Keep waking up,
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 1: keep being grateful, keep thinking him, and keep on pushing.
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 1: God has a great life for you if you just
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 1: remember that one thing He is processing you, the things
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 1: you're going through, is preparing you for what you ask for.
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 1: Just keep passing the tests, don't ever give up. The
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 1: reward is coming. It'll be yours. As old people used
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 1: to say, victory, victory shall be mine, It'll be yours.
• 1:23:52
  Speaker 1: I've seen it happen in my life thousands of times,
• 1:23:57
  Speaker 1: when it looks so bad for me, and all of
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 1: a sudden I came through it and on the other
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 1: side the sun was shining. Okay, the same thing as
• 1:24:07
  Speaker 1: in store for you. Just remember God is processing you,
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 1: all right. Stay with it, y'all. Those are my clothes
• 1:24:12
  Speaker 1: were remarks today. Thanks. Huh oh oh oh that was
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 1: good man, m that was good. Well, y'all have a
• 1:24:21
  Speaker 1: great weekend for all. Steve Harvey contests No purchase necessary
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 1: void where prohibited. Participants must be legal US residents at
• 1:24:38
  Speaker 1: least eighteen years old, unless otherwise stated. For complete contest rules,
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 1: visit Steve Harvey FM dot com. You're listening