Shows / The Franchisees
The Franchisees
Two film-loving friends devour entire franchises, tracing their theatrical rise, direct-to-video-fall, and occasional redemption. Banter, bits, and bad impressions follow.
Episodes
- The Franchisees
The Christ Quadrilogy Part IV: Antichrist (2009)
Chaos reigns†††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††♱††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††♱†††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††…
- The Franchisees
The Christ Quadrilogy Part III: The Passion of the Christ (2004) (with Jordan Seccareccia and Katherine Vienneau)
[loud beating and flogging noises]ahhh! ohhh ouch ohhh nooo! ow! owww! We’re back ahhh stop oh god ow! With a new episode on a film from the twisted mind of…
- The Franchisees
The Christ Quadrilogy Part II: The Last Temptation of Christ (1988) (with Jordan Seccareccia and Lucas)
He has risen again! He being Jesus Christ of course, our lord and saviour and friend of the pod. Alex and Ben are back with Part II of the epic Christ…
- The Franchisees
The Christ Quadrilogy Part I: Jesus Christ Superstar (1973) (with Devin Shears)
I loooove you Jeeeesus Chriiiiist. Jesus Christ I loooove you, yesss I dooooo.Happy April everybody! We here at The Franchisees are good, honest, god-fearing…
- The Franchisees
Ted 2 (2015)
Ted has risen! Ted 2 unto others as you would have Ted 2 to uh yourself.We're back with the sequel to Seth MacFarlane's lovable children's film TED, the…
- The Franchisees
Ted (2012)
We're back this week with a new franchise, TED. Everyone's favourite Seth MacFarlane project behind Family Guy but ahead of everything else he's done. Since…
- The Franchisees
Dune: Part Two (2024) (with Alex Baigent)
The spice continues to flow on our latest episode: DUNE: PART TWO, the epic conclusion to Denis Villeneuve's adaptation of one book. We have a very special…
- The Franchisees
Dune (2021) [aka Dune: Part One] (with Aren Bergstrom)
It's DUNE time again, the spice must flow, the podcast must uhhh ummmm be recorded and released.What a wonderful, special episode we have for you. Joining us…
- The Franchisees
Dune (1984)
Beer is the mind killer, the sleeper has awakened from a drunken nap. And many more Dune-related jokes I’m sure! We’re back with an exciting and relevant…
- The Franchisees
BONUS Official Martin Scorsese Filmography Ranking BONUS
Listen up you rat fucks, Ben has now seen all 26 of cinema god Martin Scorsese's fiction feature films. He and Alex have cooked you up a nice-a bonus episode…
- The Franchisees
The Color of Money (1986)
Martin Scorsese baby. The god! We're back with his 1986 cool guy classic, THE COLOR OF MONEY. Paul Newman is back as Fast Eddie Felcher, older and wiser (?)…
- The Franchisees
The Hustler (1961)
We're back and squeezing in a short "franchise" before DUNE unto others as we'd have DUNE unto ourselves. We chose something good for a bit of a change of…
- The Franchisees
Jurassic World Dominion (2022) (with Rob McLay)
Jurassic World Dominion NO COLONYou don't have to watch this movie! You could go outside! You don't have to have seen this movie to enjoy this podcast, we…
- The Franchisees
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018) (with Rob McLay)
We're back to discuss the 2nd film in the JURASSIC WORLD series, JURASSIC WORLD: FALLEN KINGDOM. It's a real doozy so thank god we're joined by our special…
- The Franchisees
BONUS: The Best Movies of 2023
oh this is a big special extra long and rambling episode for you real Fanchisees out there, we love you and if you listen to this whole episode you will be…
- The Franchisees
Jurassic World (2015)
It's Jurassic's World, we're just living in it. That doesn't really make sense I guess. But maybe there was a time when rebooting the Jurassic franchise didn't…
- The Franchisees
Jurassic Park III (2001)
Ben eats a bagel, the boys respond to legitimate fan mail, and discuss the stirring final chapter of the Jurassic Park trilogy.
- The Franchisees
The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)
Something Survived... that's right, The Franchisees are back with the dino-tastic sequel to Jurassic Park. There's little debate around whether this second…
- The Franchisees
Jurassic Park (1993) [aka Billy and the Cloneasaurus]
We're back! New year, new us. Looking to the future, and the future's gonna be bright. That's why we chose to go back 65 million years to bring you some…
- The Franchisees
Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)
Last episode of the year! Happy New Year! Hypergremlinization! See you on the other side!
- The Franchisees
Gremlins (1984)
'Twas the night before Christmas if you listen to this immediately or maybe next year on December 24th it could become a tradition for you why not? We're…
- The Franchisees
Wonka (2023)/Jordan's Top Ten (with Jordan Seccareccia)
I’m making chocolate of course!We’re back to check in with the latest screen version of the beloved character Willy Wonka. What’s he been up to? What was he…
- The Franchisees
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005)
What a fucking drag!This week we revisited a real piece of crap, Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Does Burton's pure imagination combined with a…
- The Franchisees
Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971)
"Help! Help! Somebody help me! If you can read this, send help! I'm a fat little German boy and I'm stuck in the chocolate pipe! Please for the love of god…
- The Franchisees
The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes (2023) (with Mary Jane)
Hello listeners, we've got a ballad to sing to you, I hope you don't find that cringe! Special guest Mary Jane joins us again to talk about the latest…
- The Franchisees
The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Parts 1 & 2 (2014-2015) (with Mary Jane)
Another double feature for all you weirdo arrested development YA freaks! That's right, The Franchisees are back with HG: MJ 1+2 with very special guest and…
- The Franchisees
The Hunger Games (2012)/The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013) (feat. Will Gertler)
New franchise alert! Two movies in one episode? Can it be done? Turns out, yes it can, quite easily. After some unforeseen issues and delays we've decided to…
- The Franchisees
BONUS: The Franchisees Halloween Special (with Ben Bourgon)
A Halloween Special in November? That's right. And if you don't like it, your beloved Simpsons used to do it all the time so stop complaining! For the past few…
- The Franchisees
Saw XXX (2023) [with Jordan Seccareccia and Anisa Moquit]
*****Thank you for listening and we're sorry there was no episode last week. We'll make it up to you with this long episode and some more bonus eps coming up…
- The Franchisees
Spiral: From the Book of Saw (2021)/Everybody Hates Chris (with Joel Edmiston)
Ben got cropped. Chris Rock got slapped. These things happen and who can really say who was in the wrong and who was in the right? All we can do is analyze…
- The Franchisees
Jigsaw (2017)
The Final Chapter my ass. The Saw Series continues after a long hiatus with the 2017 sequel/prequel/spinoff Jigsaw directed by the Spierig Brothers. Jigsaw is…
- The Franchisees
Saw 3D (2010) [aka Saw: The Final Chapter aka Saw Se7en]
A silly episode for a silly movie. Good silly! We had a lot of fun with this Extremely Goofy Movie that attempts to wrap up the series with a slightly more…
- The Franchisees
Saw 6ix (2009) (with Katherine Vienneau and Devin Shears) (feat. Jigsaw Jesse)
We're back with an action-packed, double/triple guested, too long episode! Thank you for joining us for the sixth part in the epic ten-part anime series, Saw…
- The Franchisees
Saw V (2008) (with Devin Shears)
Congratulations! You've made it halfway through our series on the epic ten-part anime franchise SAW. Good for you, well done.Friend of the pod Devin Shears…
- The Franchisees
Saw IV (2007)/The COVID TIFF Drew Barrymore Scab Aggro Dr1ft Dick Rating No Loads Refused Special
We're back with another entry in our series on the epic 10-part anime SAW series. This one's a doozy, we've got so much to discuss. We don't even get to…
- The Franchisees
Saw III (2006) (with Katherine Vienneau)
We're back, Darren Lynn Bousman is back, and our special guest Katherine Vienneau is back! Where does the epic 10-part anime Saw series go after the boring and…
- The Franchisees
Saw II (2005)
We return with part two of our series on the epic ten-part anime series, Saw. Does this sequel have two times the torture, two times the traps, two times the…
- The Franchisees
Saw (2004) (with Katherine Vienneau)
"I want to play a game. Listener... your whole life, um... no ok, uh *clears throat* the last few months of your life you've been listening to The Franchisees…
- The Franchisees
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)
Ben and Al reunite - not that you would have noticed. Thank god we've finally made it to the finish line of the Ninja Turtles franchise. There were some highs…
- The Franchisees
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows (2016)/Runnin' through the 6ix
We're comin' out! Out of the shadows that is. Yep, there's another Ninja Turtles movie: this one is the sequel to the reboot from 2014 that sucked. Is Out of…
- The Franchisees
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)/Physics, Oppenheimer, and the Wettest Rat in NYC (with Will Gertler)
Welcome back! 7 long years have passed since TMNT (2007) graced the big screen. Hundreds of people hard at work, scripting, planning, crafting, animating…
- The Franchisees
TMNT (2007)/The Drew Barrymore Crop Super Smash Bros. Melee Barbenheimer Special
What an episode we have for you this week. Is it about the 2007 computer animated Ninja Turtles movie TMNT? Well, partly. We get to it eventually, around an…
- The Franchisees
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (1993)
Boring ass movie alert! The Turtles go back in time... sounds like a blast from the past, eh? Well it's not, it's boring as shit! Join Alex and Ben as they…
- The Franchisees
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze (1991)
"Go Ninja Go Ninja Go!"These are the immortal words of the Jim Henson Creature Shop rapping animatronic they named Vanilla Ice. He's in this movie and…
- The Franchisees
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990) (with Jeremy Gross)
New franchise time! The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is one of the biggest and most profitable media franchises of all time. Comics, toys, TV series, movies…
- The Franchisees
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023)
Hot new release movie coming at you fresh off the resurrected legacy sequel pipeline. We saw Dial of Destiny opening night and recorded our thoughts just for…
- The Franchisees
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) (with Paul)
Join the Franchisees as we climb into the lead-lined fridge and survive the nuclear blast that is Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Is this film as bad as its…
- The Franchisees
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989) (with Alex Shute)
Happy Father's Day! Last Crusade conveniently landed on this important day where we all remember to call our father figures and acknowledge their existence. In…
- The Franchisees
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984) (with Sam Edwards)
***the following episode description has been written in the style of everyone's favourite Temple of Doom character, Willie***AHHHHH! OH MY GOD, THERE'S NO…
- The Franchisees
BONUS Official Paul Schrader Filmography Ranking BONUS
BONUS BONUS BONUSBen has now seen every film directed by writer/director, film critic, and legendary Facebook poster Paul Schrader. For that reason, as well as…
- The Franchisees
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) (with Sam Edwards)
The Franchisees are back with a new, exciting franchise: the Indian Jones films! Action, adventure, romance, and goofball gags galore. Directed by friend of…
- The Franchisees
Shanghai Knights (2003) (with Jordan Seccareccia)
Jackie Chan and Owen Wilson... the two best buddies in cinema history are back! This time they're on a new adventure to jolly old Londontown where they save…
- The Franchisees
Shanghai Noon (2000) (with Jordan Seccareccia)
We're back this week with a new franchise: everyone's favourite Jackie Chan action buddy comedy series... Shanghai Noon? That's right, The Franchisees are…
- The Franchisees
The Godfather Part III (1990)
The Franchisees wrap up another series with the final film in the Godfather trilogy, The Godfather Part III. Is it the worst in the series? Yes. But is it a…
- The Franchisees
The Godfather Part II (1974) (with Aidan Payne)
The Franchisees are back to discuss what is often called "the greatest sequel of all time." Is that true? Better than Paranormal Activity 2? You'll have to…
- The Franchisees
The Godfather (1972)
On this week's episode of The Franchisees we tackle a little known Italian-American gem: The Godfather.It's a classic. Francis Ford Coppola. We have no choice…
- The Franchisees
Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom (1975) (with Irene Theo)
We just couldn't talk about Pier Paolo Pasolini's "Trilogy of Life" without devoting an episode to his final film, his masterpiece, his first in a proposed…
- The Franchisees
Arabian Nights (1974)
One Thousand and One Nights. These hot stories go back, way back, possibly being the genesis of every horny yarn you've ever heard! Who better to adapt them…
- The Franchisees
The Canterbury Tales (1972)
The bawdiness and ribaldry continue in the second film of Pier Paolo Pasolini's Trilogy of Life, The Canterbury Tales. My god, what a picture! The stench…