Latest / Spinning the Light Podcast / Ebb and Flow

Transcript

Ebb and Flow · Spinning the Light Podcast

0:04
Hello and welcome to two girls in a pod.
0:06
I'm Sharon. I'm Christy.
0:08
So happy to be back. We took a little bit of a week
0:13
off for the holidays and hope everybody had a great holiday.
0:17
I think we did. It's really quiet.
0:19
It was really quiet. We did have a friend come and
0:21
visit so that was really nice and it was a pretty quiet
0:24
holiday. It's funny how many people have
0:26
told me that they just had quiet holidays and I think maybe it's
0:30
a time of reset and I don't know, but it was good for us.
0:35
But you know, we were talking the other day and one of the
0:38
things we talked about is, you know, we were talking about
0:41
success and we were and we were talking and it's success on
0:44
every level. It's not business.
0:45
It was even whether it's our house or whatever.
0:50
And you made the comment, it's like ebb and flow.
0:53
Yeah, I mean, I think that we do that as human beings.
0:57
It's natural, but it's amazing to me.
1:00
Like I was saying to you that day, was that how sometimes you
1:05
can be so positive and feel so energized and just feel like
1:10
you're really killing it on top? Of the.
1:12
World. Yeah.
1:13
And then like the next day, something feels off.
1:17
Or that you're not. You're not in that positive
1:20
mindset for whatever reason. And sometimes that place that
1:26
your mind can go to can be so far from where you were the day
1:31
before. I mean, it amazes me because you
1:34
kind of you think about when you're trying to create new
1:38
habits and stuff like that and get and create a new positive
1:40
mindset. You think that once you get to a
1:44
certain place, you're just there and you stay there.
1:47
But that's not how it works. No.
1:49
And I think that's a good point because I think people think,
1:51
you know, if I reach that pinnacle that it stays.
1:56
But you know, one of the things is, is life happens.
1:59
We are having life happen around us all the time.
2:02
That kind of changes that. Yeah, and but what throws me off
2:07
too is, is that even when it's not an event.
2:10
Well, that's how. Far negative.
2:12
The mind can go in one space of time.
2:14
That was the next point, though. Is that the thing that gets in
2:18
the way of us 90% of the time or more?
2:21
It's our own thought process. It's what we start thinking up
2:25
here. And we don't even realize that
2:29
we're doing it. You know, and I don't think
2:31
people sit there and say, oh, I think today I'm going to be
2:33
negative. You know, I don't think that.
2:35
But I think, you know, it's those little thoughts that just
2:38
kind of come in it, You know, they just kind of whiz in and
2:41
whiz out. We're not attaching to them.
2:44
But I think what happens is it's just enough that we have the
2:49
feeling, you know, And then when we have that feeling, we go from
2:55
I'm on top of the world to Dang this is shitty kind of
2:59
mentality. Yeah.
3:01
And I would think that, you know, after you've been
3:04
practicing that positive mindset for so long, it did just seems
3:07
like that you how can you go so far into the depths of, you
3:12
know, just doubting you know or whatever it is?
3:17
Well, I think the other thing is, is that you know it's kind
3:19
of like with I talked with my clients as I said I always look
3:22
what we're doing therapy even what we're looking at is the
3:26
intensity, frequency and duration of something.
3:31
OK. So people sit there and say, I
3:34
still am getting that, yes. But did it feel as intense?
3:39
Did it last? As long do you see what I mean?
3:43
And So what I think then you start to realize is even when
3:47
you go into those moments, it's paying attention.
3:49
In fact, like, Oh yeah, it did happen, but I did realize I was
3:53
there. I didn't give as much focus.
3:56
And then I moved on. But what happens is when we
4:00
don't look at that week by nature, I think people, or I
4:03
don't even know if it's by nature, if it's a creation, then
4:06
we start sitting there thinking everything's negative.
4:10
Then we we go to that place of, Oh my God, I didn't do this, I
4:13
didn't do that. You know, all of those things
4:17
that get in the way of us moving forward.
4:20
Right. Even though once again, you
4:23
know, Oh yeah, I noticed. I did kind of go to that place.
4:27
But before it would have been half a day to get out of it.
4:31
Now, you know, I was there for an hour or whatever.
4:33
That is still what we called progress.
4:35
It's still forward motion and when we are able to identify it
4:40
and then move on from it, we are being more proactive even in
4:43
what we're doing. Yeah, you know, but it's a
4:46
struggle. Yeah, because you still feel
4:49
encumbered by those feelings sometimes.
4:51
But you're right. If you can identify that and
4:53
realize that, yeah, maybe it's not lasting as long or or you
4:58
know, you're not staying so tied to that emotional piece of it
5:01
that you can't get out of it for a week or whatever it is.
5:06
Well, and I think that's that ebb and flow you were talking
5:09
about. You know, I think that realizing
5:13
that life isn't ebb and flow because we're not stagnant, we
5:17
don't stay stationary. And so you know, it's like some
5:21
days we have so many creative thoughts and we, you know, we're
5:24
just boom, boom, boom, bouncing them off and doing it.
5:26
And then some days it's like, what's going on up there?
5:30
I think that it's a really cool thing, having all of those
5:34
creative ideas and stuff, but we've even talked about how
5:36
sometimes we get so many ideas or that it it becomes
5:40
overwhelming and we're like, Oh my God, where do we start?
5:43
And I just was talking to a client about that and it's like
5:46
you know when you get in that creative process, it is, it's
5:49
like you're bombarded with these things and then you're like oh,
5:51
this sounds like if I do And I and that was and we went, so we
5:55
were going to start doing this is we're going to write these
5:57
down because unfortunately because we get so many coming in
6:02
that that really great idea we lose because of all those other
6:06
fifty ideas that came in and kind of blocked it.
6:09
So it's like even that helps with that, helps us to stay
6:14
focused because then we get discouraged because we don't
6:16
remember that really great idea. Oh my God, that was so good.
6:20
And now I don't remember it. So then that starts that and
6:23
flow process again I think you know so I think it's a lot of
6:27
those things that we that we can change up just a little bit.
6:31
Yeah, well and getting an an idea about how to organize and
6:36
that and definitely like you say writing down.
6:40
I think that has been a huge thing for us.
6:42
We we have really worked on that.
6:46
You know, if we have something in the moment that we're talking
6:48
about, yeah, definitely make a note about it because you do.
6:52
You forget it. And then later on that becomes a
6:54
frustration. And one of the things that I
6:57
know that we talked about in just dealing with that whole ebb
7:01
and flow is being proactive in whatever it is that you're
7:05
doing. When you're planning ahead and
7:08
you're putting it down and you're coming up with a plan.
7:11
How much better that helps you, you know, in the long run?
7:16
Well, and I think too because we we live at a time when we're so
7:21
bombarded, you know, we have so much input.
7:25
It's like constantly input from whether it's you know, 15 people
7:29
talking to you. You're trying to multitask and
7:31
do all these things that we're not as present and and not being
7:35
present and and even though when we're having those
7:38
conversations, we're present in that moment, but we're not
7:40
present with the thoughts or with the ideas.
7:43
So they're kind of coming and going very quickly.
7:47
So that proactive piece is to write it down, to make a plan
7:52
around it. Then it feels as cumbersome as
7:57
you said, or I think anyway, I mean these, this is what's kind
8:01
of cool. I think even for me with the,
8:04
you know, doing a podcast and stuff is because when you start
8:07
out podcasting, nobody's born in a podcaster, right.
8:11
You know what I mean? It really is that thing of we
8:14
sit there and we experiment with things, we learn things.
8:17
You know, some stuff is not as good as other things or
8:20
whatever. But The thing is, is that when
8:23
we get to that place, it's it's that extreme thinking.
8:26
Oh well, that one just wasn't good.
8:27
We're not going to do any more, you know, where we don't have
8:30
this many follow whatever it is, people start to go to that
8:33
almost fatalistic face of, well, it's just not working.
8:36
I'm just not going to do it, lol, you know?
8:39
And I say no, We just keep practicing that.
8:40
We practice it, we practice it and we practice it until you get
8:44
really good at it. But even when we get really good
8:46
at it, we're still going to happen flow, you know?
8:49
That's life, Yeah. And I think that's what people
8:51
have to realize. Because yeah, you're just,
8:53
you're going to have off days and it's OK that those happened.
8:59
And you just like you said, identify, you know and realize
9:04
that the longer you hang on to it, the more you stay stuck.
9:09
Well, and I think the other thing, and we've talked about
9:11
this, is that sometimes I think when we're doing stuff, we
9:15
forget the why exactly. We forget why am I doing this?
9:20
What? What is it providing for me?
9:23
What is my end goal and why is that goal important?
9:28
That's when it's really important to look at the the end
9:30
goal piece of it. There's all these things, that
9:33
little things that have to happen and that's where the
9:35
proactive part comes in to reach that and goal.
9:39
But focusing on that why is important too, remembering why
9:44
you're doing the little steps that you're doing.
9:46
And in fact one of the other podcasts that we like to listen
9:51
to, Yo Quedo Di Nedo, she had one on side Hustles, and she
9:55
talked about that the remembering your why, Why are
9:59
you doing this? Also, you're a badass by.
10:04
Jensen said. I thought.
10:05
Same thing. Why?
10:08
Why? Oh, I want to have money.
10:11
Why? What are you using it for?
10:14
I tell people, you know, people say, well, I want to have a
10:16
savings. What are you saving for?
10:18
Because pretty soon the savings becomes almost a chore and
10:23
there's no gratification for it. Right.
10:26
I think you have to be really clear with what your intention
10:30
is and why you want it. Otherwise it's not important to
10:33
you. It's, you know, you lose focus.
10:36
And I think that's what happens is sometimes people get so
10:38
caught up in the process of it that they forget why they're
10:43
doing the process. So then it's like that.
10:47
And I think that might be where that becomes more cumbersome.
10:50
It's like, Oh my God, I got to go do this, but why?
10:53
And but if you remember the why, then there's joy in doing it.
10:56
Do you know what I mean? Exactly.
10:59
And I think that I feel like I that I feel like that's
11:02
something that we've had with the podcast.
11:05
I feel like the why has been there.
11:07
I feel like we do this because there's a lot of knowledge base
11:13
and there's a lot, there's lots of stories to be told.
11:17
And sometimes, you know, one of those stories we have on here or
11:21
our story may resonate with somebody and they may say, Oh my
11:24
gosh, yes, that works for me. And that light goes on.
11:28
And they're then able to continue on that journey.
11:31
It's all about the journey of all these people you know and
11:35
and and our journey and how once again, we didn't.
11:38
Nobody's born a podcaster. This is something we're really
11:40
working on to to figure out how do you do these things better?
11:43
But it doesn't matter. It's not just this.
11:45
It's everything we do. I want this relationship, but
11:49
why? What does it bring to you?
11:50
What do you bring to the relationship?
11:52
All of those things we stop looking at what's the value of
11:56
what we're doing. And I think that causes us to
12:01
have that ebb and flow and then we go from that.
12:04
I'm on top of the world to why am I doing this.
12:07
We forget and I think you know that's something we've gotten
12:13
better at is we have those conversations, we remind
12:16
ourselves the wise of it. But The thing is it's really
12:19
cool is in doing that and having those conversations we find more
12:23
wise what is this going to provide?
12:26
What is this going to do for us? How is this going to enhance
12:30
our? Lives and and what does it do
12:32
for someone else because that's a huge thing for us.
12:35
I feel like is you know it is a way of paying it forward because
12:40
it hopefully you know the information is valuable and
12:44
reaches more ears. You know, we can become focused
12:47
on the amount of followers that we have or that kind of thing.
12:50
But what I really hope is that the stories that we tell
12:54
resonate with people and that it shows them that, you know, even
13:00
the the things that some of these people have faced, the
13:03
adversities that they have faced, what kind of things they
13:06
did and and how they overcame it and that and and talking to them
13:10
about that. I'm really hoping that others
13:13
will see the value in that and that it will somehow help them
13:16
inspire them to keep going. And I think, you know, it was
13:20
really interesting because sometimes it's, it's what we
13:22
say. But you know, we had Linda on a
13:26
couple of weeks ago. And when just seeing that person
13:30
and seeing how they had transformed themselves was like,
13:33
Oh my God, I can, I want to do this.
13:37
So it was that woman's journey that helped her on her journey.
13:41
And do you see what I mean? It's it's that thing of making
13:44
those connections and and and using the stuff that we see to
13:48
motivate us. Yeah, and if you haven't heard
13:51
that episode with Linda Baird, it's She's a personal fitness
13:55
coach through Beachbody. Check.
13:58
It out, yeah. And just overcoming the
14:00
adversity and what that was like for her and and and why we do
14:03
the things we do. Once again, you had, she had to
14:05
know the why. Why do I not want to be in this
14:07
place any longer? Yeah.
14:09
Why She started her journey to begin with the fitness.
14:12
Yeah, and I think that's what's really the important thing of
14:16
it. And I'm so grateful we've had so
14:18
many guests on who I feel like really have these amazing,
14:22
amazing stories to tell and just hopefully resonates.
14:26
You know, we're super excited. You know, we had Raquel
14:30
Pennington on. Raquel, Rocky Pennington.
14:32
She's getting ready to fight for the bantamweight title in UFC.
14:37
So super excited about that. But that journey for her, even
14:41
through the adversity of breaking her back, having a leg
14:45
injury, all of these things. But she keeps the focus of the
14:48
why? Yeah, I want to be a champion.
14:51
Exactly. You know, she's a role model,
14:54
those kind of things. You can also check out that
14:58
podcast as well, and it's on YouTube.
15:01
But those are the things, any of those stories that resonate, you
15:06
know? Yeah.
15:07
And check out the video, cast kids.
15:09
You got to see that cutie. Oh my goodness, their baby.
15:13
Their baby is so adorable. Just.
15:15
Adorable and happy. She is one of the happiest
15:18
babies I've ever seen, ma'am. Yes, so Adventures of Two Girls
15:21
in a Pod on YouTube. Check it out.
15:23
Yeah, so those are the themes, though, you know, we didn't Once
15:27
again, modifying change what you have to change.
15:30
But sometimes I think people get very stuck too.
15:33
And they say, OK, this is what I'm going to do, this is my
15:36
goal. And these are the steps.
15:38
And then they take the steps and it's not quite working the way
15:43
they want. So sometimes you have to change
15:46
the steps. You don't necessarily change the
15:49
goal, but you may change how you get to the goal.
15:53
Right. But once again, and we talk
15:55
about that too, that thing of extreme thinking of if it didn't
15:59
work, then I'm just going to do it, you know, then, oh, now I
16:02
got to try something totally different.
16:04
No, that's how much do we invest in it?
16:08
Why is it important to us? You know and you know often
16:12
times you know when we're therapy is a huge place that we
16:14
see this. I want maybe you should try this
16:17
this week. I tried it didn't work.
16:21
So we're just going to not do it again or I tried.
16:24
It only worked once. It is consistency, and we talk
16:28
so much about the importance of consistency.
16:32
Yeah. Why is it important to be
16:33
consistent and to practice? Because you're going to have
16:37
those days where you ebb and flow exactly.
16:41
And the good thing is, is when you practice and you kind of
16:43
build up, then when you have that place of ebb and flow and
16:46
you kind of go to that other patient, you still there's that
16:48
part of us I think that still realizes but you know what
16:51
things are still going well. This.
16:53
Maybe it's just about me, I don't know.
16:55
But I think it's interesting that we do that.
16:58
We play those head games with ourselves for so many different
17:00
reasons. Well.
17:01
And I think one of the things that really helps with the flow
17:05
part of it is those that you network with the people that you
17:09
know support you and or even the people that are on the same kind
17:14
of journey, you know, they have knowledge about how to do things
17:19
you know. And if you can surround yourself
17:21
with the people that are going to help motivate you and help
17:25
show you how to, you know, do something that's that is in line
17:30
with your goals, that is really going to help you, we.
17:34
Are so amazingly fortunate because we have people in our
17:38
life that are like that. Our friend Sandra, Oh my
17:43
goodness, she is so on top of everything that we're doing.
17:47
She's so invested in that and so appreciative of it.
17:52
You know and. She's kind of quiet.
17:53
So when we asked her to do a podcast on books and reading
17:56
books and stuff like that, it was like boom, but she did it,
18:00
you know, and we totally appreciate because that's her
18:03
journey her her books, you know, But everybody has those.
18:08
But you're right. The networking and we not just
18:11
center we have an amazing you know there's Tammy, there's all
18:13
of our friends you know Kathy, Kathy, Sylvia, Heather, Michael.
18:18
I mean just we just have this amazing group of friends and our
18:22
families also who really help support that and that's what's
18:28
important is those people that resonate and and and that
18:34
support for you and then stepping outside your box to get
18:37
those other people, you know. And that work.
18:41
Beyond. That exactly.
18:43
When you reach out to other people, they know people and
18:45
sometimes you know you need that kind of information.
18:50
It doesn't. You know you.
18:51
You don't know who they know and it and making those connections.
18:55
Sometimes you you know, you make those meaningful connections and
18:59
it it helps you and your goals exactly.
19:02
And I think The thing is is I think sometimes maybe where
19:06
things get weird or complicated is when ego gets involved.
19:11
If you don't want this person's help because they might be
19:13
better than you or you don't want to do this because of the
19:16
no, you know, which I thought was really great because our
19:19
friend Renee, also very supportive, you know, when she
19:22
called and said, you know, I want to do a podcast around my
19:25
blindness, Oh my God, yes. Let's help you get this set up.
19:30
And that's what we get. We're not in competition.
19:33
Right. We wanted her, you know, to be
19:35
successful, to be successful. So we shared, you know, any
19:39
information that we could with her about how to get started.
19:42
And was very fortunate. We had her on visions of a blind
19:46
woman and then she had us on her podcast and that's that's that
19:50
thing that is what helps us to remember the why.
19:55
And so I think that those relationships that help us to
19:59
get there. So when we're looking at those
20:02
goals, it's there's so many things that go into being
20:06
successful on any level, on any level.
20:11
And often times people sit there.
20:12
Well, I'm a self-made. No, there is always
20:16
contributions along the way from the time we are little.
20:20
Whether it's a teacher, your parents, your grandparents, then
20:24
the neighbor, you know, the storeroom, it doesn't matter.
20:27
You know our. Relationships play a role, for
20:29
sure. Absolutely.
20:31
And realizing that helps us, I feel get to those goals even
20:37
faster and I think sometimes even in that Evan full because
20:39
sometimes when we get stuck, sometimes it's helpful to go
20:43
talk to somebody. Do you?
20:46
Know what I mean? Use those resources.
20:48
We tend to do it with each other.
20:50
But man, it sucks if you're both down at the same time.
20:55
Yeah, let's just get some ice cream and watch some sad movies
20:58
or something. I don't really want don't do
21:00
that, but but people tend to do that.
21:03
What they do is they feed that negative energy, yeah.
21:06
And you don't want to go, you know, hang out with the Debbie
21:09
Downers that are going to that are going to just drag you down
21:13
further. That's not going to help you
21:15
out. You need that kind of uplifting,
21:17
you know, relationships in your life that can can help the
21:21
fortunes, yes. So go to relationships that you
21:24
know that when you're down there they're like, yeah, OK, give you
21:28
a little bit of a kick in the butt and then you're they're
21:30
like, oh OK well that wasn't what I expected.
21:33
But yeah I'm on you know I'm on my path.
21:35
Once again, it absolutely I agree.
21:37
I think that really utilizing our support systems, utilizing
21:45
people with knowledge exactly, you know, go to those people
21:48
with the knowledge, learn from them and.
21:49
Those people that are going to mentor you in that way, you
21:52
know, absolutely they're going to tell you when you've had a
21:54
set back. You know what?
21:55
What did you learn from it? This is what you do going
21:58
forward. You you look at that and realize
22:01
what you can take away from it. Absolutely.
22:05
And I think that that's kind of the cool thing.
22:06
And I mean, we are getting more into listening to a lot of
22:10
different podcasts that are doing some different stuff.
22:12
But we read a lot that we read books that also are about
22:15
helping us to learn to navigate things, and that's the whole
22:18
thing. There are so many resources out
22:20
there, so many resources. But I do think sometimes when we
22:24
go into that slump, it's hard to remember there are the
22:26
resources. Yeah.
22:28
So I would say just be kind to yourself, show yourself a little
22:31
bit of grace, you know? Hopefully you're a person that
22:34
likes to read. I know that works for me.
22:36
Like when I'm having a moment and I just feel like I'm not,
22:40
you know, on point. I really feel like that
22:43
sometimes if I'll go and read something especially that has to
22:48
do with gratitude, because I really feel like that gratitude
22:51
is a way of pulling yourself back into that positive mindset.
22:57
There's research on it. There's a whole bunch of stuff
23:00
that, you know, gratitude is not magical thinking.
23:03
You know, when we talk about gratitude, it reminds us of what
23:08
we already have. And if we have this, we can have
23:11
more. When you're reminded of what is
23:15
working, you are able to, I feel like, better look at a situation
23:21
and have critical thinking and come up with solutions and all
23:26
of that because you're in that positive mindset, because you're
23:30
grateful for the things that are working.
23:32
Exactly. And I don't think that people
23:34
realize just how vitally important it is to to our lives
23:41
because once again, that's a thing.
23:42
When you get into that slump, once again, the negative starts
23:47
coming in. I didn't do this right.
23:48
I should have done this. I should meet this deadline,
23:51
whatever it is, instead of, Oh my gosh, I got AI, got this
23:56
accomplished. I'm so grateful for everything
23:58
I've done. Because time, you know, when we
24:01
look at time management and stuff like that, it's another
24:05
thing that, you know, we we look at that.
24:07
How does that time management work against us?
24:10
And I'm telling people, procrastinators had this
24:14
conversation this week with clients about procrastination,
24:17
and procrastination is our way of convincing ourselves not to
24:22
do something. Yeah, and I think you really do
24:28
Then also have to go back to your Why?
24:30
Why are you doing this in the 1st place?
24:33
You know, I mean, if this is something you're doing
24:36
begrudgingly, are you on the right path?
24:38
Maybe you should look at that. And I think sometimes the reason
24:41
people procrastinating, they don't even realize, is because
24:43
they're having too many thoughts.
24:45
Yeah, that's too. Many it can even be.
24:48
It could be too many ideas. So then there it's like, I don't
24:51
know where to start. Where do I start?
24:54
Oh my God, there's so much. Yes, we have in fact, but yet.
24:59
But it can feel chaotic and it can feel like, oh, I can't start
25:02
because I don't really have all my thoughts and order, or I
25:07
don't have all this, or I don't have all that.
25:10
But procrastination is not proactive.
25:13
No. And when you when you find
25:17
yourself in that place, I think then you are sometimes acting
25:20
out of a space of desperation. You're being reactive to things,
25:25
and it's not. It's not helpful.
25:28
Absolutely. And you know, we talk, you know,
25:30
there's this reactive thing that we do.
25:33
And and then I think that when we do that, you know, the person
25:36
will say, well, you know, it didn't turn out too bad, but
25:38
imagine what it would have turned out if you hadn't
25:40
procrastinated. Do you know what I mean?
25:43
We use those justifying statements and I just think it's
25:46
interesting when we do that and we, you know, it's like
25:50
procrastination and I mean I think that all of us at some
25:52
point probably have procrastinated, you know what I
25:55
mean? For sure.
25:57
You know, I got me on that paper and I procrastinated.
26:01
You know, you got lucky notes, but you know it it things
26:05
formulate or whatever. But I think, you know,
26:07
procrastination is one of those things once again that we get
26:10
into that reactive place and then we do things out of
26:12
desperation. We make decisions out of
26:15
desperation. You know, it's like, oh, my
26:18
goodness, I'm supposed to have this or that.
26:19
And then it's like you're scrambling to try to figure out
26:22
how to either extend that time out or how to cram a lot of
26:26
stuff into a short period of time and.
26:28
Then when you're rushed, sometimes you don't always make
26:31
the best decisions. And that's why I tell it's it's
26:34
just write it down and and when she said her phone, I'm sure I
26:38
don't. She's probably going to use all
26:39
of her memory just on all of the notes that she takes for for our
26:42
podcast and our business. Yeah, but it's important because
26:47
then when you don't have that, we don't have the recall we used
26:51
to and the it's not because people's memories are getting
26:53
worse, it's because we're in. We're ingesting more
26:57
information. We're inundated with the Nordeus
27:01
information that we have coming at us all the time.
27:04
And the things that we have to remember and the things that
27:06
we're doing, it's yeah, it can be overwhelming.
27:09
And then, yeah, you forget oh. My goodness.
27:12
When I used to work at the, I was a I didn't know how this
27:15
schools and I would leave my office and I was on a mission.
27:19
They had to go to the other school, the other elementary,
27:22
whatever. But I had to go through these
27:24
hallways and I would have, whether it was students or
27:27
teachers or you know talking to me telling you they need.
27:30
And I remember I would in my head I was like hey, where am I
27:32
going? Where am I going?
27:33
And let the all of this. And then I would get there and
27:36
I'd think, I know they said stuff.
27:38
What was it they said and wasn't important because my thing was
27:42
to be it's hard to be present to all of the noise.
27:47
OK. And not that what they're saying
27:50
is not relevant and valuable, but I think that's what's
27:54
happening. We are we are just having this
27:57
influx of information and of things like that.
28:02
That's one of the reasons I love being a therapist, because when
28:04
I'm in my office, the only thing that exists is the person in
28:08
front of me. Everything else is quiet.
28:12
It's so important for me to be so present.
28:17
And so for me, everything in my head slows down, which I think
28:23
is a nice thing. It's it's very comforting.
28:26
But I think that's what it is. And that's the other thing we
28:28
talked about, and this is so important, is to be present.
28:32
Because once again, when we're having all those ideas coming
28:35
in, we're not present because we can't be present with all of
28:38
them. That's why when you write them
28:40
down, then you can be present. OK, this idea be present with
28:43
it, yeah. How is it going to?
28:45
Play out. It helps you to go back and
28:47
explore it later. Maybe it's just a word, maybe
28:50
it's just something you hear that that makes you, you know,
28:54
think of something. If you just write down, you
28:57
know, a couple keywords or whatever, and then you can go
28:59
back and revisit that and and expand on the ideas around it,
29:04
you know it helps you so much. We're learning to use our Google
29:09
Calendar. Chris is old school in some ways
29:14
because she still has her appointment book.
29:18
Her she hand writes everything. I like to write you.
29:24
Know if if it's what you like. Come on now, do it.
29:26
But I'll tell. My phone too.
29:29
Yes, but we're learning to use that more because sometimes
29:32
they're like what do we have to do?
29:34
I don't know if it's not. I said put in our calendar and
29:38
but now I have to remember to look at the guest.
29:40
No. Yeah, see, it's not just me not
29:42
putting it in. You're not looking at it.
29:46
Well, it was funny because when our friend Sandra King, we want
29:50
we made reservations to eat at the rabbit hole and y'all, if
29:53
you have not eaten at the rabbit hole, you have to rabbit.
29:56
Hole downtown Colorado Springs, OH.
29:59
My goodness, I'm telling you, the food and drink is amazing,
30:02
but their Moon Pie is delicious. So that's what we were really
30:06
going for, was the Moon Pie. I'll figure.
30:08
Might as well have dinner too. But no, the rabbit hole.
30:11
Fantastic. We make the reservation and then
30:15
Christy. Christy puts it on the calendar,
30:18
but we were doing other things. She puts the wrong time.
30:22
I don't think I put the original wrong time, but then we changed
30:25
the reservation and then so I had like three times down and I
30:29
was like, I don't know when it so we.
30:30
Tell we tell Sandra about, Oh yeah, we're going.
30:32
We have a reservation at 6:30, she goes, Really.
30:34
I thought it was fine. And they were there like, Oh my
30:37
God, when is it? It was fine.
30:39
But even things like that would because and I'll tell and I'll
30:42
even tell you sometimes if you're don't talk to me when I'm
30:46
in the middle of something because then I really don't
30:48
hear. And I thought that was a rule.
30:52
How do I know when you're not listening?
30:58
Usually when I'm doing something else.
31:01
You know, we can't tend to everything at once, I guess.
31:03
But no, even things like that is, you know, if if it's an
31:07
important idea or something, you'll say, oh, this is
31:10
important or I'll say this is a really good idea.
31:12
And then that's the other thing is slowing it down so that you
31:16
can actually take time to explore things you know, or be
31:21
attentive to and actively listening to those ideas, which
31:25
are probably really brilliant, but they're not brilliant if I
31:28
don't hear them, you know what I mean?
31:30
It's interesting because people can put it in perspective with
31:34
the body. The body needs rest every night
31:36
in order to recover to Workforce the next day.
31:40
And the mind really needs that too.
31:42
It needs that downtime. And we've talked in the past
31:46
about, you know, meditation and those kind of things and just,
31:51
yes, quieting the mind. And when you do that, it really
31:55
does Createspace, so that you can have ideas and creativity
32:01
and it can all just flow. Well, and I think when you do
32:05
that too, you don't feel tired, right?
32:11
You know, if you're doing something that you love and
32:14
you're starting to get tired, then it's because there's not
32:19
enough space and things like that.
32:22
Same thing. You know, when you're doing, you
32:24
know, first of the year everybody's doing their workout
32:26
programs. Now, you know, it's my client
32:28
said I can't go to the gym now there's 900 new people there who
32:31
are going to go for one week. Got a membership for a?
32:35
Week. Yeah, wait till next week.
32:37
Yeah. Got to wait about two weeks and
32:39
then I go back and it's going to be clear again.
32:42
But that's the thing we even when we do these things,
32:45
whether, you know, people make New Year's resolutions or
32:48
whatever they do, The thing is, is that there's no plan.
32:52
Yeah, there's no reason why. Oh, I want to be thin.
32:57
Why? Oh, because my friends thin or
33:01
whatever it is. Because I want to breathe really
33:03
heavily when I'm bending over trying to tie my shoe.
33:06
That would be a good why I want to do just one time, you know?
33:12
No, I think those are the things that we're talking about is how
33:15
do we do those things in a way that we're not setting ourselves
33:20
up to not be successful? How do we mentally prepare for
33:26
all of these things? Because it's not.
33:30
I always tell people, you know, you can sit down and do a
33:32
business planning to do all that, but there's there's the
33:35
huge mental piece to it. It's like preparing every year
33:40
to do your taxes. It sits there and it sits there
33:44
and you're like it's coming and I've got to get it.
33:48
Done. Let's not talk about
33:49
procrastination on that, shall we?
33:53
Yeah. But this year, we're this year,
33:58
I'm not going to do that, OK. Yeah, Here we are next year,
34:02
10/15/20 years later. And you know what it is.
34:06
I think when it's something that we don't like how we could
34:12
switch that to gratitude, we will stay stuck in that
34:15
negativity and that planning and all of that.
34:18
And if we're doing a task or we're doing something that it's
34:21
not the most fun part of the business or you know, some
34:24
people might really like, I'd like.
34:25
I really love being a therapist. I don't like all the other BS
34:29
that comes with it. I don't like the insurance piece
34:31
of it. I don't like doing any of.
34:33
I love that interaction. I love that piece of it.
34:39
That's what I will focus on. And then when I have to write
34:42
reports or do stuff like this or, you know, these people are
34:47
wanting stuff or these people are wanting stuff, that's not
34:49
the fun part for me. But then if I sit there and I
34:52
have that gratitude, but if I write this letter for Social
34:56
Security or for this that's going to help somebody out, It
34:59
switches that thought processes with.
35:02
Me, and I think that's a huge piece of it.
35:05
And for me, especially with the tax piece, the proactive part,
35:08
you know, if you're got everything organized the way you
35:12
need it up to that point, you know, I hear it's not hard to
35:16
do, but I have to work on that. So we.
35:20
Will keep you posted. Yeah.
35:23
But I think those are the things ebb and flow happens.
35:27
We've talked about several places.
35:29
EBB and flow happens. Right.
35:32
And The thing is, is it is life. It is all the stuff.
35:39
Once again, we where we had, we're inundated with so much
35:42
stuff. And I feel like if people could
35:45
just take a moment and pause and also realize that if something
35:51
isn't working, don't, don't get rid of the whole thing.
35:55
You know, it's kind of like if you have a flat tire or
35:57
something, you don't go get rid of the car, you know what I
36:01
mean? It's not.
36:02
All or nothing. I see that a lot people are into
36:05
this, all or nothing. Well, it didn't work for me or I
36:08
always tell my clients and like my baby steps and that's what it
36:14
is. Each step, no matter how big or
36:16
small, is still moving in the direction that you want.
36:21
I think if we start to learn to shift that focus to those little
36:26
movements that are, that are moving us forward, that's all
36:30
that matters. Becoming focused on what is
36:32
working will help you find solution exactly.
36:36
And it's and and when you have that ebb and flow and and as we
36:40
all do you know and and that day you brought it up because you
36:43
were kind of you know. In a dip.
36:47
A little dip, but it didn't last long.
36:50
And I even told you, you know, you, you know, it would last
36:52
longer a long time ago now every time it gets shorter and shorter
36:56
and then, but then we started talking about the whys.
36:58
We started talking about, you know, really solidifying plans
37:02
and doing things like that. Well, I think a lot of times two
37:05
people don't realize that and it's interesting that we don't
37:09
because what we fuel our body with sometimes that impacts our
37:13
mood. And you know, maybe it's not,
37:16
you know, you wake up that morning and nothing has gone on
37:19
to to set you in a bad mood or anything like that.
37:23
But what did you have to eat the day before?
37:25
I don't. I I think that that does play a
37:28
role in mood a lot of times. 100% and I don't think that we,
37:33
we don't view food as fuel, you know and if I'm having a bad day
37:39
and what I eat is ice cream, that's not necessarily fuel for
37:45
my body. It might be fuel for my mood.
37:48
But however, it'll bring you up and we'll bring you down, yeah.
37:52
You're going to have a crash after that anyway, from the
37:54
show. Sometimes so sometimes when we
37:56
wake up, we wake up feeling tired.
37:59
Sometimes if we don't get a good night's sleep, sometimes if we
38:02
drink too much in our at the night, we already wake up and
38:06
but instead of trying to identify what's going on, we'll
38:09
be in that mood and that will be the and then we focus on the
38:12
mood. Yeah, and trying to, you know,
38:15
figure out all the things that you feel like a wrong in your
38:19
life. I don't know.
38:20
But I think that must have. Been something that happened to
38:22
me when I was five, no. Something triggered me.
38:27
But I think that's what it is. It's it's realizing that that's
38:30
that ebb and flow. Sometimes it might be there's
38:33
all of these things. And once again, showing yourself
38:37
a little bit of grace and saying it's OK if I'm having this
38:40
moment, but let it be a moment, and then how do I move past that
38:45
moment? And realizing that you know
38:47
this, this too shall pass. This mood is not going to stay
38:50
here. And then like I said, I mean
38:53
you, you don't know. It could be, it could be
38:55
something with your diet that you're not getting enough, you
38:58
know of or whatever. And it it makes a difference.
39:02
There are. So many things, variables that
39:04
we can't account for, and when we sit and we try to do that
39:08
then we stay stuck because now you know, I'm starting where and
39:13
I'm looking at what you go down the rabbit hole.
39:18
Exactly and. Then that keeps you there.
39:21
So I guess overall understanding we're going to ebb and slow and
39:24
it's OK. There's nothing wrong with it.
39:28
Showing ourselves a little bit of grace when we do do it,
39:31
realizing that we have to go back and remember why do I do
39:35
what I'm doing? What is the value of it?
39:39
Yeah, you know, and when? You're having those moments.
39:42
Just recognize it and then realize that you can let it go.
39:47
Oh, I think the other really key things here too is that when
39:51
we're looking at the why? Because some people say, well, I
39:53
want to have lots of money and so and you ask, why do you want
39:57
to have lots of money? Well, because people who have
40:01
lots of money are happy. Sometimes you really have to
40:04
evaluate that. But it might be.
40:06
You know and. I love how she when she talks
40:10
about in your quiero dinero, when she talks about why she
40:14
doesn't, why she didn't want, why she wanted to change.
40:17
It wasn't about money, it was about flexibility.
40:20
And a lot of times we get confused by that.
40:22
People think they want money, but not what they really want is
40:24
they want that money provides them the luxury of flexibility
40:29
of whatever that is. So you have to be able to break
40:34
that down even more. I want money because money makes
40:38
people happy, while no money doesn't make people happy.
40:41
What it does is it affords you to do the things that bring joy
40:44
to your life. It's a tool, exactly.
40:47
So being more clear is really important.
40:52
Being more clear is really important.
40:54
I want it to be in private practice because I wanted to set
40:57
my hours. I know that's, you know, if I
41:01
don't want to work this day, I don't work this day.
41:03
You know, we now work to, you know, now I work three days a
41:06
week. I'm happy with that because that
41:09
affords me time to do the other stuff that I like, which is the
41:12
podcasting and other things. And we have a whole bunch of
41:15
other things that are sitting there waiting to come into
41:21
fruition. But you know, once again, the
41:27
ebb and flow, we're going to have it.
41:29
It's normal. It's natural.
41:31
We don't have and, but once again, how do we remind
41:36
ourselves baby steps? How do we look at the frequency,
41:38
the duration and the intensity of things?
41:41
Is it getting better? Shorter time periods, All of
41:44
those things? Then we know we have forward
41:46
motion. Procrastination is really not
41:48
our friend, no matter how much we try to convince ourselves
41:51
that it is. It's just excuses.
41:55
Because I don't want to do what I need to do or whatever, or I'd
41:58
rather be doing something else, you know?
42:00
We just caught, you know, being real about it and and
42:03
acknowledging that that I think, is literally.
42:05
Important. Yeah.
42:06
Acknowledging that, letting it go and refocusing to the why.
42:10
And slowing down, Yeah, slow down all the chatter, write
42:13
stuff down, be able to go back and look at it.
42:16
All of those things that are important to being successful.
42:21
But you have to look at success is not just what's on the on
42:26
paper, it is in our mind and what it brings to us it is, it
42:31
is so much more than that and we have to be able to address and
42:34
identify those things that are getting in our way I think.
42:39
Especially when it's ourself, yes, which is often.
42:42
What it is, and yes, it really is our we're our worst enemies
42:46
half the time, people we really are.
42:47
So, you know, just, you know, maybe some food for thought for
42:51
the new year if you're on a venture and stuff like that.
42:54
And whether it's a business way, friendships or whatever it is,
42:59
you know, but it's all. Ongoing practice.
43:01
So we're going to add some. We're going to be low and it's
43:04
going to be all good. It's all good in the end and you
43:07
know, as always, we are so grateful for everybody who tunes
43:10
in. Yes, thank you so much.
43:13
And you can find us on 2 Girls at a pod.com.
43:16
We are also on any listening platform that you get your
43:20
podcast from. Please listen, subscribe, share.
43:24
That just helps us out. We appreciate it.
43:26
And we are also on YouTube Adventures of 2 Girls.
43:31
In a pod life's journey. You can check us out there too.
43:36
We really greatly appreciated and you know, like I said, go.
43:40
Check out our videos on there. Sharon's got a mixology video if
43:45
you're at that and. I'm going to do more because I'm
43:47
going to make my the Margarita the way I like it, not that that
43:51
field don't make it good, but anyway, yeah, check it out.
43:54
We appreciate it and thank you so much and we will be back in
43:59
next week. Bye, bye.